"Nicky, what's the problem?"
Valerie was still elegantly draped around the door frame, her voice calling out crisp and clear as if every sentence was a line in a play.
"Did she just call you 'Nicky'?" Judy hissed.
Nick was standing right in front of her, his back to Valerie, trying to keep Judy's attention on him. This plan, however, was failing miserably.
"I didn't hear a thing," the fox chuckled nervously.
"Nick, Honey, come on!" her voice rang out once more.
"I'm going to kill you, Nick," Judy muttered.
"Okay!" Nick exclaimed. "Can we have a moment, please?"
In very few strides, Nick crossed the room and shut the door, locking Valerie out of the Chief's office before turning around to face a very angry bunny.
"Who the hell is she?"
Nick looked up at the Chief.
"Of all the animals in Zootopia, why her?"
The Chief just shrugged, not really concerned with the question.
"Uh, hello, Nick? Your pregnant wife-to-be asked you a question!"
"Why her, Chief?" Nick pleaded miserably. "And in front of the pregnant rabbit?"
"Nick!"
"Okay, okay! She's just an ex of mine–"
"'Just an ex'? She seems like a little bit more than 'just an ex' to me!"
"She's just a little bit flirty, that's all–"
"And that doesn't worry you in the slightest?"
"No, because–"
"Unbelievable!"
"Could you keep your voice down?" Nick shushed. "She's right outside!"
"Oh, I'm sorry that I'm such an inconvenience, Nick. Let me just go and take calls with my pregnant self while you go run around solving cases with your ex!"
"Why did you just say 'solving cases' in such a sexual manner?"
"So, you are thinking about sex!"
"You're the one who said it!" Nick gasped. "Carrots, it's not like that–"
Judy turned quickly to the Chief, her ears flopping as she did so.
"Chief, how long are they partners for?"
The Chief now looked slightly nervous and uncomfortable, even afraid of Judy in that moment, but he answered anyway.
"Until you, uh, return from your maternity leave, Hopps."
"Oh, wonderful!" the bunny huffed, rounding back on Nick. "You hear that, Nick? You get to screw her for the next six months and then the two and half months after that!"
"I'm not going to screw her–!"
"In the meantime, I'll be staying with your mother."
"Oh God, please don't bring my mother into this."
"Funny, I was just thinking the same thing about Valerie."
"You are hitting below the belt on purpose, and honestly, I am appalled," Nick said with a theatrical shake of his head.
"I don't think this is funny, Nick!"
"I've never been more serious in my life."
"I am emotional and so not in the mood to deal with this!"
"Okay, I hear you–"
A soft knock at the door, followed by Valerie entering the room, interrupted their argument.
"Sorry, I don't mean to intrude, but–"
"Val, can we please just have a minute?" Nick said without thinking.
Oh no.
Nick froze. He felt Judy's anger radiating off of her from where he was standing before she even so much as made a sound. Feeling the tension in the room, Valerie made an exaggerated expression and then closed the door, leaving Nick to face Judy once again. What he found was not pretty.
"'Val?' 'Val?' Are you kidding me, Nick?"
"That was a slip up–"
"Is that how you're going to explain it when you sleep with her?"
"Well," Nick chuckled. "It wouldn't be too hard to slip into that, if you know what I mean. Am I right, Chief?"
The Chief shook his head and gestured for Nick to be quiet, but it was too late; the damage had been done.
"I'm going to actually kill you!"
"That's technically, uh, murder–" the Chief coughed nervously.
Judy suddenly turned her deadly gaze upon the cape buffalo.
"Get out," she hissed as she pointed at the door, surprising everyone.
"This is my office, Hopps! I will not be spoken to like that–"
"Out!"
Much to Nick's horror, the Chief winced slightly and then moved to sulk out of the room without another word.
"Where are you going?" Nick blanched at the Chief. "Don't leave me with her!"
Chief Bogo gave Nick a look that seemed to say, "not my problem," before departing the office, leaving the couple alone. Judy didn't even have time to feel guilty about yelling at her boss before she was on Nick once again. This time, she walked toward him, making him quickly back against the wall in fear.
"Carrots, be rational now!"
"Oh, it's always 'Carrots this' and 'Carrots that!' I'm sick of you acting like I'm special when I'm clearly not!" Judy gestured at the closed door. "This was supposed to be a great day and you had to go and ruin it!"
"I didn't know she was going to show up!"
"You've never even mentioned her, Nick!"
"You've never mentioned any of your previous boyfriends!"
"That's because you're the first, you idiot!"
"I–wait, really? I am?"
"I can't believe you!" Judy huffed angrily.
"I think–"
"I don't care what you think!"
