Crazy trouble with love

Dolores and Harry

Series: Harry Potter

xxxxxxxxxxxx

-Hogwarts hallways-

Harry Potter sighed while rubbing the back of his knuckle while feeling the pain of the quill, ironically since it never touched him physically. 'Stupid Bloodpen, stupid Dolores!' He thought in anger as he headed into a hallway that he never noticed before. "If I ever see that quill again, I'll throw it out the window."

As he walked this peculiar hallway, he didn't notice that a solid black wood door appeared on his left side. "Now if only I could throw her out the wind…. what's this?" He said while noticing the door as it suddenly opened, as if a gust of wind blew it open, except it was not that windy today.

'Alright, that was just creepy.' he thought while looking inside the room.

Said room was covered in well….junk and the walls and ceiling were covered in silver and archaic symbols. On one side of the room was a picture of a dragon eating its own tail and on the other side was a picture of a man, old and decrepit, cutting down a man with a scythe in one hand and holding an hourglass in the other.

"What is this place?" he muttered before hearing the doors shut behind him. He turned around and saw that the door was vanishing before his eyes, leaving him trapped in this strange room. "Great, I'm stuck in this strange room and I'm pretty sure it was never here before."

"Hey you." Said a low voice from the old man picture. "You with the Blood Pen marks."

"Huh?" Harry turned to the picture and blinked. "I'm losing it, now I'm hearing voices."

"No you're not." Spoke the picture annoyed. "And stop looking at old Father Time like a nervous school boy."

"Oh! Sorry, I didn't expect any talking portraits in here. Honestly I figured you were a normal picture cause you weren't moving."

"Then you're a fool." He frowned. "Now tell me, why are you here in the Room of Requirements?"

"Is that what this place is called? Cause I've never heard of it."

"Foolish boy." He said. "This is a special room the founders made to help students in need but will only appear if said student or students really need it. Heck it can become a training ground, a storage compartment, a small home, if you need it, then the room will grant it."

"Anything?" Harry asked with interest.

"As long as it's practical. Then yes, you whipper snapper."

"Well, a chair?"

A chair of solid granite appeared in front of Harry.

"Care to sit down?" The painting asked while eye gesturing to the chair.

Harry walked over before sitting down in it.

"Now tell me," Old man time asked. "Why are you so glum? It's a good year and you must have lots of friends to share it with."

"I'm just upset with my new teacher for defence against the dark arts. Apparently her punishment involved using a blood quill on me."

This got the picture angry. "Those blasted and illegal magics! Now who would dare use that on a minor magician like yourself?"

"Her name is Dolores Umbridge."

This caused the old man's face to soffen. "Oh, her. Tisk Tisk Tisk. So that's what happened after that night so many years ago."

"What night? You know her?"

"She was a student here, Slytherin if I remember correctly. And to answer your question, that was the night that a Howler from her father came and told her to either excel at her studies or be disowned by him." The picture sighed. "Shame too, because she was taught to hate non magical folk and never had a real home here at Hogwarts."

"So she wasn't always arrogant and narcissistic?"

"Nope. Just lonely and at the crossroads of turning dark by her father's arrogant beliefs."

"Wow, that's pretty sad." he frowned. "I wonder what she was like before."

"So you want to know?" The man smiled. "If so go to the Ouroboros picture and say 'October 31, 1958'."

"Why?"

"Because you might learn something." He said before becoming silent.

Harry looked at the picture of the dragon and got up before slowly walking up to it.

"Here goes nothing, October 31, 1958." Harry said as he watched the dragons mouth slowly moving back and away from the tail as a bright light came from the picture. As he looked on, he found himself seeing Hogwarts changing from a new and modern stone work to semi old stone work at rapid speeds.

"W-What's going on!" he called out to the air as everything stopped with everything looking like it was from the late fifties as the door swung open with a deafening crash. He jumped and turned to the door. 'What the hell was that?'

He walked slowly out of the room as the door behind him slammed shut and vanished. He looked around and saw the halls were older looking, but still seemed relatively new compared to before.

