Nothing pisses me off more than a mammal taking advantage of another, especially when it's one of my friends. While the mayor didn't look like she'd been abused by the paws of her captors, I could still tell that it had not been a pleasant experience. Her face remained stern, her posture strong, but her eyes, they were the ones that gave it away. I've known fear, and it was always the eyes that portrayed it the most.

"How did they capture you?" I didn't want to move from here until I got word back from my friends. What was taking them so long?

"I… it was stupid of me. A few hours after you left, I got word that you had returned, and were badly injured. I tried to send Williams to get you and bring you to Doctor Boll, but that's when we heard gun fire. We thought Hope was under attack. Everything happened so fast. I… foolishly went to find you, to try to help bring you back to the town and then I was captured. They…"

Emotion was starting to break through her rigid visage as I saw a tear fall from one of her eyes. "It's ok mayor. We're here for you, and I'll do whatever it takes to bring you back safe."

"It's Hope that I am worried about, what if they hurt someone?"

"Then I'll make sure they never hurt anyone else."

"Those ass-twats will never see it coming! Hey Jezzie. Long time."

"Blanche? How did…" the mayor wiped her eyes as she gave me a small smirk, "you really know how to pick them, don't you Olivia?"

"Trust me, this isn't even the half of it. Now, why the hell hasn't anyone responded to my…" then I remembered. "Fuck! I forgot there's some kind of signal blocker. Unless we can find it, or another way to signal for them, we're on our own. You don't by chance know how many are on this ship, do you mayor?"

"I was blindfolded the entire time, up until they locked me in here."

"Well, time to guess." I activated the sensor and checked how many dots there were. Minus the three of us, I counted at least twenty. That was a bit larger than I thought. I used the Stealth-Boar to get onto the ship, but I couldn't use it on me and the mayor, so we had to take it slow, something I doubt Blanche was capable of. I do admit, I would love to just kill everyone on here for what they did, but the mayor's safety was first and foremost.

"Looks like there are at least twenty, maybe more."

"I can take them all with my tail tied to my back!"

"Yeah, no. We need to use tact and discretion, we need to… where the hell did she go?"

I looked around and Blanche was gone. I caught movement out of the corner of my eye just as I saw her turn down the hall we came from. Fuck! She's gonna get us all killed. I primed my gun. "Keep close mayor and do everything I say, got it?"

"Yes Miss Springs." She should have sounded happy being rescued, but her voice was still very solemn. She was probably concerned about Hope.

"And please, call me Olivia. You may technically be my boss back in Hope, but out here we're friends."

"Okay. How, may I ask, did you run into Blanche?"

"Long story, one that I'll be glad to tell you once we're out of here. Now keep your head down, eyes open, and mouth closed. I have the feeling that Blanche is going to make our escape that much more difficult."

We left the cell and moved past the bodies. I had the urge to pick up the smaller rifle, but it took me forever just to learn how to use this pistol, I didn't have the time to learn that. One of these days I should get Holly to teach me more about the different weapons out here. From the sound of it, she's quite the gun lover.

There was still no sign of Blanche, but she had to be around here someplace. We entered the room with the paintings and saw our first sign of her. The body of a bear was laying on the ground, blood pooling around its head. She was able to take on a bear by herself! I looked at the mayor but she didn't seem to have the same reaction that I was having. Either she was still thinking about her town, or she knew of Blanche's abilities. Either way it wasn't very comforting. At least she's on our side.

I heard commotion outside the door and I peeked out. Mammals were running everywhere, shouting about a ghost. I saw at least two more bodies on the deck, all with the same injury. Maybe she could take them all by herself. I heard a very loud, but squeaky swearing. It sounded like she was in trouble.

"Wait here mayor. Try to find someplace to hide, I'll be back for you. I promise."

"Please be safe Olivia."

