Chapter 32. Hope you guys enjoy! There are a lot things happening in this one. Important things. Every character is introduced for a reason you know. Anyways. Have fun reading and thank you so so so much for all your wonderful reviews. I take everything you say into consideration and if you have any questions or suggestions, don`t be afraid to ask. Happy reading.

That morning, after I had called Jim and told him I couldn`t work for him anymore, my mom drove me down to the council building. She was only speaking to me when she needed to. Giving me only the bare minimum in information. After she dropped me off she told me that whenever she couldn`t be at home with me I was to be at Sam and Emily`s place.

"But mom! I`m not a kid! I don`t need babysitting!" I protested. How embarrassing.

"I`ll decide that." She snapped. "Once you start acting like an adult I`ll treat you like one."

She dropped me off outside and told me that I would be going home with Sam as she was going out with Michael for dinner.

"I need a stiff drink after the hell you put me through yesterday." She said as I got out. Making me feel a mixture of angry, jealous that she was spending so much time with Michael, and guilty for making her feel bad.

With legs that felt heavier than my heart, I climbed the couple of steps to the main door of the wooden building. There were a few people buzzing around inside the reception area. I looked back out the door. I could see the ocean, foamy waves churning and crashing onto James Island, the ancient burial ground of our Chiefs long dead.

"Don`t even think about making a run for it." A serious voice came from behind me.

"Hey Sam." I said meekly as I turned around to face him. He looked so disappointed. Annoyance and guilt struggled for dominance inside of me. Why is it that when I fuck up I fuck up bad?

"Come on. You`ve got work to do." He ordered, not even bothering to say hello.

"What am I supposed to be doing?" I asked, trying to match the speed of his stride, but Sam seemed determined to keep a distance between us, like I was some rotting fish or something.

"You`ll be doing social visits."

"Huh?"

"We are assigning you an elder to visit and keep company. Do chores for."

"Okay." Didn`t sound so bad. Old people tended to like me a lot. "Who?"

"Mr. McBride." Sam said solemnly.

"Old man McBride?" No! Please not him! He was the crankiest old boot on the rez. A real loner. Even the dogs were scared of him.

"Mr. McBride." Sam stressed, looking a little smug.

"Fine. So...what now? I mean. Is he here? Am I supposed to bring him home or something?"

"He`s at home. He doesn`t leave his house anymore. I`m going to bring you there as soon as we collect his meds and pick up some cleaning stuff."

"How long to I have to stay with him?"

"Four hours every Saturday and Sunday. Doing whatever needs to be done basically. You can cook right?"

"Yes. I suppose I`ll be making his meals too." I grumbled.

"You are. You will be helping out an old man Sonia. Some one who can`t get by as well as they used to so be more conscientious. Would you rather be scrubbing out the fishing boats?" Sam asked angrily.

"Whatever punishment you deem fits my crime." I answered back cheekily. Sam looked boot faced.

"You could have been hurt." Sam said.

"Well I wasn`t."

"You could have been! We were all so worried. Jacob was frantic! Your mom too! Edward is the enemy."

"So why are you helping him?"

"Helping him what?"

"With Bella Sam."

"Jealousy is really ugly Sonia."

"I`m not jealous of her!"

"You are. I can get why though. You...you don`t need to do stupid things to get Jacob`s attention. I know things haven`t been good with the two of you for the past couple of months, I know things are hard right now, but believe me, Jacob thinks about you all the time."

"He has a funny way of showing it. Showing Bella off around the rez like some prize." I said bitterly.

"You are the prize. Anyway Sonia. I thought you told Jacob to give you some space."

"I did."

"But you didn`t really mean it."

"I did mean it!"

"You were never this insecure before. Bella has nothing on you."

"Jacob seems to think the contrary."

