Chapter Five – Can't Say You Didn't Try
Chloe
Chloe woke up the next morning expecting to have a massive headache, she never really got hangovers but her head would hurt for a few hours, yet this morning she felt nothing. She couldn't put her finger on the reason that it wouldn't be happening. Then she realized how bad she needed to use the bathroom. A picture of Beca popped into her head, specifically Beca holding a water bottle out for her to take. She smiled with the memory of the action. Then she saw a picture of Beca sitting with Jesse, happy smile was gone. She pushed the thought aside with the covers off of her bed and got up to prepare for the day. It was the first Bellas practice and she knew Aubrey would be micromanaging everything already.
Chloe waited for Beca outside the rehearsal room, which was basically an old expo center the school didn't use anymore, later that day. She expected Beca to be the last to arrive, well minus Kori because as Aubrey so liked to put it "she was treble-boned" and kicked out of the group. Chloe tried her best to keep Bree from doing so but she couldn't stop her. Bree had her reservations about Mary Elise having done the same as well. Chloe spotted Beca across the last section of the Quad and ran toward her. She was excited, to say the least, to see this particular Bella. Chloe wanted to thank her and make sure she really made a promise to take Chloe out (weather it was a real date or not). "Hey Bec! I just wanted to say thank you for all the water you made me drink last night." Chloe of course hugged her when she said her thank you. She could feel Beca stiffen under her and literally freeze in place but Chloe didn't loosen her grip until it became a weird length of time for them to be standing like that.
"Umm…you're welcome…I guess." Beca moved away from Chloe and headed toward the rehearsal space. "I can see that it kept you from getting hungover after drinking a bottle of Boone's Farm and one of vodka."
"Oh I don't get hangovers. I don't know why I just never have." Chloe was so excited to be near Beca she was skipping alongside of her.
"Of course you don't!" Beca laughed, Chloe basked in it. Filled with a new found confidence from Beca's laugh Chloe grabbed her hand and pulled her the rest of the way. They looked around at some of the old Bellas pictures they had brought from the house and waited for everyone to arrive. Aubrey began practice once they did.
Practice went well in Chloe's mind…minus Mary Elise being kicked out at the beginning for again being treble-boned. There was also the part when she and Bree had to explain what happened at the Nationals last year. Plus Aubrey's constant bickering with Beca who was asking relevant questions. Everything almost ended on a high note when they discussed the SBT mixer next week, then they tried the traditional Bellas…well it wasn't really a handshake…I guess you could call it a chant, and all hell broke loose again. Thankfully Bree just saved that mess for next practice. Chloe was trying to hurry and finish up stacking chairs to try and catch Beca before she was gone when she heard Aubrey asking to speak with Beca.
Chloe made it to "ear monstrosities" before giving up on not eavesdropping. Beca was right in the fact that Bree didn't like her and Chloe wasn't sure if it really was for her attitude or the fact that she was all Chloe could think or talk about recently. When she folded up the last chair she heard the last thing she ever expected from Aubrey. "I know you have a 'toner' for Jesse." Aubrey's tone was nothing but accusatory. Chloe's heart sank. Did Beca like Jesse as more than a friend like she let off last night? She had toned out the explanation of a toner with her own thoughts.
"Yeah that's not really a thing, and if it was Jesse is definitely not who I would have one for. Besides you're not the boss of me." Beca was just digging herself a deeper…wait…if not Jesse then who would she have a toner for?
"You took an oath!"
"That oath cost you two girls already…TODAY! I'm pretty sure you need me more than I need you!"
"I can see your toner through those jeans!"
"That's my DICK!" Chloe couldn't help but laugh and she knew they both heard because when she turned around Beca was smiling at her and Aubrey looked like she could kill anyone. Chloe went to her best friend's side and tried to comfort her.
"Everything will be fine Bree." Aubrey brushed her off and left out the back door of the hall. Chloe turned back to the front entrance to see Beca leaning on the door frame watching her. "Hey Bec everything okay?"
"Yeah just thought I'd wait for you since you know General Posen stormed off." Chloe laughed at the nickname then corrected herself.
"You can't call her that when there is anyone around she will kill me!" Chloe panicked. She and Beca walked out the door and Chloe turned to lock up.
"You guys have the keys to this place?"
