Ianto was supposed to rest. He knew he was. They had come back home for this very purpose, with Jack. But he had already slept way too much in the past few days. Even if seeing his nephews – Rhiannon and Johnny had come with the kids – had probably taken all his strength away. But he loved them even though he had strictly not a single idea of how in the name of God he was supposed to take care of children. Johnny had been kind enough to end his confusion after a while and taken charge of his own children so they could all fully participate to the conversation – without Ianto not listening because David was whispering inappropriate things for a boy of his age in his ear.
They had been able to talk about more serious issues, especially Ianto and Jack's relationship. Ianto had been scared of Johnny's reaction, but other than not really seeing how a man could love another man, he had still understood the feeling. And apart from his occasional jokes he wasn't being homophobic at all, but jokes were part of his character, so Ianto didn't really mind.
And now that they were alone, now that they could actually rest, Ianto couldn't stop thinking about what Tosh had said. Her words had been of a great help, except for that Gray part. He had already heard the name, during his countless nights of just lying in bed, staring at Jack sleeping. Jack sometimes talked in his sleep. Jack sometimes mentioned Gray, but Ianto had always thought it was the colour, or some incomprehensible word rather that Gray.
He sighed, winced as he put a hand on his stomach because sighing sometimes hurt with his wound – a shame, really – and stared at Jack who was doing the dishes, having categorically refused Ianto's help. So he was just standing there, watching him. Ianto ran his hand on his face and clenched his fist in his hair, taking a deep breath.
"Who's Gray?"
Ianto jumped when the mug Jack was holding shattered as it hit the floor.
"Fuck!"
He took a step back as Jack cursed a bit more and collected the broken pieces to put them in the trash. Ianto was shaking, rarely having seen Jack lose control and shout across the room, even only to himself.
"Next time come talk to me instead of Tosh," Jack snapped after a while.
"I didn't... She just... she told me to..." Ianto stuttered, not really able to justify himself, because was Jack purposely turning his back on him?
"I didn't mean to... I'm sorry," Jack said after a while, his back still on Ianto. He sighed and turned, his arms crossed on his chest, leaning against the kitchen counter. "I should have told you sooner. But it's... It's just irrelevant. It's not me. Well it's... Can we go somewhere else than the kitchen? I need to sit. And a drink. Want one?"
"I'm fine," Ianto said as he walked out of the kitchen, letting Jack alone as long as he wanted. He went to the living room and sat on the sofa. He had to sit straight because his back still hurt and his stomach was a pain as well.
Jack joined him after a couple of minutes, a glass of whiskey in his hand even though he hated that – why they even had whiskey in here in the first place was a total mystery – and sat next to him. Not quite against him, like he would usually do – personal space didn't exist when your boyfriend was Jack Harkness – which made Ianto realised he liked it when Jack sat almost on him, now that he didn't. But he didn't say a thing and let Jack sip his drink, wincing at the alcohol.
"Gray's my brother," he whispered in his glass, between two sips. Ianto didn't answer because he wasn't sure he had heard right. He sure did not recall Jack mentioning a brother, ever. Or a dad. Or even a mother for that matter. "Remember when I said I knew Tosh since my teens? She's the only one to know because I was still depressed when I met her. It's nothing, nothing important. I told you it's just..." he drew in a deep breath and finished the glass in one go. "Really. My father died when I was young, I had a little brother, who disappeared and, yes, it was my fault. We buried an empty coffin," Jack scoffed. "God that was stupid."
"What about..." Ianto didn't finish his sentence, not wanting to force Jack into talking.
"My mother let herself die. I've never hated my power more than back then," he admitted, his eyes down on the ground, his head slightly turned to the side so Ianto wouldn't see him, wouldn't see his eyes and guess everything.
Ianto opened his mouth, then realised what Jack had meant. He didn't need to see Jack to understand. He had hated his power because while his mother had been able to let herself die – he so didn't want to know how – Jack hadn't. More like Jack couldn't. He had tried. He had tried and had hated himself because for some bloody reason he had kept reviving.
"I... I'm sorry," Ianto whispered, putting a careful hand on his shoulder.
"I'm fine," Jack said, repressing a sob. "I'm fine now..." He searched for Ianto's hand and put his on it, tightening his hold. Ianto let him do. Jack eventually turned to look at him again and even though he had tears in his eyes, he was smiling. "I really am," he said more firmly.
Ianto nodded and Jack brought his hand to his mouth to kiss it. Ianto rolled his eyes with a smile that didn't quite reach his ears and pulled Jack into a hug.
"I had no idea. But... If you want to talk. Anytime. I... I'm here," Ianto said after a while, rubbing Jack's back.
"I know. I know... And I'm here too. I'm... I really could listen to any of your stories."
Ianto froze for a moment. Bloody Tosh. Of course she had guessed everything. Had she suggested him to ask about Gray so he would have to say something in exchange to Jack? No, she wasn't like this at all. She had just been helping them. She was just trying to make a couple that wasn't at all for talking actually communicate. Ianto smiled again and kissed Jack who was looking at him, probably wondering what he was thinking about.
He would also have to think about what Jack had just said. That was hard. He hadn't thought Jack had had a life as tough as this. Losing his whole family...