"Hey." Yelled a Prefect with red hair. "Get back to the Grand Hall, new blood."

"Oh! Sorry." he apologized before hurrying down the hall. Only to marvel at the relatively new and more colorful Grand Hall, with pictures of Dumbledore in combat robes battling some Nazis and Communists. 'Woah, that's new. Why would they hang those up if that happened years ago?'

"Hello?" Asked a girl with brown hair. "Yes you, it's your turn to be sorted."

"Me?" he pointed to himself. "But I'm already in a house."

"What? Oh it must be a joke gag," she pointed to the robes. "If your parents gave you their handmedowns."

"No, I'm not joking. This is my real robe." he frowned. "Just who are you anyway?"

"Oh Minerva Mcgonagall." She said before pushing Harry to the hat."Now get up there young man."

His eyes widened before looking at the sorting hat and noticing the floating candles while sensing everyone was looking at him.

"Hurry up!"

"Just get the hat on!"

"Come on!"

"Don't be a bloody idiot!" The crowd yelled before Minerva glared at them, making them shut up as Harry placed the Hat on him….again.

'This is really weird. Her names like my head of house, floating candles, old tapestry, and now the sorting hat all over again? It's almost like…..the past.'

'Hmm…..looks like a future student has used the Room of Requirements again.' The hat said in Harry's head. 'And he's a Gryffindor and Slytherin, very unique for a boy your age.'

'What! But I'd never be part of that house!'

'Tell that to your parseltongue.' It said. 'Now why are you here? The past is no place for a child like you.'

'All I did was go in that room and meet Father Time, say a date to a portrait, and suddenly I'm here!'

'...did you wish to see someone here?' It asked. 'Because that room is only shown to those that need it.'

'But what could I need? All we talked about was this woman I couldn't stand, and then…..oh bloody hell.' he thought with wide eyes. 'Am I supposed to meet her and learn about her?'

'Her?'

'Dolores Umbridge. Am I supposed to meet her? Is that why I was sent back here?'

'Oh the Slytherin misfit.' It said with a nod. 'If that's your reason then,' "SLYTHERIN!" It called out as the entire Slytherin table cheered, well except for a young woman sitting at the far side of the table away from everyone else.

Harry put the hat down while walking to the table with dread and ignoring the frowns from the other tables.

"Looks like we have a new snake." Spoke a boy with dark brown hair. "Now tell us, what's your name?"

Harry gulped. 'If this is the past, I can't use my real name. I can just tweak it a bit and they'll never find out.' "My name is…..Herman Portley."

"Well the name's Tom." The boy grinned. "Tom Riddle."

Harry's eyes widened with his fist unconsciously clenching at the name.

"Something wrong?" Asked a boy with long light blond hair.

"Uh, no. Nothing at all." he barely got out while trying to relax. 'Don't cause a scene or you'll mess things up!'

"Oh and where are my manners?" He said. "Lucius Malfoy at your service."

"Uh, nice to meet you." he spoke while trying to keep from scowling. He walked past them and took a free spot to sit down while letting out a deep breath to himself.

"Stressed too?" Asked a girl with chestnut brown hair while holding a picture of a pink cat.

"Uh, a little. First year jitters." he tried laughing it off.

"Yea. Most first years are like that." She sighed. "But that's what you get for eating sweets on the train before coming here."

"So, you like cats I take it?" he asked looking at the moving picture.

"Yep. Cute, intelligent and they don't pee on the bed." She shivered at the last part. "Um are you pure or half blood if you don't mind me asking?"

"Well….my dad's a pureblood, but my mom died and any records of her lineage was destroyed in an accident, so as far as we know I'm pure blood." he fibbed while trying not to focus too much on the details.

She looked at Harry with confusion. "O...k? But how did this accident start?"

"Well she was a new employee for the Ministry of Magic, but from what we know she came from a far away land, and when her info was getting put into the system, a spell went off on accident and caused a fire which burned most of the records."

