Mercedes stares at Santana, trying to patiently wait for an answer about what she just interrupted.
Santana looks around and grabs her smoothie, taking a long pull of the cold, green drink. Clearly, trying to buy some time before having to confront her best friend about what she just saw. As the cool liquid slides down Santana's throat, her mind races. Mad at herself for not closing the gap sooner. Mad at Mercedes for not walking into their home just a mere 20 seconds after she did. Mad at Brittany for well, no, she wasn't mad at Brittany. But, she was doubly mad at herself. The Latina knows she needs to lay the foundation before she and Brittany act on these impulses and regret moving too quickly. She can't get trampled on again, she can't hurt Brittany again, but she knows, deep down, that the tensions are rising between her and the blonde dancer because the feelings won't go away...ever. Soon her head really starts to hurt, and she realizes that she has not stopped chugging her smoothie and now she has a brain freeze.
"Fuck" Santana hisses out and places the cup back on the counter and her hand immediately shoots to the bridge of her nose, and she desperately shoves her tongue to the roof of mouth, looking for some relief.
"Alright, alright" Mercedes steps forward and rips Santana's hand from her face, "enough with the dramatics. What the fuck did I just walk in on?"
Santana tries to spin away on the stool, but Mercedes has her hips bracketed, "Just two colleagues having a nutritious breakfast before a challenging, yet fulfilling day at work" the Latina cattily responds with her tried and true Cheerio's smile plastered across her face.
Mercedes eyes narrow, and she just points her finger in Santana's face. "Okay, okay" the smaller girl sighs, " Well you know yesterday after we watched the video, how Brittany and I just kind of left?"
"Um, yeah" Mercedes rolls her eyes, "Artie thought you two hated it and almost hyperventilated about being inadequate until we got your text, which by the way wasn't incredibly professional."
Santana shrugs, "We liked the video. We were ready to move forward, isn't that all you needed to know."
Yet again, Mercedes narrows her eyes at her best friend.
Santana sighs under the diva's gaze, "You're right, I'm sorry. But, it was beyond difficult to watch that video with a discerning eye when it was me and Britt, ya know? That's our story, Cedes. That's our life. That's our heartbreak. There was a lot of non-acting in that video, and we both had to sort out those feelings." Mercedes nods with some amount of understanding before Santana moves on. "The video was amazing though, it captured everything perfectly, the emotions were so raw, and I don't know, even though I know what happens next, I find myself really wanting to watch."
Mercedes grabs Santana's hand, "Okay, great, the video is a success. I don't have doubts about that. What I certainly have doubts about is the fact that Brittany Pierce was in our house at 8:40 in the morning. Your door was closed when I got home last night, so I just assumed you had gone to bed early...alone. What happened?"
Santana takes a deep breath before diving in.
The Day Before…
Brittany's heart was racing as the screen went blank. She recognized the din of conversation around her; both Artie and Mercedes were beyond thrilled with the finished project of "Love You In the Dark". At the beginning of the project, Mercedes wasn't convinced with Artie's silent movie idea for this song. The diva was more compelled by the music video idea, with Santana engaged in the music and not the story. However, after watching the first piece she was all but convinced that this medium was best. Now the audience would be focused on both the story and Santana as she performed the song live on stage. The two creative types were still going over what they thought was best moving forward - perhaps a live performance for a song or two. Give Brittany more time to showcase in certain songs, as the video might solely focus on her. The idea of being separately together. Brittany hated the idea of a video just being about her - this should be all about Santana. The blonde knew she should be engaging in the artistic discourse, helping move the project along. She actually had a ton of ideas that she thought should be incorporated into later videos. Brittany had filmed, edited, and produce a lot of short videos; most people thought Fondue for Two was just some joke of a pastime for Brittany, but she really worked hard to learn all about film and production. She actually helped Santana make a recording video to send out to some music agents and performing art schools, back before Louisville was a thing. Brittany's pretty sure Santana never sent any of those videos out.
