Rule #131 : You are not to reprogram the zeta tubes to change who is allowed to use them.
"Okay, so Jason, Talisman, Deadpool, Power Girl, Betty, Kit, the Team, the Young Injustice Team, Captain Marvel, Green Arrow, Vigilante, Red Arrow, Red Tornado, Shining Knight, the Pizza Guy, the guy that delivers our pranks, and Santa are now the only people that are allowed to get inside the Mountain via Zeta Tubes." Robin told his whole team, getting up from his knees.
He had been working on that job for a few hours now, and he was just ready to collapse, but he couldn't help but smile evilly at his friends. Wally sped up towards his best friend, wrapped an arm around his shoulders, and smiled at him.
"Oh, Roby-poo, what would we do without you?" He asked his friend, making the younger smile even wider. "But, what happens to someone that's not allowed in?"
"Let's get someone in here so you can see." He said evilly, then turned to Jason and Deadpool, who had Superman in their grasps.
They had kidnapped him from Metropolis after Conner had told them about their latest blow up, and now had him subdued after blasting him with red sun rays. Which they did after they broke into Luthorcorp... Maybe the Team was going a bit too far with what they were doing now.
"Of course not, author, not let's get show on the road!" Deadpool exclaimed, making Wally smile widely as the rest of the team wondered why he had spoken to the 'author'.
As Jason and Deadpool dragged Superman towards the Zeta Beam, M'gann couldn't help but start getting jittery. "Guys, do you think this is okay? I mean the League's still mad at us for what we did yesterday, and they couldn't have cooled down so quickly."
Wally rolled his eyes at her as Robin started prepping the Zeta Beam, and said, "Oh, come on, Meggs, we only made Jay-bird, Harls, and Cold part of the League, invited a bunch of aliens to Earth, tried to give random people powers, tried to make Kit a speedster, and gave me, Conner, Kaldur, Jason, and Robin new powers... That's nothing compared to what we've done in the past."
Kaldur rubbed his forehead, and said, "We have never done so much in one day. Or, should I say, you have never done so much?"
Wally smiled cheekily at the Atlantean, then giggled excitedly as Jason told them the Zeta was ready.
"Take a step back, guys." Robin told the Team, who did as told.
The Zeta Beam started, then green, red, blue, and purple lasers started hitting Superman's body, making the 'Man of Steel' start screaming in pain. Everybody there 'Ooh'ed' and 'Aahh'ed' at the sight before them, seeing a very beautiful light show. Then, once the lasers were done with Superman, he was coughing in pain and his body was smoking.
"That was pretty." M'gann said distractedly, holding onto Conner's hand.
The clone squeezed hers' lightly, then smiled down at his girlfriend. "Not as pretty as you."
And while the team just shared a nice moment, they were completely oblivious to the fact that the same thing that happened to Superman happened to Batman and Black Canary on the other side.
Rule #132 : You are not allowed to patent alien weaponry and make them for any military.
Kid Flash smiled evilly at Robin, who was staring at him in fear. Well, he was staring more at Kid's arm than anything else.
"What? Don't you like my new and improved... Wait for it... SCAHM!?" Kid Flash asked excitedly, which made Robin's fear wash out and turn into confusion.
"SCAHM?"
Kid Flash nodded, and shrugged. "Yeah, Super Cool Alien Hunting Mechanism." Then he waved pointed behind him and towards a giant truck. "I have a truck load of these."
Robin smirked evilly at this, then asked, "Where's the nearest Café?"
Kid Flash scratched his head with the arm that had the weapon on it, luckily not accidentally shooting himself. "Why do you need a Café?"
Robin scoffed at his friends stupidity, then said, "We are going to sell all those SCAHM's!"
Kid Flash frowned jokingly at this, and asked, "Shouldn't we be telling the League we have all of those weapons with us?" In a baby voice.
Robin smirked at him, getting the joke. "Why, we would be doing them a favor selling all of these useless things. Sides, we get paid, and before the shipments arrive, we'll just cut off the power."
Kid Flash nodded, then said, "The Café's over yonder." Then he smiled wickedly, picked Robin up, and they both headed towards the joint, money signs the only thing in their minds.
Rule #134 : Do not put Doctor Fate's helmet on random animals to see what happens.