"...wow. That's just harsh." She said before remembering something. "Oh right, the names Dolores Umbridge. And I hope we can be...friends?"

Harry's eyes widened. 'Of course! Cat photo should have been a dead give away.' "Sure, I'd like that."

"Thanks, what's your name again? I'm kind of bad at remembering names." She blushed with embarrassment.

"Herman Portley."

"You don't look Portly." She chuckled at her own joke. "You look like a Salazar."

"The one who made part of the school right?" he acted oblivious.

"Yes." Dolores said before giving Harry a picture of a black and white cat. "For you. This is mister Sockies."

"Oh, thanks." he held the picture with the cat snoring. "Uh, just out of curiosity, why are you sitting here by yourself?"

"Because no one wants to be near me." She sighed while her expression was holding back a deeper reason. "Plus it's calming, being alone."

'Wow, she actually seems friendly and nice. But what made her the way she is in the future? Her father doesn't seem like he made her change that much. But maybe it hasn't happened yet.'

Just then a owl with an iron beak flew in carrying a red letter, that Harry recognized as a Howler, before dropping it on the table.

"Stupid Ironbeak." Grumbled Dolores as she looked at the letter. "Um...sorry, but I have to go." She then sat up and walked out of the Grand Hall.

Harry blinked while noticing Lucius scoot over closer.

"Looks like the misfit's father is at it again." He said with a chuckle. "Hope it's not as bad as last time."

"What do you mean?" asked Harry.

"You didn't hear? Her father is a mudblood hater. Strong hatred for all muggles." He grinned. "And a role model for us purebloods."

Hearing that got some of the table muttering in agreement while Harry turned to where she left and made sure no one was watching before discreetly leaving the hall. But not before whispering, 'Panticus Wedius' which caused Lucius to have a massive wedge. Suffice to say the sounds of his screams and the laughter made him smile as he turned and walked down the hall.

As Harry turned a corner he heard the sniffling of a girl in the girls bathroom, which was reminded him of when Hermione was called a mudblood his first year. He made sure no one was around as he walked over and tried listening to what was happening inside.

"F-Father…" A familiar voice cried as Harry got closer to the stall. "...Why?"

'What did her father say?' Harry thought before walking closer to the door and well…getting hit by the stall door as Delores came out with red eyes. "Ow, that smarts…..oh um….hi?"

"Herman!" she jumped with wide eyes while frowning quickly. "What are you doing in the girl's room?"

"Well…..I was um...concerned about you and well against my better judgement." Harry blushed in embarrassment. "Walked into the woman's bathroom…"

She growled and wiped her eyes before walking up to him and slapping him. "I don't need any pity."

"Ow!" Harry yelped in pain. "Hey I wasn't pitying you! I was concerned about you." 'That was even worse then the Blood Pen!'

"Well don't be, I'm fine." she frowned before walking past him and out the room.

Harry stood there for a few seconds before running after her and grabbing her arm in the process….well that would have been the plan if they didn't trip down the stairs. With Harry landing under Delores' behind.

"Ah!" she jumped while wincing from the fall. "What the bloody hell is wrong with you!"

"Nothing!" He got out while feeling his bone heal a bit with some magic. "But what's wrong with you, I was worried and you try to push me aside."

"I told you I was fine, now buzz off." she growled while getting back to her feet before stamping off.

'Good work Harry, the girl you were suppose to help now hates your guts.' he thought while making sure he didn't have a broken bone and sighed before looking outside the window and saw it was getting dark. 'Wonder if I can get a bed.' He then saw a small wand on the ground next to his feet.

"Uh?" he reached down and picked it up. "Did Dolores drop it? Great, if I go to her now, she might think I took it. But if I keep quiet and she finds out, then she'll get mad either way."

"Hey Herman." called Lucius coming down the stairs. "You'd better get back to the dorms. If you're caught this late you might get taken to the Forbidden Forest and we might never see you again." he joked darkly.

"And what pray tell is in this forest?" Harry asked. 'Maybe Centaurs and giant spiders.'

