Chapter 56: Sorry sorry sorry for the long wait! I had so many ideas for where I`m taking this that it is difficult to write. Anyway, just a couple more chapters left until this part of the story finishes.
Remember to tell me what you think. Happy reading!
"The water is choppy today." Jacob commented as he rowed the canoe the short distance from the beach to James Island. It sure was choppy. The water was churning, green and grey, almost angrily. James Island, or Aka-lat as we used to call it, loomed in the distance, mist surrounding it, giving it an almost haunted appearance. I had only been there once, when Bernie`s older brother Kyle had brought the two of us when we were fifteen. And it was spectacular...the peace...the beauty...the sense of history...It was the perfect place to pledge my love for Jacob...and him for me. I had even gotten him a ring. Not a real wedding ring but a Claddagh ring. A tribute to my much diluted Irish ancestry I suppose. It was tucked away safely in my bra, to be given to him as we said our vows.
"The weather has changed so much since this morning." I said, as I was sprayed with salt water. It was true, the morning had started out so sunny and clear skied, but...it seemed that as soon as we set off the short distance from the harbor to the island the weather had took a turn for the worse. The once blue sky was now an ominous gun metal grey color, the wind was blowing hard and the water made it so difficult for Jacob to paddle. He shouldn`t of insisted he do it all himself but there was no telling him sometimes.
"Yeah, it`s so weird." He said over his shoulder. I watched his muscles work under his drenched t-shirt. So fluid, so strong. I gripped the sides of the canoe with my hands as we rowed over a big wave. Shit...I feel so sick now. At least I could blame the ocean if I got sick and not the sense of dread that was filling up within me with every passing stroke towards the island. There is no turning back now. I want this! I know I do. There is nothing I want more than to commit myself to Jacob forever. But what I want more is for him to commit himself to me. For him to say the words and follow them through. Utlapa be damned, Jacob wouldn`t leave me.
When we finally made it to the shore I got out and stood on shaky legs. The lifejacket felt like it weighed a ton and I hastened to remove it.
"You`re green in the face babe." Jacob dragged the canoe with ease onto the shore before coming over to me. "Pre-wedding jitters?" He asked kindly. I shook my head slowly.
"No...just the trip over." I reassured him, smiling. Wrapping my arms around his neck I hugged him tightly. God I love him so much. "Thanks for doing this Jacob. I know you are still not convinced that it`s a real wedding but...at least we could say that the trip was good right?"
"I am convinced it`s real. Come on! I even wrote some vows."
"You did?" I had tried to but...I had no talent in putting my feelings into words. Everything I had come up with just sounded so lame and corny and embarrassing. I had no idea what I was going to say to him.
"Yep! Got it all down on paper." He smacked his ass jeans pocket. His smile quickly faded though. He was drenched still. "Ah shit!" He groaned as he pulled out a sodden, folded up square of paper. I could see the blue ink had ran.
"Don`t worry."
"I stayed up all night writing that." He pouted and sighed.
"I didn`t write anything." I confessed, looking at the sand. Jacob took my hand.
"It`s okay. Whatever we say will work." He kissed my forehead and led me towards the slope that led to the top of the island. The firs were swaying restlessly in the wind, sending my body into shivers. I was wet through same as Jacob, difference was I didn`t have his body heat. "You`re freezing." His voice was all concern. I shrugged my shoulders.
"I don`t care."
"I do."
"Come on. I mightn`t be wearing a white dress but this is still my wedding day." I said, starting towards the trees. "You can warm me up when we are in our tent."
"Our camping honeymoon." Jacob smiled and walked with me. "I promise you we can go somewhere sunny when we graduate."
"When you are with me I don`t care about the weather." I didn`t add how we could afford to pay for such a holiday. When we graduate we are going to live together. Community college and then babies. I could maybe teach dance and Jacob could be a mechanic or a fisherman like his dad was.
"Me neither." Quick as a flash he scooped me up and held me in his arms bridal style.
"Jacob! My legs work you know."
"I know. I just wanna take care of you today. Keep you warm and whatnot." He smiled and held me closer. He was warm. So snuggly. "Let me carry you?"
"Sure...you can carry me." I replied, snuggling my head into his neck. The shivers began to melt away in his warm embrace. "You are always so warm."
"One of the perks of being a wolf I suppose. You are warm too."
"Not as warm as you."
"The imprints always feel warm for the imprinters."
"Why did you never say so before?"
"Dunno. Never thought about it really. It`s just something that`s there." He smiled down at me.
"Huh..." I trailed off. Funny how the rustle of the leaves in the wind almost sounds like whispering. Like a hundred different voices speaking at the same time. For a split second I thought I heard my nana. I still missed her. I wished she could still be alive to see me get married. I looked up at Jacob. He was frowning, looking up into the sky. Did he hear something too?
