When Alex walked out the rundown building, the whole street seemed to light up and for the first time in days Piper remembered why she had fallen for this girl in the first place.
Her green eyes were darker than Rory's but in the light of the streetlamps they were glowing like fire and the way she looked at Piper, who was leaning against her car, was full of life and sass.
Closing the gap between them with a last few steps, Alex slung her arms around Piper, pulling her in for a kiss.
Piper breathed in her familiar scent and she felt like she hadn't had this scent around her for ever, right now Alex finally felt close to her again and all just because she was finally free from all the doubts and pain of her past.
Pulling back to get some air, Alex leaned her forhead against Piper's and the green in her eyes filled Piper's heart like warm milk.
„I missed you." Alex whispered, almost inaudible, but Piper could hear it as loud as if Alex was sitting in her ear. Everything else was just background.
Then Alex rised her eyebrows like she always did, pushing her glasses to the top of her head, while she leant her whole body against Piper's, pressing her aganist the car where her hands were now laying on top of.
„Sooooo, what brings you to my part of the town in the middle of the night young lady." she grinned suggestively.
Piper had to laugh, she felt so light that she was sure she would start flying away like a balloon any second. She shook her head, playfully shocked.
„Can you ever think of anything else than sex?"
„Can you blame me?" Alex eyed Piper's body from head to toe and again Piper just shook her head.
„Come, get in the car." Piper smiled before pecking a kiss on her girl's lips and walked around her car to sit down onto the driver's seat.
She didn't wait a second longer as needed, the second Alex closed the door behind her, Piper stepped on the gas and drove off down the street.
„Where are you taking me?" Alex asked, lying her hand on top of Piper's on the gear stick.
Piper didn't answer until she was on the highway and she didn't look at her, keeping her eyes pinned on the street.
She took a deep breath. „Well, I just wanna talk to you and since you always run away eventually, I wanted to make sure you can't"
„I don't run away." Alex said, getting offensive of herself.
Piper sighed, she had had this realization only today and she could not expect Alex to be aware of it when she hadn't been all this time.
„Al, do you realize that since I know you, whenever we saw each other YOU were the one leaving ME in the end. And yeah I know you have a job and stuff, but I feel like we're never get to finish our conversations. There is so much left unsaid." Piper still didn't take her eyes off the street.
„Where is this suddenly coming from?" Alex sounded surprised, her hand had left Piper's and Piper could feel her eyes burning holes into her face.
„I met Rory today." Piper stated, trying to keep emotions out of her voice and facial expression.
The holes Alex burned into Piper's face started getting deeper and it became harder to not look at her as she kind of wanted to see the reaction, but her voice was enough to feel the shock that Alex was feeling.
„Your ex?"
„She is not really my ex!"
„Then why are you bringing this up now?"
Piper had driven off the highway and was now pulling up to the side of the nearly abandoned road.
Unbuckling herself she turned around to her girlfriend.
„I met her at a support group today." Saying this she stroked her thumb over the gear stick, trying to keep her hands busy as Rory had done earlier, and she stopped as soon as she realized this. „And well, we talked, like talked for hours until we both felt like there was nothing left unsaid."
„Great" Alex snorted, shaking her head. „So now you can come to me and blame me for all our problems huh? Now that you have her back?"
„Al." Piper took Alex's hand in her's and used her free hand to make Alex look at her. „I love you. And I really wanna make this work, but that for we need to talk about stuff. Talk about our problems no matter how uncomfortable that is."
Alex looked at Piper and shrugged her shoulders.
„Then say what you wanna say."
„I don't wanna say anything, I wanna talk with my girlfriend."
„Talking is kind of hard without saying anything, kid." Alex grinned, lifting a weight off Piper's shoulders, who had been afraid that they might actually start fighting again.
„Come." Piper exited her car, walking around it to open Alex's door before she could do it on her own. She grabbed her hand and started running into the field next to the street and then she just let herself fall onto the ground, pulling the raven haired girl down with her.
She rolled over until she was lying on top of Alex, giving her a kiss on her lips.
Alex wrapped her arms around her body, looking at her.
„Tell me about Rory." She said and Piper started talking and talking and talking.
They were lying in the grass building a square angle, Piper's head on top of Alex's belly, Alex's arm on Piper's waist and they were staring in the cloudy dark sky. Now and then a single star was to be seen when the clouds moved apart a bit.
„You know, I get why you're afraid of telling your sister the truth. I get it now more than ever and believe me there was a second when I thought I should just take back that ultimatum. But..."
Piper kept staring in the sky, stroking her index finger over the back of Alex's hand on her waist.
„... I also realized that I must look out for myself. Because I am the only variable I can control and if I don't take care of myself who else is gonna do it? Rory never took care of herself, she never stood up for herself and now she is even skinnier than I am and she still hasn't been able to even start to beat her illness in over three years."
Alex didn't answer, Piper could feel her stomach move up and down as she was breathing in and out. She sighed deeply and Piper could feel her desperation leaking through when Alex started talking.
