I don't own RWBY
Ruby was hungry. That wasn't unusual considering that she was a growing girl, but the cafeteria wouldn't start serving lunch for another hour. This was the young huntress in trainings free period and she was walking to her dorm to raid her secret cookie stash. She passed by an open door and froze as her nose caught a familiar sent.
"Mmmm, cookies," she drooled, eyes glazing over. Walking almost in a trance, she approached the open door but stopped when she realized it was the teachers' lounge.
"Ahh, no fair," she wined.
The red hooded girl glanced around cautiously, and then slowly poked her head through the open door. Taking a quick glance around, she crept into the room. Ruby didn't have to search for long before she found two trays of fresh made chocolate chip cookies cooling on the snack counter. Giving a silent cheer of triumph, Ruby scooped up a dozen of the cookies and started to scarf them down. They were good and just at the right temperature, not to hot not to cold. The gooey chocolate chips and warm soft cookie dough was to die for.
Then the young girl heard the distinct voice of Professor Knox come from the hallway. Ruby went wide eyed and, in a panic, darted under one of the tables. Not the most creative hiding spot, but beggars can't be choosers, she thought sourly.
Professor Knox walked in with Port and Ozpin right behind him. They had had a long day and it was only noon. Knox had to deal with an idiot first year who stuck their hands in a wood planner while the damn thing was still running; the student had to go to the infirmary to get all four fingers on his right hand sown back on. Port had to get Jaune Arc down from a tree the boy had somehow fallen into from the roof with Ms. Nikos say a thousand apologies a minute. Meanwhile, Ozpin had to deal with the Vale council without his coffee, all the while sitting with James Ironwood who was practically radiating awkwardness at the situation that the two old friends had been thrown into.
"That damn idiot's going to get a week of detention for that. I swear, I'd put a dunce cap on his head and make him ware it for a year if I could," Knox grumbled to them.
"Yes, I can understand your sentiment. However, humiliating the young man further would not solve anything," Ozpin stated calmly.
"Bullshit, humiliation is the only way they'll stop doing something stupid. Isn't that right Pinkie," Knox snapped.
"You promised never to talk about that," Ozpin snapped back, his face darkening.
"A yes that reminds me of the time I killed an Ursa with a broom stick," Port said.
The other two men groaned and didn't hear the groan of the young first year hiding under the table they had sat down at. For the next forty-five minutes Port regaled them with the tale as they snacked on cookies and coffee. When it was over Ozpin and Knox had a slight green tint to their faces.
"…and I through it off a cliff," Port finished the story. Knox and Ozpin stared at him blankly for a few moments.
"That's the most mental thing I've ever heard," Knox said, with some disbelief in his voice.
"You are to never repeat that story to any of the students, ever," Ozpin stated firmly.
"Oh very well then. Looks like our brake is up," Port said as he glanced at the clock.
The three teachers finished their coffee and walked out of the lounge, Knox closing the door behind him. A few moments later, a traumatized Ruby Rose crawled out from under the table. She just managed to make it to the trash can and literally blew her cookies. Her appetite ruined Ruby decided to just go to her next class. That night Ruby had a nightmare about Ursas' and broom sticks.
END
This chapter was inspired by bigdogcop36 request. I know it probably wasn't all you wanted but I hope you still find it funny. As I've stated before, I'm not going to ever actually tell you one of Ports stories. I like to let you guys come up with it yourself, and hey if you want you could take one of them and turn it into a story of your own. As always review and leave any request you might have, keep in mind I'm going to keep this story T for the time being.
P.S. is anyone else having trouble with their traffic stats? All my stats are showing zero even though I posted a new one shot in RvB and I'm getting favorites for it. PM me if you know what's wrong.