"I`m going to give you some advice. You can listen or not, that`s entirely up to you. You are obviously still in love with Jacob, no point trying to deny it. Jacob...Jacob is still confused about his own feelings though, having Bella around constantly is dredging up old memories, old feelings. What I`m saying is, Christ this is difficult, what I want to say is to just...let it go."

"Let it go?" I asked in a whisper. Sam knew. Jacob doesn`t love me anymore. Hearing it from another person...oh God...

"Sonia. I`m being honest with you. Realistic. You can`t force love. No matter how much you love someone...how hard you want them to love you back...you can`t force their heart."

"But I`m his imprint." I said a bit pathetically.

"You are." Sam said gently. "You will always be. But I don`t think now is the right time for the two of you. It`s not the right time for romance. Jacob...Jacob should have never started that type of relationship in the first place. He loves you Sonia, so much. He desires you and he wants you, but he is still in love with Bella. It`s something you can`t change. Jacob just has to grow out of it."

"Yeah, so...we need to get some meds right?" I asked in a daze. Sam looked at me like I was nuts.

"You heard with I said right?" He asked carefully.

"I heard you...believe me. I heard. Not much I can do about it now right? I just have to...leave him be. With Bella."

"I`m sorry."

"Don`t be. It`s okay. It`s all cool. Hunky dory." Oh God Oh God Oh God. It felt as if my heart had shattered into a million tiny little pieces. A sense of horrible loss washed over me. Loss and acceptance. I never truly believed it until I heard it come from Sam`s lips. Jacob doesn`t love me.

"I`m sorry if I was a bit rough on you. It`s the truth though. Jacob should have been man enough to tell you instead of just letting it hang in the air between the two of you. You deserve much better Sonia."

"How can I...how can I get over this if I`m stuck here all the time?"

"That was your mom`s decision. I can`t do anything about that."

"I don`t mean that. I mean...forget it. So. Mr. McBride."

Sam drove me out to Mr. McBride`s place just on the edge of the rez. It was an old house. One of the small wooden ones they used to build that nowadays it would be classified as a shed.

"Why doesn`t the council move him into one of the new ones?" I asked Sam.

"He refuses to leave it. I had a look around before. No heating. The roof leaks in places. But I suppose he`s happy here. Content."

"What if he refuses my help?"

"He won`t. He needs some companionship."

"Thanks for making me feel guilty Sam."

"I didn`t mean to. I know he`s gruff. Just grin and bear it."

"Okay."

"I have some food Emily has made in the trunk. It should last him a couple of days. But from now on you`re responsible for his grocery shopping."

"Okay...lets get the show on the road." I said as Sam parked the car and unload two huge coolers full of food. Sam rapped on the door.

"Mr. McBride?"

"Who is it now?" An agitated voice came from inside.

"Sam and Sonia."

Mr. McBride came to the door. His skin was a sickly grey color and his hair was snow white. Bent over, he walked with a craved walking stick. The place smelled like old. Old wood, old furniture, old people. Musty. Damp.

"Tell those fussy old women down at the council that I don`t need any help."

"This is Sonia. She is going clean and cook. Nothing more. If you don`t like her then we can find some one else." Sam spoke calmly. Mr. McBride studied me with his beetle black eyes. Funny that for a man so old, his eyes looked so young, alive, not clouded or yellow like other old peoples.

"Sonia. You seem familiar."

"Maybe you knew her grandmother. Hannah Mara."

"Used to be Hannah Uley? I knew her. Died didn`t she?"

"Eh yeah...two months ago almost." I said awkwardly. Sam looked like he wanted to flee.

"But`s that not why you seem familiar. Who was your father?" He questioned. Still not letting us into his house. I looked at Sam before I answered.

"Robert Gleeson." I answered dumbly. I hadn`t said that full name in a long time. It sounded so alien coming out of my mouth.

"The boy who robbed the bank?" I cringed inwardly.

"It was a gas station." I defended. Bank sounds so much worse.