"I heard there are dark creatures in there said to make even the best wizards cringe." he looked at the wand in Harry's wand. "Hey, did you steal Umbridge's wand?"

"What? No, I just-"

"Good one!" he laughed patting Harry on the shoulder. "First time here and you catch on quick. Stick with the rest of us and you'll be just fine."

"What?" Harry asked in confusion. "Stick with 'us'?"

"Oh right, new blood." He sighed. "I'm referring to the MGA, the Mudblood Gem Association."

"What's that?" he asked while trying to keep calm.

"It's a club me and the other muggle haters created. It's purpose is to make sure that us pure bloods remain in power and in perfect purity." He grinned. "If you want, I can make you vice treasurer."

"Uh, tempting offer, but maybe I can sleep on it. Where are the dorms at?"

"Didn't your mother teach you anything? It's in the dungeons like always." He grumbled before seeing Harry's scar. "And why the strange birthmark? Or is it a tattoo?"

'Shit!' Harry gulped. "Just a birthmark, been stuck with it since I was born."

"I see. Funny, I have a birthmark in the shape of…." He leaned in closer. "A chicken on my left thigh. Crazy right?"

"Yeah, real crazy." he nodded while internally laughing.

"Well better be off." Lucius said before turning and walking away with a dark chuckle. "Have fun wandering the halls."

'Note to self, hex his bed.' he thought while using his past knowledge and made his way to where the dungeons were.

"Oh?" Spoke a familiar teacher. "You must be Herman Portley. Umbridge was just talking about you."

Harry stopped and looked up at the familiar face of Professor Slughorn.

"Um? Is something the matter?" He asked confused at Harry's expression. "Is there mutton in my teeth again?"

"OH! No, I was just heading to the dungeons."

"What a coincidence," Slughorn laughed. "That's where I was heading, you know, introducing the new bloods to Slytherin house and all that yada."

"Well we can head there together." suggested Harry, relieved to see a good face in Slytherin house.

"You know," he smiled while walking with Harry. "I like you already and it hasn't been two whole minutes yet."

"Thank you professor."

"Any time." He said before remembering something. "You know, Umbridge was telling me how you nearly broke your back. Funny too since she never came and talked to me about this sort of thing before."

"Lets just say we had a disagreement." he replied.

"Ah. I see." He grinned before noticing the wand in Harry's hand. "Oh? You found Umbridge's wand. Good work. She was looking all over the place looking for that before I met you."

"Well I'm just hoping she doesn't take my head off."

"Oh no. That's not her nature. Maybe blackmailing you, but never causing physical harm." Slughorn said with a sigh. "But come along now, I think Umbridge would be more than happy to reunite with her wand."

Both reached the dark area and walked down to the portrait with the Bloody Baron on it.

"Password." It said with a grumble. "And don't even dare mention the insult made against me." He eye pointed to a tear in the portrait, about the size of a fingernail.

"Salazar is supreme."

"You may enter." He grumbled again as the portrait opened to reveal a hole shaped door.

Both of them entered with Harry seeing it was nearly the same as the last time he was here and spotted Dolores looking all over in panic.

"Where is it?!" She said in panic as she started lifting couches and the occasional table with adrenaline filled strength as she searched for her wand. "If I don't find that wand…." She then noticed Harry holding her wand. "You!"

He gulped and held her wand out away from him as she walked over and snatched it. "You sort of dropped it on the floor back there."

She looked at him for any sort of lie and found nothing of the sort. "I see. Thank you Herman." That's when Harry got a big surprise in the form of a light hug before pulling back with a light blush. "Just don't expect this all the time…"

Harry nodded before seeing the time show they had to go to bed and both of them separated to walk to their respective dorms. "Um. Night Dolores."

"Good night, Herman wand finder." She said before walking into the girl's bedroom.

'Odd nickname.' Harry thought as he entered the boy's bedroom and seeing that no one was around, hexed both Lucius' and Tom's beds with a curse that causes a person's skin to turn blue and their hair orange for about a month. 'Payback time.'

