Chapter 15. Hope you enjoy! Thanks so much for the reviews for chapter 14. You guys are awesome. Seriously awesome. Thanks for being honest about the story and remember to review and critique. I always welcome feedback on where I am going with the story.

Jacob drove me home in silence. Every so often he would glance over at me, as if he were checking that I was still there, or okay. I got the feeling a couple of times that he wanted to take my hand as he would take his hand off the steering wheel and place it between us. I wasn`t going to take it, no matter how much I wanted to. I was still processing everything that had happened. Jacob was a vampire slaying wolf. I was his soulmate. His imprint. The powers that be had decided long ago that we were destined for each other. I just couldn`t digest it. I looked over at Jacob for a while. He was handsome. He had always been cute but now...since he had changed he had lost all his boyishness. He looked about twenty five to be honest. He radiated strength and power. Authority. Security. What I have seen of Jacob`s personality I didn`t like. He was sullen. He was arrogant. He was intimidating. He was spiteful. He was mine. Oh man!

"Your house is empty." He stated a couple of minutes before we got to my house.

"How do you know that? Can you read minds like the freak?" I asked. Oh God! Please no. I don`t want him knowing what I thought about him.

"I can`t read minds like the freak. I have super hearing. One of the perks of being a wolf." He gave me a humorless smile. Wow. Super hearing.

"And super strength?" I ventured. That would explain a lot about him.

"Yep. Strong as an ox. A great catch." He wiggled his eyebrows at me. I rolled my eyes at him but I couldn`t hide my smile. I hid my head so he wouldn`t see it.

"So...do you want to come in with me or something?" I asked him as he parked in my drive. My car was there waiting for me. Jared was quick. I wondered what had happened to it.

"Only if you want me too." He said quietly.

"I don`t want to be alone. Not now." I couldn`t hide the nervousness in my voice.

"Nothing will happen to you in La Push. But I`ll come in anyway. You shouldn`t be alone now."

"Jacob?"

"Yeah?"

"Em...thanks...for staying with me. But don`t...start any fights."

"I`ll try not to. Come on. You need a shower. You stink." Jacob wrinkled his nose and looked disgusted. I sniffed at myself. I didn`t smell anything. "You smell of leech. Of him." Ohh. Okay?

"They smell? Of what?" I asked curiously.

"They smell sweet. Like too much sugar. Like cheap perfume. It`s sick. I don`t want you to smell like that ever!" Wow! Okay. Easy there Jacob.

"Okay, I`ll shower." I retrieved my bag from the car and got the keys out. I let us both in and turned to Jacob.

"Em, make yourself at home." I cringed. Oh God! I sound like such a dork!

"Yeah okay, just shower."

After I had scrubbed myself clean (I hope) of the vampire smell, I padded into my bedroom to find Jacob sprawled on my bed reading a magazine. He had taken his shirt off. Damn he was hot. I felt a deep heat burn at my vagina and my clit throbbed in excitement. Oh man! Fuck. I wanted him.

Jacob lifted his head off up off the pillows and looked at me with dark eyed intensity. With lust. He actually growled which made me jump a little. Don`t do it Sonia! Don`t do it! He loves Bella! He doesn`t love you!

"I need..." I trailed off as Jacob got off my bed and moved closer to me, I actually blushed at the massive hard on he was sporting. Oh sweet Jesus in heaven.

"What do you need? I`ll give it to you." He whispered huskily, standing impossibly closer to me. I clutched at the towel I had around me tightly.

"I need to get dressed..." I choked out. Fuck me this was way too much. I chanced a peek at Jacob`s face. He looked embarrassed. He cleared his throat before stuttering out.

"Yeah..em...sure...I`ll...wait outside." He fled from the room, closing the door quietly behind him. I let out a deep breath and praised myself silently for my steely resolve. Man that was a close call.

When it came to Jacob I think I needed to expect anything and everything.

After I had put on some fresh clothes and inspected my hand and face for a while I made my way into the living room, where I could hear the TV. Jacob was sitting on the floor with the remote in his hand. He glanced at me once before turning back to the TV. He was blushing. Which made me blush. I sat with my legs curled under me on the sofa. He had on some stupid football game. Sports was something that we never watched in my house, unless it was gymnastics or dancing.

"You like football?" I decided to make some polite conversation. Why not get to know my soulmate a little better?

"Yeah." Came his short reply.

"Okay."

We were silent for about ten minutes. I focused my attention between the game and Jacob`s hulking figure on my floor. Damn this was too strange. This guy was my mate? This wolf? This sullen teenager in a man`s body was my destined one? Then it dawned on me. I understood him now. Why he was so angry. Why he was so bitter. He didn`t choose any of this. He didn`t want any of this. The girl he chose he couldn`t have because of all this supernatural shit. He was stuck with me because I was his wolfs mate. Not Jacob`s. No wonder he hated me. He didn`t know me. He definitely didn`t like me. We had nothing in common except some bond called imprinting. He was bound to me for life and I to him. We had no choice in the matter. No matter how beautiful he made imprinting sound, for me, now, it sounded like a life sentence in prison. I couldn`t leave him. I couldn`t leave La Push because he had to stay here and protect the tribe. Was there anything worse than staying in a loveless relationship?

