TTGL Brothers to the End.
Omake Issue 4: Robot Wars.
A/N: This Omake is dedicated to 'Shade the Bat', who missed his entry for the second Omake. Since this week's winner was delayed in his reply, (my fault for posting late) here is Shade's overdue Omake. I'll admit before hand that I don't really watch many Mecha anime, Gurren Lagann being the exception so forgive my lack of knowledge and variety. Hope you all enjoy, please read and review.
000 000 000 000 000 000 000 000 000 000
The air was thick with the smell of oil and heated metal.
"I love the smell of mecha in the morning!" announced Kamina loudly, deeply inhaling the scent of grinding metal and fuel. He strode through the hanger, admiring the huge selection of mecha that had been gathered for the annual Soul Society Mecha Appreciation Society Show.
A rainbow of colours and designs filled the massive space, robots from every era, country and world on display. Kamina and the other members of Team Dai-Gurren traversed the room, examining the exhibitions and speaking with other pilots. "Gunmen, Knightmares and Gundams of all shapes and sizes gave plenty to look at. Not that Kamina was here just for the mecha but rather the wealth of female pilots in tight plugsuits.
The men were less pleasing. Real men NEVER wore tight plastic suits, Kamina decided. He'd noticed that most of the pilots seemed to be brooding, hormonal, emo teenagers. How most of them managed to summon up any fighting spirit was beyond him.
Kamina moved through the crowds, a few names on the display plaques catching his eye as he passed them. Lancelot, Deathscythe, Big-O, Voltron, Guren…
"Wait!" roared Kamina, seemingly unprovoked. He stepped back suddenly and glared at the last plaque. Guren.
His eyes darted to the offending machine. It was a Knightmare frame by the look of it, its metal armour crimson and its build slender and long limbed. One of its arms looked mismatched, longer than the other and remained unpainted.
"What the hell is this?" he blustered. "This scrap pile doesn't deserve the name of Gurren! Come on, its not even spelt right! Worst cosplay ever!"
"Quite you're yapping." snapped a female voice. Kamina turned to see a young woman with reddish pink hair striding toward him. She wore a tight fitting uniform that accentuated her shapely figure.
"Hello!" whistled Kamina, momentarily forgetting his affronted pride. He was partial to redheads. Hell, women in general to be fair.
"Hey, don't gawp at me you damned pervert!" the girl exclaimed as she traced Kamina's line of sight. "First you insult my Guren, then you try undressing me with your eyes. You really are an asshole."
"So this piece of crap is yours then?" laughed Kamina, indicating the red mecha.
"Yeah? I am Kallen, elite bodyguard for a former emperor and master Knightmare pilot. My mecha is the height of technology. What's it to you? " she threw back.
"Oh, nothing. Only that it totally doesn't deserve that name and pales in comparison to my Gurren." mocked Kamina.
The young woman looked ready to punch him in the face until another voice joined the topic. "They are both cheap knockoffs as far as real mecha go."
Both Kamina and Kallen span around, their eyes brimming with flames of passion to see the new comer. It was a young man in shorts and a green tank top. His face was expressionless and his hair was a dark brown. He was visibly toned, the muscles compact but clearly fast and powerful.
"It's you!" accused Kallen, pointing a finger toward him.
"Who is this guy?" growled Kamina. "He just looks like every other conventional teenage emo pilot."
Kallen frowned. "That is Heero Yuy."
"Heero who-y?"
The man came face to face with Kamina. "Heero Yuy, Pilot of Wing Zero.
"What kind of a mecha would you name Zero. Zero just screams loser."
Kallen smacked him across the head. "Take that back! Zero was a great man!"
"Wait, he's a man now?"
"No." responded Heero. "It's that mecha there." he said, pointing at a giant white and blue mecha that dwarfed the two Gur(r)ens. It was of the typical gundam design but had a glorious pair of feathered wings on its back, giving it the look of a mechanical angel.
Kamina tried to hide his impressed look. Kallen was first to recover. "Yeah, well…er…you must be overcompensating for something!"
Thinking on the various over the top sized mecha he, and especially Simon had piloted, Kamina elected not to comment on this. Instead he chose his usual confident retort. "It's still no match for my Gurren!"
"How so? Wing Zero has a beam gun that can destroy spaceships and a giant lightsaber."
"Mine has an arm that can melt anything with intense radiation." added Kallen.
"Yeah…well Gurren has some really big shades…that he hits things with." Kamina explained lamely.
Kallen smiled smugly. "My Guren has super developed reflexes and can cover long distances at high speed."
"Zero can cover continents in a matter of minutes." Heero stated.
Kamina thought of Gurren's slow, lumbering run and heavy movements. Even he was unable to come up with a suitable retort. He settled on his usual problem solving method instead. "There is only one way to truly find out whose mecha is the best. Fight!"
The three pilots manned their robots and gathered on a large, open field a short distance away. A random woman with certain large…assets, whom Kamina had picked out of the crowd, waved a flag, signalling the beginning of the battle.
Kamina was the first to move. He dashed at Kallen's Guren and swung his shades for its head. She caught the weapon in the grey arm and it began to glow. Gurren's shades started to bubble then exploded, despite the fact that there was nothing flammable to create an explosion.
Before Kallan could follow through with an attack, Kamina shoulder barged into the thinner mecha and delivered a punch to its chest. Neither got a chance to retaliate further though.
"It's over." came Heero's voice through the comm system. Wing Zero had risen into the air and now aimed its rather big gun down at the combatants. It was already charging.
"Son of a bitch!" shouted Kamina. Both tried to run, Knightmare Gurren easily outpacing gunman Gurren.
A blinding beam of light roared down from the gun and smashed into Gurren. Kallen managed to avoid the blast, her superior speed serving her well. The energy tore through Gurren's armour, only being blocked from dissolving Kamina through sheer force of will to hold the gunman together. The beam ended and what remained of Gurren collapsed to the floor in a smouldering ruin.
Kamina was badly blooded. He groaned as every breath caused a fresh wave of pain. "Bastards! Gurren is better than this! I'll show them whose mecha is really the strongest. Using Gurren Lagann logic, the harder I try, the bigger my mecha gets. Let's show 'em who's boss, Tengen Toppa Gurren!"
Blue flames erupted around Gurren as it began to grow. Matter poofed into existence to facilitate the growth, the metal armour growing and changing, held together by areas of blue energy. Patterns of blue energy that matched Kamina's tattoos ran through the crimson armour.
The evolution completed itself and Kamina could see the vast expanse of space around him. He looked down to see the Earth underneath one colossal foot. "Ah… That might have been an overkill." he mused. Gloomily he chewed on a cooked chicken leg. "It was worth it. Bet they don't have that smug look on their faces now."