Brittany thought it was important that somehow they established Santana and Brittany as individuals. But, even more importantly, establish the two girls as a couple. both in their highlights and lowlights. Make the movies more than just about the music itself, but add some more content. If Santana only performs eight songs, the concert cannot be twenty-four minutes. As a dancer, Brittany told every story through her face and emotions, but even she could not tell their entire story through one dance or even 8 dances. Plus, she knew that at least one of the songs would not even feature her in person. Artie had some ideas about incorporating at least one stage number for just Santana, for her song called "Send Your Love". In the whirlwind of everything going on, Brittany hadn't actually listened to the entire album yet.
Regardless of all the thoughts going through her head, all Brittany could possibly focus on was the small hand clasped in her slightly bigger one, and the familiar light rubbing of Santana's thumb against her own. As the blonde looked down to her lap, she couldn't help the butterflies bursting in her stomach. She slowly took a chance at looking up at Santana to see her counterparts reaction to the piece. What she was not expected were for Santana's eyes to already be locked on her own set of baby blues.
Mercedes breaks through their fourth wall, just as Santana pulls Brittany up, "Okay, ladies, what did you…" before they could hear the end of the Mercedes question, Brittany is being lead out of the conference room, hot on the heels of the Latina. Brittany doesn't ask any questions and let's Santana take the lead.
Santana's hand feels hot as it grips Brittany's, their fingers laced and locked at the top knuckle. Not hot like when she leaves her hand to close to a fire, or when she used to smoke and her lighter would be low on fluid and she insisted she could get it to light. Hot as if electricity was shooting through her veins and she felt alive, and life was pulsing through her hand and the heat, the warmth was something she never wanted to lose. The Latina takes the blonde the backway out to the parking garage, where her G Wagon sat. Did Santana know what she was doing? Not exactly, but she knew that whatever tension was brewing between the two women, the finished product of that video tore it wide open.
"Fuck" Santana breathes, as she stops on a dime by the car and drops the dancer's hand. Brittany looked at the Latina, patiently waiting for some kind of communication. "Um, sorry, I just needed to get out of there. Um, the video was kind of a lot, huh?" The Latina breathes out that question, and her brown eyes catch Brittany's blue, which made clear she felt the same way. Santana tries to casually lean against the door of her car.
Brittany joins her against the car, so the two are shoulder to shoulder. Blonde hair mixing with deep brown. "A lot might be an understatement" she quietly replies, "It was like an actual out of body experience, ya know? I was watching us, be us, and play out all the built up emotions. It felt so real" Brittany can't help but trail off.
"It was real" Santana's voice cuts in, as she boldly stretches out her fingers and laces them with Brittany's. "I think we both know that we can't avoid this conversation anymore" Santana begins to speak, but she is still looking out across the parking garage instead of facing the blonde. "That video made clear that we can't just move on from this, at least it made it clear to me. I don't think I can continue to work this closely with you and just be this close to you" she squeezes Brittany's hand in her own, "without clearing the air. The dust has settled, I think it's time to clean it up."
All Brittany can do is nod, and though she isn't looking at Santana, she knows the other woman sees her reaction.
Santana glances down at her watch, which she wears on her right wrist, "Look, it is almost end of day anyways, what do you say we head back to my place, open a bottle of wine and lay all our cards on the table." She finally turns towards Brittany, and looks at the blonde expectantly. Santana can't get over how after all these years, so much but so little of Brittany has changed. The blonde has grown her bangs out, but still let her hair cover part of forehead with a delicate part. When she was thinking something over, she still lightly chewed on her bottom lip in contemplation. Her blue eyes still sparkle under Santana's gaze, just like they did as teenagers. Her face has thinned out, losing whatever imperceptible baby fat was left in high school. This change might be unnoticeable to anyone but Santana, who had spent the better part of her high school days memorizing everything that was Brittany. Before Santana's mind could wander any further, Brittany let go of her hand and walked to the passenger side of the car.
"Are you gonna unlock the doors, San?" Brittany peaked her head across the front of the car with a small smile on her lips. Santana quickly clicked the car open, before jumping into the driver's seat herself.
Brittany glanced over at the brunette, as she depressed the brake and pushed the small button on the dash that started the car. She giggled to herself as she thought of her old Toyota in Dayton, that she sold for probably the cost of one of Santana's tires before coming to LA. Hell, the cost of the Latina's car was probably more than one year at Ohio State.
"So, you finally got the G Wagon you always wanted?" the blonde mused, as the car edged out of the parking garage.
