Chapter: 19
Time made no sense to Ichigo. He couldn't tell if it had been five minutes or five days, a second or an hour. He had no idea how long he had been a Hollow or how long he had been normal. Everything blended together in such a confusing and endless fashion.
He was grateful to have Shinji with him to talk him through the pain. Whenever he felt nauseous, which was almost constant, Shinji would rub his back and shush him. It was comforting to have him near. When his body went into convulsions from the intense pain, Shinji would let Ichigo squeeze his hand and tried to distract him from the pain by talking.
Ichigo finally ran out of strength and lay on the ground, flat on his back, and panted. Shinji's voice was distorted and he was seeing three of him. Though he was laying still, he felt as if he were spinning. It was as if someone was tilting the world onto one side, like pulling a rug out from underneath him.
"Ichigo..?"
He turned his head to look at Shinji. He sounded so far away but he was so close he could reach out and touch him.
"Ichigo..?"
Ichigo closed his eyes for a moment. No sooner had he done so did he feel Shinji shaking him.
"I'm worried if you pass out, you'll lose control and become a Hollow again. I can't take you on by myself. Stay with it."
Ichigo nodded his head. "I'm just resting my eyes for a second." He had no strength left in his body. He could no longer move. He was drained of his energy.
He felt Shinji tap him and opened his eyes. He saw Rukia coming closer and set something down beside him. Shinji lifted Ichigo into a sitting position and Rukia held something up to his mouth. He tasted water on his tongue and swallowed. The water felt good on his dry throat. It washed away the burning feeling he felt whenever he tried to swallow. He started drinking eagerly, gulping down the water as fast as he could. He wasn't satisfied yet. He needed more.
"Drink it slowly, Ichigo," Rukia told him. "Slowly. That's it. Slowly."
Ichigo drank every drop of water she offered him and asked for more. She only agreed to give him more if he drank more slowly and took the time to breathe. She helped him drink again. It was a lot like feeding a baby. Ichigo had no strength in his body so he needed someone to hold him up and support his head while Rukia poured the water into his open mouth.
"That's it. Nice and slow. That's right..."
Ichigo started coughing and spat water onto his chest. Rukia took away the bottle and helped Ichigo hunch over to cough and get air into his lungs. She couldn't believe how frail he was. Ichigo was getting weaker.
There wasn't much time.
Ichigo caught his breath. "Thanks, Rukia."
"Don't mention it." Rukia looked at Shinji. "Lay him down."
Ichigo was placed on the ground, his head resting on a bag Rukia had placed behind him. He felt her put a moist cloth on his forehead. She was trying to bring down his fever and rehydrate him. She didn't offer him any food but Ichigo wouldn't have been able to ate any of it anyway. He had no appetite and would have ended up throwing it up.
"What now?" asked Shinji.
"Mayuri still hasn't found a cure yet but he's still working on it."
"Ichigo can't wait much longer. You see how he is."
"I know, I know. But what can we do?"
Ichigo was having a hard time breathing. It felt like he had bricks on his chest. He had no feeling in his limbs so he couldn't move. Something was wrong. He could sense it. He wouldn't be able to maintain this form for much longer.
"Ruki... Shin..." He couldn't speak.
"He's in a bad way, Rukia. I've spent all this time with him and I know what I'm talking about."
"What do you suggest we do?"
"I don't know."
"We can't do anything. Believe me, I want to. But I can't. I don't have answers. All we can do is be there for him and try to make him as comfortable as possible. I just gave him water and that's a big thing. I'm trying to bring down his fever but that's-"
Ichigo started screaming. His body was going into convulsions again. His skin was starting to turn white and a mask was starting to form around his face. He had run out of time.
Rukia and Shinji broke away from him as he transformed. The Hollow was already on the attack and slashed at the two of them.
"Damn," said Shinji. "One second he's weak and we have to take care of him, and the next he's attacking us and we have to fight him."
Once again they were facing a rampaging Ichigo. He roared and fired at cero straight at them.
Knowing he couldn't handle being attacked in his current condition, Shinji and Rukia had to be careful. They didn't want to risk injuring him when he was already in a weakened state. He might not be able to handle it. Every hit counted. The best they could do was dodge.
