Summary: Patsy and Delia's relationship is tested.
Disclaimer: Call The Midwife belongs to the BBC and others - I am simply borrowing their beautiful characters.
Author's note: Thank you all for your ongoing support in this. Every time I start to think I'm beginning to get towards the climax I get another idea, so it will be going on for a bit longer yet. Hope it isn't getting tedious for you.
Patsy sighed with relief as she reached Nonnatus House at the end of her rounds. Although her headache had dissipated, she still felt delicate and tired. All she really wanted to do was lie down and sleep but there were other things she simply had to do first.
The tall midwife successfully managed to stow her bike and retrieve her medical bag while juggling a bunch of flowers she had purchased from the local florists. On this occasion she made no attempt to be discreet with her gift, as there was no lie involved in explaining them away; she had bought them to thank Delia for looking after her last night, and to say sorry for disturbing her much needed sleep.
She told sister Mary Cynthia this as she went through her kit bag in the prep room, replacing used items and ensuring it was ready for the next shift. The small nun smiled. "That's a lovely gesture, Patsy."
"It doesn't really feel like it's enough, but I wanted to do something," the red-haired nurse admitted.
"Has Delia not accepted your apologies in the past?" Sister Mary Cynthia was surprised; the Welsh nurse always gave the impression that she was quick to forgive.
The question brought Patsy up short and she thought for a moment. She smiled fondly as she replied. "Always. But that doesn't mean I should take her for granted."
The nun smiled back. "Quite right too. Go on, I'll finish up here. I think she's up in her room."
"Are you sure?" Patsy checked, not wanting to take advantage.
At sister Mary Cynthia's nod and smile, Patsy grabbed the flowers and headed upstairs. She knocked on the door softly but entered anyway, despite not getting an answer.
Delia was sprawled on top of her bed, still in her uniform, fast asleep. A book lay on the floor and her arm overhung the bed so Patsy could only assume she had succumbed while reading. She smiled adoringly before making her way over to the bed and kneeling down.
Patsy hesitated. She was torn between waking Delia up, knowing that they needed to talk, and letting the poor woman sleep. The decision was made for her when Delia's eyes snapped open, making her jump slightly.
"Have you been watching me?" Delia mumbled, her voice heavy with sleep.
Patsy cocked her head slightly. "I was trying to decide whether to wake you or not. I owe you an apology."
Delia rolled onto her back and rubbed her eyes roughly. She sat up and shifted over, patting the space on the bed next to her in a gesture for Patsy to join her. Patsy laid the flowers on the nightstand before positioning herself next to Delia, leaning against the headboard and relishing the warmth from Delia's body pressing against her side.
"I'm supposed to be furious with you," the brunette grumbled as Patsy settled.
"You have every right to be," Patsy responded contritely, offering a small half smile.
Delia took note of Patsy's pale complexion and her thoughts were immediately diverted. "How are you feeling?" She asked, her voice suddenly full of compassion.
Patsy shrugged ruefully. "As expected I'm afraid." She looked at Delia. "Sorry," she said sincerely.
The Welsh nurse raised her eyebrows. "Sorry about going out? Sorry about getting drunk, or sorry about waking me up somewhat rudely?" There was a twinkle of mischief in her eyes as she said the last part but the first part of the question had been said in absolute seriousness.
Patsy winced. "Sorry about all of it really." She looked at Delia steadily. "I'd like to try and explain, but I don't want you to think I'm simply making excuses." Patsy had heard enough apologies with a 'but' at the end to know how hollow they sounded. She didn't want Delia to think that at all.
Delia nodded. "Go on."
Patsy took one of Delia's hands in her own and grasped it tightly. "While I was at the clinic yesterday, I recalled a conversation I'd had with Dr Parker. She said that she often scared people off with her forthrightness. I had been a bit remote after seeing you so upset, so I thought that the right thing to do would be to apologise and then maintain our professional relationship."
Delia stiffened. "Not sure this is helping," she admitted.
Patsy looked at the brunette in confusion before realising what she getting at. "Surely you still don't think I see Dr Parker as anything other than a co-worker. I thought we'd sorted that out?"
Delia sighed. "It's not you I'm worried about, but go on," she prompted, not wanting to rehash that particularly prickly point when she had only just woken up.
Patsy paused for a moment and then took a breath to continue. "I spoke to her, apologised for not speaking to her much and she invited me out for a drink. I didn't want to turn her down after bridging the gap so I said yes, fully expecting to go for one drink at the local."
"Dr Parker said she'd rather not drink locally, given that we could bump into patients, and as we've experienced that in the past, I couldn't really blame her, so I agreed and we went into town. One drink led to another, and before I knew it, it was closing time."
"Do you remember how much you had to drink?" Delia asked softly.
Patsy shook her head, a look of chagrin on her face. "Not really. Given the hangover I've had today, I would say far more than I should have though."
"Did she drink the same amount as you?" Delia tried to keep her voice neutral.
Patsy frowned for a moment as she tried to recall. "I think so. Why?"
Delia drew her lips into a tight-lipped smile. "I'm just wondering how both she and you thought it would be a good idea to drive back in that condition."
Patsy's eyes widened for a second before she winced. "It didn't even occur to me," she admitted.
"You could have been killed," Delia retorted. She bit down on the anger that was rising; she needed to direct that toward someone else. She nodded for Patsy to continue again.
"Sorry. I suppose at that point, all I wanted to do was get home and see you. That's another apology I owe you." The red-haired nurse looked at their clasped hands for a second before looking back up at Delia. "I don't really remember much about what happened when I got home. I wasn't too ghastly, was I?"
Delia shook her head. "You were certainly a lot less guarded than you usually are," she commented drily.
