Author's note: Hello to anyone still out there! I guess I've been inspired by the new book to try and finish this and at least give it an ending; it'll hopefully be wrapped in one/two posts! Hope everyone is having a nice summer and enjoyed the book as much as I did. :)
VICTOIRE POV
I drummed my hands on my desk, neatly filed nails tapping rhythmically against the old worn wood. Binns was droning on in the background; waffling in his horrible monotonous voice about Goblin wars or Salem- I'd stopped listening the second I sat down. It was an unusually warm day, and most of the students were daydreaming and sluggishly taking random notes; except me and him.
Cass sat two rows ahead of me to my left. From my perch by the window I could see his quill laying untouched on parchment in front of him. His hand hung loose by his side, his chin resting lazily on his other. I stared at him absently, reflecting on the lack of emotion I felt when I looked at him. How could I feel nothing? Had it not actually been love then, that I'd felt? I'd felt affection, for sure, but how could I look at someone I'd once loved and feel… nothing. Did that happen once you'd moved on? Does that passion just fade to indifference and that need just fade to apathy?
My drumming intensified, gaining looks of annoyance from nearby students. I shot my gaze to the nearest one, a mousey haired brunette whose name I'd forgotten and was stupid enough to glare in my direction a beat longer than the others. She caught my eyes with a start, swallowing as I quirked a cool brow at her and scowled slightly.
I frowned over at her for long after she'd refocused on her notes; speedily jotting down every syllable Binns uttered in an effort to avoid my gaze. How much things had changed this year. Cass was practically a stranger, and strangers now felt it pertinent to give me sass in classrooms. Admittedly, she'd looked away in the end, but that she'd looked at all…
Was that Teddy's influence? Did people think I'd gone soft because of him? Or that I was never formidable in my own right, but only because I'd had Cass's ear? Or was it the disastrous spectacle I'd made of my love-life this year, that suddenly had people seeing me as someone less terrifying and more pathetic? Could be any of them, I mused, lifting my gaze from the girl. Her shoulders slackened visibly.
Unconsciously, my eyes sailed back to my original object of interest. Cass was yawning now, stretching long toned arms behind his head and squinting in the sunlight. I tilted my head and studied him closely. No, it wasn't apathy that I felt. Not quite. I didn't feel stirrings of love, or the even a mild sting of anger when I looked at him; and so I'd mistaken it for apathy. I still cared about him. The knowledge of that made me wince. Merlin, maybe I truly was pathetic.
Forcing myself to look elsewhere, I thought of Teddy and how I'd last seen him. It was in the library last night, slouched into a seat far too small for him and absently flicking through a book whilst pretending he wasn't staring at two third years a couple of tables away from us. Trying to focus on my study was made impossible by frequent snickers and low "ooooohs" and "ahhhhhhs" from his side of the table. Eventually he'd had to leave because the third year breakup two tables away proved too exciting for him to stay quiet.
Without realising it, my lips had curved into a smirk. I blinked quickly, picking up my quill and examining it thoughtfully. Teddy could make me smile with just the thought of him. That went so immeasurably far beyond what I felt for Cass. Yes, I know longer wanted to cry or scream when I thought about Cass, but that didn't mean I loved him anymore. I thought deeply on this. I definitely didn't love him. Still, to come through all that crap with him and not want to murder him was something. I guess it meant that I had truly loved him?.
And yet… I looked over at him again, as he sighed heavily and shifted in his seat.
And yet I didn't feel easy about forcing him to sit out this match. I had no idea how I would even go about such a feat, so it was kind of a non-issue anyways. But as I sat and thought properly on it, it hit me fully that we would never resolve this and be mates. Throughout all the drama I was fine with that. He could burn in hell for all I cared. But now we'd reached this impasse. A cease fire of sorts. And I was happy. And he probably was too. We no longer had the means to damage or hurt each other and yet here I was, actively seeking to manipulate his loss for Teddy's gain.
Stoking the flames of a fire that had all but extinguished.
He brought it on himself. He should have admitted he threw the first punch.
I repeated those words to myself a few times, but they did little to lessen the knot in my stomach. A little voice was refusing to shut up in the back of my head. Would you have ever admitted your guilt? Before Teddy, if you'd gotten away with what Cass did at the expense of Bursnell, would you have renounced your actions? I didn't answer and the knot tightened.
I glared at the mousey haired girl again. Before I had a conscience life was a hell of a lot fucking easier.
XXXXXXXXXX
"Well anyways, he's meeting me at seven, and depending how it goes…" Lys shrugged, allowing a coy smile to fill her features before reaching for her yoghurt. "I may see you this evening, I may see you tomorrow."
"Uh-huh." I nodded absently, licking my own spoon in thought.
