Another second in the sunshine,
A decade in the dark taking part in a dream
Have you forgotten what she looks like?
Or do you only see what you want to believe?

Hurts – Better Than Love

Chapter 44

What's love but a second hand emotion

I had to really struggle before I managed to shove Damon out from the carriage, he had almost passed out. Unfortunately his legs couldn't hold him and he fell down on his stomach in the middle of the street. I sighed and asked the driver to help me, he was an elderly man. Sure I could have carried Damon inside by myself, but that would have looked strange to say the least, I couldn't draw that kind of attention in front of our home. The driver jumped down and gave Damon a disapproving look.

"No need to worry, sweetheart," he said sympathetically. "We'll get your father home."

"Thank you, sir," I replied smiling.

"Eva…" Damon murmured. "I can't see…"

The driver shook his head and bent down in order to help him up.

"Eva…"

"I'm here," I said and touched Damon's hair. "It's alright, we're almost home."

The driver couldn't lift Damon by himself, so I had to go inside and wake one of the servants up. Together the two men carried him to his room. I gave the driver a generous tip and told the servant to go back to sleep, I could take it from here. Damon was lying on his back; I took his shoes and his jacket off and started to clean his dirt-smudged face with a wet towel.

"What are you doing…" he muttered while slowly opening his eyes.

"That's a good question," I huffed. "I should have left you in that hellhole."

He didn't say anything, but he looked so miserable that I couldn't stay mad at him. We have had our ups and downs during the last 14 months, but we were a family, in some way he was like a child to me. I had taught him how to be a vampire and he had done a wonderful job playing the part of my father. He drank much less these days, at least usually, but three days ago he had gone hunting and hadn't come home. I had looked everywhere, worried sick that something terrible had happened to him, but no, he had been drinking in a brothel.

"I'm sorry, Eva," he murmured.

I pressed my lips together.

"Do you have any idea how worried I was?"

He wasn't looking at me.

"Yes, I'm sorry."

"Why did you do it?"

He was quiet for a long while before answering.

"I… I saw her."

I raised my eyebrows.

"Who?"

"Katherine. I was so sure that it was her, I went after her, but she just…disappeared."

"Oh honey…"

I placed the wet towel on the bedside table and climbed onto the bed.

"You told me yourself that she died," I said gently and started to stroke his messy hair. He sighed and rolled on his side, placing his head on my lap. His arm wrapped around my waist, like I would have been a pillow. I allowed him to stay there and kept stroking his hair.

"I was so sure…" he muttered.

"I know, sometimes our mind plays tricks on us. We see what we want to see."

Lord knew that was true, for so many times I had almost ran to a strange man who had looked just like papa or Klaus from behind or some blonde woman who had looked just like Rebekah. A part of me still hoped that they would one day come and get me home. They would tell me how much they loved me and how much they had missed me. Yes, it was a nice fantasy, but they didn't miss me any more than Kol did. Apparently it had been easy for him to simply abandon me and the rest of his family as well.

I still had the sapphire necklace, but I didn't wear it anymore; I kept it in the small box which entailed some little memento from every member of my former family. Papa's book, which he had read to me before I had learned to read by myself; Utopia by Sir Thomas Moore, Rebekah's scarf and one of Klaus' sketches, a portrait of my pony, Achille. He had given it to me many years ago after we had once again argued about some foolish thing. I hadn't opened that box for a long time, it was too painful.

"You'll find someone else," I assured and tapped Damon's back.

"I don't want anyone else," he muttered. "I love her."

"I know you do, but…"

"No," he muttered sleepily. "There are no buts in love…."

In the next second he was asleep. Carefully I lifted his head in order to move away, I tucked him in and kissed his forehead before jumping on the floor. I was exhausted, but instead of going to my own room, I went to the balcony. My chair was next to the railing, as always. I climbed onto it and leaned my elbows on the railing. The night was chilly and peaceful; I closed my eyes and relaxed. Love… I truly felt sorry for Damon. Thankfully I was smarter; I had ceased to hope to ever find love. What was the point when I looked like this?

The best I could hope to find was companionship and I had found that. For a moment I almost allowed myself to think about papa, Klaus, Rebekah and Kol, but fortunately I managed to stop myself in time. Still a one stubborn tear rolled down my cheek. I was just about to wipe it away when I sensed someone looking at me. Immediately I opened my eyes and looked around, but I couldn't see anyone, the street was empty. I frowned and looked again, I was sure that I had sensed something. No, I couldn't see anyone. I sighed and jumped down, I wanted to go to bed.

After a moment of hesitation, I headed to Damon's room instead of my own. Sometimes I needed to be close to someone and he didn't usually mind me sleeping in his bed. Not that I did very often, only when I was very lonely. He was still asleep when I climbed next to him and snuggled against him under the covers. He sighed in his sleep and wrapped his arms around me. It felt nice; Klaus and I had often slept like this. No, I couldn't think about him, I didn't want to think about anything. Fortunately three days of worrying had exhausted me so badly that I fell asleep almost immediately.

Hiding in the bushes. Kol Mikaelson, feared and ruthless vampire was hiding in the bushes. The thought was so ridiculous that he almost laughed. He had watched Eva and the two humans helping this drunken dark-haired man into a nice looking two-storey house. What the hell was going on, who was this man? For the first time in a very long time, Kol had no idea what to do. Eva was so close; all he had to do was enter that house. His siblings were probably there as well, where else would they be, they would never abandon Eva. He had abandoned Eva… For her own good.

Yes, that was what he had kept telling himself for all these years, she would be better off without him. He certainly hadn't been better off without her; she was his, his soulmate. That was like some cruel joke. She hadn't changed at all, of course she hadn't. He had spent decades traveling around Europe, trying to find a way for her to age, but there didn't seem to be a way. That didn't change the way he felt for her, she was his Eva. There was no way he would let her go again.

He was trying to decide what to do now when he suddenly saw her small figure at the balcony; she had climbed onto something in order to see over the railing. She looked so peaceful when she closed her eyes, but there was a tear rolling down her cheek. He frowned, had someone hurt her? Suddenly her eyes flew open and she looked around, like she would sense that she wasn't alone. He stayed completely motionless; he couldn't gather enough courage to face her. Damn coward…

She looked around again, but didn't notice him and went back inside. When she closed the balcony door behind her, he finally managed to move again. Determinedly he inspected all the entrances to the house and broke the lock in the kitchen door. He could enter the house, which meant that a vampire had to own it. After a quick inspection, he noticed that there wasn't a trace of his siblings downstairs, he only found few sleeping humans. He couldn't even pick up the scent of his siblings. Where the hell were they?

Silently he went upstairs, but they weren't there either. He found a room that had to be Eva's; the furniture had been made to meet her needs. She wasn't there. He frowned and kept looking. Finally after checking two other rooms he found her. She had curled up against this dark-haired man, his arms were around her. They were both sleeping peacefully. Kol froze; he couldn't believe what he was seeing. The dark rage filled his mind, how dared this bastard to touch her, she was his! He lost all control and zoomed next to the bed. A furious growl left his throat when he grabbed Eva.

"Get your filthy hands off my girl!"