Rule #56: Making M'gann turn into a lion just to freak people out at the zoo is NOT team bonding. Neither is showing Conner the monkies. Or Kaldur the fish.
"Conner, no, stop!" Wally yelled as Conner grabbed the steel pipes that were once known as part of the cage for the monkeys.
But it was too late. Conner had already ripped them off and was making his way inside, just to catch the monkeys that had thrown bananas at him. As Wally stared on in pure horror of what Conner was doing to the monkeys, Robin appeared next to him, along with Zatanna and Raquel, who were all staring wide eyed at Conner.
"I tried to stop him..." Wally explained, but Robin shook his head.
"Those monkeys were asking for it when they started taunting him. My question is have you seen either M'gann or Kal?" Robin asked him.
Wally turned to him to tell him last he saw Kal he was looking on at the fishy people with nostalgia, but screams of terror stopped him. The four teens stared at each other, and after a minute of staring at each other unknowingly, they ran to the source of the screaming. When they arrived there, they saw a lion roaring at any person that passed by it's side.
Wally face palmed as he noticed the familiar eyes. He sighed, then turned to Raquel. "Let's go find your boyfriend, Rach. We have nothing to worry about, it's just M'gann." He told them. "Rob, try to stop her."
Robin nodded, then he and Zatanna turned to the lion. Wally and Raquel ran towards they last saw Kaldur, only to see him with his jacket pockets full of fish, and struggling against two security guards.
"These people do not deserve to be locked away as if they were mere criminals!" Kaldur yelled as the men tried to slap handcuffs on him. "You monsters deserve to be locked in cages like this!" He continued.
Wally and Raquel looked on in both amazement and fear at the scene; fear because Kaldur was not known to crack like this. Raquel then quietly whispered, "Is it always like this?"
Wally looked at her with wide eyes, then shrugged. "In missions we tone it down, but when we're free like this, we're as good as a ticking timebomb. Just like Conner and M'gann have showed you." He whispered back.
She nodded at the information, then suddenly Kaldur yelled at them. "Wally! Raquel! Help me! Explain to these monsters I do not deserve to go to jail!"
Both men stared at Wally and Raquel, so he did some quick thinking and shook his head as he wrapped an arm around Raquel's waist. "We're sorry, gentlemen, but we've never seen this man before in our lives. Also, my name's Bolt and this is Jacky, we don't know a Wally or a Raquel." He explained.
Raquel stared up at him, then shrugged internally and kissed Wally's cheek. "We're here on a date, officers." She explained, smiling charmingly.
The men both nodded and tallest said, "We're sorry to have disturbed you. We'll be taking this delinquent away now."
And Kaldur's curses and screams were heard all the way in Gotham.
Rule #57: Do not time travel to freak out your past or future selves.
"Okay, so we basically have to go back in time, because Jason wants to freak Bruce out?" Wally asked as Deadpool, Jason, and Talisman looked at him expectantly.
It had been a while since Wally had seen Talisman, what with him going crazy and deciding to become an anti-hero and all. But, Jason and Deadpool had continued causing mischief with him, which meant more trouble for the League.
"Exac-ca-tally, Waly-poo!" Talisman told him, jumping quickly on his back.
Wally glared at the hyper fifteen year old, then looked up at Jason. "Why do you want to screw Bruce up?" Wally asked.
Jason just shrugged, and said, "It would be funny to catch the Bat surprised. Would be good blackmail material."
Wally thought about it, shrugged, and said, "You had me at catch the Bat surprised."
It had already been almost a year since Bruce Wayne had become Batman, and now he was in his home, with a seemingly mad street kid, who was glaring up at him with everything. Jason didn't really enjoy the fact that he was now with one of the world's richest... Ehem, people, who was also Batman.
Bruce stared down at Jason, who glared up at him, but before they could see what was happening, a bright flash appeared, and four bodies fell from thin air. One was red haired and looked to be fifteen, another was wearing a funny black and red suit, the other was black haired with a white streak and he seemed to be tough, and the last also seemed to be fifteen, but he had spiky white hair.
Jason stared down at them, and the red hair quickly jumped up, and looked around. He groaned when he saw Bruce and Jason, and kicked the one with black hair.
"Why must you be so right?" He growled.
The man punched him in the knee, and got up, only to glare at Bruce and Jason. After some seconds, he finally spoke, "Bruce Wayne, Jason Todd, meet your future." And before any of them could react, Jason drew his gun.
Bruce pulled Jason from behind him, and got in a fighting stance, ready to hurt the intruder. Jason glared at them some more, then said, "Any of you got money?"