I didn't say anything, I just gave her a big, forced smile. Even if Blanche took out a few more that I didn't know about. That left at least a dozen or more Tide Breakers to have to worry about and that was just the ones on the boat. When the other boats get back from chasing an un-mammaled boat, I'm sure those numbers will double. I activated my Stealth-Boar and ran out to where I heard Blanche.

A large rhino had a foot resting on some sort of cage, and inside it I saw Blanche. She may have been small, but the bars on that cage were smaller. I saw her trying to squeeze between two bars but she wasn't able to. No one had spotted the ghostly shimmer yet, so I needed to play my cards just right.

"Little mouse want out? I don't know where you came from, or how you managed to kill three of us in such a short time, but you're mine now. Maybe I'll use your hide as a condom while I fuck that gazelle to death. That's why you're here, isn't it? To rescue her."

"DON'T YOU FUCKING CALL ME LITTLE YOU FUCKING ASS-TWAT! I WILL CHOP OFF THAT DICK OF YOUR'S AND KILL YOU WHERE YOU STAND!"

"I'd like to see you try."

Oh, that fucker is going to die. During his little 'speech', I managed to get closer to him. The Stealth-Boar didn't have much time left, and all I needed was one chance. I moved behind him. No one's seen me. Good. I held the handle of my pistol firmly as I jumped up onto the back of the rhino and held myself there.

"What the fuck! Who…"

I pressed the barrel of my gun against the back of his head and pulled the trigger. The bullet simply tore through the back of his head, silencing him forever. I saw the shimmering of the Stealth-Boar fade as the rhino started to fall forward. I jumped off and landed next to the cage containing Blanche.

"Ok you fuckers! If you don't let us leave peacefully, none of you are going to make it out alive!"

"That crazy rabbit killed the boss!"

That was their leader? He didn't seem that tough to me. Then again I did get him by surprise but you know what they say, the bigger you are, the harder you fall, and he fell like a brick. After freeing Blanche I stepped onto the dead rhino and held my gun at everyone. I felt Blanche scurry up my body and come to a rest on my shoulder.

"Nice one. That ass-twat had it coming, but couldn't you have saved him for me?"

"When were you gonna kill him? Before or after he skinned your hide?"

"What are you waiting for Jimmy?! Fucking blast her!"

I followed where that raider was looking right up to the machine gun that was mounted on the roof of the cabin. It was pointed right for us. This is not going as planned. Didn't I remember someone saying 'cut off the head and the body dies'? I blew the head off of their boss, but the body sure as hell ain't dying. The gun started to spray bullets at us. The rhino was large enough that I jumped behind it and used him as a shield. I felt the impacts of each bullet starting to tear through the corpse. This was not gonna last long.

"I need thirty more seconds and I can stealth us out of here. You think this will hold?"

"No it won't fucking hold another thirty seconds ass-twat! We need to kill them before they kill us!"

Was her solution to simply kill everyone? I'm definitely regretting bringing her along. I may like the thrill of a fight, and sure, I have killed out of anger, and rage, and simple necessity, but if I can find a way out without killing anyone, I'll always try to take that exit. That fucking rhino did have it coming though.

"That gun can't point straight down, so if we can make it to the cabin, we'll be safe from it."

"What about all the other ass-twats, ass-twat?"

"Stop fucking calling me an ass-twat you… you… ass-twat!"

I didn't have time to think of a swear at the moment. I wasn't even gonna ask if she was ready, I simply took off as a few bullets started to make their way through the body, hitting the surface beneath us. Just as I figured, once we got to the wall of the cabin, the machine gun fire stopped. I had another few more seconds until the Stealth-Boar was able to be activated, but I already saw the other pirates charging after me, guns and swords raised. One of them tossed a very large axe at me but I was able to dodge it as it embedded itself into the wall. I tried to pull it out, thinking a melee weapon may be useful but it was really stuck in there. Damn that fucker was strong!

The sounds of rifles started to go off as they got closer, and the axe thrower was chucking more at me. "This is a fine mess you got me into Blanche!"

