Diary of a Lovable Mad Woman

Harleen Quinzel

Nov. 24th, 20XX

Today was much like yesterday, Petey making breakfast for us girls, Selina and I training with him, and then Peter going out on patrol. Though I reminded him about the talk we were going to have after his patrol. After he left, Kitty and I brainstormed on what the yet to be named persona of Peter's should carry with him.

I asked Selina how long it would take for Petey's identity paperwork to be done. She said she needed more information on him before her contact could come up with something. I told her I would ask.

Finally around 8pm Petey returned home. Since it was a chilly day I made us some hot cocoa and we got comfortable up on the second floor terrace. Once we were comfortable we talked about him. I turned the talk into a session, even recording it on my portable recorder. The entire conversation is on a file in my laptop now, so I can review it over time.

The abridged version was me getting to know about what made him Spider-Man. Most of his origin story I had already heard from Red's interrogation days ago. However his demeanor changed drastically when it came to his first days as a masked man. I know I am a sociopath with violent tendencies, and penchant for causing misery for my own pleasure, but seeing such a lively person, whom I admit to enjoying the company of, disheartened like that, it got to me. I felt like my old self from that point on in the session. A caring compassionate person, hoping to help others, Harleen Quinzel not Harley Quinn. I'm a horrible contradiction, I know, but I like Peter, and much like the Joker before, when he was down, I just wanted to see the smile come back.

His Uncle Ben must have been such a good man, considering how Petey talked about him. He was the source of that saying With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility. The way I see it, professionally of course, Peter is simply horribly guilt ridden, and refuses to relinquish the past. We all make mistakes, so why couldn't he get over that? I want to empathize with him, I really do, but I don't find myself doing it. It's simply a mistake, mistakes happen, why won't he move on? I've killed, orphaned children, created widows, separated entire families...why won't he let it go, it wasn't even his fault, he didn't pull the trigger.

Something inside of me hurt when I came to that rationalization. Some distant part in me wanting to be noticed, I ignored it. Why did I? Oh well. Petey went on to say that it wasn't just his relative that he lost because of his hero side. A woman Gwen Stacy, and her father, both died while he was in costume. Again they were accidents, hazards of the life he chose, and again he refused to let their deaths go. Why?

It was after another couple hours of talking Petey had brightened back up, regaling me about his friends, his last relative his Aunt May, who he was very worried about, and all the capes he fought alongside. I learned he was a high school teacher, photographer, and even scientist in his world. It amazed me how he didn't push for more in his life, living with the bare minimum. He said he wasn't in it for the adulation, he did it all because he had the power to, where others couldn't. I respect him for that, I really do. Though I find myself disagreeing with his path. Maybe...I really am twisted.

Nov. 25th, 20XX

Not much to say today, seems we've already started a routine apparently. Breakfast, train, lunch, Peter goes on patrol. Though I convinced Petey to watch a movie with me later. I really enjoy his company...maybe I really am getting to attached to quickly. I find Red's words coming back more and more. I should probably distance myself...but then again,what the harm in it? Besides, I want to go web slinging again. I didn't fully get to enjoy the last ride.

Nov. 26th, 20XX

Not much to say today again. Kitty said Petey's identity documents would be coming soon, and she finally had a date set for the exchange. We worked on weapon training, and Petey worked on morphing his amazing costume into a suitable version for our outing.

Haven't talked with Red much the past few days, she has become a ghost in her own home.

Nov. 27th, 20XX

We spent a good deal of time today working on a name for Petey's bad guy persona. Surprisingly it was Red who gave him the new name, Tenebrae. I've noticed Peter is getting a bit better at placating Red too. He's getting smarter about how he approaches her, and how to appease her. He actually broke up a rising fight between Kitty and Red, without the seed coming into play. I'm so proud of Petey.

After he left on patrol I decided to talk to Red when Selina left to do some stuff. We got into it almost immediately. She started into me about my relaxed attitude toward "our thrall", as she called Peter. How I'm growing to attached to him again. I wanted to defend him, but I really couldn't come up with anything against her valid argument. He was still and unknown to us, a liability, and could still turn on us in a moment. She threatened to kill him if she felt he was getting to close to me. She refused to let me be hurt and used again.

I snapped at her. I yelled at my best friend, telling her off. It was my decision who I associated with. I was a big girl, and could take care of myself. She had no right to control my life, and that she was being no better than the Joker, by "protecting me" that way. Red was stunned, but quickly lost her temper and told me to get out. I was crying, I didn't want to yell, or hurt her feelings, but she has no right to tell me how to live. I left for hours on a long walk, and just got back. Peter is home already, which is unusual, and is crashed on the couch. He's still breathing too, so Red didn't follow through with her threat yet. I need to apologize to her tomorrow. For now bed, it's been a tiring day.