"Just a little bit farther babe." He held me tighter to him as he took on a steep climb at a run.
Once we reached the top we sat down on the grass and looked out onto the Pacific. I could hear the rolling waves crash onto the rocks below us and the wind was unrelenting, seemingly blowing from every direction at once.
"We should do this before the water gets too rough." Jacob said, turning me to face him. I nodded, and shifted my position so I was sitting on my knees and not on my ass. How the hell do we start this?
"So..." Jacob laughed nervously which made me laugh along with him. I took his hands.
"Jacob...I thought that...maybe coming here...it would..." I trailed off, not knowing how to finish. Jacob covered my trembling hands with his own.
"It would be a commitment Quileute style. I know why you wanted to come here the second we reached the top and looked out over the ocean. Because this place..." He looked around and then rested his eyes on my own. "It`s sacred." I smiled shyly at him before fishing his ring from my bra.
"What are you doing?" Jacob asked, confused and a bit shocked. I rooted around in my bra some more before finding it.
"Getting your ring." I held it tightly in my fist.
"You got me a ring?" He asked quietly.
"Yes. It`s not a wedding ring...more like a commitment ring." I took his left hand in my own. "It`s a Claddagh ring." I showed him the ring cupped in my hand. "The hands represent friendship. The heart, love and the crown is loyalty." I courageously took his hand and placed the ring on his ring finger, making sure the crown was pointing towards his knuckle. I looked into his eyes and made myself hold contact. "All the things I can offer you...everything I am...you will always have. Because...because the moment you imprinted on me...I loved you. There was never any question about that. So...I want to be your wife. I want to share your life."
I finished. Heart hammering I pushed the ring up his finger and let out a shuddering breath. Jacob took my hands and kissed them. Oh man...does this mean he`s my husband now?
"That was beautiful...the most wonderful thing I could ever hear." He said in ernest.
"I sounded so lame."
"No! There was nothing lame about that. It was beautiful. You don`t ever have to hide your feelings from me Sonia. I`m not the same jackass I was before."
"I know you`re not."
"And this is for you." He pulled out a silver bracelet. The one that I chose in the jewelers that day. Attached to it was a tiny little wooden wolf. He gently took my hand and fastened the bracelet around my wrist. I fingered the wolf.
"Did you whittle this yourself?" It was perfect. So realistic. The wood was a red-brown. The same color as Jacob`s wolf. "I love it." I smiled widely at him.
"You do? Great! It took me ages to do. Think of it like a mini-me." I giggled and kissed him.
"Thank you."
"I already gave you the engagement ring so this...it`s also giving you everything I am...everything I have...it`s all yours. I`m yours. You`re my number one. I promise to always be there for you. I promise to protect you from anything that`s stupid enough to try to harm you. I promise to give you everything and anything you need. And...I`ll love you forever. I want to be your husband."
And we finished our little ceremony with a kiss. A kiss that, for me, felt like it made way with the earth underneath me, it felt like I was floating, and the only thing I could hold onto was Jacob. It felt like everywhere his flesh touched mine I had been burnt with a searing heat. The wind was howling all around us, a heavy rain now pelting us as we clung onto each other. Never let go...I will never let go of him.
"Do you think it will rain again?" I asked Jacob as he added another log to our little fire. Our wet clothes were drying on a make-shift rack beside it.
"It always rains here." He replied simply. He turned around and smiled at me, his white teeth shone brightly in the moonlight.
"But what are your wolfy senses telling you?" I wrapped my arms around him from behind and rested my cheek against his warm, bare back.
"My wolfy senses are telling me that my bride is wanting to have another round of honeymoon sex." He lent back and pressed me gently into the sleeping bag I was sitting on.
Resting himself on top of me I was blanketed by his heat. He was the happiest I had ever seen him since we left the island. Brushing back his thick hair I kissed him gently.
"This was the best idea ever Sonia." He peppered my face with kisses.
"So it took the trip to the island to finally convince you?" I asked playfully.
"It did actually." He lent down some more and nuzzled my neck.
"Mmmm...Jacob?"
"Mmm?" He said from my neck.
"When...when we graduate...we can have a church wedding if you want."
"That would be cool. For our friends and family and whatever."
"And...do...do you want kids?" Jacob stopped kissing my neck and looked down at me.
"Kids? Are...are you..." He stuttered out, looking terrified.
"No! I`m not pregnant!" I squealed. Jacob breathed out a huge sigh of relief.
"Don`t scare me like that!" He laughed. "I mean...if you were I would be happy but I have like no job. No money..."
"It`s okay Jacob. I`m on the pill remember."