"You didn't have to rescue me either ass-twat! You should have taken Jezzie and left!"

"I'm not gonna fucking abandon anyone, even if they are a reckless, dangerous fucker like yourself!"

I don't know when it turned into a swear-off, but we were nearly as busy cussing at each other as we were dodging weapon fire. I felt one of the axes skim my back, cutting it enough to send a sharp pain up my spine. That's it!

"Pip-Boar, kill!"

It had been a long time since I last used B.A.T.S. and as the serum entered my body, causing everything to slow, I realized that I had missed this sensation, a lot. I wasted no time as I drew my gun and fired at the axe thrower, not even checking my chance to hit. With increased accuracy and heightened senses, my bullet hit him right in between his eyes. He dropped dead in an instant. Not wanting to let the rest of it go to waste, I managed to take down two more of my attackers just as fast. Then I noticed something. Blanche had left my shoulder, and while everything seemed slower, she was still moving fast. I saw her run up to a tiger and quickly moved up his leg and onto his chest, before finally reaching his neck. He was busy trying to shoot at me, that I don't even know if he knew she was there. She took not one, not two, but all three of her swords and sliced open his neck before jumping off and moving to the next target. She was vicious.

I managed to take out one more of the pirates by the time the chemical wore off, but there were still too many. They must have signaled for help somehow because I saw a bunch of mammals coming over the side of the ship. We had to do something. I needed to signal to the others and let them know what's going on. If only I could find the source of this signal blocker I could destroy or deactivate it and get in touch with them. That's when it hit me.

I should say, almost hit me. The body of a coyote landed next to me, just barely hitting me. I looked up to see where he came from and I saw Mayor Swift hanging out a window. How did she…

"I got the jammer taken care of!"

She… did? I tuned my radio to Onion's frequency. "Hello? Anyone reading this?"

"Miss! You're ok! We couldn't get in touch and were getting worried."

"There was a jammer blocking my messages but it's off now. We got the mayor but we're in trouble!"

I heard silence for a moment before Onion came back on. "Miss, the others are on their way!"

Finally, things were starting to look up. Gun fire in my direction ended up cutting my personal victory party short as I remembered that there were still mammals trying to kill us. I had no idea where Blanche ran off to, and I couldn't stray too far from here without that machine gun trying to kill me, so I had to think. I decided the best thing to do was to get a better idea of the current situation by activating my Stealth-Boar and heading out towards the mammals shooting at me.

"Where did she go?!"

"That cunt must have a Stealth-Boar! Shoot anything that looks suspicious!"

Guess the jig is up. Still, they can't shoot what they can't see. There were at least eight mammals that I could see, and I saw Blanche over near the edge of the boat. She wasn't moving as fast, she was probably exhausting herself, but I have a feeling that she's not the type to admit that. She kept trying to jump up onto her assailants, but they simply swatted her away. I had to help her.

"Pip-Boar, kill."

Once the serum was in full effect, I took aim at the closet one of the three. A hole formed in the back of his head as he fell to the ground. The other two started to react to the sudden demise of their companion but I was faster. I made a shot but it missed as he started to bend downward to pick up something. He was dangerously close to the edge so I decided to use that. I took a shot at his leg and it caused him to buckle. He tried to stabilize himself, but he reached for air and fell over the side of the boat. I went to shoot the last one but my gun only clicked. Fuck I was out of ammo!

I went to change the magazine as the serum wore off and but the wolf started to charge me. He was pissed and was gaining ground faster than I could ready my weapon. He was almost upon me when a shadow passed by, plucking the wolf from the ship. Drake had arrived!

"'Livi!"

I looked behind me as I saw Holly, armed to the teeth, taking shots at anything that moved. She was mostly paying attention to me while it looked like she was firing blindly, but all of her bullets made contact with a pirate. She ran over to me and dropped her guns and gave me a quick hug before picking them up again.

"Holly! Where are the others?"

"Drake dropped me off but the others will be here shortly. Where's the mayor?"

