He wasn't sure what compelled him to head back. What had drawn him to walk to the city that he despised, simply because it was home to a itch he couldn't scratch. A nuisance in his life that he wanted to get rid of.
However, this tick on his pelt might be the only one who can give him answers.
Staring up at the apartment complex, his eyes grazed along the large window of the penthouse on the higher floors. He groaned, fixing his shades and shoving his hands into his pocket as he pushed his way through the front door.
The rhythmic click of his shoes echoed through the lobby as Shizuo headed towards the elevators. He passed by the front desk, not bothering to stop to ask which floor he needed. Shinra had told him earlier that day when he called. The doctor had asked why Shizuo wanted to know, but the blonde hung up before he was asked any more questions.
He stepped into the elevator, pressing the button he needed, and leaned against the wall as the doors closed. Closing his eyes, he felt his stomach flip from the initial lift of the elevator, and perhaps something else bubbling in his gut. It was odd, not being driven by anger or bitterness. His questions and concerns were the driving forces that lead him to this place.
Reaching into his pocket, Shizuo feels the thin leather wallet that dig into his hip. He breathes a steady breath as the elevator shoots up, shaking slightly from the speed.
Months ago, he would have thought this was crazy. That even considering coming here for any reason other than a plot to squash the flea was stupid. But now, with time ticking away so fast, he had nothing to lose.
What did he have left? Pride? Strength? Not really. All he had left were questions he demanded to have answers to.
The blonde opened his eyes and watched the numbers on the wall climb up as the elevator slowly came to a stop, and the doors opened. With a strong posture, he steps out and smoothly strides down the hall.
It didn't take long for him to be standing in front of the informant door. He had walked to this spot many times in the past. Most times, Izaya was never home. He learned that the hard way when he first decided to pay the informant an unpleasant visit. He had kicked down the door and stormed in, to be greeted by an alarm and security dragging him away.
This time, he didn't just barge in. But he didn't knock either. Of course, what was he supposed to do? Knock and say "Honey, I'm home!" Izaya would never open up the doors to him anyways. And Shizuo was sure that pest had security cameras around the place. He wouldn't be surprised if Izaya was already aware he was here.
So he just stood there awkwardly, not really sure what to do next. Barge in? Knock? Pound on the door demanding Izaya open up?
It was weird visiting your enemy when you were about to ask for his services.
The lock clicked, and the knob jiggled a bit, causing Shizuo to step back. The door opened, and a woman was standing in the doorway. The blonde blinked a bit as the woman glared at him, eyes glazed over with bitterness.
"Ah…"
"Shizuo Heiwajima."
Shizuo coughed, "Uh, yeah. How'd-"
"Doesn't matter how I know your name." the woman hissed as she waved her hand in the air before crossing her arms over her rather large chest. "If you're here for an appointment, just go inside. Of course, I know you're not. If you had arranged one, I would have spoken with you over the phone. But I was expecting you to come regardless."
Was this woman like Izaya? And informant?
They stared at each other silently, before she stepped out and pushed past him, "He's preoccupied at the moment. Go in and have a seat. If he asks where I'm at, I'm on my break."
Shizuo watched as he stormed down the hall, her long black hair flowing behind her like a cape as she turned the corner and disappeared.
The door remained open, and Shizuo was sure he heard a shower running in the background as he hesitantly stepped inside. It was strange walking past the threshold in a calm state of mind. Normally, his vision was clouded by red, and he didn't pay attention to the details. But now that he was relatively peaceful, he took in the environment around him.
It was very clean. Something Shizuo would have expected. Everything seemed to be put in it's place. Dust was nearly nonexistent, and there were no dishes or papers lying about. As he stepped further inside, the only thing Shizuo noticed was "messy", was Izaya's desk; papers were strewn about, and a half full tea mug was sitting on the edge near the keyboard.
He walked over to the two computers, only slightly surprised that Izaya owned two desktop computers, and a laptop; all alive and buzzing with information. One was opened up to the Dollars chatroom; which shocked Shizuo. To think that he and Izaya were a part of the same gang…
Shizuo shook his head; Izaya must be a part of it just to cause trouble. That's the only explanation.