"Yeah, the school doesn't use it for anything anymore and since our house is small and we physically can't practice in it they gave us the keys so we can come and go as needed." Chloe thought back to the day when she and Aubrey were given all the Bella keys. Chloe was thrilled and could hardly contain her excitement, while Aubrey stood at attention like she was being addressed by her father and given a medal of valor or something. Beca's voice brought her back to the present.
"Where did you go?" Beca asked quietly.
"Back to when I was given the keys, it was a great day for me." Chloe wanted to know more about Beca and talking about herself was not the way to get to do that. "So, no interest in Jesse? You guys seemed like you were really hitting it off last night." Chloe didn't know why she thought to talk about Jesse, that was the last subject she wanted on her mind.
"No, not really, not that he isn't attractive but he's not what I'm looking for right now. At least not in that way." Beca confessed. Chloe took this as an opportunity to dig deeper but felt like she should still take things slow.
"So last night, did I hear you tell me that we would go somewhere on our own and talk after a few Bellas practices or was I just super drunk?" Chloe asked with a laugh. Beca laughed too.
"No you heard right, but maybe after the Sigma Beta Theta mixer? I feel like a performance will be good to get out of the way." That was in a week. Chloe could wait a week.
"Of course! I can't wait!" She hugged Beca again and it felt the same as it did the first time. "You're not much of a hugger are you?"
"No actually I'm really not." Chloe released her and backed up a little.
"Well you are just going to have to deal with mine because I don't think I can stop myself around you." She ended the line with a wink. "Well I gotta head back to the house before Aubrey realizes that she can't get in because I have the keys." Both girls laughed. "See you later Bec, is it okay that I call you that?" Chloe figured she should ask since the girl obviously had personal reservations.
"Yeah, Bec is fine." Chloe nodded and waved her goodbye before turning to head home. Just as she did her phone went off with a text from Bree saying she couldn't get in and Chloe only laughed.
Clarke
"GOOD MORNING PLEDGES!" Clarke was up and in a defensive stance lightning fast, Octavia and Harper were up just as fast. All of the freshmen stayed the night in the house after the party. They were sleeping side by side on the floor of the living room. Ontari's voice was loud enough as it was and when she added in the megaphone it was deafening. All of the sisters were laughing along behind her. Once the freshmen had gotten their bearings they laughed along to at the prank. "Welcome to the first day of pledging. Get dressed and be in the kitchen in ten minutes." The girls nodded and followed orders.
"Dude, I have a raging hangover right now." Octavia said covering her face.
"That would be because you drank your weight in liquor last night O." Clarke laughed at her. She herself had downed water like crazy after every drink she had (she had a feeling this morning was going to turn out just like this).
Once the girls were all dressed and in the kitchen they were welcomed by a pancake breakfast. Clarke felt a little weird that everything was so different than it was in movies but also a little relieved. Everyone ate together and the side conversations that were happening were enough to keep the feeling happy in the room. Then Ontari broke the conversations to pull the attention to her. "Okay everyone it's time to give out the first pledge task and give each girl their pledge pin." The sisters stood and made their way back to the living room.
Clarke and the others were ushered into a line in front of the fireplace where Nia had stood the night before. Each of them were presented with a small pin with the sorority crest and Greek letters on it. "You are to wear your pin at all times to signify that you are a pledge, once you are sworn in as sisters you will wear it to important events only." Nia explained to them. "Now, as your pledge master, Ontari will explain your first pledge task." Ontari walked over to pace along in front of them.
"Your first task is tradition. Each of you is required to find a first date. That means that you must go out with someone you have never been out with before. You will all schedule your date for the day and time that we give you. Each of your dates will be judged, you are to take pictures of each thing you do, then after they are done and everyone is back here we will decide who had the best date." Ontari explained. "All you are allowed to say when accepting the date is that they need to make it the best first date ever. Once you all have dates we will set up the day and times you each will be picked up. Everyone clear?" Each girl nodded.
Clarke wasn't sure how she felt about this task. Sure it was easy enough but what did it really accomplish? Make some poor sole out to be a joke if they only planned to take one of them to dinner and a movie? Not saying she wouldn't try everything she could to have the best date, but she couldn't say that she wasn't worried about what was going to happen once they compared them all. Her mind floated to Lexa and she let herself think about what would happen if they went out for this challenge. Then she thought about if she should try and get Lexa to ask her out or if it should be a guy, Clarke was worried about how the sisters would react to a lesbian date. Then remembered that they lived in the twenty first century and that was just ridiculous…right?