"You two!"
Rukia and Shinji turned around. Soi Fon was running at them from behind. She had a few members from her Squad following her shadow.
"Get away from him!" Soi Fon ordered.
Reluctantly, the two stepped away as her Squad moved in. They formed a circle around Ichigo and started to perform Kido to keep him restrained. Ichigo raged and roared. The Kido didn't hold him for long. He broke his bonds and they formed new ones to hold him in place. Ichigo soon broke those as well.
"Captain Soi Fon-"
She held up her hand to Rukia. "You left without proper permission from your Captain. Do I need to tell you what that means?"
"I know it's something I shouldn't have done and I will probably receive punishment for it when I return."
"Probably?"
"But Captain Soi Fon, please understand... I had to be with Ichigo. He needed help. He managed to change back to normal and I was bringing him water. He's running a fever and I just-"
"Don't whine to me about it," snapped Soi Fon. "I understand that you were trying to help him, but this... This is not..." Soi Fon couldn't form the words.
Even while reprimanding Rukia, Soi Fon knew why she had taken action without orders and came to help a friend. Honestly, she was more upset at Rukia putting herself in danger with Ichigo being as unpredictable as he was.
"More importantly," Soi Fon continued, "we need to keep tabs on everyone in the Seireitei. We can't have too many people out here. The enemy could take this opportunity to attack the Seireitei while we're out here dealing with Ichigo. Did you stop to think of that?"
"I did," said Shinji.
"The more people we have out here, the less we have defending the Seireitei. We need to know where you are. We also have to keep track of the body count. The enemy could kidnap someone or worse. Don't have us running around in a panic."
"I'm sorry-"
"Most of all, Ichigo is unpredictable. You going out here to take care of him is foolish. He could kill you. And if you're on your own, no one will know what happened to you or be able to help you should something happen. You are a Lieutenant now. Be smarter about this."
"And yet you're out here," said Shinji. "You just barely recovered from the Quincy and you're out here again? The same day? Give yourself more time to recover. But instead you're out here for revenge. Well, he's not here so you can go back-"
"I didn't come here for revenge. That Quincy needs to be taken care of. He could hurt someone else and he must be stopped before that happens. He's dangerous. You know that. I am not foolish enough to go looking for him for revenge. I know what must be done." Soi Fon looked at Ichigo who had broken his bonds again. "Right now, Ichigo needs to be dealt with. He's a massive danger as well. To himself and others."
Rukia was fearful of what she meant. Soi Fon's words were cryptic. "You're not going to..?"
"We have to contain him. The Head Captain didn't give us permission to eliminate him yet. But..." Soi Fon frowned at Ichigo's monstrous image. "But if he proves too dangerous or kills one of our own... We may have no choice. The Head Captain gave us permission to go all the way should it come to that."
"But Ichigo's already really weak," said Rukia. "If we engage him in battle, his body might not be able to take it. Him being in this state is weakening him and him fighting while like this is only making him weaker. Please consider-"
"I know what I am doing, Lieutenant. Don't question me. I said if it comes to that. As of now we're trying not to kill him."
"But I'm saying that in his weakened state, it won't take much to kill him. Please don't engage. Just avoid him and dodge his attacks. You don't have to attack him." Rukia was worried that any injury he sustained in battle could contribute to his death. Ichigo's body wouldn't be able to handle a real battle. She didn't want to take any risks.
"Captain! He's-" a Soul Reaper yelled.
Soi Fon's men were falling left and right. They couldn't contain him. They tried once again and this time Ichigo sent a shock-wave outward from his core. Soul Reapers went flying from the blast. Rukia was nearly thrown off her feet. Ichigo stood tall and roared. He didn't look weak at all. Soi Fon was confident she could strike him and it wouldn't make a difference.
"On your feet!" Soi Fon shouted to her men. "Don't give him an inch. He'll get tired and that's when he's easiest to take down."
"Take down?" Rukia gasped.
"We won't kill him," assured Soi Fon. "We'll contain him." She gave her men the order. "Move in now!"