"I'm here, and I got company!"

Mayor Swift came running out of a door being chased by two badgers. They were both armed with very large knives, but the mayor was able to keep ahead of them, but only slightly. I tried to take aim at the two pursuers, but the mayor was running to erratically that she kept blocking my view. They were also starting to catch up to her.

"Drake!"

He flew over me as I pointed towards the mayor. I wanted him to grab her so that I could get a clean shot at the badgers, but I guess calling his name wasn't really laying out a plan because instead he simply grabbed both of the badgers and dropped them into the water below. That works too. Drake landed right next to me and Holly. The mayor didn't react the way I thought she would, but I could still see the fear, or at least concern, in her eyes.

"Is that… did you… let me guess, the 'other half of it'?"

"You guessed it. Drake, Mayor Swift. Now let's finish this rescue operation."

I heard loud roaring noises coming from the side of the boat. I ran over to the edge while grabbing the now heavily panting Blanche and put her on my shoulder as I looked out. There were at least two dozen Tide-Crashers heading straight for us. How the hell many boats did they have? Machine gun fire reminded me that there was still a mounted gun above us. I went to fire back at it, but instead Holly just casually tossed a grenade over her shoulder.

"What the…" A loud explosion silenced the gunner along with the gun.

"Did you just…"

"Yup." She said it so casually too.

"That's a lot of Tide Breakers. Even more than I think we could handle. They really need to make a smaller missile launcher. Those things are just so damn heavy to lug around everywhere."

"If we survive this, how about I build you your own personal rocket launching robot?"

"Really? That would be so cool!"

I was about to remark on that comment when suddenly one of the incoming ships exploded, followed by another. The loud sounds of engines roared overhead as I saw three Guardian aircraft begin strafing the boats, firing missiles and machine guns. Half of the boats tried to escape while the other half tried to fire back, but without the support of this ship, they were as good as dead.

A fourth aircraft floated down in front of us. Stalker Logan was in the side opening. "Need a lift?"

Logan helped the mayor and Holly into the ship, but as I grabbed his paw to climb into it, I felt a sharp pain hit my leg. Holly quickly turned towards the source of the pain and fired some shots. Logan tried to catch me but missed and I plummeted into the waters below. The second I hit the water, my Pip-Boar's radiation detector went nuts. I did my best to keep my head above water, not wanting to risk swallowing the tainted water, but the pain in my leg was making it hard. A shadow fell upon me as Drake grabbed me by the shoulders and pulled me from the water. He set me back onto the boat while Logan and Holly grabbed me and moved me into the aircraft.

"You ok 'livi?"

"I feel… my leg hurts. I think I'm also going to be sick."

"It's just a little radiation poisoning it'll…"

I threw up out of the craft. I really was starting to feel ill. All those rads in such a short time was a major shock to my system. Not being able to eat much was also not helping as I started to dry heave.

"We need to get her back to HQ immediately!"

"Drake… you… coming?"

"Drake. Fly. No. Fly."

"He… wants… too…" I could barely speak. Every time I opened my mouth, a lot more than words wanted to come out.

"Don't worry, we radioed HQ when the comm-array came back online and briefed Lazlo of the situation. We told them if a single deathwing was following us, not to attack. He was very confused but when I told him who was with it, he said he would make sure to inform the outer defenses."

"Thank… you."

"Don't speak 'livi. Logan, take us there now."

"Nate…"

"Him, Mark and, Onion are on another Tac. They were coming to meet you when the operator spotted the boats. They'll meet us there. Hang in there 'livi."

I didn't think there was anything left in my system to be ejected, but the sudden jolt of the aircraft moving showed me otherwise as I vomited out the craft again. My stomach was burning and now my head was starting to hurt. This was going to be a long ride.