"Humpf. So they send the bastard daughter of an armed robber to clean my house and steal my things? Go away! Both of you!" He sooed us away with his hands and made to close the door but Sam stuck his giant foot in so he couldn`t. Both men looked so angry.

"We are not going anywhere until you apologize to Sonia." He said threateningly.

"You can`t tell me what to do young man. Don`t think I`m intimidated by your height and your girth." Mr. McBride pointed at him with his walking stick.

"Apologize!" Sam growled.

"It`s okay Sam. I should really get started you know. I don`t know if my four hours started when he opened the door or when I get to cleaning." I said calmly, opening the door and brushing past Mr. McBride and into his dark house.

"Where do you think you are going young lady?" Mr. McBride blustered. Clearly shocked.

"Sam. Can you get the rest of the stuff from the car?"

"Sonia. You don`t have to stay here!" Sam said.

"I want to. I have to see what valuable things there are for me to steal you know."

Both Sam and I were shocked to find that Mr. McBride started to laugh.

"You have spirit. I`ll give you that."

"Sonia. Come on. We can find another elder who will appriciate your help more."

"I like this one. He`s honest. They will all be thinking the same thing you know. Just afraid to say it out loud."

"If you`re sure."

"I am."

"You can stay for today." Mr. McBride said, walking over to a mouldy old arm chair and collapsing into it. "Just don`t disturb me when my show is on or you`re out on your ear."

"Yes Sir." I said, winking at Sam, who was shaking his head and smiling.

The house, as I had guessed, was a mess. Not so much with dirt, but with the general state of it. It was leaky, cold, and smelly. In the kitchen, when I was cleaning out the cupboards, I discovered and old flask. When I opened it the biggest mother fucker of an ugly centipede came crawling out onto my hand. I vomited outside and onto the grass. Mr. McBride kept to himself in front of the TV. Every so often he would pop his head into the tiny kitchen to see what I was up to.

After three hours, with Herculean effort, I got the kitchen ship shape. Well almost. I scrubbed away all the years of dirt and grime. Washed all the pots and pans, plates, cutlery until they gleamed. Threw away all the out of date food. And re-potted the window plants. Defrosted the fridge, and when that was done, stocked it up with Emily`s meals. Overall, I was pretty satisfied with my work. It kept my mind from wandering to Jacob. Keep busy is the best solution.

"Humpf." Mr McBride came shuffling into the kitchen in his worn slippers, looking around.

"Happy with it?" I asked, eager for praise.

"You left a huge mark on the window, and the cupboards still look dirty." I was shocked when he shuffled out again. What the fuck? I went to the window and saw a tiny streak, not a huge mark! And the cupboards needed a fresh coat of paint, no amount of scrubbing could make them as good as new again.

Muttering mutinously to myself, I refilled the bucket with warm soapy water and decided to tackle the bathroom for my last hour. Stupid old man! You would think he would be happy with someone cleaning his house for free! I instantly felt guilty though, for my horrible thoughts, when I saw the bathroom.

It was small, dingy. Mr McBride had his washing hung on a make shift line over the bathtub and some shirts and jumpers soaking in the sink in smelly water. Under the mirror, on the shelf was a comb, an old tin mug with an ancient toothbrush, a rusted razor and a tin of old brillcream.

My heart bled. How could I have been so cruel about a defenseless old man? It looked as though he was trying his best to take care of himself but the years were getting to him. I sighed as I let the water drain from the sink. He doesn`t even have a washing machine. I decided to do whatever laundry he needed doing over at my place in the future. For my last hour there I hand washed his clothes and satisfied that I had rinsed them well, hung them up to dry.

"Mr. McBride?" I asked, when I heard Sam`s car pull into the drive way.

"Humpf?" He responded, not taking his eyes off the news channel.

"I`m going now."

"Humpf."

"There`s food in the fridge and wood by the back door."

"Humpf."

"See you next week then."

"Humpf."

"Humpf." I responded back and left.

"So, how`d it go?" Sam asked sceptically.

