FutureOlympian: I know, poor Tony :( and Thank you!
Nikos Pyrr: Thank you so much for your wonderful review :) It made my entire day. I'm so overjoyed that you are enjoying my story
When she had been told it was a condo, this wasn't at all what she had been expecting.
It was a sad wooden house that tilted to one side. There was a bench on the small porch that seemed hardly used and the door was painted obnoxious, chipping yellow paint. Everything about it was run-down, but it had a special quaint feeling to it that many houses lacked.
Pepper thanked the driver with a large tip. Saniya jumped as the car door slammed shut. Her hand was stuck to her waist, a close reach to her gun.
"He doesn't have cable or internet," Pepper told her as she came to her side. "I think he should hear it from us. The media is going to twist the facts and I want him to know the truth."
Saniya didn't have the heart to tell her that Tony was dead, just as the news was going to report. "Did we have to bring her?" She jerked her thumb back towards Maya who was, once again, watching them closely.
Pepper's eyes hardened with resolve. "Do you remember what she said when SHIELD arrived? She has nowhere else to go." She leaned in closer so that her words couldn't be overheard. "Besides, she has a concussion. She can't be left alone."
"I don't trust her," Saniya whispered back.
Pepper bit her lip. "Tony." Saniya's whole body curled at the name. "Tony seemed to trust Maya. Trust that, at least."
While that reasoning worked for Pepper, Saniya found it much harder to simply trust Tony's judge of character. However Tony had known Maya, she was still a stranger to Saniya. A stranger she knew almost nothing about. A stranger that could not be trusted right after meeting her. It boggled her mind how Pepper didn't think the same way.
There was a faint limp in her walk to the porch. The first step creaked as she placed her boot on it. Saniya flinched, then peered over her shoulder. Pepper was almost smiling while Maya hooked her arm around hers. She scowled at the porch, feeling filthy about how much she hated Maya making Pepper smile, for gaining her trust so easily. The second step nearly collapsed under the force she stomped her foot. Saniya knocked on the door hard enough to turn her knuckles red.
Then, a couple moments later, she knocked a second time. Louder this time.
Maya and Pepper were right behind her now. She felt their eyes on her. Saniya pounded her fist on the door again. It rattled on its hinges.
Bruce pulled the door open, taking in the sight of the three women, dirty with dust and scrapes. His eyes widened with shock. "Saniya, Pepper, what happened to you two?"
To her credit, Pepper's voice barely trembled. "Can we come inside. I- we need to tell you something important."
Bruce stepped aside and let the women into his rented home. Saniya felt her heartbeat quicken as she took in the room. The windows overlooking the ocean were too large. It was perfect for any sniper to shoot them through. Then, she noticed the lack of lights throughout the entire home. It would be too easy for an overeager terrorist to sneak by them in the shadows. Not to mention that none of the curtains were drawn on the curtains overlooking the road. Everything that could be wrong with a hideout was there.
She closed her eyes and inhaled through her nose. Saniya reopened them with enough calmness to see the shack as more than a war zone.
Compared to his room in Stark Tower, this was lived in. The back door was wide open, letting in a cool draft. There was a wet towel hanging over one of the kitchen chairs. In the sink was a stack of dirty dishes and Bruce's notes were organized on a coffee table. Saniya's shoulders began to release their tension. This felt like a real home, and there was no safer place in the world than in the home of Bruce Banner.
Maya ran a hand through her hair. Specks of dirt fell from her head. "Do you have a bathroom I can freshen up in?"
Bruce nodded and pointed her towards a door in the back. "Who's that?" he asked when the bathroom door shut.
"Maya Hansen," Pepper answered. She took a seat on the old leather couch, dangerously close to crying. Bruce's eyebrows drew together as he took a seat next to her. "There's something we-" she glanced at Saniya who refused to take a seat, instead pacing by the windows, "-need to tell you about. I-I" Pepper dropped her face into her hands.
"Pepper, are you alright?" Bruce asked, despite knowing that of course she wasn't.
Pepper went into a long explanation of everything that happened, from the explosion till the SHIELD agents' arrival. Saniya didn't say a word despite Pepper leaving clear openings in the conversation for her to tell her side of the story. She was more preoccupied with staring at passing cars and peaking into neighbors' windows.