He slid under his bed and tried to relax to go to sleep and worry about his next plan tomorrow.

-next day-

"AAAHHHHHHH!" Yelled two voices in horror, aka Lucius and Tom.

Harry woke up and tried to keep from laughing as he saw both males run around with orange hair and blue skin.

"What the hell happened last night!?" Yelled Tom as he tried to pinch his cheek to wake up from this 'dream' and failed. "Ow!"

"Is this some kind of prank!" fumed Lucius. "Did someone come in here and hex us or something?"

"Maybe it was Peeves?" Harry asked while holding back tears of laughter. 'This is too much! Hahaha!'

"You rang?" Asked the poltergeist as it appeared out of a stone wall. He looked at the two boys before bursting out in laughter.

"SHUT UP!" They blushed before chasing the poltergeist around the room with Harry walking out of the room in a fit of chuckles as he saw Dolores sitting on a chair near the fireplace reading a book on potions.

"Morning." he greeted her.

"Morning." She greeted back before hearing the crashing of glass coming from the boy's bedroom. "What's the hullabaloo going on in there?"

"Eh, just a little prank." he shrugged.

"...what kind of prank?" She asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Someone slid in and made their-" he was cut off from the two males running out with the rest of the house able to see what happened.

Dolores blinked at the sight before laughing like crazy as she rolled onto the ground. "B-By God! Look at them! T-They look like blue monsters AHAHA!"

Soon the entire house was laughing with the two boys scowling and stamping to the bathrooms to try and clean the colors off. Which ended with them having an allergic reaction to the 'soap'. But it wasn't soap, but hot sauce!

"AAAHH IT BURNS!" Lucius screamed in pain. "IT BURNS!"

"So, wanna get breakfast?" Harry asked Dolores, trying to stifle his own laughter.

"Only if you tell me how you d-did that hot sauce part." She giggled in laughter as she got off the floor.

"Who says I did it? I just said they got pranked." he feigned obliviousness.

"I won't tell." She said with a snicker. "Now after you Herman."

Harry relented and told her how he hexed both their beds.

"That's brilliant." She chuckled as they walked out of the dorms. "That was bloody brilliant!"

"Let's just say I learned from some close pals of mine."

Dolores chuckled at that. "Well maybe I should meet these pals? Who knows, I might learn a thing or too?"

"You? I thought Slytherins didn't joke around that much." he teased.

"We do too." She frowned. "But we do it with," she casted a spell that turned Harry's glasses into fuzzy clown glasses. "Precision and well thought out planning." she lowered her wand. "But there's one thing I just noticed from you."

"What?" Harry asked while trying to not trip over his feet or anything else since the spell also changed his perception in his lenses.

"Your attitude seems more upbeat than the usual Slytherins. In fact, you haven't felt cold or dark one bit."

"Well not all snakes are cold and dark." Harry said while barely missing a pillar. "Plus Merlin was in Slytherin and he wasn't cold or dark at all."

"You know what I mean." she sighed as they sat at the table and started getting their plates filled.

Harry sighed before accidentally stubbing his toe on a chair leg and started to curse in parseltongue. "SISAHASA!" (FUCK THAT HURTS!)

Instantly Dolores turned to him with confusion. "What was that?"

"Um what was what?" He feigned obliviousness. 'Crap!'

"You sounded like a snake just now."

"What? That's ridiculous…." Harry then kicked his leg against a stone wall. "SSAHISSAISA!" (FUCKING HELL AND VOLDEMORT'S BALD HEAD!)

"You did it again!" she frowned. "Just what the bloody hell are you saying? I've never heard that language before."

"...can you keep a secret?" Harry asked while looking around. 'Hope no one else heard that.'

"Depends." she shrugged.

Harry looked again before whispering. "I kind of speak Parseltongue. It's a language that allows one to speak to snakes."

"Really!"

"Yes but it's kind of rare." He said while sitting down. "I think Salazar was the only one in this school to know Parseltongue." 'And Tom aka Voldemort.'

"That's incredible! We should tell the others." she whispered with excitement. "That's gotta be worth respect."