"Now that we are through that, your first big appearance as pledges will be next week. It's Sigma Theta Beta's annual fall mixer." Nia stated. "And seeing as though they are our brother fraternity we are all required to attend. We will be wearing our SZP polos and you will all wear your pins." Each freshman was handed a robin's egg blue polo with silver Greek letters embroidered on the left chest. After Nia finished her explanation of the mixer and they went over some of their traditions again the girls were all released from the house.
"Hey O," Clarke called after her friend. "Are you headed back to the dorm?"
"Yeah, I gotta change before practice starts."
"You guys have practice? I mean you just had a game last night." Clarke asked.
"Yeah it's a recovery thing and coach wants to go over everything from the game last night." Octavia explained. "You coming to rave to Rea about all the sorority stuff with me?" She asked with a smile on her face.
"Are you kidding? I wouldn't miss that for the world, especially since she won't want to hear any of it and we both will be hitting her from every side." Clarke thought back to their task and wondered what Octavia thought about everything. "Hey, what are you gonna do about the whole date task?"
"I honestly don't know. With lacrosse, dating has been the last thing on my mind. I guess I could always try and get one of the brothers to ask me out at the mixer, though if Bellamy has anything to say about it I won't complete the task." Octavia joked. Clarke had completely forgotten that Bellamy was a Sigma brother.
"What about that guy he brought to your lacrosse game? He was super nice and Bell seemed to get along with him." Clarke hoped that O could get her brother to loosen the reigns since this was something she had to do for the sorority. "Hey does Bell even know you rushed?"
"Umm…no…he doesn't. I guess he will find out at the mixer." Octavia just shrugged and kept walking. Clarke knew that O and Bell tended to butt heads when it came to college stuff and well basically anything that Octavia found fun and Bellamy found his little sister shouldn't be involved it. "Plus I never even met the guy he brought along. He was super cute though from what I could tell. But I bet Bell would kill any one of those guys that tried to date me. I mean think about that Clarke? One of his precious brothers dating his little sister? Yeah he would probably need to die before that happened." Clarke laughed along because it was so true. The conversation died as they entered their building and Clarke glanced toward Baker Hall and thought about Lexa one last time, deciding that if she in fact did ever get her to ask her out she would have her be the one to complete her task.
Lexa
Last night Lexa had gone out with Anya and some of the other upperclassmen from the lacrosse team to celebrate their win. It wasn't really anything special, they went to the "on campus" (it was a block off campus but the only one within walking distance and they tended not to card) bar for drinks and pool. Lexa did drink but only one beer because it was practically forced down her throat.
"You scored half the points of the game you are drinking with us!" Echo yelled across the pool table over the music. After that, and the four rounds of shots all the upperclassmen took, Lexa convinced the bartender to keep filling her empty beer bottle with Coke so it still looked like she was drinking. Lexa didn't mind underage drinking, what she minded was trying to get home from a place she had never been hammered off her ass. Plus she was having fun hustling guys at pool.
"How did you learn to play like that?" Anya, the most sober besides Lexa, slid next to her and asked.
"My dad and uncle taught me and my sister how to play when we were little. We grew up with a table in both of our houses." Shit, she never meant for that last bit to slip out. Thankfully Anya didn't catch it, or if she did she was too drunk or nice to say anything about it. After that she played a few more games, fought off a few guys, then once the whole her being gay thing got around a few girls, and decided it was time to go home. She tried to make sure everyone was going to get home safe before she left and Anya assured her they would.
"I stopped drinking alcohol a while ago." She held up the high ball class in her hand. "This is Gin and Tonic, minus the gin. Go home see you at practice tomorrow afternoon." With that Anya shooed her out the door.
Commander: I'm headed back to the dorm now.
Tiny Demon: I will be too...soon.
Lexa had beat Beca back by a long shot, she was able to get showered (again) and get settled into bed before the door opened and Beca came in. They both made sure the other was sober (because they knew how each other were on alcohol) and agreed to talk more in the morning.