"I know I know." He shook his head a couple of times. "I do want kids. But when I have a job."
"I don`t think there is a right time to have kids." Well...that`s what my mom says anyway. Jacob regarded me.
"Do you want a baby? Like...now?" He didn`t sound freaked out...just a little unsure. Did I?
"Not now." I shook my head. What a liar I am. I actually had no idea where this urge for a baby was coming from. Well...if I was being honest with myself...I knew it would be another way to bind Jacob to me...and that was totally unfair to both Jacob, the baby and myself. It was that fear again...that horrible black terror that poisoned my heart, telling me that my time was running out with him...that this would be the last chance I get for getting pregnant.
I really was my own worst enemy. We just got married. Jacob was here with me. Finally happy. Were were soulmates. He was never going to go. I should just take mom and Sue`s advice and ignore what is happening.
Losing track of my black thoughts as Jacob shed my clothes I surrendered myself to his tender caresses and touches. I could swear that every time we made love was different. Every time felt like the first time all over again. It was like he found new places to touch, like we discovered new ways to bring each other pleasure. I closed my eyes as Jacob entered me, taking one last look at the navy night sky. If this was what marriage was like then I`m sure I`m going to love it.
"How was your camping trip?" My mom asked me and Jacob as we came home on Sunday evening. I dumped my backpack in the hall and hugged her.
"Great." I told her.
"The best." Jacob said as he took my hand and squeezed it. Mom looked to me and then to Jacob, her smile not quite reaching her eyes. She suspected something but telling her would be more trouble than it`s worth at the moment. I was still a minor...she could tell me what to do for another two months.
"That`s good. The weather was terrible though. You should have waited." She said, crossing her arms.
"It was just a camping trip mom. Plus, the weather is bad all the time." I pointed out.
"If you get a cold don`t start complaining to me." She made a point of looking at her watch. Jacob coughed awkwardly.
"I suppose I better go. Sam will want me to patrol soon." He said almost sadly. I held his hand tightly, not wanting for him to go now. "I`ll see you tomorrow Sonia." He said reassuringly. By tomorrow he meant tonight I hope. Sam will be having him double shifts for all the time he spent away. Plus...he totally hadn`t forgiven me for all that shit I said about him and Leah.
"I`ll see you at school." I gave him a lingering kiss before he left. I so didn`t want him to go.
"Night sweetheart. Goodnight Ms. Mara."
"Goodnight Jacob." My mom said curtly.
Once the door was closed I was expecting to get an earful from her. I didn`t exactly ask for her permission to go on the camping trip, I just told her I was going. And I told her that I would be back on Saturday night. But Jacob and I wanted more time together alone...and it kinda slipped my mind that I should call her or something.
"You should put your dirty laundry in the machine before you forget about it. I don`t want to find any more mouldy clothes rotting away in some plastic bag." She said, in such a normal voice that I was taken totally aback. I was preparing myself for one of her screaming tirades.
"I`ll do it now mom."
"I have your pj`s warming on the radiator in your room. They should be nice and warm after you have your shower." She said, shaking out my raincoat and hanging it up.
"Thanks mom." Wow...
"No problem." She said kindly, giving me another hug.
"I`m sorry I didn`t call you and tell you I was staying another night. It just slipped my mind."
"Don`t worry. I knew you would be safe." She released me. "Just don`t do it again."
"I won`t. I promise." I picked up my backpack and made for the kitchen.
Once I dumped all my dirty clothes inside the washer I had my first shower since Friday morning. I didn`t want to think about how much I must have stank. Leaving the conditioner in for a couple of minutes I soaped and scrubbed myself vigorously. Oh man...I`m married...I have a husband! I`m somebody`s wife! Laughing out loud I rinsed my hair. Who would have guessed? Me. Sonia Chevosi Mara. Married. To Jacob friggin' Black.
Would I have to start acting like Emily? The native Martha Steward. Or like Kim? Sweetheart and stay at home mom. I should really start learning to look after myself properly now. If me and Jacob were going to live together then I needed to get a job. I also needed to start thinking properly about my future in dance. As much as I hated to admit it...there was no schools or companies near here that I could join. The closest would be in Seattle and that was way to far to commute to. Maybe I could be a teacher at my school in Port Angeles? But whatever...things would work out one way or another.
When I got out of the shower and drying off in my room I noticed a small white envelope on top of a stack of textbooks on my desk.
Sonia Gleeson
It said in flowing silver calligraphy. Who the fuck sent me this? Why were they using my Dad`s surname? I opened the envelope.
Isabella Marie Swan
and
Edward Anthony Mason Cullen
Together with their families
Request the honor of your presence
At the celebration of their marriage
Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think. Besos.