"Ma'am!" They hurried in but Ichigo still had some fight in him. He roared and fired a cero at their heads. He slammed his arm into a couple and threw them into the air. Ichigo stomped on the ones on the ground with injuries. Rukia had to help her fellow Soul Reapers. She dashed in and pulled the injured to safety.
"This is ridiculous," muttered Soi Fon. "Making my men look weak..."
More men were sent flying and a few of them were given terrible injuries. She couldn't stand by and let this continue. If Ichigo was still strong enough to send them flying, he had to be weakened further. She would be the one to do it. She had to weaken him so he could be restrained.
"Captain Hirako, I need you to back me up. We're going in before anyone else gets injured."
Shinji was reluctant. He knew Rukia was right in that Ichigo was in a weakened state. Any injury, however minor, could become fatal to him. It was a huge risk, but it was was their only option at this point. It was either that or let more Soul Reapers fall or even get killed. Something had to be done.
Ichigo rounded on the Captains next. He opened his mouth with a growl.
"Here he comes. Get ready."
Shinji nodded.
"You block, I attack."
"Got it."
Ichigo stomped over to them and raised his arm high over their heads. As soon as that arm was blocked, she would aim for Ichigo's stomach. The arm came down and Soi Fon realized that Shinji wasn't going to block. Soi Fon jumped aside as the arm came down right beside her. Shinji and Soi Fon retreated to a safe distance as Ichigo roared.
"What the hell?" Soi Fon shouted angrily. "I had a shot! Why didn't you block like I said?"
Shinji looked confused. "I.. I don't know... I- I- I couldn't."
"Now's your chance!" Soi Fon's eyes were on Ichigo who was aiming at them again. "Block!"
Ichigo's arm came down and Soi Fon was left to block on her own. Ichigo took his other arm and slammed into her from the side. Her feet slid on the dirt but she was still standing.
She turned back to Shinji who had his hand on the hilt of his sword. "Why didn't you block?" she demanded. "Use you weapon!"
"I- I'm trying! But..." Shinji looked down at his sword. "My arm won't let me draw!"
"What?" Soi Fon wasn't buying his excuse.
It wasn't an excuse. It was a fact. Shinji couldn't get his arm to obey him. It was as if it had a mind of its own. It wouldn't let him draw his sword. The hand gripping the handle of his weapon wouldn't budge. No matter how he tried, it wouldn't move.
"What the hell is this?" Shinji wondered aloud. "Why? Why is this happening? Why can't I move my body?"
It had been years since the last time he felt this way. The feeling of having someone else in control of his body.
"I can't let you do that, Pharaoh."
Shinji's breath caught in his throat. He knew that voice. "You. It's you."
"Been a while since we last spoke, hasn't it?"
"You're the one doing this," Shinji growled at his inner Hollow. "Why are you doing this? You haven't interfered in my business in a long, long time. Why now?"
"I can't let you hurt Ichigo. If you do, she will be sad. I can't have that."
"She?" Shinji knew what was happening. "So... it was her. She used her voice on me."
"On us."
"Whatever. The point is this was her doing. No wonder I don't remember ever leaving the meeting. I should have known but I was too hazy to think."
"My sweet little kitten gave me an order. She doesn't want Ichigo to die. She doesn't want anyone to hurt him. I had to interfere because you were about to do that. There's no way I can let that happen. I'm not going to be the one who allowed tears to form in her pretty little eyes. I couldn't bear it. You understand."
"Ha. So compassionate all of a sudden," Shinji scoffed. "Where was that during out battle for control? You really came at me. You didn't want to listen to me because you didn't want to be tamed. Yet you willingly do it for her?"
"What can I say? She has a certain charm that you lack."
Shinji rolled his eyes.
"She doesn't want Ichigo to get hurt. She doesn't want him to die. You want to talk compassion..." The voice of his Hollow sighed. "It's not just her doing, you know. You don't want to hurt him either. Even you know this is wrong."
Shinji had nothing to say. His Hollow was so insightful. He knew what he was thinking and feeling. He knew that Shinji's heart wasn't in it. He didn't want to hurt Ichigo either. He didn't want to risk killing him.
"That's why it was so easy for me to take over. You're thinking and feeling the same thing. We are both in agreement, Pharaoh. You don't want Ichigo to die. So I can't let you draw your weapon if it's going to be used against him."