"Okay, but I think that you're just being emotional–"
"Of course, I'm being emotional, Nick, it's called being pregnant!"
"Okay, so you acknowledge that you are being emotional! You know that you aren't really thinking this through right now, so why don't we just sit down," Nick reasoned, now carefully leading Judy to the chair he had been reclining in just moments before. "And relax."
Once seated, Nick began to massage Judy's shoulders.
"See?" he laughed. "All better."
"I'm still mad–"
"Shhh! Just relax."
Nick continued to work the knots from Judy's shoulders for a few more minutes, letting her cool off.
"Chief, you can come back in," he called once he was sure that Judy wouldn't murder him at the earliest convenience.
The Chief and Valerie peered into the room carefully before entering. Once they had established that they were safe, the Chief went back to his desk, while Valerie remained by the door.
"Chief, I'm going to take Judy to my mother's house, and then I will be right back. She'll be back tomorrow, but she just needs some time."
"Be timely, Nicky, we do have a case."
At Valerie's voice, Nick felt Judy tense, and heard the sound of disgust she made. Rubbing her shoulders a little harder now, Nick only nodded in reply before turning back to the Chief.
"I'll be back as soon as possible."
"Fine, Wilde, but be quick about it."
"Will do, Chief."
Nick carefully helped Judy out of the chair and began leading her from the room. Valerie opened her mouth to speak, but Nick caught her attention and mouthed "not a word," making her bite her tongue. Judy glared at Valerie hatefully, which Nick noticed, so he quickly grabbed her by the shoulders and steered her from the room.
"Hey, Judy!"
"Now is really not the time, Clawhauser, she's like a ticking bomb!" Nick yelled back at the cheetah as he raced past the reception desk, still steering Judy by her shoulders.
"Bomb" was a very accurate statement, because as soon as Nick had gotten Judy into the passenger's seat of their SUV and began driving her to his mom's house, she had started yelling again.
"'Be timely, Nicky'! Oh, that stupid bitc–"
"O-okay!" Nick laughed awkwardly. "Guess where we're going, Carrots?"
"To see your mother so I can borrow one of her kitchen knives."
"Funny, but no! We are visiting Grandma Wilde, isn't that right, babies?" Nick cooed lovingly in the direction of Judy's abdomen.
"Don't talk to my children, Nick."
"Mom is going to be so happy to see you."
"You're sleeping on the couch."
"So happy."
The rest of the car trip was filled with unbelievably uncomfortable dead silence as Nick continued to drive, glancing over every now and then to see if Judy was about to strangle him, while Judy stared angrily out of the window with her arms crossed tightly across her chest. After about a ten-minute drive, Nick brought the car to a gentle stop in front of a small house that was painted a luminous light green. The door and the shutters of the house were painted a bright white, and the yard was made up of a luscious lawn that held a garden with several different thriving flowers. The entire area looked very cozy and inviting, but Judy was too upset to really enjoy it all.
"Here we are," Nick chuckled nervously.
He moved to get out and open Judy's car door for her, but stopped when he heard her door open. Without a word or a glance, Judy got out of the car, slamming the door behind her as she did so, and walked up to the front door. Nick watched her angrily saunter up the sidewalk to the wooden front porch.
"Oh, this may have been a horrible idea," he muttered to himself.
Judy knocked on the door and put on her brightest smile, knowing that Nick's mother would love her no matter what. Nick's mother answered just a few seconds later. She was wearing a light blue dress that was covered by a kiwi green apron with white fringes. Judy could smell what she thought were cookies being baked, and could see a very wonderful home just from the limited view she had of the front hall. Mrs. Wilde smiled happily at the sight of Judy, but she also looked concerned.
"Judy! What a surprise!"
"Hello, Mrs. Wilde. I hate to intrude, but may I come in?"
"Of course, is something wrong?"
Judy hesitated slightly.
"Mrs. Wilde, do you know Valerie by chance?"
At the name, realization struck Nick's mother. She gave Judy a look that said, "no way," which Judy answered with a stiff, angry nod. Nick's mother then glanced up at Nick, who was cautiously waiting by the SUV to see if anything major happened. Nick waved with a shy smile, something his mother did not return.
"That skank," she finally whispered.
"Honestly, you could be talking about either one of them and that would still apply," Judy stated haughtily.
"Is it okay if she stays with you for the day?" Nick called to his mother from his place on the street.
Judy turned and looked at Nick, who waved and smiled at her.
"Love you, Carrots!"
"You're still sleeping on the couch!" she yelled back.
Nick gave a fake laugh.
"Always the jokester, isn't she, Mom?"
"Really, Nicholas?"
"What?"
Nick's mother just shook her head in disapproval before turning back to Judy.
"Come on in, Honey, and tell me all about it."