I had stopped wanting to throw up by the time we got to the Guardian base, but my head was in full-on migraine mode. Every single light I saw was causing it to throb with pain, and every time I tried to move, the entire world started to spin. I hope I wasn't dying. I had so much do to, but then again, if I died, there would be no reason for the Legionaries to hurt anyone. But if I died...what would happen to… Nate?

"Get her into the decontamination room immediately! We need to purge her system before they impact her internal organs!"

I had to close my eyes to block out the pain the lights were causing. I couldn't move, I could barely think, I felt horrible, and to think all it took was a few seconds in irradiated water. I'm never going back to that place again. Fuck Darkwater. Fuck radiation.

I felt something get slipped over my face as I tried to open my eyes. The light was much dimmer, but it still hurt my head. I saw a bunch of mammals surrounding me, all dressed in white gowns as I watched them strip off my clothing and jab me with needles. I was breathing very heavily from whatever was on my face, but I was still breathing. I was also getting tired. So. Very. Tired. I closed my eyes.

"'Livi? You awake 'livi?"

"H… Holly?"

I tried to open my eyes, but they felt so very heavy. I tried to lift my arms but felt them being weighed down as well. My breathing was still hard as if my chest was made of stone. I was still alive. I think. I tried my eyes again and managed to get them open. I couldn't see much, my vision was very out of focus. I tried to see where the voice came from, but all I could see were outlines.

"Holly… where are you?"

"I'm right here 'livi. So are Nate and Mark."

"Is everyone… okay?"

"Yeah, we all made it back alive. Mayor Swift is resting, and Blanche is with her. Drake is in the Guardian's garage, for some reason they didn't want to give him free run of the place, but Drake was just happy to find a place to 'hang'. Onion is around here someplace. I think he might have shorted himself out worrying about you. We were all worried, but the doctors say you'll be fine."

I felt a paw touch mine. At first I thought it might have been Holly's since she was the only one speaking, but it felt, familiar. It felt, nice. "N… Nate?"

"I'm here Olivia."

"He wouldn't leave your side 'livi. Although I did have to force him when they were dressing you. Ain't that right puff-tail?"

"I… I didn't look, I promise."

My vision was finally coming back as the faces of my friends became clearer. Holly and Mark were standing near one side of the bed I was in, while Nate was standing the closest, his paw holding mine. I felt myself smile. I'm glad they were alright.

"Hey Nate. Remember that promise?"

"I… uh…"

I saw that my arm was partially immobilized due to a bunch of small tubes jutting from it, but I had just enough freedom to reach up and grab Nate by his shirt, pulling him down so that his face was right in front of mine. "Thank you for watching over me." I then kissed him. I don't know if it was whatever drugs were running through my system keeping the pain at bay, or if I finally found the courage to do it, but it felt like the kiss lasted forever, and I didn't want it to stop.

"Miss Springs, a word if you… oh, I can come back later if you want."

Nate jumped backwards, my paw still grabbing his shirt. It caused the tubes to be wrenched from my arms, and despite any pain-relievers in my body, it didn't help stop this new pain.

"Fuck!"

"You alright 'livi? Nate, why did you go and hurt her?"

"I… it was an accident!"

The doctor quickly ran over and injected me with something that started to dull the pain. Nate looked horrified at what he did, but I did my best to smile in order to reassure him it was ok. Rather than trying to stick the tubes back into my arm, the doctor instead just put some kind of cream on the wounds and bandaged it up. After about fifteen minutes of patching me up, I was starting to feel better.

"Okay Miss Springs, I have some… news to share with you. It would be best if I told this to you in, private."

He was looking over at Holly, Nate, and Mark when he said that. "No. Anything you have to say, you can say it in front of them."

"Well, if the patient doesn't care about her own confidentiality, who am I to argue. Now, your entire body was exposed to massive amounts of radiation, and this can pose potential hazards. Ghoulification, mutations, death, but thankfully you're not only alive, but not a ghoul either. That leaves us with the other side effect of radiation."

"Don't tell me I am going to grow an extra limb!"