That's right. He was conflicted. Shinji truly didn't want to hurt Ichigo. He didn't want to kill him. Sensing this, his Hollow tried to reason with him. He wanted Shinji to fight alongside him so he could carry out Linnette's wish.
Shinji believed in Ichigo. They were friends. He trusted him. Depended on him in times of great need. He couldn't kill him so easily. After seeing Ichigo in a weakened state from the Hollow serum, Shinji knew Ichigo's body couldn't handle much. He pitied Ichigo. He felt sorry for him and didn't want him to suffer. Having a Hollow side himself, Shinji had a connection with Ichigo. They could understand each other. Shinji didn't have Hollow powers by choice, so Ichigo's situation was familiar to him.
How could he possibly kill him knowing all this? Ichigo needed help, not a cage and certainly didn't deserve death.
Shinji knew what that felt like. Something to be killed for possessing a certain power. It was the same. The only true difference was that Ichigo's Hollowfication wasn't normal. Not only was it forced, but it was a poison. Ichigo even mentioned that his Hollow self was suffering. That proved that this wasn't true Hollowfication. His Hollow self wouldn't be in pain if it was normal.
He couldn't kill him. He had to disobey orders. Shinji's Hollow was right. He didn't want to swing his sword. He didn't want to hurt Ichigo. He wanted to save him.
Shinji wanted to do it for a friend and out of a sense of justice. His Hollow wanted to do it for Linnette.
"Captain Hirako!" Soi Fon shouted to him. "Stop standing there and do something!"
Shinji looked up. Ichigo was coming closer, snarling. Shinji jumped back and stood at a distance. He had to think of a way to stop Ichigo without causing him any harm.
"Create an opening for me!" Soi Fon ordered. "I'm going in."
Shinji couldn't follow that order. "I can't! Captain Soi Fon, please listen. If we cause Ichigo any damage, it could be fatal, even if it wasn't meant to be. Even a minor injury could do it."
"Then what do you suggest? Let him keep attacking us like this?"
"I..." Shinji couldn't answer.
Soi Fon had to do this. She couldn't let her men die. The enemy wanted Ichigo dead anyway so it was unlikely for him to survive even if they held back. It was a question of how many Ichigo could take with him. Soi Fon couldn't allow that.
"Captain Soi Fon!" A Soul Reaper came from further away missing a sleeve. "You must come quick!"
"I'm busy right now!"
"This takes priority," he insisted. "There are Hollows near one of the Districts. A town not far. We can't handle them all by ourselves. And there are civilians there as well. They are in danger. We need help evacuating and taking down the Hollows."
Soi Fon looked at Ichigo stumbling around looking for a new target.
"And Captain... These Hollows... They seem to be the same as Kurosaki. We believe they were experimented on as well."
Soi Fon turned around. If that were true, then that meant the enemy wasn't far behind. There were no reports of any Hollow activity on the way to Ichigo's location so this must have been very recent. The Quincy couldn't have been far.
"Right." Soi Fon was heading to that location. "You two keep him busy. I have to take care of this." Soi Fon hurried off with the other Soul Reaper.
Rukia and Shinji looked at each other.
When Ichigo struck, Shinji pulled his sword out to protect himself. He could move freely again. His Hollow must have given him back control over his arm knowing that Shinji would not turn it against Ichigo.
Soi Fon followed the Soul Reaper to the location he spoke of. On her way to Ichigo's location, she had a few of her men take a different route in case there was trouble. She suspected that any number of things could happen. Sending some of the men a different way allowed them to spot anyone who may have been hiding nearby, and they could act as backup should something happen to Soi Fon or her other men that their location. They could even spot other dangers just like now. Soi Fon would have never known there was a town in trouble if her men hadn't been sent out this way.
Soi Fon looked around once they made it into town. It looked like a wave of destruction had hit, blowing holes if roofs and shattering windows. She could hear Hollows growling but couldn't see them. She did, however, see one of her men staggering out of a building, missing his left arm. Another man called to her from a different building.
"Captain... please... help me..."
Soi Fon had to do something. "Look to that man. I'll get this one. Look for more survivers when you can."