Lys rolled her eyes, leaning across the table and hissing at me over the fruit bowl. "Victoire, are you even listening to me?"
I sighed delicately, letting my spoon flop onto my plate with a thunk. "Ainsley is meeting you at seven and you're feeling frisky, and I'd better be paying attention else ways how can I subtly mention this to Teddy in conversation so that it definitely gets back to Greenwood, without you having to say it to him?"
She pursed her lips, considering me for a moment before reaching for an orange and turing it over in her hands. I waited.
"Well… alright then." She smirked.
I picked up my spoon again and stirred my yoghurt half-heartedly. "Remind me why you're doing this again? You could just… I dunno, talk to Greenwood?"
Her eyes widened and she quickly glanced around to the rest of the Slytherin Table to check we'd been heard. Satisfied that all of the students were too preoccupied with themselves to be paying attention, she looked at me quizzically.
"Talk to him? You feeling alright there Weasel?" She scoffed, popping an orange slice in her mouth.
I grinned softly. "Fair point. It was a dopey suggestion. Your plan sounds good. Flawless, actually. Ainsley was a good choice."
She tilted her head in acknowledgement, smiling smugly. "I know right? Teach that muppet to take someone else to Hogsmeade."
I nodded in agreement rolling my eyes. "Ted told me yesterday he'd asked her ages ago and forgot until the day before."
Lys scowled, huffing loudly and waving the last orange slice to embellish her words. "Do I fucking care when he asked her? Do I fucking care he has the brain of a skrewt? If he's serious about us, then the very least he can do is not take other girls on dates. If he only remembered on such short notice then that's what he should have told her when he was apologising for not being able to bring her! Why am I the one suffering for his stupidity?"
I finished my yoghurt, nodding in agreement. "Totally fucking right. Just keeping you in the loop."
"Pfft. Passing on Teddy's message from Aelius more like."
I laughed out loud and stared at her pointedly. "Oh I'm sorry. You wanted me to stop passing messages? I was unclear from all that chat about Ainsley earlier, but I'll keep mum, no worries."
She threw a napkin at me, grinning cheekily. "You'll do no such fucking thing!"
I held my hands up in defeat, my smile still in place when she suddenly changed the subject.
"So how's operation Quidditch going anyways? Any headway with You-Know-Who?"
My smile faded. "Ugh- nothing. I've got nothing to show for all that time with Burnell and the match is like literally in two days."
She winced sympathetically. "Nothing? That's shit, I'm sorry."
I nodded, thinking absently. "Hey, do you think I've gone soft?"
She paused to consider this. "Hmmn. Softer definitely. I dunno if you're aware of this but you did just suggest talking to Aelius?"
Shit. I had done that. Was that why I couldn't get this done with Cass? Because I was too soft to let go of what we'd once had and rip his jugular open? I frowned. No, surely not. There was no leverage, no angle for me to exploit? I couldn't be mad for not duelling to kill when I didn't even have a wand?
"And you did forgive Bursnell. Which I have to admit I never thought would happen." She continued.
"I didn't forgive her?" I replied, confused.
Lys rolled her eyes sarcastically. "Sure, she just plonks on your bed every night to brainstorm with you because you both despise each other."
Frowning more deeply, I shook my head. "We have a… grudging respect and a mutual enemy. That does not make us friends."
Lys gave a small smile. "Whatever you say."
I paused, trying to phrase my next question. "Do you think… Do you think it'll start things up again if I go after Cass for Sunday?"
She didn't pause. "Depends how you go after him."
We stared at each other for a moment, both of us thinking of all the drama and pain and anger the past year had brought; a lot of it directly fuelled by Cass.
"When we were together, would you have counted Cass as a friend?"
I had never considered what the demise of my relationship had cost Lys in terms of anything but reputation. But I found myself curious now, needing to speak to someone who understood. Someone who saw him as I had. I knew he'd betrayed me, and betrayed me long before we'd started having problems and yet…
I didn't hate him anymore.
Lys frowned at my line of questioning but considered her answer carefully. "No. He was always kind to me and made sure I was included… But I always knew it was for your benefit not mine. I got the impression he saw pleasing me as a means of pleasing you. So don't get me wrong I always liked the guy but we weren't friends."
I nodded. "Do you think he's a bad person?"
"I think he's a stupid person. And an arrogant person. I think he thinks of himself first and others second. When he's great at something, no one has ever been as good as him. And when things are bad, no one has ever had it as bad as him. I think he needs to grow up and realise that is not the case. Why are we talking about this again?"
I swallowed, looking at the table instead of at her.
She sighed. "Oh boy. You've thought of something, haven't you?"
I looked up at her, puzzled. "No, no- I just am having conflicted feelings about stirring the pot with Cass again."