"Relax, it's not that type of mutation. Plus, that's very rare, and usually the patient dies before it gets too bad." I gave him a look that caused him to change subjects, "… we had to run a deep genetic scan to make sure that the radiation didn't negatively affect your genetic structure. The most common cases of radiation poisoning is a weakened immune system, lethargy in muscle mass, and brain damage. Rest assured that none of those are the case for you."

"Then why all the secrecy about it?"

"You, are a special case. We had to run the tests three times to confirm our findings. While there seems to be no harmful repercussions of this discovery, quite the opposite, there seem to be benefits occurring due to this finding, your genetic structure has been modified to include…"

"Damn it, I'm a mechanic not a doctor! Get to the point!"

"Miss Olivia Springs, it appears that you are part… fox."

—

Fallout: Zootopia After Show

Featuring:

'Stripes in the Morning'

'Max Attempting to Cover for a Drunken Zebra'…

[Max]

"Good evening ladies and Gentlemammals… So you might notice this voice isn't your regular host, well… You'd be right. It seems our normal commentator of the strange and sufferingly annoying decided to hunt down a supposed lost treasure trove of Alcoholic BunnyBurrow Cider, and found it! Where upon he promptly drunk himself into what could only be described as an alcoholic coma. I'm sure his liver isn't gonna be thanking him anytime soon. Anyhow folks, it seems that the higher powers have left me in charge of this little jaunt about the Wasteland and I for once prepared in advance! Hell, I even REQUESTED an interview before paw… Apparently most mammals take exception to a Zebra randomly appearing in their personal lives! Go figure… Though I have to admit with our guest tonight I was rather surprised when he accepted our request and even invited us down to his compound! So without any further ado, allow me to introduce none other than the famed Chief of the Wasteland's most famous defenders, the Steel Guardian's very own Chief Maximilian Lazlo. Sir, it's both an honor and a pleasure to meet you, though I understand it's come under some rather… Trying circumstances at the moment? I understand it's being taken as Guardian Business and I don't wish to pry too heavily, but there were a large number of your aerial transports spotted heading toward Darkwater not too long ago, if you deem it appropriate would you care to elaborate as to what happened?"

[Lazlo]

"A small group of raiders called the Pirates of Darkwater had taken a person of importance and we were simply launching a rescue party. To ensure their safety, I will not reveal who it was, but rest assured we were able to rescue said mammal quickly and without any issues."

[Max]

"It would seem that you and your Guardians have been hard pressed lately. Not to mention that ever since the now famous 'Hero of Hope' has come onto the scene of the Wasteland, a lot of stirring up has been happening, especially involving the Legionary Mercenary group. I know that you don't wish to expound upon any current operations, but would you be willing to tell us if the Guardians are looking into this matter? It seems these mercenaries have been riling everyone up and turning every stone imaginable in search of our Hero, they've even ended up accosting me on a number of occasions."

[Lazlo]

"Right now they're a top priority. The Guardians don't care for mercs, but we typically stay out of each other's way for the most part. With the few exceptions of someone too big for their britches trying to hire them to assault my soldiers, we very rarely have to deal with them. Since this bounty was placed on Miss Springs, they have been causing trouble left and right. Between that, some major repairs being needed on Darkwater's perimeter, and a few other need-to-know events, we have been stretched rather thin. With that said, I would like to tell everyone out there that the Guardians are always looking for more members to fill the ranks. If any of you are interested, please don't hesitate to contact one of our recruitment agents. We typically have at least one at most major settlements, if not close by."

[Max]

"Would you mind telling us a bit about yourself and your Guardians sir? Let the Wasteland know who the few defenders of their lives are? Give them a little insight into why you all still insist upon trying to fight the wrongs of this world, despite how overwhelming they've been for us. So few actually get to know you and your Guardians and would love to learn more about you, to know that the mammals out there fighting, are trying to fight for a better tomorrow."