Finally, Pepper was coming to an end of the story as Saniya paced the room for the last time. "They're already searching. It's only been a couple of hours but they haven't found anything yet. I... I saw something come out of the water. Saniya doesn't believe me, but I know-"
SLAM.
There was silence after Saniya had stormed out of the house. She leaned against the door. After several moments, she heard Bruce's worried voice and Pepper responding. She was happy that she couldn't make out the words. It was bad enough hearing their tone of voice.
Saniya walked off the porch. She stared at the road. It would be so easy to leave. So incredibly easy.
She wanted to. She wanted to go back to New York where she felt safe. The Mandarin had made his point by attacking Tony, but she couldn't help but feel that he wasn't through with them yet. Pepper accused her of being paranoid when she had told her what she thought. Sometimes she wondered if she was the only one taking the threat seriously.
But that was the biggest reason why she didn't flag down the next car to hitchhike back home. No one else was seriously considering that the Mandarin might come back to finish what he started. They were close to Tony so why wouldn't they be targets? Besides, they had survived. Terrorists usually didn't take too kindly to survivors.
If Pepper wasn't going to be on her guard, then someone had to do it for her. Saniya brushed a stray tear away. She owed that to Tony, at the very least.
She turned as the front door creaked opened. It was Bruce. As soon as he shut the door, she crossed her arms and drew circles in the dirt with the toe of her boot.
"How are you feeling?"
"Like crap," she replied.
Bruce took slow steps towards her, looking much calmer than her. That was saying something since he was the one who turned green with rage. He slipped his hands in his front pockets. "Do you want to talk about it?"
She shook her head.
He was standing in front of her now. If she wanted to, she could rest her head on his shoulder, and oh how she wanted to.
"Hey," he said softly, "it's going to be okay."
"Like hell it is," she muttered back. She sniffled and her vision became blurry. "Tony's dead," she said finally, voice croak and all. Bruce flinched as if she had punched him. "He fell into the ocean with a whole mansion on top of him. He is- was amazing, but not even Iron Man could get out of that."
"They haven't found him yet. We won't know for sure until they do."
Nobody could walk away from that, she was sure of it. Even if they were encased in a metal body suit. Bruce wasn't going to be convinced overwise, neither was Pepper, so she simply nodded her head and kept her morbid thoughts to herself.
She cleared her throat. "Do you want to know something awful? Not once did I try to help Tony. I was the first one out the door." So much for keeping her thoughts to herself. Bruce watched her with steady eyes. His gaze was enough to weigh her down like she was made of lead. "I'm a horrible person," she said, coming to the sudden realization. "I-I know that sounds really self-pitying, but what type person doesn't at least try to do something? I have abilities. I could have done anything other than save myself." Her eyes widened. "I didn't even try to help Pepper save Maya. I-"
Bruce pulled her in for the tight hug to cut her off from speaking. For a brief moment, her arms hang limp. Then, she grasped onto him as tightly as he was holding her. She buried her face in his shirt.
He cradled her head. "Do you know what I like about you?"
"What?" Her voice was muffled but he managed to hear it.
"You're strong. You have so much determination. You can do anything you put your mind to, but you're also pragmatic." Bruce threaded his fingers in her hair. "If you didn't do anything heroic, it was because you knew you couldn't. You're not a horrible person for knowing your limits."
Her pragmatism didn't excuse ditching Maya and Pepper, nor how it had been within her limits to help Tony. It just made her a coward. A coward who could jump off a building without batting an eye, but wouldn't jump into danger for her friends.
Fury had put it best, all those months ago: she was no hero.
Saniya plastered a fake grin on her face. Bruce raised an eyebrow as he pulled away from the hug. It was undoubtedly more of a grimace than a smile. "Sorry I sounded like a whiner," she apologized.
He shook his head. "If you ever want to talk, I'll gladly listen. That's what friends are for."
A soft, true smile settled on her face. The creases around his eyes smoothed, worry mostly vanished. "Thank you. I mean it." Saniya's foot tapping resumed. "I've never really had anyone I can just talk to. I mean, I have Dorie, but she's not good at listening when things get emotional."