Patsy groaned and leaned her head back against the headboard. "Sorry. You must be exhausted."
"I didn't let you go that far," Delia riposted, unable to resist jumping on a potential double entendre.
Patsy blushed to the roots of her hair. "Oh my god, did I...?"
Delia grinned impishly. "Oh, you wanted to. I won't describe how you woke me up."
Even as she said the words, Patsy had flashes of recall and her blush grew deeper. "I am so sorry."
"I told you last night I was going to read you the riot act when you were sober. All during my shift I was rehearsing what I was going to say, and how I was going to say it. It got impressively long at one point. I'm sure Mr Matthews in bed 5 thought I was going barmy." She fixed Patsy with a stare. "I don't really need to shout at you, do I?" Her voice was barely a whisper yet Patsy had no doubt of the steel within her words.
The midwife shook her head. "I'm not sure anything you say will make me feel any more miserable than I do already," she replied candidly. "But you have every right to yell, Deels. I was terribly reckless last night."
It was Delia's turn to look at their clasped hands. "Pats, it's not just about the fact that you were overly amorous, or a bit too loud, or that you got in a car and trusted her to drive you home when you were both three sheets to the wind." She paused for a moment. "I just don't think you gave much thought to my feelings in all of this."
Patsy sighed. "Delia, I don't know what else I can say to reassure you that I only see her as a colleague."
Delia leaned back and looked away. "I don't know what you can say either. I know I'm being unfair Pats. I know I shouldn't expect any right to say who you can spend time with. But there is something about her that I don't trust and because of that, it's tainted everything." She sighed. "It hurt that you decided to go out with her just after we'd been sorting through what had happened."
The Welsh woman paused, thinking for a few minutes before nodding to herself. "I know you only see her as a colleague. I think I'm feeling this way because I got a bad read from her. There was a definite undercurrent of snobbery when she spoke with me." She shrugged. "But, like you said, she's never hinted that she sees women that way."
Patsy winced. "Ahh," she hedged, recalling the conversation from the first part of the evening.
Delia's head snapped round to look at Patsy. "What?"
"She gave a definite hint that she was not interested in men," Patsy told her honestly.
Delia shot off the bed in alarm. "What do you mean?" She demanded.
Patsy sat up but remained on the bed, determined for their conversation not to escalate. "She told me that most of her professors and consultants tried to make a pass at her during training. And then she said she wasn't interested." Patsy shrugged slightly. "I connected the dots."
"Patsy, did she make a pass at you?" Delia was bubbling with energy now, all her hidden fears rising rapidly to the surface.
"Absolutely not," the midwife retorted instantly. "And even if she did, I would have turned her down."
Delia's mind flashed back to the night before when Patsy's restraint had all but disappeared. She groaned in frustration. It would be so easy to assume that Patsy was equally unrestrained with the doctor, but Delia was determined not to do that. She knew Patsy loved her, and the diminutive nurse had to have faith that she would not behave in that way with anyone else. "Will you at least admit now that she might just be interested in you?"
Patsy's eyes opened in surprise as suddenly the penny dropped. "Well, haven't I been frightfully naive?" She asked rhetorically. She glanced down, as she tried to recall her interactions with the doctor, to see if there were any other clues she had failed to pick up on. She felt the bed give slightly as Delia sat back down. "Are you going to say 'I told you so?'" She asked softly.
"No, but I am going to remind you that I got to you first," the Welsh woman replied, before lifting Patsy's chin up and placing a firm kiss on her lips. Patsy took the opportunity to deepen the kiss and they spent long moments revelling in the sensation of each other.
Eventually, they broke apart and Delia rested her head on Patsy's shoulder. The two women sat in silence for several moments, tired by the conversation, in addition to their lack of sleep. The mood was now less tense, though they both knew they were in a fragile state. There was definitely a lot more talking to be done.
Eventually Delia felt compelled to speak again. "Does this hangover mean you're off whiskey for good?"
Patsy tried to suppress a shudder. "Probably not for good, but I'm not going to be able to face it for a while," she admitted.
"Oh." Delia sounded distinctly disappointed.
Patsy nudged Delia's head off her shoulder so that she could look at the brunette again. "Why?"
Delia couldn't help the devilish grin that lit up her face. "I quite liked you being all forward like that," she teased.
Patsy rolled her eyes. "Deels!"
The Welsh woman giggled. "If it haven't been for the petrifying thought that we could get caught at any moment, I would have been totally yours for the taking."
"Now you know what my mind does every time you decide to push the boundaries," Patsy mock-scolded, grinning.
"Yes, I do. But it won't stop me from teasing you every now and again."
"I wouldn't expect anything less from you." She leaned in and gently kissed the younger woman. "I love you, Delia Busby."
"I love you too," Delia sighed into Patsy's lips.
As they pulled apart again, Patsy caught sight of the clock on the nightstand. "They'll be expecting us for dinner. I really ought to get changed."
"Me too," Delia agreed.
"I'll knock for you in ten minutes."
Delia smiled. "That reminds me of when we were at the Nurses Home."
"Yes," agreed Patsy. "But at least here the food will be infinitely better." With a final peck on the lips, Patsy left Delia for her own room and returned promptly, 10 minutes later.
"Promise me something, Pats," Delia requested as they descended the stairs.
"What's that?"
"Promise me you'll never get in a car that's going to be driven by someone who is drunk, again." Delia was deadly serious.
"I promise," Patsy responded, equally seriously. Delia nodded, seeing that Patsy meant it.
Voices bubbled up as they approached the dining area and Patsy stiffened as she heard the tones of Dr Parker. She glanced quickly at Delia, who simply raised her eyebrows. "Ready?" The brunette asked daringly.
Patsy wasn't sure she had an answer.
To be continued...