He said he would be anything I wanted him to be. A brother, a friend, a lover. I wanted him as a lover. So much. I wanted his love. And that was selfish. When I got aroused so did he. He was picking up on my feelings for him. There was no mutual attraction. It was all one way, from me. What a fool I was. What just happened in the bedroom was because of me. What happened at his house the other day was because of me too! I felt a horrible wave of sadness wash over me as I realized that I would never be good enough for him. I wasn`t what he wanted at all. I wasn`t Bella. She was small. She was delicate. She had the pale skin, big brown eyes, luscious lips and long hair that would make any man who set eyes on her want to protect her. She was quiet, softly spoken and smart. I, on the other hand, was too much. I was rude. I swore. I fought. I was an average student at best. I drank. I smoked. I did drugs sometimes. No wonder Jacob was pissed at being stuck with me. He wanted a good girl. A nice girl. That just wasn`t me. I was ashamed to realize that I wanted to be Bella right now. I wanted to be on the receiving end of Jacob`s affections not on the receiving end of his scorn. What was the plan here? What was I supposed to do? I couldn`t change who I was for him. Deep down I would still be Sonia. I wouldn`t be good enough. Ever. And it stung. It hurt. It clenched at my heart.

"Do you want anything from the kitchen?" Jacob asked me. Breaking me out of my trail of thought. I looked at him shocked for a moment. Like I had just remembered he was there.

"No, I`m good." He looked at me frowning.

"What`s up?"

"Nothing."

"You`re lying. Tell me."

"Nothing Jacob."

"Just tell me. Is it...what happened earlier?"

"No. Don`t worry. It`s nothing."

"Is it your hand?"

"No Jacob."

"Just tell me...come on."

"Nothing Jacob. Seriously. Please leave it." He made to hold me but I pulled away and hopped off the sofa. I didn`t want him to touch me. Not when he wanted to be touching her.

"It`s me isn`t it!" He sounded wounded. "I knew it. I knew you would react this way." He got up and paced the small space of the living room.

"It`s not you Jacob." I said. I wanted to go to him. To hold him. I couldn`t though. I didn`t want to feed him any more of my emotions.

"Then what is it?" He snapped at me.

"Just leave it!" I snapped back. I want him to be angry at me. I wasn`t going to tell him what I had just come to realize. Not now.

"No!" He bellowed.

"Christ Jacob! Leave it be!"

"You`re impossible you know that? Of all the fucking girls...it was you." The way he spat out the you made me cringe. That hurt a lot.

"Yeah Jacob. It was me. Of all the girls you could have had it was me! I`m so sorry for you." I said sarcastically. Hate him Sonia. Feel it. Push him away. Give him what he wants.

"Not as sorry as I am."

"Great Jacob. Now I know where I stand with you."

"And where do I stand with you? Do you know how fucking confusing you are? One minute you`re turned on so bad the next minute you`re an ice queen. How do you think that effects me? What do you want from me. Just tell me!"

"The same that you want from me." I yelled at him.

"And what would that be Sonia? Tell me what you think I want from you."

"You don`t want me Jacob. So if you don`t want me you want nothing from me."

"Bullshit Sonia."

"It`s the truth!"

"Don`t presume to tell me what you think I want or feel. Try asking me first."

"I didn`t presume anything. I can see it in your face! I can see it when you look at me. When you talk to me. You don`t want me!" I screamed at him again.

"I don`t want you? Is that what you think? So wanting to fuck you so bad that you scream my name is not wanting you? Wanting to kiss you, to hold you, is not wanting you?"

"No it isn`t Jacob." I said quietly. "There`s a big difference between sex and love. You want to fuck me. Okay. You do. So do lots of guys. You don`t like me though. You don`t want to like me let alone love me. I`m not talking about sex! A relationship isn`t built on fucking! Does that answer your stupid fucking questions Jacob?"

He looked at me in fury for a while. He started to shake and little but calmed down when he saw the fear on my face that he would phase right there. What a horrible mess. What the hell are we doing here together? I sat down on the sofa with my head in my hands. I was defeated. Could I even fight this? Could I fight with Jacob anymore? I didn`t want to. I wanted things to go back to normal. I felt Jacob`s large, strong hands take my own and hold them. He was crouched in front of me with his chin resting softly on the top of my head. It felt so nice to have him near me. So right.