"What about Marsha?"
Saniya nearly jumped at the name. She began walking back towards the house. "I mean... uh... yeeaaah. Marsha's definitely one of those people... who..." There was an unnatural bounce in her steps as she tried to seem unaffected by her sister's name. "Is Maya done cleaning up?"
Bruce caught on to the quick subject change. His eyes narrowed suspiciously. Still, he placed a hand on her lower back and together they walked up the porch steps. "I've been meaning to ask you about that. Who is she?"
"One of Tony's old girlfriends who was in the attack with us," Saniya answered. "I think Pepper feels sorry for her."
His eyes roved over her face as his hand was on the doorknob, not turning just yet. "Do you feel sorry for her?"
"I mean, yeah, a little bit. But if you're asking in a roundabout way if I trust her, then the answer is a resounding no." Saniya bit her lip. "It's just weird. She came to tell Tony something important and is now latching herself to Pepper like a freaking koala. I don't trust that."
Bruce nodded thoughtfully.
Her hand wrapped over his and turned the doorknob. And when she saw Maya and Pepper sitting on the couch together, the short-lived bubble that had shielded them from reality burst
Pepper managed a small grin. "There's still enough hot water if you want to take a shower."
A shower sounded amazing. In fact, nothing sounded nicer than washing away the grime and dirt that layered her skin. But when she thought about Pepper being left alone with Maya, her heart nearly burst out of her chest with panic.
Not alone, she corrected, with Bruce.
Bruce met her eyes. He nodded as if he knew what she was thinking.
So, she took a shower with the peace of knowing that Bruce would Hulk out if Maya tried anything devious. Her gun was placed on the sink and she moved the curtain in a position where she could see it at all times. The only thing in the shower was a bar of soap that smelt like oatmeal. Better than nothing, she supposed, and began cleaning herself.
Outside the bathroom door was a short knock. Saniya glanced around the curtain with narrowed eyes. "Who is it?" she called out.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to bother you," Bruce said. Her shoulders dropped. "I have some clothes for you. They won't fit, but Pepper found some safety pins."
"Thank you," she said. Saniya spread the curtain fully. "You can set them on the counter."
Bruce cleared his throat. "I think it's better if I leave them outside the door." An almost devilish smirk was on her face when she pictured him blushing.
When she had finished her shower, she realized he had been completely correct. The sweatpants pooled over her feet while her torso was lost in a button-down shirt. Pepper had been kind enough to help her hem the bottom of the sweatpants.
After that, it was Pepper's turn to take a shower. Without the businesswoman to entertain her, Maya had to resort to speaking to a hostile Saniya and an apologetic Bruce.
"Banner," she said with shock after finding out his last name. "Banner, as in the Avengers?" Maya leaned back on the couch. She was seeing the scientist in a new light.
"So?" Saniya said, snippy.
Bruce placed a hand on her arm, giving Maya a trademarked apologetic glance. "Yes, that's me."
"You turn green!"
His smile was tense. "I'm aware."
Maya blinked rapidly. "I don't understand. That monster is so much larger than you. That's not possible. All that mass cannot come out of nowhere. How does it work?"
"He has a name," Saniya said, already becoming defensive on Bruce's behalf. "The Hulk is not a monster. He's... a Hulk." She looked towards Bruce for confirmation. "I actually don't know what he is exactly but the Hulk isn't that monster."
Maya shook her head. "No, of course not. I didn't mean it like that."
She tilted her head. "Then how did you mean it?" she challenged.
"Saniya," he said softly.
"I don't like what she's insinuating. That's all." She crossed her arms.
Maya glanced between Saniya and Bruce, trying to figure out which one was the biggest threat. "I'm sorry, doctor. I didn't mean anything by what I said. It's just that I've seen the videos and I remember thinking that you... um... the Hulk acted so animal-like. Honestly, it's fascinating to watch the mixture of human characteristics and feral instincts. It's hard to wrap my head around how that's you!"