"Alright I suppose. Didn`t give me any hassle."

"Do you want to go back to him next week?"

"Strangely enough, I do. I mean, I know he`s a grumpy old man but..."

"You feel sorry for him." Sam finished, smiling a little.

"Yeah, I do. He has no one. He`s all alone. You should have seen it Sam. That place is so cold! He washes his clothes in the sink! He should be taken better care of."

"The tribe doesn`t have that much money Sonia. Plus, he has refused to be moved a lot of times."

"I suppose."

"I understand though. It`s hard seeing a person live that way. But, it`s his own choice."

"Yeah."

"Come on. Buck up. You can relax over at my place now."

"I have a load of homework to do." I said sullenly.

When we got to Sam`s I camped out at the kitchen table to do my homework. Quil and Embry wandered in and out. Being polite and not overly friendly. Emily was forgiving. She understood what I was feeling, what I was going though. She piled me with quiche and salad and even helped with my maths.

"Hey Emily, hey Sonia." Both of us looked up and over at Jacob. He was followed in by Sam and Paul.

"Hey girls." Sam said.

"Hey!"

Emily jumped into Sam`s arms and they started to make out, which was gross. Bitter that I couldn`t kiss Jacob, I concentrated on my Spanish homework.

"Can I talk to you." Jacob asked, sitting beside me. I ignored him.

"Please Sonia." He asked again. "It`s important."

I looked up at Paul, Emily and Sam looking at me expectantly and a bit awkwardly.

"Fine." I got up and went outside. Jacob followed me out.

"How did your mom take it."

"You already know." I said bitterly.

"Listen...I know what Sam told you today." He looked shifty and quite guilty. "And I want to set the record straight. I...me and Bella. Today...we decided to get together."

"Get together?" I asked, starting to get scared. I swallowed down a hard lump in my throat.

"I mean...we are going out now." He said carefully. NO no no no no. This can`t be happening.

"As in boyfriend and girlfriend?"

"Yes. We are dating now."

"No...no! She`s going out with Edward."

"They`re finished. She came to her senses."

"What...what about us? We...we are imprinted." I felt like I was having a heart attack. Panic was kicking in. This couldn`t be happening! It can`t be happening.

"You will always be my imprint. I`ll always be there for you Sonia."

"I hate you! I HATE YOU!" I screamed at him. "You`ve ruined my Goddamn life!"

"Stop it! You broke up with me!"

"I did! But I never gave up on you! I never stopped believing in you." I screamed.

"You cut me off."

"I needed time! You could have waited." I wailed.

"I`m sick of being punished by you. I make one mistake and you make me pay by ignoring me for over two months!" He growled.

"You hurt me!"

"And you don`t hurt me?"

"Because you hurt me!"

"It`s done Sonia. We`re done."

"No. No! You don`t get to decide when we`re done!"

"Only you can? Bullshit!"

"Then go! Go then! Go to her. Do whatever you want. I`m done caring. But she`ll hurt you though. You know it. And I hope it hurts bad. I hope it cuts you open like a fucking knife!"

"She won`t Sonia." Jacob said, shaking his head.

"She will. You know it too. You`re such a fucking loser. Taking that train wreck on. Good luck. You want me to hate you? Well you have it. I hate you. So go fuck your frigid bitch and feel good about it. I am tired of waiting for you. So, I am going to go out and fuck as many men as I can and feel just as good doing it." He grabbed a fist full of my hair and my arm. I cried out in pain.

"If any man touches you I`ll swear I`ll kill him!" Jacob growled into my face.

"Let go of me! Stop it!" I screamed, clawing at his face with my nails.

"JACOB! LET GO OF HER!" I heard Sam growl out. I was instantly released.

"You have no fucking right to me Jacob! No right. I`m not your property!" I bellowed before running off sobbing. No no no no. It has happened. I had never truly believed that it would happen. I was always so sure, despite my insecurities, that me and Jacob would end up together.

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