Rhiannon went out after a long moment, with a weak smile. She sighed when her brother couldn't hear any more and turned to Tosh.
"He wants to see you."
Tosh nodded and walked to the door. She stopped when she arrived near Rhiannon and put a comforting hand on her forearm.
"It'll be okay."
"I'm just... Yeah, I know. But I wish it could just... stop, someday," she admitted sadly.
Tosh smiled and pulled the woman into a hug. She let her leave to go see Ianto, also hugging him when she saw he was trying to sit. She helped him while still hugging him and he chuckled against her cheek.
"Are you okay?" she asked when he was correctly settled.
"Yeah... Thanks to you, I am."
"You could have asked your sister for this, you know," Tosh casually said, hoping Ianto would go with it.
"I wasn't talking about this. Though, thank you, I hate spending the whole day like this."
"You hate just lying in bed, doing nothing? You must be the only one!"
"Yeah, it reminds me... Well," Ianto sighed. "I just don't like... doing nothing."
Tosh bit her own lip, mentally swearing because she should have been careful with what she was saying. She sat next to Ianto in an appreciated silence. He eventually looked up at her, then looked down again, and put a shaking hand on her knee.
"I meant it. Thank you, for saving me. You didn't have to."
"Of course I had!"
"I'm just bringing problems down all of you..."
"It's not true. Ianto, our lives are dangerous, believe me, we were more screwed up without you. I mean, before you came. And I'm glad you're here. Sometimes Owen or Gwen are too much, it's good to have someone like you. And I'll tell you what, Jack deserves some happiness as well. He's really cute when you're around. I mean, he knows how to lead even if you're here, and how to stay serious, but he's happy. And that, Ianto, is a change from the Jack I met."
"Yeah but..."
"But nothing," Tosh cut him off. "Ianto, you're one of us. You have been since the day we got you out of... this place."
"I feel like I've never left it, sometimes."
Tosh opened her mouth, on the edge of saying something, but she understood the words Ianto had just whispered. She looked at him as he stared at the wall so he had his back on her. He also took his hand away from her knee and clutched his fists on the mattress beneath him.
"What did you... Ianto sweetheart... You're not alone in this, you do realise that?" she asked, her hand ghosting over Ianto's arm without quite touching him. Ianto nodded weakly. "I hadn't realised you... God, Ianto I'm sorry. Do you want to talk about it?"
Ianto scoffed then repressed a sob with a snort. "I bloody hell don't."
Tosh sighed and finally put her hand on his arm. She tightened her hold until Ianto would accept to look at her. He was silently crying and Tosh bit on her own lip again.
"You should talk to Jack."
"Wh..." Ianto began, but didn't finish.
"He knows more about... about this than you think. You... I... Ask him about Gray."
"Who's Gray?" Ianto asked, frowning.
"Just... Just ask him."
Ianto scoffed but didn't answer. He sighed after a while and looked at the wall again, lost in his thoughts. Tosh kissed his cheek with a smile and put her head on his shoulder. He said nothing but put his arm around her, smiling for himself. They usually didn't even have to speak to understand each other. Silence was enough for both of them, and they appreciated it once more, relieved with just the other's presence.
Tosh, who hadn't slept well lately – as if something had disturbed her sleep, how strange – felt she was starting to fall asleep but it was already too late for her to gather enough strength to warn Ianto.
This chapter wasn't supposed to exist at all, and Tosh barely had a part in this fic originally but my beta loves Tosh, and I noticed how Tosh was genuinely the cutest being in Torchwood, so I needed to write her. Have I mentioned how much my beta loves her? Also the Gray part was totally unexpected for me, oops I got carried away.
As always, thank you for reading and don't forget we live for comments, to know if we're writing something okay or just bad stuff ;)