Just as she opened her mouth, Bruce grabbed her hand and squeezed gently. "The Other Guy isn't easy to understand," he said, fidgeting in his seat. He stood up, pulling Saniya with him. "Do you want any tea?"
"No thank you," Maya said.
Bruce had no trouble leading Saniya into the kitchen. In a thinly veiled attempted to keep Saniya away from Maya, he had them stand by the kettle until it boiled and taught her the proper technique of tea making. In the end, Maya was awkwardly reading through one of Bruce's books while Saniya watched him drink his tea in the kitchen.
After he had drank the lost drop, she found herself unable to hold it in anymore. "I'm sorry I snapped at her," she whispered to him, afraid that Maya would overhear. It wasn't her she was apologizing to.
"It wasn't something worth getting angry about," he replied.
"Well if you weren't going to get angry about what she said, someone had to," Saniya said. His eyebrows came together and he looked like he wanted to argue with her logic.
The bathroom door opened. Pepper came out with a towel wrapped around her head and wearing the same clothes as before. The whites of her eyes were light red. "I want to go back to the mansion," she said when everyone was looking at her. "I want to see if they found anything."
And that's what they did. They, meaning Maya, Bruce, and Pepper. Saniya took charge by calling for a SHIELD escort but stayed behind. She had had enough of that mansion to last a lifetime. Plus, she didn't need to be reminded of Tony's death. In fact, she was doing her best to block the whole experience from her memories.
Saniya was laying on the couch, throwing her phone –that had miraculously stayed with her– into the air. After five minutes of doing so, she was completely bored. So, she decided to call someone that she should have the second she was safe.
"Saniya, I assume you're safe."
She sighed. "Yeah, Nat, I'm fine."
"Then why are you calling?"
That stung a little. In fact, she physically recoiled at the indifference in her voice. "I just wanted to let you know that I'm alive and not... dead."
"I know." There was a long moment of silence. Just when Saniya considered hanging up, Natasha spoke again. "I'm glad you're okay. But just because you were in an accident does not mean I'm not expecting that report," she teased.
"I lost my laptop and notes, though," she complained.
"No excuses. Welcome to the espionage workforce: bad hours and unreasonable bosses."
"At least the pay's good," she sighed. Saniya positioned herself on her side, resting her head on a lumpy pillow that smelt like Bruce. "Have they found a body yet?"
"No," Natasha said, immediately understanding that she meant Tony. "They've just sent divers into the ocean, but we can't expect them to find anything for a while. There's literally tons of debris to go through. I'll tell you if we find out anything on the helicarrier."
"Okay," Saniya breathed out. Her fingers were digging into the sofa.
Natasha sighed. "Can I give you some advice?"
"Depends on the advice," she mumbled.
"Don't overthink these types of things. In our line of work, people are constantly put in the line of danger. This won't be the first or last time that someone you know dies. You're going to end up killing yourself inside if you grieve for everyone."
Her mouth fell open. "Are you seriously telling me not grieve for Tony? What the hell, Nat?"
"Grieving is for funerals. You can feel sad then. Right now, there's work to do, particularly that report."
Saniya squeezed her eyes shut. "I'm not not going to feel bad about this." Maybe taking advice from the Black Widow on something other than spying was a bad idea. "What if Clint suddenly dies? Are you not going to grieve for him?"
"That's different."
"How?" Saniya demanded.
"He's my partner, my friend. Tony was never anything to you."
A lump in her throat formed as she found some truth in that statement. He was never a true friend, but he wasn't nothing either. He meant something to her, even if it was only as a fond acquaintance.
"Has anyone told you that you're a tiny bit cold hearted?" Saniya said to her.
"I believe I've been told that once or twice. Kind people don't become assassins," Natasha said. Her tone sobered to a more serious one. "Think about my advice. I'm only looking out for you."
"In your own twisted way," she muttered under her breath. Saniya sat upright. "Natasha?" she said suddenly.
"Yes?"
"Was Tony your friend?"
Natasha cleared her throat. "Would you like the honest answer or the short one?"
Saniya resisted the urge to roll her eyes. "I wouldn't ask if I didn't want an honest answer."
"He was my teammate. I preferred to keep him in that box."
