Chapter 19. Hope you enjoy. Thanks again for all the reviews from Chapter 18. You guys are great. Wonderful people. With this chapter I felt that Jacob and Sonia needed to get a little push in the right direction. Tell me what you think, what you like and don`t like so I`ll know what I`m doing wrong and right. Thanks and happy reading.
"Hey Sonia." Robbie said brightly at my front door.
"Hey Robbie." I smiled back at him. I heard my mother come out of the kitchen and into the hall. She looked from me to Robbie confused.
"Sonia who`s this?" She asked.
"This is Robbie mom. He`s taking me up to the Makah rez to watch a drum circle."
"Did you ask my permission?" Christ mom! Since when do you screen my friends?
"I didn`t think it would be a big deal." Stop embarrassing me mom!
"How old are you?" My mom interrogated Robbie, who by now looked throughly uncomfortable.
"Twenty."
"You`re not going anywhere Sonia!" My mom said at once.
"But mom!"
"But nothing! He is too old for you!"
"He`s just a friend!"
"Bullshit! And you.." My mom advanced towards Robbie. "She is just seventeen. Come sniffing near her again and you will have a big problem." With that she slammed the door in his shocked face.
"MOM!" I yelled.
"STOP IT! What were you even thinking? What about Jacob?"
"What about him? He doesn`t want me."
"I see the way he looks at you. Watches you. How can you say that he doesn`t want you?"
"Because he is in love with that Swan bitch!" I looked out the living room window and saw Robbie`s car driving off. Great! There goes my date.
"Or he thinks he does. Sonia, you know you aren`t the most approachable person around. Maybe you are pushing him to her." My mom suggested gently. "Try opening yourself up a little. Try trusting him."
"I told him how I felt...I told him that I was in love with him." I suddenly felt overcome with tiredness.
"What did he say?"
"He said that he loves me...but wasn`t in love with me."
"He needs time..to get to know you."
"But what am I supposed to do while he`s figuring everything out? What if he never falls in love with me and one day I find that my life has just gone by. Has been wasted."
"It won`t happen like that. Look at the others. They are all in love."
"But Jacob`s different. He`s the rightful Alpha. He knows what he wants and is strong enough to fight for it. Bella is what he wants and he`s fighting for her. I`m his imprint, he is bound to me. I don`t understand it. We are like chalk and cheese. We are too different."
"No you`re not. The both of you are actually quite similar. You are both insecure. Unsure of the other. Afraid of letting your guards down. What I want to tell you is that if you want Jacob, if you truly love him, then why not give him a chance. Try going out with each other. Like on a date."
"A date?" Was she actually being serious? The man is supposed to woo the woman. Not the other way around.
"Yes. Call him up. Ask him out." She urged. "I hate seeing you like this Sonia. So torn up."
"I don`t know." Should I?
"I can`t force you to do anything. But...if I see that Robbie fellow around here again you will be grounded. A boy that age only wants one thing. You don`t want Jacob to murder him do you?"
"No, you`re right mom. I just thought that I could have something normal. Go out on a date and not worry whether he is there because of me or because of some force that ties him to me."
"I know sweetheart. I know it`s tough for you. I know that it will turn out great in the end."
"How can you be so sure?"
"Because it`s destiny."
"That`s so lame mom."
"Just call him."
"Fine. I`ll call him. But if says no you have to take me shopping."
"Deal. Do it."
I went to my bedroom with my cellphone and dialed Jacob`s number. He picked up after about ten rings.
"What do you want?" He said rudely. I rolled my eyes.
"I want to ask you out."
"What?" He snapped.
"I wanted to ask you out on a date." I said slowly.
"You`re fucking joking right? Seriously Sonia? After all that shit..."
I hung up on him and threw my cell phone onto my bed. I got my answer. Now my mom gets to take me out shopping. My phone started ringing about a minute later. Jacob. Surprise surprise.
"Yes?"
"Okay Sonia. What game are you playing here?"
"I don`t play games."
"Were you serious before? Do you want to...go on a date with me?" He said this more gently than before.
"Yes...I would...love to go on a date with you." I replied softly. "But only if you want to go with me."
"Of course I would. I would love it." Did he actually sound excited?
"Okay."
"So I`ll come over to your place now?" What? It was only like eleven thirty.
"Isn`t it a bit early?"
"I want to see you." He said earnestly. Oh man...