Beca's alarm went off first the next morning (I know shocker right?!). Lexa was up with it too. Beca left to get a shower and change. Lexa got up and stretched her muscles that were sore from the game, she was still sitting on the floor when Beca came back. "So how was it becoming a Bella?" Lexa asked.
"It was okay, kinda weird, there was this oath and literally the end of it was 'I solemnly promise to never have sexual relations with a Treblemaker, or may my vocal cords be ripped out by wolves', yeah that Aubrey chic has problems." The sisters laughed. "The hood night party was fun. I didn't drink much. Wasn't comfortable around them and you know how I get." Beca stated. Lexa knew that Beca tended to not be able to control her actions or words when she was drunk. Much like Lexa herself, except eventually Lexa would black out completely. "I was kinda busy trying to keep Chloe from getting alcohol poisoning to drink anyway. Plus Jesse kept hitting on me, then he figured out he didn't really have a chance with me." Lexa's head shot up and the mention of Chloe.
"Really? You spent time with Chloe? How did it go? Were you actually flirting with her this time?" Lexa rattled off questions as fast as she came up with them.
"Dude calm your tits! Yes I spent time forcing Chloe to drink water so she didn't get hungover and didn't end up in the ER. I may have let slip that you were biologically my cousin and that I wanted to tell her my life story but I would hardly call that flirting." Beca was a shade of red that Lexa had never seen before.
"YOU TOLD HER WHAT?!" Lexa didn't mean you yell that so loud but she did. She wasn't angry with her sister just surprised. This was honestly the first time they really had to tell people about what happened all those years ago because everyone from their town knew what happened. It was national news as well because of who they were. "Sorry, I didn't mean to yell. I'm honestly surprised you found someone that you trust with all of this."
"You did too. Don't try to deny it I know you want to tell Clarke, I saw the way you blushed when she complimented you after your game." The conversation had turned on Lexa and she wasn't sure how to stop it. "Look I really don't have time to talk about all of this now. I have practice across campus in like twenty minutes and as Chloe put it last night 'Aubrey doesn't do late'. We will talk when I get back." Thank God for practices! Lexa thought.
"I may not be here when you get back. I have recovery practice later." Beca nodded and headed toward the door. "Hey Bex." She turned back around. "I'm okay with you telling her everything…and I mean EVERYTHING! I trust you Bex, and if you trust her that is enough for me." Beca flashed her sister a smile.
"Love ya Lex, see you later. We need to have a serious talk later." Beca opened the door but didn't exit. "I'm okay with you telling Clarke too just so you know." Then she was gone. Lexa called after her that she loved her too but the door had closed. It wasn't often that they said that to each other but in times like this they knew it was necessary.
Lexa went for a short jog to help her muscles before practice started. Being bored as she was she decided to head to the field early. She was of course the first one there, besides coach, and once she was changed she grabbed her stick and speakers to head to the field. She was blaring Beca's lacrosse playlist through the speakers while taking shots on goal when the girls started to arrive.
"Wow this music is great, kinda gets me pumped up to play. Who made this? It's really good!"
"HOLY FUCKING SHIT DUDE! Don't sneak up on people like that!" Octavia was standing behind her, she never heard any of the girls come to the field. She may have been lost in the music (aka thinking about Clarke). Octavia laughed.
"Sorry, but seriously who is this?"
"Beca actually, she really good with shit like that." Lexa explained. She noticed the other team members at this time, most of them still looked hungover even though it was nearly two in the afternoon. Some of them were crowded around the speaker bobbing to the music. Anya asked the same question that Octavia had and Lexa answered again. Coach even said that she wanted to play some in the locker room before every game to get the girls going. Lexa told her she would get Beca to make a disc of some tracks and bring it to next practice.
Recovery practice was much more stretching and running drills rather than learning anything new. Coach went over some of the mistakes that were made in last night's game but there weren't very many. She complimented Lexa on her goals and assists, and expressed her gratitude to the whole team for playing their best. Lexa eventually turned out what her coach was actually saying and started to think about Clarke again.