Bruce blinked in surprise, but Jason spoke before anything else could happen. "You come into this man's house, threaten him with a gun, and now you want him to give you money?"
Jason; the old one; shrugged and nodded. Jason; the young one; glared at him, then said, "I like your style."
Old Jason smirked, and said, "You should. It's your own." Then, after more inspecting, he asked, "Was I really that short?"
But before anything else could happen, another flash came in, a black gloved hand grabbed him, and sucked him inside. And one by one, the intruders were all sucked up. Jason and Bruce blinked in surprise, then Bruce told him, "This never happend?"
"Nope. Not at all, Bruce. You got any food?"
Rule #58: Don't ask de-aged Robin about his family.
"So, Robin," Artemis started, making the seven year old look up at her.
It had been a long day, with a mission gone wrong that ended with Robin being turned back into a seven year old, and the Bat leaving him with the team. Said something about going to search for a way to revert him back to his age. Wally left to help his uncle in Central, Kaldur went back to get yelled at by half of the League, and Rocket went back with Icon. Zatanna, Artemis, Conner, and M'gann stayed with him, which wasn't necessarily the best thing ever.
"Where are your parents?" Artemis asked, just as Jason walked into the room, without his gear, all the while mumbling about stupid Talisman who stole his helmet.
Robin's mood seemed to make a complete 180 as he pouted and tears started to form in his eyes. Jason's eyes widened as he heard the question, and he quickly ran to the boy.
"How dare you?!" Jason yelled at a surprised Artemis, just as Robin started to sob.
Artemis stared at him wide eyed, making him glare at her. "You NEVER ask about family! Especially with Robin!" Jason yelled, starting to bounce the other boy to calm him down.
After shooting Artemis another glare, Jason walked away with a crying Robin, who was saying something along the lines of "Jay-Jay, make bad idiot go away!". Jason turned around before fading away, glared at the girl, and said, "If I EVER catch you talking about family with Robin, you will regret it." And he was gone.
The team members that were still in the mountain blinked in surprise, and then and there they decided that it would be best to not go against Jason.
Rule #59: Don't bring Kaldur a goldfish, show it to him, and ask if he knows it.
Wally smiled evilly as he carried a plastic bag filled with water and a fish into the mountain. It had been one of those days, were he was able to do everything evil that he wanted to and not get caught, so he had decided to try his luck. He had walked by the pet store on his way to the mountain, so he had just decided to buy a fish and show it to Fish Sticks; A.K.A Kaldur.
"Hey, Fish Sticks!" Wally yelled, making said boy flinch and look up from his book.
Wally smiled cheekily at him, sped over to the boy, and thrust the bag into Kaldur's face. "Hey, Kaldy-boy, I just found him..." He trailed off, "Uh... Her..." Again not sure what the gender was, "IT! Are you by any chance related?"
Kaldur's face heated up at the question, and before Wally could react, Kaldur had thrown the book at his face. And this book wasn't a skinny one, it was the Illiad. The version that had about eight hundred pages.
"Of course we are not! Just because I have gills, it does not mean I am related to every sea creature!" Kaldur yelled, then stormed off.
Wally blinked after the boy, as a red mark started to form on his forehead, then shrugged and decided to find Raquel. She'd understand the joke.
Rule #60: Batman is not your friend. Do not try to hug, high five, or any thing that actually has to do with niceness with him... Well, unless you want to die.
"Good job." Batman told the team as they stared down at their feet.
All of them looked up from the floor surprised, which made the Bat smile. A little. Because seriously, the Batman does not smile. It had been an unauthorized mission, where the team went along with Talisman to capture the his nemesis, Pyro. It seems the madman had been ready for them, and after a huge fight, Talisman and Jason; he just can't get any luck, can he?; were captured and the team had gone after them. After they were able to save the two crazies, the League had arrived as backup, only to find all of the bad guys beat up, along with a beat up team.
Wally smiled happily at the Bat, and before he could think about how much he'd regret it, he sped over to the Bat and hugged him. "Thank you." And he was gone again in the blink of an eye.
Batman glared at Wally, who only smiled nervously, and walked away. The team thought he was mad at Wally, so Artemis smacked him on the back of the head, but what they didn't see was the smile that Batman allowed himself, happy that Wally was finally understanding him. Maybe now he'd give less trouble to the League.
Oh, Bats. How wrong you are. Thank you all for the reviews and suggestions. But I don't think I'll do a Guidelines for Young Justice Invasion. It's not only that I don't know the characters as well as these, it's also that the same rules will apply to them. But don't worry, I have something good for a sequal for this story.
Five reviews and I'll update tomorrow.