Wally giggled excitedly as he placed the helmet on the animal he picked, the frog. Already they had tried on a dog, which had only made the mutt bark louder and ended up with Conner in the beach. They had also tried it out on a sparrow, but that ended up with Robin having his brains pecked out, and Jason being pooped on.
"I'll show you that I always pick best!" He exclaimed, then waited excitedly as the helmet began to glow.
After the glowing had left, it only left the frog with an oversized helmet, who then croaked and jumped away. Wally's shoulders slumped at the retreating animal, then felt a hand on his shoulder.
"Poor Wallsy, as clueless as ever." Jason smirked, then grabbed the helmet from the floor and walked towards the completely white rabbit in front of him. "Now let's see what happens now." He told himself, then placed the helmet on.
As this happened, Zatanna, M'gann, Raquel, and Artemis couldn't help but sigh. "Why are the guys doing this again?" Raquel asked, lounging on the beach to get a tan.
Artemis smiled at her, then rolled onto her back. "Something about seeing who guesses best."
"Boys are idiots." Zatanna remarked, hearing the screams of the boys as the rabbit started attacking them with magical carrots.
"I agree." M'gann piped in, reading a book quietly under the shade.
"You think they'll ever mature?" Raquel asked, pushing herself up on her elbows to face the rest easier.
Artemis rolled over once more, somehow ending up with her head on Raquel's lap. "Please, Rocky, these are Robin, Wally, Jason, Kaldur, and Conner we're talking about.
"Kaldur and Conner are already pretty mature." Zatanna pointed out, slowly moving to the side so that a carrot didn't impale her.
Artemis sighed, then said, "May be, but they've been corrupted by the rest of the idiots."
As the girls continued their conversation, the boy's were panting hard while glaring at Jason. Their clothes were ripped and dirty, mostly because of the onslaught of killer carrots.
"Never again, Jason." Wally growled at him, then turned to Kaldur. "Your turn, Fish Sticks."
The Atlantean nodded, grabbed the helmet from Conner's hands, then turned towards Wolf. He slowly started to put it on, ignoring the yells of warning from his friends.
"Wait, don't do that!"
"If the Bunny was Bad, imagine the Wolf!"
"Wait, Kaldur, I don't want to die!"
But Kaldur didn't Listen to any of them. He just placed the helmet on Wolf's head, then waited for the blinding light to die down. And, as soon as it did, he found himself being flung towards the nearest tree.
"I told you to not do it!" Wally yelled, speeding away from an uprooted tree.
Wolf just continued his onslaught, the person controlling his mind wanting revenge on the teens for being so stupid and reckless with his powers.
"Maybe they'll never grow up." Zatanna sighed, looking at the scene as the boys ran around, screaming their heads off.
"I still don't know how there's a forest so close to a beach." Artemis acknowledge, already forgetting about her friends in peril.
"Eh. It's the Bat's fault."
Rule #135 : You are not allowed to found your own religion.
"We are here today for the most holiest of times, the time when we reflect on what we've done, and what our God want us to do." Kid Flash started the mass that was being held in the Mountain's hangar, standing up on a makeshift podium.
Behind him were banners with Chimichangas on them, weird symbols strewn in front of said food. The whole team was sitting on stolen benches, along with Jason, Deadpool, Harley, Talisman, Young Injustice, and Captain Marvel. They all held a chimichanga in their hands, slowly eating it as Kid Flash spoke. The whole room was dark, with only candles lighting it, and Kid Flash wearing a black robe with a hood only added to the eerie feeling.
"Our God is none other than the most delicious food in existence, the chimichanga." The red head spoke, holding a giant chimichanga above his head dramatically. "In this day, we all remember the hardships we faced to make this religion, and exactly why we hail this food."
But before he could elaborate more, the lights were turned on and Batman stood in the door way with Wonder Woman and Superman. "What's going on here?" He growled, glaring at all the people there.
Kid Flash suddenly pointed at them, and with wide and crazy eyes, he said, "Lo, the non-believers! Capture them so we may sacrifice their evil blood! The Food Gods would be proud!" He said, and before any adult hero could react, all the Chimichanga believers were on them.
Please review. Also, Rule #133 will be the next chapter, because it's going to be long.