Saniya waited for more of an explanation, but it never came. She had a feeling that she had been told the short answer. "Nat?"
There was an unnatural huskiness to her voice. If she was speaking to a normal person, she would have assumed that she was close to tears. "I have to go. Clint is being Clint again. Take care."
"You too," she replied. "Shoot some Nazi's for us."
She ended the call reluctantly. Then, she sent a quick, obligatory text to Greg that she was going to stay in Malibu for longer than expected. He quickly replied back with a frowny face. He then began telling her about the manager who worked for a private security company and the cool skull-tentacle creature tattoo he had. He was so fascinated by it that he was considering getting one himself.
Just when he was finished telling her exactly where on his arms the tattoo would be, her phone died. She ended up falling asleep on the couch out of boredom until Bruce, Pepper, and Maya returned.
She woke to someone gently shaking her. Saniya blinked awake. She was laying on the couch the opposite direction she had fallen asleep in. "Bruce?" She looked out the windows. It was pitch black outside.
Only the outline of Bruce's face could be seen in the dark living room. "Pepper and Maya are staying at a hotel for the next couple of nights."
She was so drowsy that not even hearing that Pepper was staying with a mysterious woman could wake her up. "Oh," she said slowly. Her eyes drooped.
Bruce chuckled softly. "You can sleep on the couch if you want. I told them we'd meet up in the morning for breakfast."
It made sense to stay. There just wasn't enough energy in her to make it out the front door, let alone to a hotel. "Thanks," she mumbled. Saniya curled on her side, quickly falling back to sleep. She barely felt Bruce draping a blanket over her or the gentle "good-night".
Bruce awoke in a panic after he heard a glass break. He jolted up in bed, heart beating faster than safe. There was the familiar strain in his body as the Other Guy attempted to break free. He began to measure his pulse, finding it somewhat calming to focus on the slowing beats.
There was another thump.
Saniya was staying in his home, he reminded himself as his mind jumped to the worst scenario. She was a consistent sleepwalker. This wasn't surprising in the least. In his head, he went back in time to reassure himself that he locked the doors leading out to the beach. The last thing he wanted was for her to drown in her sleep.
He was deciding whether to wake Saniya up or let her be when the door slowly opened. Her head drooped forward and her feet never lifted from the floor as she scooted towards the window.
"Marsha, what are you... what... where..." She began reaching for the window latch. Bruce was quick to jump out of bed. He took her hands off the latch and placed himself between the window and her.
"Saniya," he said softly. His hand hovered over her shoulder, unsure whether to shake her awake or not.
"Marsha, Marsha, Marsha, so sweet, so pure," Saniya muttered, hair draped over her face like the girl from the Grudge.
It was odd having her stand in front of him, her eyes half-lidded and body swaying back and forth. She stumbled past him and bumped her legs against his bed. Then, to his surprise and mild horror, she slipped herself under his sheets and fell into an even deeper sleep.
At this point, Bruce knew that any reasonable person would grab a pillow and blanket then spend the rest of the night on the couch. That was what he should have done. He knew that quite well.
But Bruce hadn't had a woman in his bed for a long time. Years in fact. So, the idea of sleeping next to another living person was very inviting. There was something calming about sleeping in the same bed as another person.
Another part of him knew that if he dared go under those blankets without at least waking her, he'd be the dirty old man he was building himself up to be. He shouldn't be actually considering this. It wasn't right.
Then again, it was just sleeping. He wouldn't dare do anything more than that. He was a good man.
"Damn it," he scolded himself as he found himself climbing into bed with her.
He closed his eyes, taking in everything from the slight dip in the mattress from the second body to the sound of deep breaths that weren't his own. Bruce imprinted this to his memory. There most likely wouldn't be another time like this.
It was obvious to him that what he was doing was creepy. To make himself feel better, he scooted to the edge of the bed so there wasn't any chance of them touching. For good measure, he placed his pillow between them.
Pillow-less and nearly hanging off the edge of the bed, he fell into a peaceful slumber, feeling a little less lonely. And for once, it seemed that the Other Guy was at peace as well. Saniya's calming effect was instantaneous. Unbeknownst to Bruce, he had the same effect on her.