Crazy trouble with love

Porlyusica and Natsu

Series: Fairy Tail

xxxxxxxxxxxx

-Fairy Tail Guild, main hall-

"Take that ice princess!" Yelled Natsu as he punched Gray in the face.

"Up yours lizard face!" he yelled back running back and kicking Natsu in the stomach.

Yep another brawl, another day at fairy tail. Though to be fair it was Elfman who started it by pushing Gray into Natsu, causing them to kiss by mistake. But now...

"You're dead now stipper!" Yelled Natsu while jump kicking Gray in the face. This didn't work as Gray grabbed his ankle and pulled him from the momentum and they crashed into a table at the same time.

Natsu growled before throwing a chair at Gray and missed as a tall elderly woman with pink hair, tied in a bun on the back of her head by two large pins with crescent moon-shaped edges, and with two bangs of hair left framing her face. Her attire was that of a dark green blouse with a tie around the collar, sports a crimson-colored cape, with a wide collar decorated by massive dragon horn-like decorations protruding outwards, and edges adorned by white, arch-like motifs, and paired with a long skirt. "Crap! Sorry!"

Her red eyes glared at him before running at him with a broom. "You're dead now! You peice of shit human!"

"AH!" he cried out before turning and bolting away.

"Get back here!" She yelled as she swung her broom like a mad woman, knocking down some guild members in the process.

"Porlyusica! Please calm down!" cried out Lucy.

This not only made her more angry, but it also earned Lucy the wrath of the former Fairy Tail mage.

"You are in the way!" She yelled before chasing both Natsu and Lucy around the guild. Only for another chair, courtesy of Elfman and Gajeel, to hit her. "...you."

Both males turned and saw a dark aura around her before she let out a primal scream and jumped at them.

"AHAH!" They screamed before, as if instinctively, blasting her with their magic.

"What the hell!" Lucy and Gray yelled. "Why did you do that!?"

"Sorry! It was a force of habit!" cried out Elfman.

"You…." Spoke a young voice from within the dust cloud. "Are dead now you stupid humans!"

Everyone turned and saw a figure slowly walk out while trying to blow the dust away.

As the smoke cleared, a young woman with pink hair walked out wearing Porlyusica's cloths. "What? Did I scare the living shit out of you humans?"

"P-Porlyusica?" spoke Erza in surprise.

"That's my name." She sweatdropped before seeing the looks on their faces. "What? Is there a splinter on my face?"

"Woah! You look way different." remarked Natsu being blunt.

Porlyusica blinked before looking at herself and gasped. "I'm young again…." She then admitted a dark aura. "Who is responsible for this?"

Everyone turned to Gajeel and Elfman.

"Oh," she frowned before whacking them with her broom. "Stupid good for nothing humans. Always causing some sort of damage to the laws of nature!"

"Wait, how did that even make her young?" asked Gray.

"No idea." She said annoyed. "Now if you excuse me, I'm here to speak with Natsu about his cavities."

"Wait, why do you need to check on that?" asked Levy with confusion and a grimace. "Isn't that for a dentist?"

"I'm a healer." She said. "And dentistry comes with healing."

"I don't have any cavities!" Natsu called out with a frown.

"That's not what Happy told me." She frowned. "That cat kept on annoying me about his father whining in pain every time he bit into a piece of meat."

"Happy you traitor!" he cried out to the cat on the counter eating a fish.

Porlyusica then walked towards him. "Open wide. And I won't have to force your mouth open."

"No!" he replied stubbornly with his arms crossed.

"Then you leave me no choice." She said before stepping on his foot, hard, which caused him to scream in pain as Porlyusica placed a piece of wood in his mouth to keep it from closing. "Now let's see what's the problem."

Natsu gargled out while trying to shut his mouth with force.

"Break it and your teeth will suffer." She said while examining the teeth. "By god. These are the worse cavities I have ever seen. Even worse than Erza's."

"Hey!"

"It's true and you know it." She retorted to the red head. "I recommend a root canal and some herbal paste."

Natsu paled while imagining fish flying away as he reached for them.

"It's not that bad," Porlyusica spoke. "Erza had the same treatment and she was fine. Even if she screamed and ran around the room before I knocked her out."

Everyone turned to Erza who blushed in embarrassment and looked away.

"But I didn't use anesthetic the last time." She said while Erza started to remember the incident as an expression of horror plastered itself on her face. "And I won't use it with you Natsu."

"AHHHH!" he got out before swiftly getting away from her and started running.

"Get back here!" She yelled before chasing after him. "Do I have to break your legs for you to hold still!"

Natsu paled as he ran faster and disappeared into a flower shop. "I hope...I lost her?"

"Not even close." Porlyusica said right behind Natsu. "Now come quietly and I won't have to break your limbs."

"AHHHH!" He screamed before running out of the store and into a...dentist's office? "Ok. This has to...work. After all, this is the last place Porlyusica would ever look for me."

"Hello Natsu."

Natsu gulped as Porlyusica walked towards him and clubbed him in the head with her broom before the world turned black.

(A few minutes later)

Natsu's eyes slowly moved as he saw that he was strapped onto a dentist's chair with Porlyusica performing a root canal...without anesthesia. And was hit with a wave of extreme pain.

"Finally awake?" She said while drilling his right molar. "Well you're just in time. I'm almost done with the left side."

"AAAAAAAAHHHH!" he cried out in pain while squirming in the binds.

"Hold still. If you struggle I might accidentally drill into your gums." She frowned while moving her drill to Natsu's right incisor. "Let me know if this hurts."

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"I'll take that as a yes." Porlyusica chuckled sadistically before moving the drill towards his back molars. "Now Natsu. If you calm down and stop acting like a brat, I will let you pick out a treat after the root canal."

'You know I won't be able to eat it!' he screamed in his mind.

"And I'm not referring to food." She frowned. "You're going on a fasting session for the next month after I'm done. Nothing but liquid food and my special herb paste."

Natsu inwardly cried in despair.

Porlyusica then finished the last molar before turning off the drill. "Finished. How did it feel?"

All she got was a moan in pain in reply.

"I take that as an ok." She chuckled before giving him a glass of herbal water. "Drink."

He grabbed the glass and reluctantly drank from it. Only to feel the pain go away.

"I see you like my lizard lung herbal water." She chuckled.

His eyes eyes widened before he did a spit take on her.

"...damn brat." She growled before punching him in the gut. "You didn't need to spit on me. There was a sink next to you."

He groaned while rubbing his cheek. "That hurt like hell."

"Yet you took it better than Ezra. She was screaming and crying after the procedure." she turned and started walking out. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going home."

"Hey wait a second!" He yelled while grabbing her arm. "What about that treat."

"Oh that." She sighed before giving Natsu a peck on the cheek. "Now if you don't mind. I have medicine to make. And I don't need you messing around. But know this," she said while walking away. "You're more then welcome to visit. Just not for too long."

Natsu's eyes widened while touching the spot she kissed him and momentarily forgot about the pain.

'Let's see if that brat can handle an older woman being kind to him.' Porlyusica thought with a chuckle as she walked back to her home.