Hey guys! So I finally got myself to update after my friend mentioned she hadn't seen a new chapter in a while. And I say seen and not read because she doesn't read my fanfic, but she followed it on an old account of hers so whenever I update she gets spammed. Or something like that.

How's life? Mine's okay, except for the fact there's this itsy-bitsy thing called the IB test coming up in less than 2 weeks. *makes face* Yikes! I should probably be studying for that, but whatever. Writing for you guys is so much more fun.

Now without further ado, I present to you all the latest Dear Mortals chapter!

Dear Mortals,

Hi, I'm blue.

*chuckles* Wow, you should have seen your faces! Oh, sorry if you found that rude. I just wanted to see what your reactions would be- my skin colour does shock most people, even my own son.

Speaking of him, how's he doing? *reclines on throne* I do try to see what he's up to now and then, but I figured you'd know more than I do. My children don't pop up here much anymore ever since Apophis was defeated, and it seems like you fan fiction writers have extremely creative imaginations about what they do in their free time. Whoops, I just thought of something inappropriate.

Anyways, I haven't heard from Sadie in a while. I do hope Anubis is treating her well- or is he Walt? Walt or Anubis… uh, Walnubis? Does that work? OW!

Sorry, that was me. My wife just threw a shoe -hey, that rhymes!- at my head because apparently calling someone that is worse than the curse -hey, I rhymed again!- of feeding them to Ammit the Devourer (I still refuse to call him Poochiekins). Oops, I got off topic again. Like I was saying, I hope Sadie's well. I hope the same for her brother, of course, and I do wish I could still be alive to look out for them. *sighs* But at least they have each other… yes, that is a blessing indeed.

Could you do me a favour, though? Could you all watch over them, make sure they're happy and living the life they deserve? It would mean so, so much to me if you did, but of course, that's your decision.

Thanks even if you don't do it,

Osiris/Carter and Sadie's Dad/Julius Kane

P.S. Oh, I nearly forgot. Tell Walnubis *ducks shoe* that if he dares touch my daughter, I'll kill him! *smiles* Okay? Okay. I'd say the same for Zia but well… lets just say the saying hell hath no wrath like a woman scorned is true. Trust me, I'd know- I rule the underworld, after all.

How was it? Did I get his character okay? Tell me in your REVIEWS!