Santana hums in response, "Luckily, this car and my shoe addiction was the limit of my crazy spending once I made some money. You should have seen the car I was driving before, I don't even think it had a brand name and definitely didn't have two headlights." Brittany can't help but laugh at the thought. Even through high school, Santana was obsessed with cars. Her parents bought her a brand new black Audi convertible when she turned 16, which Santana dutifully totalled when she moved to New York City, Brittany would find out. The Latina was too proud to ask her parents for a new car, so she bought a jalopy off some guy in Queens and drove it all the way to LA. The rest of the car ride was filled with conversation just like this, the two women reminiscing about old cars, habits, anything and everything.
Before long, Santana pulled up to the small garage just outside her and Mercedes bungalow. She briefly hopped out to open the manual door on the garage, before slowly easing her car into its space. Brittany watched as Santana slowly reached forward to turn the car off. It must have been 2 minutes of silence before the blonde dancer spoke up, "So, you ready to do this?"
"Yeah, B" Santana nodded after exhaling deeply, "It's time."
Back to Present Time
"Then we came back here, opened up a few bottles of wine and talked about everything in the past." Santana exhaled deeply, as she relayed the day before as best she could to Mercedes.
Mercedes had taken the stool that Brittany vacated, and just listened to her friend, trying to be supportive and let Santana mitigate these feelings. The diva recognized that between Brittany and Quinn being back in Santana's life, she had probably brought a lot of stress to the girl, but when Santana didn't move on, she knew she had to press.
"But, what does that look like, S? How did she explain everything?"
"As she always has. She has never faltered and deviated from what she believes. Brittany dated Sam because it was safe, easy, expected and predictable. Sam made everything in her life seem attainable and reachable, she never felt like she was letting anyone down." Santana gulps, and hesitates before looking back at her friend, "She said that Sam's lack of ambition made it easy for her be okay not being ambitious." Santana almost whispered. The Latina knew Mercedes would always have a soft spot for the big lipped blonde Bieber back in Ohio. Though Mercedes was now one of the most highly sought after bachelorettes on the west coast, first loves are always hard to get over.
Mercedes took what Santana said in stride, swallowing a rebuttal about the Sam she knew. Listening to Santana speak, Mercedes realized she never allowed herself to feel anything about the Brittany/Sam saga. Maybe now with Brittany back in their lives, she could finally come to terms with whatever she and Sam had all those years ago.
Soon Santana continued, "Brittany made it clear that she was willing to do almost anything for us to turn the page together, and at least be friends again. We really talked about everything. I even told her about the girls here, and in New York, and my fight to get over her. I mean she has heard a lot of it through the music, but it felt good to look her in the eye and tell her everything, you know?"
Santana took another deep breath, "I still love her, Cedes. Everything about this process has made that more than abundantly clear to me. This album isn't about me getting over her, it's me calling out to her, hoping she is still there."
"So, now that she is back and has apologized and you've spoken, you're just gonna start dating again? That doesn't seem right, Santana." Before Santana could protest, Mercedes continued, "Look, I am team Brittana more than anyone. Hell, I am the one that called her to come out here. Even in the past week, you have been more the Santana I know and love, but still, I want you to be reasonable. You are about to embark on a tour, your career is about to explode, do you have time nurture a relationship right now? Don't you think you two should slow down?"
"I've wasted so much of my life not being with her, crying over her, trying to forget her, and now she is in right here, in front of me, saying all the things I have only dreamt she would say to me again. I know it is crazy, but I am afraid of wasting more time. What if she hates LA, hates dancing for me, and in two weeks her bags are backed and she is back to Dayton? I need to make her stay this time Cedes...I need to make it worth the risk for her."
Mercedes shakes her head at her best friend, a little shocked that Santana doesn't see what everyone else sees, "Santana, that girl is CRAZY about you. She picked up and moved to LA in less than a week just because she knew you lived here. Every day she works at a studio that blasts music about your heart break, because of her, and she has yet to miss a beat. She loves you, and I think she is trying to prove to you that you will be worth the wait, because she knows you've waited for her."
"I don't know how much longer I can wait."
