Chapter Seven: In This World It's Hard To Get It Right

It is said that life is not about learning to wait for the storm to pass but learning to dance in the rain. But if that's true...I would gladly just wait out the damn storm.

Apparently school dances were a thing. Because Jamie actually went on the stupid date hunt for me. Even though I had only said yes to his crazy idea to only humour him.

"What's wrong with this guy?" he groaned on Thursday, when he caught up with me during lunch. "He's a teammate too. So I know he's not going to try anything."

I rolled my eyes. "Thank you, James Lucas Scott. But I think I'm going to skip the school dance altogether this time."

"You cannot skip your first school dance," Jamie said, seriously, "C'mon. I'm going with Alison."

"Madison."

"No. Her name is Alison."

"I meant, wasn't Madison the one true love of your life. I remember you raving about her in your letters. Whatever happened to her?"

"She started dating Chuck when we were in the 10th grade."

"Ouch. I'm sorry, Jamie."

"Yeah, me too but it's okay. I have Alison now."

I nodded. I hoped this had distracted him for the time being but Jamie was a Scott boy. And once something is on their mind it's extremely difficult to side-track them.

"Back to you."

I groaned.

"Look, if you don't pick a date, I'll have Uncle Lucas look into the one I do pick for you."

"Dude, he's my brother. So please don't."

"I won't tell him if you just say yes to the next guy that walks up to you."

And at that unfortunate moment, Ryan Summers walked up to us, yelling, "Hey guys! Lily, do you have a minute?"

"Yes, she'll go to the dance tomorrow with you." Jamie said, winking at me. "I've to go now. I'll catch up with you in English again."

Ryan looked utterly bewildered for a minute and then he said, "Oh, I take it you don't have a date to the dance tomorrow?"

"Not for lack of trying, trust me," I said, rolling my eyes. "What's up?"

"I did that interview with Peyton Sawyer. She's amazing!" he said, practically jumping up and down in excitement.

"Okay. Good for you," I said. "When's her article coming out?"

"I think on Monday. I just wanted to thank you again for helping me out."

I smiled at him. He took that as a cue to go on. "And I was thinking. I'd love to go to the dance with you tomorrow."

And had it not been for the fact that I was quite petrified of what Jamie might do if I told him I'd turned down yet another offer to go to the dance, I don't think I would have accepted the invitation.

"This was such a bad idea," I murmured to myself as I twirled around in my light green dress in front of the mirror. I noticed the necklace that I was wearing, and the ring that hung from it like a pendant. It had been easy so far to hide it from the world when I was dressing in t-shirts and jeans. But a dress did make it harder to lose it.

I took it off and placed it carefully inside my dresser and locked it. "See you soon."

"You look beautiful, honey," my mother said, from the doorway.

"Really? You don't think I should just wear my jeans and ratty t-shirt tonight?" I asked, still checking myself in the mirror.

"Your father would have been so proud of you, Lily," she went on.

"Of going to a stupid school dance?" I asked, trying to lighten the mood. I didn't know where my mother got the strength to talk about my dad, but it always broke my heart a little to know he would never know me.

"You know why," she said, coming closer to give me a hug, "And I'm also proud of you. You're a good person, Lily Roe Scott."

"If you only I could get the rest of my school to call me that!" I said hugging her back, "And don't worry about me tonight. Okay, mom?"

"When is your date coming to pick you up?" my mother asked now, "I'd like to meet him."

"Ryan should be here any minute and mom, it's not a date. It's just get Jamie to stop hounding me about not having a social life." I replied, rolling my eyes.

There was a knock on my door and the next minute Ryan Summers let himself inside. He really did look nice in a suit.

"You must be Ryan," my mother now said.

"I am. Hi, Lily. You look beautiful," he said, he extending his hand to my mother, "Hello Ms. Roe."

"It's Mrs. Hargrove, but hello to you too," she said, "Now, get my daughter home by eleven and be careful while driving."

"And don't try anything funny tonight," I added as we climbed into his car.

"Are you kidding? Half your family is chaperoning tonight. I'd be crazy to!" Ryan laughed, as we drove off to school.

The school looked really pretty with all the decorations. You couldn't tell it was the same hell hole that we went to during the day time for classes. And Jamie was happier than I was when he saw me arrive at the dance on Ryan's arms.

"You're finally acting like a normal human being," he said, offering me a glass of punch.

"This is punch, right?" I asked, apprehensively.

"Dude, my dad and your brother are chaperones. Of course it's punch." Jamie said, drinking from his own glass.

"Well, I'll drink to that," Ryan said, helping himself to some.

The rest of the evening passed by pretty painlessly. I danced with Ryan and refused to slow dance with him though. I had almost forgotten the world outside but just when I thought things couldn't get worse, the organizer and the social chair, Claire McPhee got up on stage to congratulate everyone on how great the dance had been.

"Everyone who has helped organize the dance please give yourselves a pat on the back," she said, grinning, "And we are about to have our last dance for the evening. Thank you everyone for coming out tonight. Goodnight!"

"Do you want to dance to this slow number?" Ryan asked, turning to me.

"Actually, I want to take you somewhere." I said, offering my hand to him, "Want to come along?"

"So this is the infamous Rivercourt!" Ryan said, with a whistle.

I was walking on the stands now, right to the end and then turning back as I spoke to him, "Yes, it is."

"It is a beautiful place," he said, looking around, "I cannot believe I never took the timeout to come down here."

While Ryan kept up with me on the ground, I kept walking on the bench, and then turning on the edge and walking back. I was slowly gaining momentum.

"Do you want to know why I shut off the world from my life?"

Walk, walk, walk and turn.

"Why?" he asked.

Walk, walk, walk and turn.

"Because of a boy."

Walk, walk, walk and turn.

"He broke your heart?"

Walk, walk, walk and turn.

"He wrecked his stupid car."

Standstill.

"Is he…?"

"He's fine."

"Did you love him?"

Walk, walk, walk and turn.

"I do."

Walk, walk, walk and turn.

"What happened?"

Walk, walk, walk and turn.

"Everything and nothing."

Walk, walk, walk and turn.

"What was his name?"

"Joshua Pierce Sangster."

Walk, walk, walk and turn.

Walk, walk, walk and turn.

Walk, walk, walk and turn.

"Did he break your heart?"

"But I broke his too."

Standstill.

"Is that why you came back to Tree Hill? To fix your broken heart?"

I was walking like a lunatic by now. One wrong turn could hurt me, but I couldn't stop. Suddenly, the dam had broken and I had to let someone in. Ryan Summers was the only one around and I figured it couldn't hurt.

"I don't know. Can you break a broken heart?"

"You need to slow down, Lily. If you keep walking and turning like this, you can fall. Be careful."

"That's what I kept telling myself. To be careful, but it's never enough. I didn't know…Ryan. It wasn't my fault...you have to believe me!"

"What wasn't your fault?"

"That Joshua wrecked his car."

At this very minute I twisted my ankle and crashed onto the ground. I hit my head pretty badly.

"LILY!" Ryan yelled, as he rushed over to me and felt my whole world get plunged into darkness.

Author's Note: I always wanted to write the scene of Lily walking on the benches like a lunatic, and turning. Very Sound of Music-ish. :) I really liked that. I hope I could convey the conflict Lily Roe Scott is feeling at the moment...she has finally let someone in but it's like the voices in her head are really tearing her apart.

Title of the chapter is borrowed from Ingrid Michaelson's Everybody :D