Lexa couldn't help it. There was something about the girl that made her want to tell her everything. This must be what Beca feels when she thinks about Chloe. She told herself. Lexa wanted more with Clarke though, she wanted a relationship. She wanted to date Clarke. The girl's beauty was unmatched, her heart was kind and open, she was smart and caring, and she was the first person who didn't know Lexa's story that she wanted to tell. I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna ask Clarke to go on a date with me and see what happens. Lexa had been flirting with her and the way that she made her blush at the mention of her less visible tattoos brought a smile to Lexa's face. She felt a nudge in her ribs and looked at Octavia whose brows were knitted in question. Wait, how would O feel about us dating? Clarke was important to Octavia and Lexa didn't want O to feel like she was using their friendship to get closer to Clarke.
Coach dismissed practice and sent the girls back to the locker room. "What got you all smiley out there Lexa?" Of course Octavia wouldn't drop it. "Was it that girl you were telling me about?" They had finished changing and were headed back toward their dorms, it was after six now. Lexa knew this might be the only chance she had to ask Octavia how she felt about her idea.
"Yeah actually I need to tell you something about that." Octavia stopped walking and turned to give Lexa her full attention. "Okay here it goes. The girl I told you about is actually Clarke, and I took your advice and found a way to talk to her and she is super awesome, I can see why you are friends with her. I really do like her, and she is really kinda hot, I didn't know how to tell you sooner because you know she's your best friend and I didn't want you to think that she was the reason I'm your friend because it's not. I mean I did hope to learn a few of her secrets but that's not the reason I wanted to be your friend…"
"LEXA STOP!" Octavia laughed out shaking Lexa by the shoulders a little. "Wow you really do ramble when you are nervous. Look it's okay, I know you like Clarke."
"You do?"
"Yeah I could kinda tell last night." Okay it's now or never Woods. Lexa psyched herself up.
"So, I know this may be weird but, would it be okay with you if I asked Clarke out on a date? I mean would I be wasting my time? Is she even into girls?" Lexa stopped herself before she could ramble again.
"You won't be wasting your time. Clarke is bi, and you don't have to ask my permission to ask her out. It's nice that you did though." Lexa just kept looking at Octavia she wasn't going anywhere until she got a real answer. Octavia sighed. "Yes, I'm okay with you asking Clarke out. It won't bother me in the least if you guys start dating. I know you are a good and caring person Lexa, and I can tell you care about Clarke." Lexa felt relieved.
"Thanks Octavia. It means a lot to me that you are okay with it."
"Of course, so when are you gonna ask her out?" They started walking again.
"I don't know. Maybe after class on Monday?"
"What about right now?" Octavia threw open the door to Marshal Hall and pushed Lexa up the stairs. She stopped her in front of a door marked 248. Octavia reached up and knocked then took off down the hall leaving Lexa alone. She had no time to prepare and when Clarke opened the door she found that she couldn't breathe.
"Lexa? Hey what are you doing here? How did you know which room was mine?" Clarke came out in the hall, Lexa figured it had something to do with the Korean girl in the room who looked oddly pissed off. "Sorry Kimmy Jin can be kinda harsh at times it's better if we talk here." Clarke explained. Lexa remembered the name that was written in the notebook the day before.
"Octavia told me your room number." Only partially a lie. "Actually I wanted to ask you something."
"Yeah, anything. What's up?" Dammit just do it already!
"Will you go out on a date with me?" Stop there before you make a fool of yourself! She looked Clarke dead in those endless pools of blue when she asked. A smile crept across Clarke's face. Then she went back into her room, leaving the door open this time, and wrote something down on a piece of paper. She bounced, yes actually bounced, her way back to Lexa and handed her the paper.
"Make it the best first date ever!" Then she went back in the room and closed the door. Lexa was about to knock and make more plans when she remembered the paper. She looked down to read it.
I'll let you know the date, time,
and where to pick me up. Text me!
Clarke
Her number was written under her name. Lexa smiled at the note and started to do a happy dance when she remembered where she was. She ran full speed back to her own dorm room before she squealed in excitement. Scaring Beca in the process. "Holy fucking shit! Dude you will never guess what I just did!"
Beca
"Well…are you just gonna stand there or are you actually going to say something?" Beca let Lexa stand in the doorway for a few moments before speaking. Though it seemed nothing would get that stupid look off of her face. Beca pushed herself up from her mixing equipment and made her way over to Lexa. It wasn't until they were directly in front of each other that Lexa moved completely into the room and shut the door. Beca continued to watch her sister as she moved into and around the room (still with that stupid grin on her face) and flop onto her bed with a sigh. "Okay I can't take it anymore! What the hell has gotten into you?"