The other two computers were opened up to internet browsers, with many tabs opened on each one. Shizuo vaguely scanned over the tabs, reading article titles and e-mail accounts. Things that didn't interest Shizuo, let alone seem important.
One tab did catch his eye. It made his throat close up and his stomach churn as he bent closer to read the small print on the familiar webpage. He took the mouse and scrolled it over the tab, pulling it open so he could read it clearly. And felt his heart drop into his stomach.
The sound of water slowed until it was a steady drip of water from the tap. Stepping out of the shower, Izaya shivered as the cold air wrapped around him.
But he didn't reach for a towel. He quietly stood on the cold tiled floor, shivering slightly as water dripped down his body and pooled at his feet. He stared at the fogged reflection of him in the mirror, examining every blurred curve of his thin frame. Wiping his hand across the glass, streaked droplets of steam smeared away in a stripe the size of his palm. Two red, scrutinizing eyes stared back at him, covered by black hair that clung to his face like ink on canvas. He smiled a bit, and grabbed his towel, wrapping it around his thin waist as he shook out his hair.
He heard the front door close, and snorted as he glanced at the cell phone on the sink counter.
"Always right on time for her break. Tch."
Stepping out of the bathroom, and hissing as the colder air from the hall blew past him, Izaya slipped in ear buds. He listened to a soft song as he walked down the hall, and went into his bedroom. Stretching a bit as a shiver rippled down his spine, he let the towel fall, and pulled on a fresh pair of boxers and a new pair of jeans.
He hummed slightly to himself as he grabbed a red v-neck shirt and tugged it over his still damp hair. His stomach grumbled a bit, making his groan. He had forgotten to eat a lunch with all the work he had. Sighing, he jogged from his room and skipped down the stairs, tugging at the shirt as it clung to his body. On the last step, an ear bud wiggled free, and he heard the shuffling coming from his desk.
He halted and instinctively reached for his jean's pocket, expecting his trusty flick blade to be there. However, he knew that it wouldn't be there. Still, his hand clenched as if he was gripping the hilt, as he and Shizuo stared down each other.
"Izaya I-"
"Breaking and entering is against the law you know. This time I won't have to frame you to put you into jail."
Shizuo walked away from the desk, hands in his pockets and a strange red tint on his cheeks. If Izaya didn't know any better, he would think that Shizuo was flustered. But he knew it was because the brute felt guilty for being caught.
"That lady let me in. The one with the long hair."
"Tch…dammit Namie. Never listens to me."
Oh, so that was her name.
"Get out of my house." Izaya sneered, as he pulled the ear buds from his ears and hung them around his neck. Shizuo shook his head, sighing as he took off his glasses and folded them into his breast pocket.
"I have a reason why I'm-"
"I know. And I refuse to help the likes of you. Out."
"Izaya, won't you li-"
"You weren't invited, nor did you have an appointment."
Shizuo growled under his breath and pinched the bridge of his nose and Izaya continued to shoot him down and cut him off. "God dammit Flea, I came to actually…" he choked a bit as the words got stuck in his throat.
Izaya laughed, sauntering over smoothly toward his desk, picking up the cold coffee mug and a few stray papers from his desk, reading over them quickly. "Came to do what, exactly? Kill me? You're not too hard to predict, Shizu-chan."
"I came to pay for your services."
The informant blinked slowly as the words sunk in. He smile graced his lips and he laughed again, waving the hand holding the coffee cup in small circles. "Ahh, Sorry Shizu-chan. But I don't work in that field. Despite contrary belief, I don't try to get involved with hookers."
Shizuo coughed and slammed his hand on the desk, "Not like that! You fuckin sick bastard."
Izaya chuckled a bit and gestured toward the door as he passed Shizuo into the kitchen, "Then, please leave. The door is right there. Or would you rather crawl back under the bed like the monster inside you wants, hmm?"
