Hi! I would just like to thank every single one of you who have read and followed this story so far 3 It makes me so happy to think that I am making other people happy, providing you all with a story which I hope you enjoy reading. Also I am unbelievably happy to see that I now have 100 followers 3 Thank you all so~ much for reading this story and giving me the confidence to keep it going
Love Tigora7136
As Arthur and Keith slowly made their way towards the camping area, the blonde couldn't help but cast glances towards his now hyper Australian son, his cloudy green eyes shining slightly despite the haze of guilt that fogged over them. Why did he have to lie to his son, his baby... his child. He had never cut himself whilst he was completely drunk, he was always slightly sober when he printed the silver ribbons on his slender arm, his legs, his stomach even his neck. He needed the power of being able to control something, just one thing as everything, everyone around him began to leave him. Smirking slightly Arthur let out a silent breath, smiling when he saw his son hadn't noticed the depressing aura he was letting out.
' I always seem to do this, feeling sad for no god damned reason!' he mentally scolded himself for feeling this way yet again, only succeeding in making himself feeling worse than before ' Why the hell can't I get a grip on these bloody emotions! Alba taught us how to become numb for when the time came for us all to go to war! why the hell can I do it in battle but not here! It's the same thing! like a civil war within my mind why the hell can't I stop feeling!'
A strangled sob managed to fight its way out of Arthur's throat before he could stop it, fear began to fill within him as his eyes quickly shot towards Keith hoping the brunette hadn't heard the noise he had made. His hopes were answered as he noticed his curious son had run off ahead to inspect some small creature burrowing in the uplifted roots of a rather large tree, out of ear shot for the small noise. Coughing slightly to clear his throat of whatever feeling was trapped there Arthur shouted out to his son.
"Keith! come on we are only a few steps away from camp!" True to word, as Arthur looked in front of him, tearing his gaze away from his son, his eyes were caught by thoughs very similar to his own only inches away from his face, Dark red eyebrows furrowed together as both eyes stared at one another. Sighing Arthur straightened his shoulders slightly, glaring at his Irish brother waiting for the Red-headed man to speak first.
"you're late Artie" His voice sounded deeper than usual, monotonous almost as he leaned forward a bit more, obviously forgetting about 'personal space' as he continued to look Arthur in the eye.
"I needed to speak to an Australian about becoming a mime, anything wrong with that Shawn?" his voice matching his brother's as the two stared at one another, neither noticing Keith staring at them, confusion evident in his eyes as his head shook side to side waiting for one of the brothers to move, speak, do anything other than stare at one another.
"erm, where is the camp?" the youngest man out of the three asked, trying to end the awkwardness in front of him, alas his efforts were defeated when Arthur pointed his left arm towards the camp as Shawn roughly mumbled 'that way'. He quickly scurried off without a single glance back as he made his way towards the comfort of a calm Welshman and a hyper Canadian, hoping the bombs wouldn't drop until he was safely away from his 'mummy' and uncle. If he had glanced back he would have been able to catch the amused smirks which both brothers wore as he ran away, their clover and cloudy green eyes watching his retreating form before moving back to study one another, or to be more exact for the clover green eyes to study and the cloudy green eyes to guard themselves from the information gatherer.
"so you gonna tell me why you look like you are about to burst into tears and why Keith has been crying?" Shawn's gently asked as he stood up straight, displaying the rather large height different between the English brother and himself, it was also a sign of dominance over the blonde man in front of him.
" I told you, I had to speak to an Australian about being a mime" Arthur answered cockily, a smirk resting itself defensively on his face, he didn't really need to ask how his brother knew Keith had been crying, the evidence was all over his shoulder, which was still soaked with the salty tears his son had shed for him, yet again. A pang of guilt struck Arthur in his heart, he was able to hide the pain from his 'smug' face, but not from his stinging eyes.
" Hmmm, so I am guessing here, that you asked Keith why he was being so quiet, considering he's never quiet, and you two got into a row about something, he ended up crying, you ended up saying something and hid how much it affected you saying it, am I correct?" speaking quickly, Shawn noted everything which might have happened to his dearest little brother and nephew, not realizing that he had managed to get the basic outline of what had happened along with pushing a small tear out of Arthur's cold eye, the Brit would not allow anymore tears to fall. Swallowing whatever liquid was left in his mouth to wet his dry throat, Arthur allowed his guilt and pain to be unleashed in a quick snap at his concerned older brother, hoping to distract the Irishman with a row.
"well done Shawn, bloody well done, been watching Sherlock lately have we? You have managed to sum up the most recent events of today's weakness session in a few simple words, using them like a fist in my stomach!" Arthur flinched at his own words 'damn that sounded weak.. oh well no point in stopping now'
" But then again, it wasn't you who worked that out was it? hmm, Say hello to Aiden next time you talk to him to find the information you want on somebody, bloody good show though, you managed to dumb it down enough that it actually sounded like you worked it out, ha" The blonde refused to look up at his older brother when he mentioned Aiden, knowing that the man in front of him would probably flinch and either look hurt or enraged. Honestly, Arthur hoped it was the latter of the two options, he needed his brother to be angry at him, to hate him, to storm off and leave him alone. It was easier that way. Alas his self destructive act wasn't working as well as he had hoped when he felt a large hand gently plant itself on top of his head, rustling the blonde locks.
" That wasn't very nice Artie, You know that I don't talk to Aiden unless I really need help. I worked all of that out on my own, I do know quite a lot when it comes down to working out what has happened to someone, it's how Alba trained us all... why do you think that it is weak to cry dearthair?" The words sounded caring and hurt, but soothing, loving to Arthur as they entered his pale ears. They held emotions he felt he didn't deserve at this moment, he had lied to his son, he had made his son cry, he had said hurtful things to his brother, a brother who he had hurt, who had never really hurt him back. He needed to be alone, It's what would be good for him, good for others. He never should have let his brother's take him back into the family all of thoughs years ago, it was their biggest mistake. He knew his brother was reading him again, he always was, how else would he have figured out that Arthur was thinking about weakness, but he always got something wrong, one little insignificant fact wrong.