"I asked Clarke out on a date!" Lexa didn't take her eyes off the ceiling above her.
"HOLY SHIT!" Was all Beca could think of. She was insanely happy for and proud of her sister. "When's the big day?" That finally got Lexa to change the look on her face. Her happiness didn't fade at all but something flickered behind her eyes.
"Actually I don't know." Lexa sat up and handed Beca the note from Clarke. "All she said after I asked was to make it the best first date ever, then she handed me that and shut the door." Beca was confused.
"Why? If she said yes…which she did…then why not figure out everything right then?"
"Who knows? I honestly don't care, I mean I'm going on a date with Clarke fucking Griffin!" Lexa flopped back on her bed with a happy sigh that brought a smile to Beca's face again. "Okay enough about that because there isn't really any more detail. Practice was uneventful, actually scratch that, the team heard your lacrosse play list you made me. I had it playing on my speakers before everyone showed up, and they all loved it! Coach wants to know if she can get a CD with a few tracks on it to play in the locker room before games." Lexa continued. Beca was floored she loved getting feedback on her tracks even though she also didn't give a shit what people thought.
"Yeah I'll throw one together before your next practice. Which would be when?" Beca could hardly keep her own schedule straight after all this added Bellas shit.
"Wednesday." Beca nodded and made to move back to her desk before Lexa's words stopped her again. "You said we needed to have a serious talk today before you left for rehearsal. What exactly did you want to talk about?" Beca had totally forgotten about that. She nodded at her sister and sat at the foot of Lexa's bed facing her with her legs crossed underneath her. Lexa instantly mirrored her.
"We haven't sat like this since we turned seventeen." They both smiled at the memories of sitting on their beds gossiping about school and people in their class, they even smiled about the times when Beca's mom was sick or the day landed on an anniversary of something. Beca decided to stop prolonging the inevitable and started talking. "So Bellas rehearsal sucked, we basically learned their Nationals routine from last year. Plus Aubrey gave me a death glare the whole time, and then told me I had a 'musical boner' for Jesse. Lex, last night when Jesse figured out he didn't have a shot with me it was because he caught me staring at Chloe while she was dancing…in a not so innocent way." Beca still couldn't get the image of Chloe shaking her ass at her out of her head.
"Wait you were staring?"
"You would have been too trust me." Beca continued. "Any way, he had sat down with me after Chloe ran to do some line dance. I didn't even know he was there until he bumped my shoulder. Then he said 'who ya drooling over' and I was caught. He has now dubbed himself my 'best lesbro'." Lexa was rolling with laughter.
"That is literally the best thing I have ever heard! I want one! It's totally not fair that you have a best lesbro and you aren't even technically a lesbian!" Lexa continued to laugh and Beca had to admit that it was really funny.
"Yeah so I waited on Chloe after practice, and Aubrey's criticism, was over. We made tentative plans to get together by ourselves and talk. It's not a date or anything…at least we didn't say it was. I don't know."
"Well do you want it to be?"
"What?"
"Do you want it to be a date?" Beca had never really thought about that. Okay that was totally a lie she had thought about it.
"Yeah I kinda do." Lexa just smiled. "Look I know if I want it to be a date then I will have to tell her, I do get that okay?" Beca wasn't sure where she got the courage to say that. She hadn't thought about actually being in a relationship since her mom died. "We aren't going for like another week or so that means I have time to make it a date." If I get the courage to actually ask that. Beca thought back again to their conversation this morning. "I trust her Lex. I know that much."
"Then I trust her too." Lexa knew Beca needed to hear that. "Hey we never actually celebrated the win and you getting accepted together yet! Want to order pizza and I want to hear all about this 'Hood Night'."
"Now that sounds like a plan!" Beca was glad some of the tension was out of the way with Lexa. She had a gut feeling that they would be having more of these conversations in the near future but she couldn't bring herself to care about that right now. Right now she just wanted to go back to being that thirteen year old girl, who sat in her room on Friday nights with her favorite cousin, watching stupid videos on the internet and eating food that should have caused them some health issues by now. That was how Beca felt that night, and she savored it.