The sea was flat and black beneath them. From where they sat, high above, on the cliff top, closer to the sky than the sea, they couldn't see how the wind ruffled the water into waves that crashed and shattered against the shore, scattering glossy pebbles against the sand.
Inside the car, far below the moon and the stars, it was warm, and the air smelled of grease and fish and chips – a smell Connie knew she would be smelling for weeks to come. The scent would linger in the stitches of the leather seats, and would disperse everty time she sat down, making her remember this moment.
Rita speared a particularly long chip onto the little wooden fork and held it up before her, contemplating it from various angles.
"I can't remember the last time I had fish and chips by the sea."
She said, bringing the chip to her mouth and biting off the tip, chewing slowly, savouring the warmth and the acidic bite of vinegar.
"Well, it's hardly the weather for it..."
Connie glanced up at the sky, how calm and deceptive it looked up there, when down here on earth the wind whipped and howled and the temperature made the drizzle of rain freeze on her windscreen.
"We should do it again in the summer."
She added, sipping carefully from a can of Coca Cola. They had bought two, though somehow they had ended up sharing the one that Rita had opened, and she thought to herself how she couldn't remember the last time she had tasted a fizzy drink – perhaps as a teenager, she thought, as the bubbles made her eyes water.
Rita took a second bite of her chip and glanced to Connie as she chewed. She couldn't help but focus on what she had said, and a flurry of hope and pure happiness writhed within her because of the new found knowledge that Connie wanted to do this again...she had mentioned their future as though it were real. She had mentioned an outing, together, in the distant future, without blinking an eye.
For a moment she wanted to ask what else they might do together, but she found she didn't want to jinx the here and now.
"Do you come here a lot?"
She asked instead, her breath warm as she spoke, and before Connie replied she popped the rest of the chip into her mouth.
Connie swallowed the mouthful of fish that she was eating and licked her lips.
"I come here to think."
She paused and pushed her fork into the soft white flesh of her cod that she held in her lap, all wrapped up with crisp white paper that crinkled and rustled every time she moved.
"I've been here more often lately."
She added, allowing herself to bare a little piece of herself.
"What do you think about?"
She asked, reaching for the can that was nestled into the cup holder between them. Though it had been taken from the fridge it was vaguely warm. She took a sip, aware that what she had asked was a much more personal question than she would usually ask, and certainly a much more personal question than Connie would usually answer.
"Oh...so many things. Work..."
She glanced to Rita, meeting her eyes.
"You."
Rita lowered her gaze to her own meal. She wondered if Connie realised how obvious it was that she had missed out what had happened that night. Surely, surely she must think about that, too?
"Me?"
She asked, taking another sip of the drink before placing it back into the cup holder.
Connie leant her head back against the head rest and looked up at the moon through the window. It was so clear that she could see the dark grey craters upon it's surface.
"I think about you most of the time."
She admitted.
"I think about what we were, and what we have become. I think about each day we have spent together, and I think about how unlikely this all is...I worry about the future, about Grace...I worry about our lives together, I worry about losing you as I did Grace...and I wonder if you think about a life with me, too..."
"I do."
She hadn't meant to cut her off, not really. But the desire to put an end to the other woman's worrying was too great to ignore. Of course she thought about it. She day dreamed about each day with Connie, and about what a life time with her would be like.
Connie touched her tongue to her teeth, the faint ghost of a smile struggling its way to her lips.
"Is this all too soon?"
She asked, her voice soft and faraway.
"No! I don't think so...do you?"
Rita asked, second guessing herself as soon as she had spoken.
Connie smiled slightly.
"No, not really."
She touched her fingers to her lips.
"Dixie said-"
Rita stopped abruptly, realising what she had said and Connie's glance swivelled towards her, a frown creasing her forehead.
"Dixie?"
Rita rolled a chip back and forth with her fork.
"She said that if you fall in love, you fall in love...there's nothing you can do about it."
She poked the chip with the prongs of the fork, just enough to break the skin.
"And to whom was Dixie referring to when she said this?"
Connie asked slowly, her voice low, and Rita had the skin-prickling feeling that used to haunt her when it was 'Mrs Beauchamp' who was speaking to her.
Rita glanced at her, she could feel her pulse within her throat, but when she looked at her she realised the glare she had been expecting wasn't there, only a look of slight confusion.
"I spoke to her,about us..."
"Ah..."
Rita raised an eyebrow, not quite knowing whether to assume the small noise the other woman made to be a positive or not.
"What about us?"
She asked, realising Rita was floundering.
"Just about how I feel about you. And how I worry that I won't be able to please you...I'm not experienced in..."
She waved a hand, gesturing in the hopes that Connie would realise what it was she was trying to say.
"Well, neither am I?"
Connie said slowly, hoping she had got the right end of the stick.
"You aren't?!"
Rita asked, and her voice was so full of surprise that Connie coughed without meaning to, almost choking on a laugh.
"Not at all...!"
She laughed, amused that Rita would think such a thing.
"I just thought...maybe you had because of how you..."
She felt her face grow warm and Connie bit her lip against her smile.
"I've never had a sexual relationship with a woman before."
She said softly, and she slipped her hand over to Rita's for the second time that evening, and Rita felt her whole body exhale with relief as the other woman's fingers held hers. She thought of when they had bought their fish and chips. They'd walked into the little shop, holding hands, they'd stood in the queue of two other groups of people. She'd glanced down at their hands more than once, and when their turn came she'd struggled to keep the smile from her face as they'd ordered, the man serving them giving their joined hands a quick glance, and that was it, but that was enough to make Rita feel like the luckiest woman in the world. She was overwhelmed with pride to be standing next to the woman beside her, completely unaware that Connie felt the same.
She drew in a long breath and exhaled before she spoke again.
"I'm sorry...for speaking to her."
She said quietly.
Connie gave a squeeze of her fingers and shook her head.
"You needn't be sorry. She's your friend. Though I would like to keep things to ourselves just until after I've told Grace. I don't want her to feel she was the last to know."
She said, and Rita nodded slowly, relieved to have told her, and even more relieved by her response.
"Of course...Dixie won't say a word, I'm sure."
Connie pressed gently on her hand again, and smiled, her eyes catching the light of the moon.
"Let's finish up here and get back home shall we?"
She asked, watching as Rita tried to spear her last piece of fish onto the fork.
"And I can show you how inexperienced I really am."
She added, watching Rita's eyes widen and her hand slip as she spoke, sending the piece of fish bouncing over her knees and down into the foot well.
Thank you so much for the reviews! LittleBooLost – I wouldn't bother having a look for your ears until after you've read the next chapter, I don't want you losing them again! ;)
Lollyblanc – Thank you so much for your lovely reviews! The next will be what you asked for – a chapter of them back at Connie's :)
Danielle: Connie certainly has more up her sleeve! ;)
Saz: Quite soon you'll get to see Rita's protective side, she's going to do quite a bit more of her guard dog routine! And then later on in the story (quite a bit later) her jealous side will surface... ;)
And thank you to everyone else, too! I will update again later this evening. I've got plans for it to be another 'M' rated chapter, but am always open to suggestions...! xxx