"Yes, ma'am."
The two parted and went to the injured men.
Soi Fon went to the man further away and tried to do whatever she could to help him. "Are you alright? Where are you injured?"
The man wasn't speaking. He only stood there.
"Speak. Tell me where you're hurt."
"Ahh!"
Soi Fon turned around and saw the man who had come with her being cut down by the one missing an arm.
"What?!"
The Soul Reaper she was tending to drew his weapon and sliced her arm.
The blood from her wound floated into the air and gathered in a ball over her head.
"Damn..!" Soi Fon had been tricked. He was here.
The Quincy she had fought before came walking out of the building behind the man who had cut her. He chuckled when he saw her.
"Captain, help me, help me," he said in a mocking tone. "Did you like my impression of a fallen comrade? Pretty good, huh? I had to make it convincing. Dead men tell no tales, baby."
Zalya kicked the Soul Reaper standing in front of him to the ground. He was already dead. Soi Fon had been talking to a corpse.
"Gee, baby... Half your men are facing Ichigo and the other are laying here dead. Funny, isn't it? Oh, but don't worry. Your men aren't the only ones I brought to the party, baby."
Innocent people who had been slain in the town came stumbling out of their homes and around buildings like puppets on strings. Two other men from her Squad came with them, dragging their feet, their arms swaying limply as they walked.
"Rising Corpses!" Zalya cheered, playing a solo on his air guitar.
Ichigo opened his eyes and found himself back in his inner world. It was very different from when he had last seen it. The buildings were falling left and right, like melting ice from a roof. They crumbled and fell out of sight. Water was beginning to rise as well. He tried to sit up but he couldn't. His body was too heavy to move.
"King..."
Ichigo turned his head to the left. His Hollow self was collapsed on a shattered piece of building. He looked sick. Even worse than the last time he saw him.
"King... Your fault..."
Ichigo frowned. "Yeah, yeah. I know. I messed up. Just shut up about it already."
"... I can't move... Everything hurts..."
"I know. Me, too."
His Hollow struggled to lift his head. "Are you going to do something or not?"
"What the hell do you want me to do?"
"Ooh, suddenly His Majesty doesn't have all the answers. You usually know exactly what you're doing. Or at least you think you do. Certainly act like it."
Ichigo clenched his fists. "What do you want me to say? I got nothing!"
"Tch. Weak as ever..."
"Then you take over and do something about this."
His Hollow started laughing. "You finally give me permission to take over and I'm too weak to do it. How ironic. How cruel." He hung his head laughter spilling from his lips. "How do you like that? I can't take over like I've always wanted. You tell me I can and I can't... Do you have any idea how that feels?"
Ichigo turned back to the skyscraper overhead. "I'm sorry."
His Hollow looked up again, staring at him in surprise. "What did you say?"
"I'm sorry."
He was stunned. He didn't know what to say.
"I'm sorry I got us into this. I'm sorry I told you to do something you can't and made you feel that way. I'm sorry for what you're going through. I'm sorry for... For what's happening."
His Hollow just stared at him. Then he frowned and turned away. "Tch. Pity. Self-hate. Your sorrow will only drown us anyway. I don't want to hear it. Those are the words of the weak. How am I supposed to respect you if you say things like that?"
"But I am."
He truly was sorry. He knew it was a trap. He should have listened to Shinji. He knew he was right but ignored it anyway.
Because of his stubbornness and impulsive actions, his Hollow was suffering. He was suffering. He didn't stop to think how many people would be effected if something should happen to him. He shared this body with another. If he died, so would his Hollow. His suffering was being passed into his other self as well. He didn't stop to consider him or what could possibly happen.
He should have foreseen this. Those experimental Hollows should have been a clue. He should have thought. He knew it was a trap. Why didn't he listen?
He knew why. He was doing this to save the life of a friend. Three friends. It was in him to protect. He couldn't just sit and wait for something to happen. He had to take action. It was in his nature. Even to not always think ahead and see what could happen if he took a certain action.
No, that wasn't it. He knew it was a trap and prepared for it. He had a plan. His enemy was just smarter.
