Summary: Patsy and Delia's relationship is tested.
Disclaimer: Call The Midwife belongs to the BBC and others - I am simply borrowing their beautiful characters.
Author's note: Thank you once again to jlynsca for taking the trouble to proof-read this for me. Future updates won't be quite so swift I'm afraid as I've now pretty much caught up on what I'd completed before I went away on hols. Enjoy...
Delia was grateful for the relatively silent company of sister Monica Joan as she sat in the kitchen with a cup of tea. She had dutifully assisted the elderly nun in searching for hidden treats and had discovered a batch of bread pudding that was deemed passable fare for the discerning cake-lover, and she watched in awe as the nun demolished a huge slice. Despite that apparent focus on her own needs, Delia knew that sister Monica Joan was providing support in her own, unique way. To be honest, she didn't think she was up to talking much anyway. Every time she thought about what had happened, she could feel a familiar raw burn in the back of her throat and she had to concentrate to force her emotions down.
It was the main reason she was still seated at the table rather than looking for sister Julienne. Delia knew she had to inform the senior nun; indeed she felt duty-bound to, but she wanted to see the woman once she had a grip on her feelings. Delia had to be on guard with anything she said. She would be extremely surprised if Patsy had been mentioned in the accusation, but she didn't know for sure. Even if Dr. Parker had simply made the complaint against her, it was obvious to everyone at the convent that Patsy and Delia were close. If word got out, it would not be a big leap to assume that the accusation applied to Patsy as well. Whatever happened, Delia was determined that Patsy would not be dragged into this too.
It didn't even occur to the Welsh nurse that it could have been anyone else other than Dr. Parker that made the complaint. She had done nothing in the last few weeks that would merit any sort of complaint. It could only be her.
Delia was interrupted from her brooding by a soft voice behind her. "Nurse Busby?"
The brunette looked round and saw sister Julienne standing in the hallway. She sighed and smiled grimly at the senior nun, deciding to be as honest as she could in the circumstances. "Sister Julienne. I was just trying to muster up the courage to see you."
Sister Julienne nodded. "Perhaps we can talk in my office," she suggested mildly, not waiting for an answer as she turned away. "You may bring your tea with you," she called over her shoulder.
Delia closed her eyes for a long moment, trying to centre herself now that the time had arrived. She looked up as she felt a warm hand grip her shoulder and saw the compassionate eyes of sister Monica Joan looking at her. "Love is not love that cannot be shown," she quoted, patting her shoulder before reaching to the table and taking the plate that held Delia's slice of bread pudding and wandering off toward the garden.
Delia took a steadying breath, taking strength from the woman's actions. If an elderly nun could see the value of love and not be judgemental, perhaps there was a way out of this that wasn't a total catastrophe.
Grabbing the still unopened letter from her bag, Delia made her way quickly to sister Julienne's office and tapped on the door politely. She entered when told to do so and sat down at the vacant chair in front of the sister's desk.
"Nurse Busby, I've had a rather lengthy telephone conversation with Matron Lightly," she began, forgoing any other preamble.
"I'm sorry sister. I meant to report straight to you but I needed a few moments first," Delia hurriedly explained, handing over the letter as she did.
Sister Julienne took the letter but placed it on the desk, uninterested in its contents. "I make no criticism of any perceived tardiness, nurse Busby. Matron Lightly rang as she was concerned about you. She wanted to make sure that you had returned here safely after leaving the hospital in what she described as a rather perturbed state."
Delia felt profoundly confused. This was not the way she expected this conversation to start at all. Matron Lightly had never shown anything other than an iron discipline on the ward and had a reputation for being a bit of a Tartar. "It's been a difficult day," she admitted softly, not trusting herself to say anything more.
"Yes. Matron Lightly has outlined the nature of the complaint for me, but given me no specific details." Sister Julienne could see Delia stiffen defensively, but she needed to continue. "I can assure you that she took great pains to only divulge what was absolutely necessary. She also asked me to inform you that she would be taking on the investigation personally, so as to minimise the possibility of rumours spreading."
Delia raised an eyebrow at this. Most complaints were investigated by the senior sister on the ward. Was it really that Matron didn't want rumours to spread, or was she treating it so seriously that it was certain to lead to her dismissal?
Sister Julienne watched the young nurse carefully, and realised that she was spiralling into thinking the worst. "Nurse Busby, I have known Matron Lightly for more years than I care to remember. I delivered three of her sister's children, and she assisted me in the birth of her sister's fourth. I know her to be a dedicated nurse, disciplined and thorough." She paused and smiled slightly. "I spent many hours trying to convince her to become a midwife, but Matron Lightly thrives on the structure and routine of the Ward. She has a reputation for being strict but if you look more deeply, you will find that her reputation is all about the highest possible standards. Her investigation will be objective, fair and complete."
Delia nodded mechanically. While it was reassuring to know that Matron Lightly wouldn't just make assumptions and hold a witch-hunt, if she was as thorough as sister Julienne intimated, then she was bound to uncover the truth. She was brought from her reverie by sister Julienne talking again.
"I don't mean to pry, and feel free to remain quiet, but can I ask if anything has happened that might cause an accusation like this?"