"Bad idea." Harry frowned. "If someone knew this, they might tell me to do something stupid like commit murder." 'Or open the chamber of secrets and release a basilisk into the school pipes.'

"Oh you're just exaggerating." she waved off. "I mean, with something like that, you could be seen as head of house. Lucky…" she muttered the last part.

"Well it's better to be behind the scenes then having a spot light dangling above you like a news reporter." Harry said while placing a hand on Dolores' shoulder. "Plus I think you're a better person to lead Slytherin." 'Just don't enforce Blood Pens!'

She gave a brief smile before frowning and looked away. "Yeah right."

"What? Can't a snake have some humility?" He joked. "Plus you are a senior here so technically you are a leader to the….new bloods such as myself."

"The what?" she turned to him with a frown.

"New bloods? You know new students?" Harry asked confused. "It's been used a lot by some students and professor Slughorn."

"Yeah, and filled with the kids who think I'm a fool." she gripped her fork. "Who tease me, mock me, and think I won't be calling the shots one day. Well I'll change all that and make them BEG for mercy."

'Crap! Not good!' "Well maybe you should just calm down and eat. And between you and me, I think you will change everything." 'Hopefully for the better not…..what's going to happen.'

Dolores frowned, but complied and started digging into her plate with anger.

"Wait Dolores! Calm down or you migh-" he was interrupted by said witch choking on her food. "Choke. Hold on! I'll help." he got behind her and wrapped his arms around her before he started pushing up against her stomach. As he did so, a piece of chewed food popped out and landed on Tom's face.

"GAH!"

"Oh god, are you ok?" Harry asked with concern as Dolores gasped for air.

"Y….Yeah." she got out while taking in deep gulps of air.

"Thank god!" Harry sighed. "I didn't want my best friend dying on me." He blushed at the best friend part. 'God! I just called my professor my best friend….the world's officially ending.'

"Best friend?" she looked at him with surprise. "But we just became friends yesterday."

"Well even if we just met, you are a nice person and I would enjoy being friends with you." 'Hopefully this doesn't come back to bite me in the butt.'

Dolores was silent and Harry was worried he might have said too much.

"Dolores?" Harry asked. 'Please don't tell me I just made her pissed off.'

"T-Thanks Herman." she spoke with a happy smile before pulling him into a hug.

"You're welcome." Harry smiled before returning the hug. "What are best friends for."

Dolores felt good and kept the hug going a little bit more until they broke apart and sat back down.

-Two months later-

As the months passed, the friendship between Harry and Dolores grew and grew. Heck they now are pranksters in crime. But that's besides the point, Dolores now explained what occurred in the bathroom that one time and suffice to say, Harry cursed in both English and Parseltongue that if he ever saw him, he would hex him to oblivion. Oh and Harry also toned down Dolores' views on muggles and half bloods, to a point, she still dislikes them but not enough to commit anything drastic like her alternative future self.

As of now, Harry was being quizzed on Potion making with Dolores as his tutor. And was doing decent.

"Herman."

"Yes?"

"The answer for number two is not Salazar needs a bath, it's use a drop of unicorn blood while stirring in a caldron of dragon's blood to get a chemical reaction that's similar to fear pheromones."

And by decent, I mean terribly.

"Sorry, spacing out."

Dolores sighed. "Really? Even after I showed you mister Sockies tap dancing over a witch's pot?"

"Sorry." he blushed in embarrassment.

"It's fine." She said before looking at something odd. "Why is the date on your parchment saying 1994?"

Harry looked and paled seeing the date before taking the parchment away. "Must be a typo."

"With a magic pen? Highly unlikely...unless you were daydreaming about the future again."

"Uh? Oh, you got me." he pretended to act like she caught him.

"So what was it this time? Flying cars? Instant 'mail'?" Dolores asked with a little interest, especially after Harry found a book made by a muggle named H. . He's now her favorite author.

"Uh, quills that don't run out of ink."