She shook her head sagely, dark curls bouncing against her neck. "We're talking about one quidditch match, not the end of the world. If you're this tormented then there's a reason. I think you know exactly how to make him sit out, but you're scared to do it for some reason. So come on. Out with it."
I blinked quickly, suddenly feeling defensive.
"I- ok, well- I don't know yet. It might work, I'm not even sure if its a thing yet but- it'll hit quite close to the bone. And on some level I think it needs to, but on another… what if it's too far?"
I stared at her searchingly, needing answers and feeling slightly crestfallen that her confused face wasn't providing any.
She stared back at me, openly nonplussed, and we remained like that until the flocking of students from the hall told us it was time to head to class.
XXXXXXXXXXX
TEDDY POV
"Hey there you are!"
Victorie jogged lightly down the corridor, quickly pecking my cheek and turning her attention to the group at large. Her cheeks were flushed from exertion and her hair was pulled back into a ponytail, with whispers of silver strands falling silkily along her face. I grinned at her.
"What have you been up to all day, I haven't seen you anywhere-"
She cut me off quickly. "Just at class."
She glanced subtly at Aelius and Craig who were still absorbed in conversation with Malfoy about some the Ravenclaw/Hufflepuff match. Rose was at his side looking beyond bored and smiling shyly at Victoire. "I had to help Lys get ready for her date too."
Conversation screeched to an abrupt halt. Aelius turned to look at her, looking outraged but simultaneously attempting to appear casual. The resulting effect was hypnotic. He kind of reminded me of old photos of Alastor Moody. "Date?" He coughed, slouching lazily against the wall. "Er… with who?"
She regarded him coolly. "Ainsley. Why?"
Aelius laughed in a weird strangled way, looking around the group for support. "Ainsley..? Isn't- isn't he the bloke who ate his flobberworm for a dare in third year?"
I scoffed and Victoire eyed him witheringly. "No, you're thinking of Murtagh. Ainsley is the handsome seventh year who already has a ministry job lined up after graduation."
Aelius scowled petulantly. "What department? Department for Injested Magical Creatures?"
Victoire let her gaze linger for a beat or two as he writhed uncomfortably under it's glare. And she chose not to respond. Instead she turned her focus elsewhere.
"Scorpius, I need you."
Malfoy looked up quickly, puzzlement colouring his features but he shrugged and followed her down the corridor, nodding goodbye to Rose and smiling awkwardly at Craig and Aelius.
Aelius scowled after them both. "Watch out Teddy. Slytherin girls are not to be trusted. One minute they're all cuddly and the next they're venomous."
I rolled my eyes. "What are you even saying?"
"Malfoy, I need you." He purred seductively, batting his eyelashes in a faux Victorie impression. I guffawed loudly as Rose smacked Aelius soundly, glaring at him before walking away.
XXXXXXXXXX
VICTOIRE POV
I glanced back around the corner, making sure all of the boys were gone before turning to face Scorpius fully. He raised a brow at my secrecy, but said nothing. The corridor I'd pulled him down was a dead end, with only one classroom a few metres down that I knew was abandoned and locked. I sighed, thinking how to word this. I'd better just come out with it.
I looked him in his cold grey eyes and began to speak.
"Scorpius. I need you to tell me all you can about the Shaffiqs and anyone involved with them."
He visibly blanched, taking a step back from me. "What the fuck Weasley? Why would you just assume that I would be-"
I raised a calming hand. "Merlin Scorpius calm down! I know you aren't involved but come on, don't play coy. There's no way you weren't at least invited?"
He glared at the wall behind me, his jaw working furiously. "Because of my family? Right?"
I paused. "Because Mathilde Mercier basically expressed interest in you to my face. And in a really predatory way. And not the fun kind of predatory."
He frowned, not knowing what to say to that. "Whatever. Why are you asking?"
I hesitated, checking again our corridor was deserted. "Because… I think Cas- Zabini might be mixed up in them."
He shrugged, looking at me in open derision. "So? You might have forgotten which one you're supposed to be with again Weasley, but it's Lupin now."
I glared haughtily at him. "I know exactly who I'm with Scorpius. It's for Teddy that I need this."
Malfoy's face paled slightly. "You- you can't use this Victoire. They're not people to blackmail. Look at them, they're nutters!"
"I know that! I know this has to be handled… delicately and I haven't ironed all the details out yet, but… it's the only chink in his armour. His only secret of sorts. I'm not going to blackmail him with it."
Scorpius regarded me carefully. "What are you going to do?"
I frowned. "First I need to know he's definitely involved. Then I need to know who else is- the important ones. And then I'm going to confront him. With leverage."
"Leverage? That sounds like blackmail." Scorpius questioned, gesturing for me to elaborate.
I rolled her eyes. "Do you trust me or not?"