The two singers arrive at Hell to the No within an hour. Santana felt much lighter after opening up to Mercedes; she truly doesn't know what she would do without her support system in place. The Latina now has a clear course of action to take with Brittany and their relationship, but she is eager just to see the blonde again. When she is not around the blonde, she is a little sadder, and she realizes because just Brittany's presence lifts her up. However, before she gets to "deal" with Brittany, she knows she needs to address the other blonde from her past looming in her presence.
Santana gives Mercedes a brief hug outside the other singer's office, before heading down towards the legal department. It is amazing how far HTTN has come in just a few years. As she makes her way down familiar hallways, she mentally prepares herself for what is to come. The idea of talking to Quinn makes her blood boil. She always knew Quinn to be harsh and demanding, but Quinn usually showed Santana a softer side, especially when it came to Brittany, and thinking back on what happened that night in their apartment crushed her. She finds herself just outside the lawyer's new space.
The Latina raises her fist and lightly knocks on the door, with her other hand on the handle, which she opens slowly when she hears a muted, "Come in."
"Hey, Cedes, I was just finishing up that contract for the new signee out of Pasadena, but I wanted to clarify the writer's clause…" Quinn quickly spits out as she turns in her chair and faces the door, "Uhp, sorry, um Santana, I was expecting Mercedes."
Santana steels herself, as just the sight of Quinn triggers her, "That's okay. You got a minute?"
"Um, yeah" the blonde quickly stammers, caught off guard yet again by an old classmate. Quinn has never felt so vulnerable in her entire life than she has her first week in Los Angeles. "Look, Santana, I am really sor…"
"It's too late for apologies," the latina quickly cuts off the blonde, "Look, Q, I am trying this whole thing where I don't fly off the handle anymore. But, you being in my life again was not something I signed up for. You made it very clear how you felt about, and your support of me back in New York. I get I was a terror to live with, and I really do apologize for that, it wasn't fair of me to put my baggage in your life and air out that laundry. But I thought you of all people would get me. Would get what she was to me, and what she always would be, would get that hurting myself was the only way I could feel anything, and so I wouldn't hurt myself I numbed myself. I thought you would be the one to break me out of myself, and that was probably an unrealistic expectation of our friendship, but I never thought my best friend would be the one to shatter me further. And that isn't the energy I need in my life anymore. I have my career in check, I have my health in check, and I am finally getting some happiness back in my relationship world. What I don't need is you coming in and pretending that you still have love for me and want to try and kiss and make-up. You ruined this Q. I was by no means perfect, but neither are you. So, for the time being, I am going to respect you as the lawyer of this company, I will respect you as a member of my professional team, but you are not a member of my squad. I don't trust you, I don't particularly like you, and I have too many things going on to try to salvage a relationship from high school that was toxic to begin with." Santana shrugs at the end of her speech.
What Quinn was expecting to be an all out brawl between her and her fiery ex best friend, ended up being a stern, quiet talking to, that left her even more on edge than the one she had with Brittany. Quinn's green eyes are met with Santana's brown ones, and the blonde just nods her head, "Okay, Santana" is all she can muster the courage to say, with tears thickening the back of her throat.
"One last thing, never talk about Brittany in front of me again," and with that the Latina turns on her heel and closes the lawyer's door behind her.
As the door closes, Quinn can't help the tears that flood down her cheeks. To have her two childhood best friends blow her off within days of each other is almost too much to bare. Maybe moving to LA and taking this job was a big mistake. She looks at the pictures she keeps on her desk, and can't help but pickup one her favorites. It was from the summer of their first cheer camp, right before high school, Santana and Brittany on either side of her. The three caught in a fit of laugher. She quickly lips the picture down, wipes her eyes, and returns to her computer.
Brittany had not seen Santana all day, well at least since their moment this morning in the kitchen. Both artists had been isolated in their own spaces working on the build up for the filming of Sweetest Devotion. The song, which was one of Santana's bigger hits at the moment, was going to be shot like a music video, so much of the blonde's morning was spent in blocking. The set was going to be an actual LA street and dance studio somewhere downtown. Mercedes at pulled some strings and one of her friends hooked up with the location. The format of the video was simple, Brittany would be inside the studio dancing, and the video would track Santana on the streets singing the song, following a non descript blonde she thought was Brittany. Finally, the Latina would stumble upon the studio Brittany was dancing in and sing through the glass at the blonde. Brittany was not supposed to notice that Latina, and the end of the video would be Santanna waking up in bed, coming to from her recurring dream.