"You do?" I asked, so unsure.
"I want to see you all the time." He whispered huskily. Oh Jesus...I actually had butterflies in my stomach.
"I do too." I admitted. Shit, shouldn`t have said that. My voice even sounded different when I said that.
"I can come over then?" He pushed.
"Yeah..." Why do I sound so weird?
"See you in about five minutes."
"See you." I breathed down the phone and hung up. Oh man...oh God...that went awfully fast.
"I told you so Sonia." My mom said from my bedroom door smiling.
"Whatever old woman!" I poked my tongue out at her.
"When will he be here?"
"He said in about five minutes." I replied, looking around my room in distaste. It sure was a mess. Clothes, books, magazines and various other bits of debris littered the floor.
"You should clean up in here sometime. I`m telling you this now because I don`t want to have to tell you later, no sleep overs with Jacob until you are eighteen." I must have turned tomato red.
"Don`t worry mom, we aren`t there yet.."
"Hummpff. I was a teenager once." Sick! Gross!
"Bye mom!" I sang, leading her out of my bedroom and shutting the door behind her. I decided to change my clothes while I waited for Jacob to come. Just as I was in the middle of putting on a black long sleeved top Jacob`s voice startled me from my window.
"Hey.." He said playfully, pushing the window up and jumping in.
"Hey..." I whispered back, blushing. He came towards me with the scary intense look in his eyes. The butterflies seemed to be going crazy in my stomach.
"You are so beautiful when you blush...it makes you look a bit vulnerable because you don`t do it often...only with me..." He trailed off and cupped my face. Fuck he is so hot. So fucking amazing.
"Jacob...are you mad at me?" I whispered up at him, searching his eyes for the truth. They regarded me back. His pupils were big, black, rimmed by a small circle of dark brown.
"I`m angry at myself Sonia. For not...wanting to get to know you...for hurting you."
"Oh..." Okay.
"Yesterday, all that stuff what happened. When you told me how you felt...I was shocked. But believe me, I do want to be with you. Give you everything, take you out, buy you gifts, protect you. I want to be your boyfriend."
"So you have...romantic feelings for me too?" I asked shyly. Jacob blushed a little.
"Yeah...I always had I think. I just thought that you wanted to be friends so I kinda suppressed them. But then, that day when I dropped you off at your dance class, I watched you run up and then look back...it hit me...hard. How perfect you are. How much you could hurt me if you ever rejected me. I got angry in the car and said all that shit because I wanted you to stay with me instead of going to that party. I wanted to be having fun with you instead of patrolling. I wanted to be a normal teenager for once and I was jealous that you could, and that you would choose that over me." Wow. Jacob was actually being honest. "And then, that night, when you came home drunk, when I saw your face through Quil`s memory it hurt at how much I hurt you, how your eyes would pain when he mentioned my name. I decided that night that I would make it up to you. Be good to you."
"Jacob, please, you don`t have to.."
"I need to tell you, you need to know. You told me what was in that crazy head of yours so it`s only fair that I tell you what`s in mine."
"Okay then, tell me." He sat me down on the bed and crouched in front of me, looking up into my face.
"When you told me that you wanted a boyfriend I almost snapped. Phased right there. The thoughts of you with another man...it made me want to hurt...to kill the idiot that would touch something as precious as you...someone that meant the world to me. I got into a huge wolf fight with Paul when I found out that you two...made out." His face hardened at that.
"That was the past Jacob. Paul and I are nothing but friends, always have been."
"I know...but still. When you told me that you loved me, when we were making out.." His voice got impossibly deeper and huskier. "it was probably the most amazing feeling I have ever felt, having you touching me...having you under me...touching you..." His eyes turned black now as they travelled along my body and face, he placed his hands on my knees and moved closer to me.
"I knew I could never lie to you though. I can`t, not now. I am falling for you Sonia...and I don`t want to stop it...not now...not ever..." He pushed my legs open gently and stood on his knees between my legs. His hands travelled the length of my thighs and up to my waist, lighting fires in their wake. I hesitantly took his face in my hands and moved in closer to him. I kissed along his jaw before finding his lips. The kiss was sweet, magical. But best of all it was pure. It wasn`t desperate like before, it wasn`t sexual. It was the best kiss of my life. I had never been kissed like that before. Never felt so alive and yet so at peace with one kiss.