"I`m sorry Sonia. But please don`t think that I`m sorry about imprinting on you. I...we...the thought of not having you in my life now, the thought of you never existing...it`s impossible for me to comprehend. I`m sorry for this mess and I`m sorry for hurting you. I`m a selfish person and you`re right. A relationship isn`t built on sex. I was stupid to even think that you would agree to sleep with me when you know I`m in love with another woman. But understand...I love you too." What? He...loves me? I couldn`t hardly dare to hope that, but those three little words made me so happy that I wanted to cry again.

"I love you but I don`t know what way. I don`t know how. All I know is that it is there and I`ll have to deal with it until I understand it." Oh...okay then. So it wasn`t the romantic type of love then? It wasn`t what I felt. The disappointed washed over me as I looked into Jacob`s apologetic eyes. It was true. He wasn`t in love with me the way I was with him. The look wasn`t there.

"You love Bella. I can accept that. I think it`s the least of all the crazy things that`s happened today. I won`t get in the way. I know you want her. If you can have her then go get her."

"Why are you being so nice to me?" Jacob asked, perplexed.

"Because I`m sick of fighting you. Fighting against you. You don`t deserve to have me as your enemy." I smiled at him. What I said was the truth but I felt a horrible stab in the heart at the pain of their truth. I wanted him. So bad. He searched my eyes for something.

"I wouldn`t want you as my enemy."

"I make a great friend." I smiled my fake smile again. Oh God! You are such a dweeb Sonia!

"Alright then..." Jacob said a bit unsure.

"Do you need to go or something?" I asked. I wanted him to go so I could cry in peace.

"No, we can just hang out here. As friends do." He said, sitting back down on the sofa beside me.

"And do what?" I asked. Jacob shrugged.

"Dunno..talk? Eat?"

"If you`re hungry go get something."

"I would love a sandwich."

"Go ahead." I said grabbing the remote.

"With chicken and mayo." He said pointedly.

"I`m not making you anything. You should be the one making me a sandwich after my ordeal today." I snorted. Fuck him. He can make his own goddamn food.

"Ordeal? If Embry was a normal human he would be black and blue from all your trashing about."

"What the hell did you expect? Some half naked guy creeps up on you when you are running for your life from some mythical monster and tells you he`s taking you to said monsters house. Get a clue Jacob!" He laughed good naturedly.

"Come on Sonia. Embry`s harmless."

"Whatever. Head like a fucking boulder is what he`s got. And then the Edward freak! Eugghh." I gave a shudder. Jacob moved closer to me on the sofa.

"If you want me to kill him..."

"Nah, he didn`t hurt me. You don`t want Bella getting mad at you for killing her boyfriend now do you?"

"I suppose not." He said sadly. I looked at him pensively.

"If I were her I would choose you any day."

"Really?" He brightened considerably. A big goofy smile lit up his face.

"Eh Duh! You`re totally hot now. Edward has nothing on you in the looks department. You`re both weirdos though. Maybe that`s floats Bella`s boat." I giggled at him.

"Yeah yeah Sonia. At least I`m alive. Which is more than I can say for him."

"So what`s the deal with these vampires? Are they the Lost Boys kind or Interview with a Vampire? Dracula? How come they can come out in daylight?" I pressed.

"None of those. They don`t burn in the daylight. They sparkle."

"SPARKLE? You`re taking the piss." He was totally having me on. He looked at me in total seriousness until a smile broke out on his face.

"Yeah, I get why you don`t believe me. But it`s true. They sparkle. There`s no other word for it."

"What? Like a disco ball or something?" I said confused. Jacob roared with laughter.

"Exactly, like a disco ball."

"That doesn`t sound so scary." I pouted. What sort of pansy ass vampires were they?

"They are scary though. Not for me and the rest of the pack but for humans." He said, his mood instantly turned glum.

"So how can I recognize a vampire?"

"Come on Sonia. I won`t let one get within a million miles of you. You don`t have to worry about that." He placed a long, muscled arm over my shoulders. Oh heaven. He was so warm that I wanted to snuggle into him. I resisted that urge and sat up straighter.

"Please Jacob. All they all like that Edward guy?"

"Sort of. The ones that drink human blood have red eyes. They are all pale. Hard as stone. Fast. Strong. They are predators in other words. They exist to kill."

"And you exist to protect." Jacob gave me a soft look.

"Yes. Exactly."

"So you`re like a living legend." I said in awe. I knew that Jacob needed some type of comforting. He hated who he was now. Well he shouldn`t. He looked proud as he smiled.

"I am. Jacob Quileute Warrior Prince." He smirked at me and I blushed.

"I knew I shouldn`t have told you that!" I pouted and crossed my arms.

"Come on Sonia! I couldn`t believe it when you said that! I never believed in the legends until I phased for the first time. And you did."

"Yeah yeah Jacob. Where`s my sandwich?"

"You still want me to make you a sandwich?"

"I`m hungry! After all that stuff that happened to me today."

Remember to review. It makes the story better and the updates come quicker.