Nov. 28th, 20XX

I woke up to the smell of coffee. Seriously I think I'm starting to love this guy. We simply had cereal for breakfast, which was perfectly fine with me. He asked why I looked so depressed, and I simply shook my head, hoping he understood I didn't want to talk about it. He got it and told me about his run in with Croc and Batman in the same night. Even the former Boy Blunder was with Bats last night. Apparently he was being very cautious of Spidey. Hee hee, that made me chuckle, thinking he was afraid of sweetheart Peter Parker. Inside I had the largest smile at hoping he'll have a run in with Tenebrae, and see just how much much he should fear sweetheart Peter.

After breakfast I immediately went to apologize to Red. She accepted my apology, and even shocked me by saying "Parker is keeping up his end of the bargain, surprisingly.", without a look of something smelling bad when she said it. It made the rest of my day, which went by in a giddy blur. Especially when I knew tomorrow we get to show off Tenebrae. Ooooohhh it's gonna be so much fun. I can't wait.

Nov. 29th, 20XX

What an exciting night! We got to see the complete Tenebrae costume for the first time, and Petey looked oh so scrumptious in black. I wish he'd wear it more. He was very anxious most of the day, even when he came back from his usual patrol. Red took him aside and said something to him before we left. He had a careful but determined look about him.

It was a slightly tense car ride to the exchange location, A Little Used Book Store. We were meeting The Broker, who actually found us our current hideout. He was gonna buy the information off of us and sell it to the highest bidder. T was to watch our backs, and boy howdy did he. When we got into the store our coms died, and in the matter of minutes we were under attack by Black Mask's goon squad. Broker ratted us out, but I don't blame him, it comes with this line of work. We played around in the store for a while, until the newest Boy Blunder showed up. That only meant one thing, Bats was here. We got outside and wouldn't you know it, T was squaring off with Bats.

OH MY GOD, Petey was so incredibly hot fighting Bats. First he stops those bat boomerangs from hitting both me and Kitty, then he goes toe to toe with him. I could tell Bats was having a tough time too, and I swear I melted when Kitty caught him with her whip. I got to hit him sooooo hard with my hammer. It felt soooo good, almost as good as sex. Unfortunately we were going to get unwanted company quickly and had to leave. Petey stopped me from finishing off Bats, I was annoyed, but I was still riding high.

We ditched the car, and went our separate ways. I got to be all lovey dovey with Petey. After what I just witnessed I was so hot and bothered, I could barely stop myself from taking Peter right then and there. It was his expression that killed the mood, but I won't blame him, even if he shunted my high spirits. He was conflicted by what he had just done, so I just diverted his attention with B.S.. It was a nice long walk in the quite snowy night, and it felt good being alone with Pete.

We were back to a good mood when we got home. Of course it wouldn't last, as Red and Kitty were at each others throats when we arrived. Red was pissed because Selina put me in danger. Peter stepped up to the plate, and calmed her down, even though he was hurt doing so. I normally like to see Red at work, but this didn't feel right. He convinced her that he would take the heat off of us, and she left to the Garden. Kitty kissed Petey on the cheek...at that moment I felt rather annoyed that she was so close to him, but I made sure to thank him more.

He left to talk to Red, and I was left downstairs with Kitty worrying whether or not he'd come back. Thankfully he did. Kitty left a bit later, I think she wanted to make sure he was okay too, and then it was just me and Petey winding down on the couch with the tv. Like I said an exciting and fun night. I look forward to seeing Tenebrae in action again.

A/N: This is really late, I know it, but life has a way of pushing things aside. Anyways, we have another look into Harleen's mind. I hope you enjoyed. And I have good news to those who read this and it's parent story PP&H: Look forward to tomorrow. Until then, thanks for reading.

TheWickedTruth89: Sorry for the wait again.

im ur misconception: I know, I BETA my own work, and sometimes I miss stuff, but still not to bad. Thanks for enjoying.

Wonderbee31: Glad you did, and all I can say is read on. We will get there.

tjohn9999: Wanda will be covered in later installments, but if you want a quicker version read PP&H.

Book-AddictFF: Thank you, and I know. It's the anticipation that keeps things exciting though.

warfolomei: Thank you, I try to make it both fun and informative.

A: Sorry for the wait.

EroSlackerMicha: Here you go.