The blonde was really excited about the premise of the video. It told an amazing story, and she couldn't wait to get it shot, so they could see the final project. Artie was buzzing around all day, making sure people were on point. Right when Brittany had gotten to the studio in the morning,she and Harry got to work in the HTTN studio to make sure Brittany was comfortable with the music. The actually dance sequence in the video would only be about a minute or so, with much of the video focused on Santana, but Brittany wanted to nail her portion.
The team is finally on location at the studio, as Santana spent most of her afternoon shooting the street scenes on a set, afterwards Brittany would go and shoot a few of herself giving chase on the same set. Brittany is bouncing on the balls of her feet in the studio, waiting for Artie to come in with direction. She is stretching out on one of the bars, and she catches a glimpse of herself in the mirror. The costume shop had decided to dress her in a typical lyrical outfit. The blond wore a white halter body wrap that fell into a short skirt with a mesh fabric over the top of her chest. Her blonde hair was braided into a tight bun on the peak of her head, she felt like she was back at Lima Dance Center getting ready for competition. She can't but giggle to herself, as the door to the studio opens and her breath catches as she sees Santana walk in with the rest of the crew.
Santana is decked out in what Brittany has determined as the Latina's signature style - denim and leather. The singer is dark ash skinny jeans with various rips from thigh to ankle, along with high top designer sneakers. The jeans are paired with a long sleeve white shirt, and a black leather vest with silver zippers. Her hair is blown out and a light smokey eye adorns her face. Brittany can't help but smile at the singer, who returns a shy smile back to the blonde. Just as Santana looks like she is going to cross the room towards the dancer, Artie rolls into the middle of the studio.
"Okay team! Thank you to everyone for working so hard today, with all the diligent work we have had so far, this video should be heading to presses by tomorrow morning." The team filling the room clapped in anticipation of the final product, "So this is the biggest filming portion, since we will be doing multiple views on both Santana and Brittany, we are going to start with the in studio shoot, with the focus being on Brittany, but Santana you will be completing your staging outside at the window." The director gestures outside and Santana nods, as she listens intently to Artie's words, "Brittany, you will go through your full choreography, we will have to play with the mirrors in her, so we are probably looking at about 5 takes of full choreo of the song. Does that work?"
Brittany nods just as Santana had before her. Dancing through the song 5 times would certainly be challenging, but Brittany had come up with a lot of content this morning with Harry and she was ready.
"Fantastic! Let's get Santana set outside, and choose the corner angle heading northwest to southeast, so we can get her reactions through the window. Once we are done with that, we will finish with Brittany, as Santana heads back to makeup, and we will complete her take outside. All clear?" Artie doesn't wait for an answer, as he trusts the professionalism of his crew.
Santana gives the dancer a small wave, as she heads back outside and watches at sound techs set up speakers both in and outside the dance studio walls, so that both women can hear the music. Brittany takes her mark for the first shot, and she hears the opening lines she can't help but be taken back to her couch in Dayton where she watched Santana sing this song for the first time, and she throws herself into the dance, and she knows that her emotions, her feelings, her love is bursting through her movement. She wants the camera to catch her reality.
With your loving, there ain't nothing
That I can't adore
The way I'm running, with you, honey
Is we can break every low
I find it funny that you're the only
One I never looked for
There is something in your loving
That tears down my walls
Right after the word walls echoes through the studio, the door flies open and Santana rushes inside. Brittany turns around just in time to feel Santana's hand close around her own, as the Latina pulls and the dancer into her, and plants a searing kiss on her lips. Immediately, Brittany's other hand finds purchase in Santana's long hair, and she reciprocates the kiss without missing a beat.
A faint yell of "Cut" is heard, but Brittany feels like she is underwater in the best of ways. Maybe not surrounded by water, but surrounded by Santana. Another yell of "cut!" is heard, and Brittany groans as Santana pulls away from the kiss.
The two women lock eyes, and without looking away Santana says, "I would say I am sorry, but I am really not." She leans back in and places another small kiss on Brittany's lips. And with that, she marches back out the door with a "back to one!"
Brittany beams as she resets herself.
AN: All mistakes are mine. I do not own any copyrighted material mentioned.