[Lazlo]

"I'll be happy to tell you anything that is deemed fit for public knowledge. The Steel Guardians are an old group, created at the height of the war when mammals of all species were afraid for their own safety. It was formed when our founder, Chief Bogo, created a joint task force of the Zootopia Police Department's finest mammals. Ever since, we have kept that tradition alive, using our technology to not only protect the citizens of the wasteland, but to help build a better future. We do not take our jobs lightly. Every member is paw picked according to stringent guidelines, and those we believe have the potential to develop into great a mammal are provided with all the training and teaching they need to unlock their potential. Many a mammal who have joined our ranks did so in order to avoid a life best fit for a raider."

[Max]

"I also understand you've had a long standing relationship with the Valiant Family, would you care to elaborate any on that? I've heard tell that you see at least one of them as your own kit, though I'd understand if that's going a bit too far with that question."

[Lazlo]

"Ah, you know them I take it? They get around but until recently, I never really figured them to be the friend making type. Guess a certain rabbit has helped change their minds. I for one am glad for that. Sticking with family is a very respectable act, but out here in the wasteland, you need all the help you can get in order to survive. I saw potential in them, and had wanted to make them, or at least one of them, a Guardian, but just like Miss Springs, they declined my offer. I respect their decision. While we make sure that all Guardians are well taken care of in regards to food, shelter, medicine, and equipment, this is not an easy job, and many of our soldiers have had to give up much of their lives in order to protect this land. Leaving friends and family behind can be difficult, but knowing they are under the protection of the Guardians can help alleviate some of that. Plus we are not heartless when it comes to family. Every Guardian is guaranteed at least one week minimum of leave time, with the ability to extend that by performing duties above and beyond the call of duty. Remember folks, being a Guardian isn't a job, it's a way of life."

[Max]

"Ah..haha...I er, wouldn't say I know them on a personal level sir, more that my less than erstwhile companion seems to feel the absolute need to annoy any-mammal making a name for themselves with an utter disregard for that mammal's privacy. He persists despite my repeated threats and actions involving the denial of coffee and alcohol rations. Alright sir, I don't wish to take up too much of… Oh… Oh they didn't, how… That God damn Zebra. I apologize sir, the last question I have on here is rather… Ridiculous if you don't mind me saying and it seems somehow our producers were able to slip a question from our… Rather invasive normal host into my notes… With a warning that if I fail to ask this, I shall summarily be flogged until Morale improves, then fed to the nearest Deathwing colony. I do apologize for this Chief Lazlo, but apparently a number of our ahem… Listeners would really love to know… Is there something romantic going on between you and Mayor Swift? Oh you have GOT to be kidding me…

[Lazlo]

"Ahem… while the mayor is rather attractive… as you can see I am well past my prime. I may still be fit for duty as the leader of the Steel Guardians, but I fear my time alone has made me rather unfit for a relationship. Plus… I'm not her type… if you know what I mean. You… aren't gonna air that last part, are you?"

[Max]

"I promise you sir, I'll see what I can do, but as soon as the recordings are out of my paws our producers seem to throw all logic out the door along with the kitchen sink. I'll be sure the express my deepest sympathies and apologies to Miss Swift should they end up leaving it in. Alright, that's all the time we have for this little broadcast ladies and mammals! I again wish to express my deepest thanks and apologies for this interview Chief Lazlo, it's been an honor once again. Folks, it's been a pleasure hosting for you all and should Stripes wake up in time for the next broadcast I'll be sure to do my best to antagonize the living stuffing out of him for that last question… If he doesn't happen to wake up in time however, heh, well let's just say this fox still has the recording of me beating his arse half way across the southern Wastelands. I'm sure more than a few of you will just love to hear it! And as always, we love to hear from our fans so be sure to send us a holo-recording of any mammals you might want to hear more from! As a final note to all of our listeners out there in the Wasteland Chief Lazlo and the Guardians are always looking for new recruits who want to make the world a better place for all of us! Until next time, this is your temporary host Max Redbridge signing off!"