Shizuo grunted and pulled out his wallet, throwing the flimsy leather at Izaya. It hit the informant in the chest, and fell to the ground with a pitiful plop. Izaya stared at it, brow raised incredulously.
"You really serious about this?" he scoffed and shook his head, kicking the wallet away from him, "You couldn't even afford ten minutes talking to me."
Shizuo shrugged, and looked away, feeling smaller than he already felt. "I know. But this is important. Besides, I have more questions now."
"After snooping in my personal space?"
"Yeah, pretty much."
Izaya clucked his tongue and rolled his eyes, "Fine. One question. That's it." he bent down and pulled out the cash from Shizuo's wallet, stuffing the few bills into his back pocket. "Then, you leave."
Shizuo groaned, and ran his fingers through his hair as he thought hard about what he wanted to ask. He knew what he wanted to blurt out. But knowing Izaya, he would answer vaguely, and then kick him out. He wasn't going to risk that.
He glanced back at Izaya's desk, staring at the glowing reflection on the windows that showed what was on the screen. That same web page he had grown so used to staring at for hours on end the past month. The blonde took a deep, shaky breath, and slowly and carefully chose his words.
"I noticed that you were logged onto a website that I was familiar with, and you had said you knew who Psyche was. I'm wondering why you were associated with him, where he went, and why he sent me that letter."
Izaya narrowed his eyes, and crossed his arms, "That's three questions."
"No. That was one question with three parts. You never put a placement on how many parts there were to the question."
"Tch…stop trying to play mind games with me."
"Then fuckin answer my question and I won't have to!"
Izaya grit his teeth and turned around to open the front door, standing still with his back toward Shizuo as he held the door open. "That is a question I cannot answer."
Shizuo felt rage bubble up in him, forcing him to stomp forward the grab Izaya by the shoulder roughly and slam him into the wall. The force reverberated against the wall, causing the few pictures on the wall to rattle. Izaya's head slammed against the wall, causing him to bite his tongue as he regained a cool composure. Shizuo growled and bent forward the pin the informant between his arms.
"Fucking flea, you're gonna answer me."
Izaya grinned deviously, looking up at Shizuo through his bands that still dripped water into his eyes. One might think the informant was crying. Only a fool would think that though.
"What if I told you I didn't want to answer your questions?"
"Like that would fucking matter? Not like you respect what other's want, why should I respect what you want?"
Izaya shrugged a bit, "Because it's a topic I'm no longer interested in." He smiled and ran a fingertip along Shizuo's arm, chuckling. "Although, seeing you so desperate for answers is satisfying, so I'll be nice. Just this once. Because it'll be so amusing to see your little heart shattering when you learn the truth."
Shizuo squeezed harder, creating a mark on the brunette's thin and pale shoulder, "Then start talking."
"I know more about your affair with him than you can even imagine. I know every detail of your relationship. And I know that he isn't as kind and loving as you thought. That he is someone you would hate and want to destroy if you knew him better." Izaya felt his pride boost up when the grip on his shoulder loosened a bit, and Shizuo's eyes flickered with disgust.
"I knew him better than you."
"That's what you think, Shizu-chan. But I know his true face. I know his true heart. I know you would hate him if you knew who he was. It's probably best if don't keep searching for him."
"Flea. Stop skipping around the answer. Tell me right now, where is Psyche?"
Izaya sighed, "You weren't meant to become infatuated with him." The words rung in Shizuo's ears, and a slow feeling of understanding started to crawl into his heart. A sick twisting in his stomach made his grip loosen completely. "So I broke all ties between you two. I won't lie when I say I'm glad it hurts. But it's for the better, right? Of course, with him not paying for your medication anymore, you might just die faster now."
Shizuo trembled and squeezed his eyes shut, gritting his teeth, "Shut up."
Izaya grinned with satisfaction and leaned forward, slipping out from Shizuo's grip. He stepped closer, pressing his lips close to Shizuo's ear as he whispered, "I just can't let you see me for who I really am. I don't want you to see that side of me. Forget me, Tsu-chan."