Delia was impressed by the sister's ability to make such a loaded question sound so innocuous. She would not lie to sister Julienne; she could not. But she chose to interpret the question in her own way, and felt sure it had been exactly what sister Julienne expected. "Sister, I haven't had a proper night out in weeks. Most of my shifts have either been nights, lates or those horrendous mid-shifts that ruin the whole day. I went out for a cup of tea at The Silver Buckle after my nights ended the other week, and spent most of the evening trying to keep my eyes open." She paused for a few seconds and blushed slightly. "I've been so tired, I even fell asleep on the bus on my way home, but Cyril woke me up when we got to my stop."
"That is not the sort of behaviour that is expected from a registered nurse in uniform," sister Julienne admonished gently and Delia nodded, accepting the rebuke.
"I'm sorry sister. It's never happened before." She sighed deeply. "I can't think of anything else I've done or said that would provoke a complaint of this nature. I just haven't had the time or opportunity."
"Opportunity?" Sister Julienne queried.
Delia shook her head. "I can't imagine anyone finding me working, coming home, eating and sleeping and then doing it all again anything other than mundane. I've spent more time here at Nonnatus than at the hospital to be honest." She paused suddenly, her eyes widening in fear. "The complaint didn't come from here, did it, Sister?"
Sister Julienne shook her head. "No, it didn't. And no-one here has made any negative comment regarding your behaviour or temperament, Nurse Busby. Indeed, we have found you to be a most welcome addition to our family here."
Delia managed a weak smile and took a deep breath, trying to find her equilibrium again. "Thank you, Sister," she replied quietly.
Sister Julienne nodded thoughtfully, before continuing. "Matron Lightly was of the impression that you thought you might no longer be welcome here?" She probed gently, but sounded almost offended by the insinuation.
Delia shifted uncomfortably. "Sister, the accusation is all about reputation. I didn't want the convent to be placed under any shadow of suspicion or damaged by association."
Sister Julienne looked steadily at the Welsh woman, feeling a huge surge of pride and admiration for the woman's bravery and honour. "Nurse Busby, your conscience does you credit, but we are a family at Nonnatus and we stick together through our trials as well as our triumphs."
Delia bit back a sob as she heard the words, and determinedly looked towards the ceiling, desperately trying to stop tears from falling. She was starting to feel overwhelmed by the senior nun's enduring understanding and care.
"There is no question of you leaving here. And if you need any support when Matron Lightly interviews you, I would be happy to accompany you."
That act of kindness was finally too much for Delia and she broke down, hiding her face in her hands. As she felt an arm wrap round her, she leaned into sister Julienne's hold. "I'm sorry for falling apart, Sister," she managed to get out between sobs.
Sister Julienne simply offered quiet comfort, allowing Delia to release all the emotions she had been holding onto. It only took a couple of minutes for the young brunette to regain control and she sat up straight to look at sister Julienne directly. "Thank you, Sister. For everything."
"Nurse Busby, you have always been welcome here, and your youth, energy and curiosity has enriched the House." Sister Julienne smiled briefly before returning to her own chair. "Sadly, you are right to be cautious about reputation however. Nonnatus should be seen as trustworthy and discrete for all its patients. I rather fear that should people hear about the nature of this investigation, they will simply come to their own conclusions and then maintain them, no matter what subsequently comes to light."
Sister Julienne shifted slightly, the movement telegraphing her discomfort. "I must ask you not to tell anyone about this investigation, including those here at Nonnatus."
Delia's eyes widened in horror. There was no way she couldn't tell Patsy. "Sister," she protested. "I rely on Patsy, Trixie and Barbara for support. They're my friends."
"And they need to remain above suspicion. If word of this spreads, there could be questions about all of them."
Delia was silently panicking. She wasn't sure she was capable of not saying anything to Patsy, and Barbara now knew that something was up. In fact, Delia was certain that the vicar's daughter would be making a beeline for her room the second she was released from duty today after the set-to they had in the clinic. "So what am I supposed to tell them when I don't go to work? I can't just leave for work before everyone else gets up and return when everyone's gone to bed. There's no such thing as a normal bedtime round here."
Sister Julienne paused for a moment. "You're right. There does need to be a plausible reason for you to remain here. Matron Lightly told me that she was going to advise her team that you had been released to work here in an administrative capacity for a short period to assist with a gap in staff cover. It may require some delicate persuasion on my part with Nurse Crane, but I think I could convince her that you are overhauling the filing systems and developing a proper archiving facility." She cocked an eyebrow at Delia. "Is that something you could do here while you wait for the investigation to be completed?"
Delia shrugged. "Of course. I'm not sure I'd be any good at it. I don't think I'm as meticulous as Nurse Crane or Nurse Mount."
"That is probably a good thing in the circumstances, as I think it will require a rather *creative* mind to understand the current archiving systems before a new one can be devised and developed."
Delia sat back, suddenly suspicious. "This isn't one of those jobs that you've been meaning to get round to for ages but kept putting off, is it?"
Sister Julienne smiled innocently. "I'll let you be the judge of that." She picked up the still unopened envelope from the desk and handed it back to Delia. "In the meantime, I suggest that you allow yourself some time to read this objectively."
Delia reluctantly took back the letter and stood up. "Thank you, Sister," she replied as she headed for the door.
"I'll see you at dinner, Nurse Busby," sister Julienne advised. "And if you need to discuss this further, you should come to me, not the midwives," she warned gently.
It was fortunate that Delia was already looking away as she nodded sharply, as she knew that the despair she felt at hearing that comment was plain to see on her face.
To be continued...