„For a second I wanted to say that I'm taking care of you but …. that would be a lie. I'm not a good person. I never had a reason to be aside from my family and they never needed me to be good, they just needed me to be strong... Then there's you. And I really hope you are reason enough for me to change but truth is, I can't promise. Nicky and my mum, they are everything to me."
Piper turned around, leaning onto her elbows, giving a kiss on Alex's stomach that only touched her jacket.
„Just tell her. I'm sure she loves you as much as you love her." Piper didn't really believe what she was saying, she could hardly believe someone like Nichols was able to love. „And if she does, she'll want you to be happy. She won't turn her back on you and all the other numbnuts at school, they do what she says anyway, that's not gonna change because of her sister dating a loser."
Alex took a strand of hair between her fingertips and let them run through her fingers. Closing her eyes, Piper enjoyed the light touch. It was cold outside, only the moon that shined through the cloud cover lit the two of them and now and then the light of a passing car shed light over them.
And for the first time Piper really had the feeling that she had said everything that was on her mind.
A shiver ran down her spine as Alex ran her fingertips over the smooth skin of Pipers lips. She moved towards Alex, cupping her cheek with her hand while she was keeping herself up with her other arm.
She trailed her finger along Alex's features, drawing her lips and eyes with her touch.
„I love you." she whispered and she wished that Alex would say it back, just once, but the raven haired girl just smiled and her green intense eyes were so full of emotions that she didn't need to say anything for Piper to know. She would give her the time she needed to finally say it.
When their lips met in a light, almost innocent touch, the first raindrops started falling on top of their heads, but Piper couldn't pull herself away from Alex's lips and they melted into each other while the water was threatening to soak them. The smell of wet grass and earth migled with the scent of Alex's shampoo and the damp textile was sticking to her skin, making her shiver.
„Come babe, let's go home." Alex whispered, stroking the wet hair out of Piper's face.
„Home?"
„You could sleep at my house. We could take a shower together." Alex stared on the wet hairstrand she had just taken between her fingertips, while Piper was rising her eyebrows, not quite understanding.
„What about Nicky. Isn't she at home?"
Alex shrugged her shoulders. „I don't know. Doesn't matter."
Piper didn't believe what she was hearing and at the same time she didn't know what she should think about it, how she should feel.
„I mean, she can't freak out when my mum is around right?"
Standing up, Alex pulled Piper up on her legs, they both were soaked from the rain and Piper was shivering from the cold of her wet clothes even though the air was still warm in the middle of this night.
Before she started the gear, she sent a text to her mum and also one to her dad, because she had no idea if the two of them were talking and who was with Cal right now.
The drive to Alex's neighborhood was a silent one and Piper was mortified. She had wanted Alex to not care about what her sister was thinking for ever, but now she was dreading this encounter. And she also was scared to meet Alex's mother, this woman had brought Alex up, had given her everything she ever had and Piper was terrified that she might consider her to be not good enough for her daughter.
She couldn't bear another one of Alex's family hating her.
She parked the car a few blocks from Alex's house. She didn't want to give Nichols the possibility of destroying it when she found out what was really going on between her and Alex, especially after she had threatened her only today.
„Shhh. They are probably asleep already." Alex whispered as she was pulling Piper after her through the short dark hall behind that dark red scuffed door of the appartment.
Alex groped her way through the hall and then pulled Piper into a room, shutting the door close silently behind them. She pressed Piper against the door, not bothering to turn on the light.
Piper's heart started racing as she felt Alex's hands opening the zipper of her wet jacket, while she pressed her body close to her's.
Piper couldn't see anything, she could just feel Alex's touch and presence, could smell her wet hair and hear her heavy breath. It was making her heart race, and it felt almost toxic in the best way possible.
Alex kept undressing her and when she felt their naked skins against each other the goosebumps in her neck were running down her spine.
The light flickered when Alex finally turned it on, blinding Piper for a second. They were in a tiny bathroom. Next to the sink with a crack in it was a toilet bowl and an old shower with a white shower curtain. There was no room for much more in there.
Alex pulled Piper under the shower and when the hot water hit Piper's ice-cold skin she felt like she couldn't breathe for a second until Alex wrapped her arms around her pulling her as close as possible.
There she was, in Alex's bathroom, with Alex. Only the two of them, skin on skin, making all clocks stand still.
Here it is, an all Vauseman chapter for all of you my lovelies :)
I really hope you enjoyed it.
I also know some of you had asked me to write more about Alex's POV and I guess I have to disappoint you here. It is part of the concept of this story that we only ever know Piper's side, know what Piper knows, feel what she feels, that we're as confused as she is (Well at leat you, I know exactly what's going on in Alex's mind;)). I really wanna keep it that way, because it does feel more real and it helps me creating a real and genuine inside in Piper as a character. As readers we often know much more about what is going on than we do in real life, we watch everything from above but I want you to watch it through Piper's eyes and be still able to see Piper from the out- and inside (I hope that makes sense).
!BUT! I've been thinking of writing a small collection of one shots after completing this story that revolve around Alex's side of the story, Alex's view on some of the important scenes and chapters and also Alex's relationship with Nicky. Please tell me if you were interested in reading this kind of stuff
XXX