Maybe that was why he felt the need to apologize. Not just because he felt responsible for his Hollow's suffering, but because he was angry at himself. He felt sorry for himself. That he wasn't strong enough. That's what it was. He had a plan. He did think. He was trying to be smart about this. His enemy was just better.
He wasn't as strong as he thought and that was why he had to say those words aloud.
"I just didn't want any of my friends to get hurt. I don't want them to die."
His Hollow didn't lift his head this time. "Maybe you can be selfish once in a while and think of yourself first. Ever consider that, King?"
Ichigo turned his head from side to side. "Maybe I am being selfish without thinking about it. I don't want to lose my friends. So I have to protect them. Maybe that's me being selfish. I want to keep them in my life."
He sighed. "King... Sometimes I wonder just how much you really understand."
Ichigo's eyes began to close. "Maybe I don't understand anything."
He couldn't think. He couldn't move. He couldn't do anything.
All he wanted to do was rest.
The stairs were a challenge. Ichigo always had trouble going down them standing up. It was easier going up because then he could crawl on his hands and knees like a dog. He could scoot down on his backside but he was a big boy now and had to go down the stairs like his parents. Ichigo gripped the handrail tightly with both hands as he stepped down on the first step. The handrail was right at eye level. Holding on tightly, he took big steps down the stairs. One step down with one foot, then the other foot would step beside the first so he could step again. He always had both feet on the step before he went to the next one. He wasn't confident enough to go one step at a time with one foot each. His legs weren't long enough.
Finally he made it to the floor and took a giant step off the last step. He looked around the kitchen. He was hungry. He couldn't see over the table so he had no idea if there was food waiting for him or not.
He saw a pair of legs sitting at the table and hurried over with a smile. He climbed into the adjacent seat and sat down. He could barely see over the table. Normally he had to sit on a stack of books in order to sit without his chin being directly on the table.
"There you are, baby."
Ichigo smiled at his mother.
"Are you hungry?" His mother pushed a bowl towards him along with a plastic spoon. "Here, have some."
"Can I have chocolate?" he asked in a squeaky voice.
"It's not dinnertime yet. You can have it after you eat dinner."
Ichigo was a little disappointed but all he had to do was make it through dinner and he would get some chocolate.
Ichigo took the spoon in his fist and pushed himself up in the chair. On his knees, he could reach the bowl better. He didn't know what it was but it was a fun color. He was able to eat solid foods but most of his meals were soft and easy to chew. He dipped his spoon into the bowl and lifted it up to his mouth. It was oatmeal. The color was different from the kind his parents ate but he liked it that way. It made it more fun. He didn't know what made his oatmeal a different color but he never questioned it. He just thought it made him special.
Ichigo looked at his mother who was reading in the seat beside him. "Mama."
She looked at him with a smile. "Yes, baby?"
"When they coming?"
His mother giggled and put a hand on her stomach. "We have a few months to go still."
Ichigo put more oatmeal into his mouth.
"Are you excited about having two sisters?"
"Uh-huh." He fed himself more oatmeal. He spoon brushed against his nose, smearing food onto his face.
"You get to be a big brother. How special."
"Yeah!" Ichigo flung the spoon into the air. Oatmeal splattered on the table and floor.
"Oh, you're so excited." His mother started to clean his mess without making a fuss. "But it's a very important job, Ichigo."
"I know. I can do it." Ichigo tried to scoop some oatmeal off the table with his spoon but it only smeared. So he picked it up with his hand instead and sucked on his fingers.
"Baby..." His mother cleaned his face off with a wet cloth. "I know you can do it. I believe in you, sweetie. But there's something else important that you have to understand. When your sisters come, they're going to be tiny little babies."
"I know. Like me from way, way, way not too long ago but a while."
His mother laughed at his words. "That's right. And you know how mommy and daddy had to take care of you and everything? How you couldn't feed yourself because you were so tiny and how you couldn't walk on your own?"
"Yeah, but not anymore." Ichigo held up the spoon with pride. "Now I'm grown up into a big boy! Just like mommy said I was. Now I can do stuff like you and daddy."
"That's right, Ichigo. That's very good and I'm so proud of you."
Ichigo giggled and put more oatmeal into his mouth.