"Crying isn't weak, Shawn... I am the only thing here that is weak" Taking a shaky breath yet again Arthur gently batted his brother's hand off of his head before turning around and attempting to walk away. It was only when he felt slender fingers wrap themselves roughly around his wrist did Arthur stop mid step, not even bothering to turn his head towards his Irish brother, he could feel the raw emotion from the red-head through his grip.
'Finally' Arthur thought as he awaited his brother's wrath
"The Fuck is wrong with you! You keep acting like you are getting better one minute and then you get like this again! You need to let us fucking help you! we are your BROTHERS for god's sake! You need to fucking let us in so we can fix you, Please Arthur, Albion you need to give us a chance, you're our baby brother you can't keep torturing us like this..." The once powerful yells which emitted from enraged Irish nation, died down to that of a desperate older brother. He didn't like watching their littlest in so much pain and not being able to help.
" I- I can't let you help..." Arthur muttered, not realizing that he had voiced his thoughts in front of his brother. Tears began to prick at his eyes again, forcing his head back he tried to control them, pushing them back into his eyes. A small tug at his wrist pulled Arthur back, making him lose his footing and falling into his brother's chest, his head landing just bellow Shawn's chin as the Red-head wrapped his arms around his broken charge. kissing the top of Arthur's head before scolding him gently.
"Yes, you can.. We aren't going to betray you, we are not America we are your brothers; Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland and rep. Ireland... you can trust us, so please, let us act like your brothers and help you... remember the promise?... 'I swear, even when I draw my last breath I shall never leave you. I always have been and will be with you, even when you don't want me there I shall be. Whether it is next to you or just in the background I shall be there to protect you... this I promise to you' " By the time he had finished his plea, finished repeating the promise which all brothers had managed to drill into their individual minds, tears were freely streaming down Shawn's own face, feeling the salty substance drip down onto his face Arthur gently freed one of his own arms, lifting it up and whipping away thoughs horrible tears from his brother's face, he had done it yet again. Made a family member cry, because of his words. 'I really need to learn to shut up' he thought as he kissed his brothers chin gently, trying to comfort the man.
"ha, you don't need to comfort me lad, It's the other way around, idgit" despite saying this Shawn buried his head into his siblings hair closing his eyes as he took in the scent of tea, cinnamon and forest leaves, tightening his grip on Arthur until he felt the boy relax in his hold.
"I lied to him" Arthur whispered, making Shawn pop one clover green open, a sign he was paying attention, even if Arthur couldn't see it.
"I told him that I used to only... cut myself when I was drunk... I didn't want him knowing it was only a couple of times I drank.. I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry... I lied about the amount of scares, I lied about getting better after that... I LIED TO MY CHILD" The guilt from what he had done managed to push itself forward as Arthur confessed to what had upset him, not feeling any better for voicing what had happened. He was ready for his brother to let go and walk away from him. He felt Shawn's grip slacken around his waist, he was ready to be abandoned. He was not ready, however, to be spun around roughly so he was facing the Irish nation and to be slammed into said nations chest, his head being cradled by large but gentle hands, being shushed, having sweet comforts whispered into his ears along with gratitude, gratitude for admitting to his brother about his difficult times, letting him in ever so slightly, even if it was only out of guilt. It was... nice. Gaining some courage Arthur wrapped his arms half way around Shawn's waist pushing himself further into his brother's chest, feeling the calming breath and steadily beating heart beneath it, it was reassuring and soothing to feel his Irish Brother's heart still beating strong even after all the strain it had been through
"a-are you going to tell Alba and Cymru?" Though it was muffled by Shawn's chest as the red-head forced Arthur's body closer to his own, something the latter of the two thought impossible, the worry of the other half of the united kingdom finding out about this was clear within both Arthur's tone and chosen words.
"hmmm, I won't tell them but only if you promise to stop being a stubborn teenage girl and talk to us when you need us, we are here to help you not to laugh at you, dearthair" The words were spoken in such a way which made them sound less like the caring pleading Arthur's other brothers and sons had been using against him and more like an order, telling Arthur that he had to start trusting his kin, something Arthur was used to through years of battle and working under someone else's rule, something in that type of tone was more comforting to the blonde haired man than all the hugs, all the soothing words which he received from all of his loved ones. It made him feel strong, defiant towards whatever was making him feel so down.
Smirking slightly Arthur pushed himself away from Shawn's chest, his eyes shining determinedly as he announce clearly 'I promise' before leaving Shawn's grip, staring his second eldest brother in the face, smirking cockily as he began to walk away toward the camp site, back toward his worried twin and sons, along with a grinning 'all-knowing' Alba.
Shawn snorted slightly in amusement as he watched his youngest brother strut away from him, overjoyed that Arthur was beginning to get some of his stuck up ways back. Though he managed to hide it well, he and Aiden did communicate much like Arthur had pointed out earlier, but there was no need for his brothers to know that little fact was there.
"best get back before Alba sends out our little Welsh searching squad" Shawn chuckled, shoving his hands into his pockets as he slinked after his brother, smirking as his other self answered him once again.
'I can't wait for the game to begin~ how fun it shall be' The other voice sounded deep and menacing, a child like joy radiating from it at the mention of a new game came for once again, only one group could win this time. A small glint sparked forward Shawn's eyes sharing the same joy that his other self was currently feeling. Oh yes, such fun.