Eventually Jacob broke away and pulled me into a rib squeezing hug. I was content to just stay like that with him. Holding him and letting him hold me.
"Jacob?" It came out as a bit muffled.
"Mmm?"
"I kinda need to go to the bathroom." It was true. I was desperate for a pee. He laughed a little before releasing his hold.
"Come back soon." He said, kissing me again. Oh man that will never feel old.
"Sure...I won`t get lost, it will give you some time to figure out where you want to bring me."
"Can`t we just stay here?" He jumped onto my bed and lay there, suggestively patting the space beside him. It was tempting but no.
"My mom is here, no way will she allow that today, she already scared one guy off." I immediately regretted saying the last part.
"What do you mean?"
"I was supposed to go out today...with a guy...my mom forbade it."
"Why?"
"Because...because he was too old for me."
"How old was he?"
"Twenty."
"She was right, he is too old."
"Yeah.."
"Would you have still went out with him? If she hadn`t forbade it?"
"Probably..."
"So why did you call me? Because you couldn`t have the other guy?"
"If I really wanted to go with the other guy..with Robbie...I would have went with him. The guy I really wanted was you...that`s why I called you. You know that." I said, wrapping my arms around his waist and pulling him into a hug. He sighed and wrapped his own arms around me.
"Promise you won`t go out with anyone else." He whispered.
"I`ll promise you that...only if you promise to give us a chance...and not see Bella."
"Bella is my friend, but if you want that...I`ll promise you it. I want you...much more than I have ever wanted her." That made me smile into his chest. I thought that would have been more difficult.
"Thank you Jacob."
"I know some ways you can thank me." He said cheekily, reached down to grab my ass. I found it both annoying and hot. I backed out of the hug and shook my head at him.
"Easy there wolf boy. I just agreed to be your girlfriend five minutes ago...don`t push your luck."
"You`re the one that called me and asked me out!" Jacob laughed and sat back down on my bed.
"I`m going to the bathroom now...don`t touch any of my stuff."
"I won`t..." Jacob said eyeing the disaster that was my room. Shit, I knew I should have cleaned it.
When I came back from the bathroom, Jacob and my mom were talking in my bedroom. When she saw me she smiled and winked. Jacob was smirking. What the hell did she tell him? Urrghh mom! I love you but...seriously?
"What`s going on?" I asked them, crossing my arms and pouting.
"Nothing..nothing..just talking to Jacob. I`ll leave you two kids alone." She pottered off to the bathroom to shower. I turned to Jacob who was still smirking.
"What are you smiling at dipshit?"
"Nothing..." He smiled widely and sat down at my desk.
"Tell me." I demanded.
"Make me." He countered. I walked up to him slowly and sat astride him with my hands around his neck. He gripped the backs of my thighs and shifted me up higher so our privates were practically touching. It took a lot of self control not to grind myself into him.
"Tell me." I asked again sweetly.
"Make me." He said again, moving his head into kiss me. I moved back just as he was about to kiss me.
"Tell me...please Jacob." I ground myself into him a little which make him growl. That was such a fucking turn on.
"Fuck Sonia...you`re so sexy..." He said weakly, pulling me towards him. He buried his head between my neck and shoulder and nipped gently at my skin. Stop it Sonia! Not now! Later...mom could walk in any minute.
"Jacob...Jacob..come on...not here..not now.." I said with as much strength as I could.
"You taste so good...your skin is so soft.." He whispered into my ear. I moaned a little as he trailed his fingers along my waist. That was so hot. I felt my nipples stiffen.
"Jacob please...not here." I pulled away from him and stood up on shaky legs. Jacob followed suit and adjusted himself. I could see the tell tale bulge of his erection through his jeans.
"Sorry Sonia. I have a hard time controlling myself when it come to you."
"Me too."
"If I`m pushing you.."
"No, you`re not. I`m not doing anything I don`t want to do, believe me." I smiled at him and he returned it readily.
"So what do you want to do today?" He asked me.
"I told you to decide. Surprise me."
"Well, I kinda want to introduce my new girlfriend to my friends and family for one." He said...proudly. Is he really proud of me?
"Oh? Is she anyone I know?" I asked playfully.
"I think so. Just the hottest, most beautiful, talented, funniest and craziest girl in the world." He replied, wrapping his arms around me.
"Oh wow, that`s one girl."
"You sure are."
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