"But your sisters aren't going to be able to do those things when they're born. They'll be tiny and only able to drink milk. Not big kid food like we give you. They're going to be helpless so mommy and daddy are going to have to give them lots of attention. They can't do anything on their own. They won't even be able to talk. All they can do is cry."
"Then how will you know what they need, mama?"
"That's the tough part. Daddy and I are going to have to guess and hope we get it right. If they cry, it could mean anything. It could mean that they're hungry, or need to be changed, or they're too cold or too hot, they could be cranky or hurt or even scared. And that's going to be tough to figure out so mommy and daddy need to pay extra close attention to them. And because there is going to be two of them, it will be even tougher."
His mother gave Ichigo a sympathetic smile, leaning in closer.
"That means that mommy and daddy might not be able to give you all our attention like we used to. You're growing up and can do things on your own. But your sisters won't be able to do that. So I want you to understand that we still love you and if we're not giving you as much attention as we used to, it's not because we don't care about you anymore. It's because we can't ignore your sisters. They're going to need a lot of help."
Ichigo nodded. "I get it. I know, mama."
"I promise we'll still be able to give you lots of love and attention, but you're going to have to share with your sisters. Can you do that, Ichigo? Can you show me how much of a big boy you are? And can you help make your sisters feel welcome?"
"Uh-huh. I can."
"That's my boy. Very good."
"I'll even help you. Like a grown-up, I can help take care of them, too. That way I'm still doing stuff with mommy."
"Oh, how wonderful, Ichigo. You really think you can do that?"
"Course I can! I'm a big boy!" Ichigo stood on his chair, knocking over his bowl. "Oops."
"That's ok, Ichigo. Mommy will get that."
"No, I'm a big boy. I'll clean it and show mommy how good I can help." Ichigo bent down and pressed his cheek against the smooth table top. Using his hand, he pushed the spilled oatmeal across the table and into his open mouth.
His mother started laughing.
Ichigo licked the table clean. "See? All clean!"
She was still laughing. Then she scooped him out of his chair and spun him around. Ichigo squealed with delight and laughed along with his mother. Then she pulled him in for a hug.
"Oh, Ichigo... I think I'll give the table a wash anyway. That's what mommies do. We clean up after our babies."
"But I'm not a baby anymore. I'm a big boy!"
"Yes, you are, sweetie." She kissed his forehead. "But no matter how old you get, you will always be my baby." She kissed him again and wiped the oatmeal from around his mouth with her thumb. "Mommy loves you."
Ichigo turned his head to the side. "Mommy... Mom..."
He opened his eyes.
He was back in his inner world. It was just as he left it. A crumbling mess with rising water.
Getting some strength back in his limbs, Ichigo pushed himself into a sitting position.
"What just...? What was that?"
He remembered. He was having a dream. A dream about his mother.
No, this felt different. He felt like he had lived it. It seemed so familiar.
"Did I just hear you mutter 'mommy', Your Majesty?"
Ichigo's cheeks turned pink. He couldn't help it if he muttered in his sleep, but of all things to say that was pretty embarrassing. "I, uh... was having a dream. But it was strange."
"What dream isn't?"
"No. This was different. It seemed so familiar to me. Like it really happened. I was little and my mom was still pregnant with my sisters."
His Hollow had a simple answer. "That wasn't a dream. It must have been a memory."
"A memory?"
"Why not?" His Hollow looked at the sky around them. "You're kinda inside yourself. Why wouldn't you find memories in here? Makes sense. Then again, what do I know? My body's shot, so for all I know my mind is the next thing to go. I mean, you were talking nonsense before, right? All that sorry stuff."
Ichigo wasn't paying attention. He was dwelling on the memory he just had. It was like he was living it again. He wasn't inside the memory watching it happen. It was from his perspective. He felt everything he experienced in the memory. He could even taste the oatmeal and feel his mother's kisses.
"It was strange. I don't get why that happened."
As strange as it was, it was something he enjoyed. It was the only thing pleasant to come out of this mess. Everything else he was experiencing was painful. It was nice to revisit a fond memory. Even a memory he had long forgotten he had.
Who else likes Shinji's Hollow? I love him! Both of them.
Please review! ^-^