"Mulder, come out of the closet," Scully repeated for the third time, but Mulder still ignored her.

"Thank God Genia's not here," she sighed. "If she heard what I'm saying to you, she would turn you into a homosexual!"

Scully had no idea why, but that idea terrified her. She didn't want to see her partner with a man, but then again, she didn't like seeing him with a woman, either. His tapes, on the other hand, were not much of a threat. She could handle the tapes.

"Your tapes, Mulder," she smiled. "If you were gay, you would have to replace them. Or maybe you wouldn't? I never actually saw what's on them…"

She wide opened the closet door and stared at a shivering dog who curled himself even further, whining miserably.

"You're in shock," she declared. It was the standard diagnosis that she appointed to Mulder at least twice a week, practically since she'd met him. She wasn't going to change her mode of work just because Mulder was a dog now, but she did offer him a treat instead of a blanket this time.

"I'm sorry, Mulder," she sighed, getting down on the floor. Mulder approached her carefully, sniffed the treat and took it, chewing it without looking at her, ready to return back in the closet at even the tiniest sign of her rage.

"It's my fault," Scully told him gently. "I shouldn't have left you alone. This must be scary for you and I keep forgetting that you are a dog."

She kept forgetting that he was human, too, but she didn't tell him that.

Finally, Mulder relaxed and placed his head on Scully's lap, enjoying her petting.

"I'm going to ask my mom to stay with you tomorrow," she promised. "Or would you rather I take you to her place?"

Mulder ignored her.

"My mom, Mulder," Scully repeated. "You like her, don't you?"

Still no response.

"Maggie?" Scully tried, but that didn't get her a reaction either.

"Mrs. Scully?" she tried next. That got Mulder's attention. He raised his head, looked her in the eyes and barked approvingly.

"All right, it's Mrs. Scully then," Scully smiled and Mulder barked again, wagging his tail.

"Good boy," Scully smiled and Mulder returned his head to her lap, nudging her hand to keep stroking him. She obliged, enjoying the moment just as much as he did. It felt wrong to call him "boy", but how was she supposed to call him? Man? Good man? Good Mulder? Good partner? She tried all of those in her head, but each sounded weirder than the previous. Just when she thought their relationship couldn't get any stranger, Mulder got turned into a dog, took advantage of her weakness for dogs, moved into her place (and set on destroying it) and she couldn't even be mad at him. Instead, she was falling in love…

"Married men weren't a good enough challenge for you, Dana?" she silently scolded herself. "Destroying families wasn't enough of a thrill for you? This partnership is the best thing that ever happened to you, don't you dare to destroy it as well!"

She sighed and closed her eyes, getting lost in thought. Mulder definitely showed her another way. He taught her how to get lost in work, and use all that destructive inner energy for something good, like saving lives instead of destroying them, but still, from time to time some handsome sheriff appeared, or sometimes a tattooed guy or sleek writer…

She felt warmth appear between her legs and opened her eyes to find Mulder's nose buried down there, sniffing intensely.

"Mulder, no!" she pushed him away, getting up. Mulder whined, sounding disappointed, even offended.

"Don't give me that look!" Scully scolded him. "And don't try that again! At least not before you're human again…"

Oh God, what is she saying? She left the room hurriedly, hoping Mulder didn't understand her. What possessed her to say such a thing? Not that she would mind… No! Not that she WOULDN'T mind…

Oh God, Dana, just stop THINKING!

Scully busied herself with cleaning while Mulder mated with her pillow. She made a mental note never to allow that pillow back to her bed.

Then she called her mother.

"I don't know, Dana, he's so big," Maggie was hesitant.

"He's gentle and obedient," Scully insisted. "He won't be any trouble."

"Why didn't you get a smaller dog?" Maggie inquired.

Scully sighed. "I guess that should be my third wish."

"What do you mean?"

"Nothing, mom. I'm asking for a favor here, not for your judgement about my choice of men."

"Men?" Maggie was confused. "Who said anything about men?"

"Dogs," Scully corrected herself. "I meant dogs."

"All right, Dana," Maggie finally agreed. "I'll stay with him. Can you at least leave early from work?"

"No, I can't," Scully sighed. "Skinner gets pissed if Mulder and I are both absent."

"Fox? Is he missing again?"

"No. No, he's here."

"With you?"

"Yes. I mean, no! He's… on a vacation."

"I thought Fox doesn't take vacations," Maggie was suspicious.

"His uncle died," Scully said. "Look, I have to go. See you tomorrow?"

"All right, Dana," Maggie agreed. "Take care."

"You too, mom. Love you."

Finally, the conversation was done with. Mulder seemed to be done with the pillow, as well. He was sitting by the door now, holding a leash and looking adorable.

"All right, Mulder," Scully smiled. "Let's go for a walk, and then I'm taking you to a pet store to get some toys for you, so that you can leave my remaining plants alone."

"Woof!" Mulder agreed, dropping the leash in the process. He quickly picked it up again and wagged his tail happily when he realized Scully got the message and was already putting her sneakers on.