"...now that I would love to see." She chuckled before seeing a doodle on Harry's parchment, which was a robed man dancing the can can. "Really Herman?"

"What?"

"Why doodle when you have an exam next week?" She asked while turning a page in her book on potion making.

"Sorry, it helps pass the time."

"All right but don't do that too much."

"Gotcha."

Dolores chuckled. "Now what is the color of a…..huh? A goat's brain under moon light?"

"Hmmm, is it….blue?"

"It says here…..pink." She said confused. "Ok? Whoever wrote this is either joking or batty."

"Or both." he joked.

She chuckled at that before noticing that her wand was gone….again. Well to be fair, it has been happening for weeks now, her wand vanishes and turns up in strange places like under a table under Hufflepuff table or on top of Peeves head. And single everytime, Harry finds it and returns it to her a smile. 'He really does live up to the nick name.'

"Dolores?" Harry asked while seeing her panic again. "Want me to find it again?" 'Got to be the tenth time this week…'

"If you could."

Harry got up and started to look around the room, heck he's started looking under a couch….didn't help that it had one of those monster books that bite living under there.

"Grrrr."

He jumped and moved away from it quickly while looking around the nearby shelves. But the only thing he could find were tomes and….harpy feathers? "Um. It's not in here."

"Oh no." she groaned while standing up and started looking around frantically.

Harry then checked under the fireplace (thank heavens it wasn't lit) and saw it…..in the middle of the chimney. "Oh buggart!"

"Did you find it?" she asked walking over with relief.

"Yes but it's stuck in the middle of the chimney." He groaned before walking in and attempted to climb up….only to fall on his ass. "Damn it!"

"Oh you gotta be bloody kidding me!" she cried out.

"Well it could be worse." Harry said before getting a good grip on the stone chimney and started to climb up. "It could have been lit." 'This is way too much soot!'

"Be careful!" she called up.

"Will try." He grunted as he made it to the middle of the chimney. "Just make sure I don't get impaled ok?"

"Got it!"

Harry moved closer to the wand with one hand holding on the a wall, along with the legs, while another hand reached to grab it. "I got iT AHHH!" He screamed as he lost his footing and fell down the chimney.

"HERMAN!" cried Dolores who held her arms out while closing her eyes and braced herself.

CRASH!

'Ow...wait? What's that soft….crap!' Thought Harry before realizing that he was on top of Dolores and well….one of his hands was accidentally copping a feel of her breast. "Gah! Sorry!" 'Not good not good at all.'

"Ow." she groaned looking to see Harry's hand on her chest and scowled. "Herman…."

Harry gulped before jumping off of the now pissed of girl. "S-Sorry Dolores. I didn't mean it, honestly I didn't."

"Just give me my wand." she frowned holding her hand out.

Harry did just that. "Um right….are you ok?"

"I'm alright." she huffed brushing the dust off her. "Just don't get use to that."

"I promise." Harry said while taking some soot off his face. "God that chimney is way too dirty, someone needs to clean it or there might be a fire in the future."

"You could talk to Slughorn."

"I would, if he wasn't at that conference in London." Harry sighed before getting an idea. "Maybe WE can get it cleaned, plus who knows? Maybe some of the students might actually participate it, and maybe give you a position like….Great Leadwoman of the Student Cleaning department?" 'Or something like that.'

"Wow, you're bad at titles." she joked.

"Well we can't get it right the first time right?" Harry chuckled. "So how about it old chap?" 'Don't get offended by that!?' He chanted in his head.

"It's rude to call a girl old." she frowned.

"It was an expression. Besides you're kind of….cute…" 'Oh crap! I had to blurt that out.'

That made her blush and look away. "Thanks, but I need to do something now."

"Like studying?" Harry asked while nodding to the mountain of books on the table. "Or maybe we can….hang out at hogsmeade later today?"

"Close." she walked over to the chimney and started to eject a water stream upward into it. "But first, maybe clean this up first."

"That sounds fair." Harry smiled as he summoned some soapy water to clean the soot as he thought. 'Maybe this isn't so bad?'