11. Something New
A week has passed, or maybe two, Steven decided. He realized it was pointless to try to track Earth days anymore, but the instinct was deeply embedded in his brain. He was still in the same room, and he's hasn't talked to anyone, seen anyone, or done anything besides eat, sleep, and study the mural on the wall.
He could hear the smooth voice of Buck Dewey in the back of his mind: Time is just an illusion.
That might be true, Steven thought, but that didn't make the passage of time any less boring. Steven wouldn't believe there was anyone else out there in the ship, or whatever he was in, if they hadn't continued to send him food. In fact, his food sometimes told him bits of information about the outside world. At one point his meals had grown even more meager, less water and smaller geometric fruits. This had worried him at first, but then he started to receive even bigger portions and cold, refreshing water after several days(?) of the smaller portions. Gems aren't exactly ones to make calculation mistakes, so Steven assumed there was some reason behind the change.
When he first received smaller portions, he considered rejecting the food entirely. Maybe he would just starve or die of dehydration – at this rate, he would at least die of boredom. But he continued to eat and drink, wanting to see what would happen if they completely ran out of rations; he figured someone would be forced to come see him, maybe kill him since they had no more food, or move him somewhere with more food. But that hope was squashed, along with most of his other hopes, after a few days. His portions came back, larger at first, and returned to the same predictable size.
Without a mirror, or any sort of bathroom, Steven was sure he looked and smelled horrible. He was still in the same tattered clothes from the day he was grabbed, and he had resorted to using a corner to deal with his human bodily functions at mealtime when his hands were free, before returning his palms to their own tiny prison. His body was starting to recover as he noticed his pain gradually getting better, but he could tell his wrist was not healing properly. When Connie had hurt that kid at school – Jeff, maybe? – his arm had been hurt severely enough that he needed a cast for it to heal properly. Steven's cuffs were the closet thing he had to a cast, but they were a poor substitute for medical treatment.
On days when Steven was feeling a bit bolder, he would study his body when his hands were freed. His finger and toe nails had grown longer and his hair felt a shaggier (it might have just been from not showering), but those were about the only things that had grown. The rest of his body felt like it was shrinking: his jeans felt looser and his T-shirt became baggier by the day. The meals were regular and enough, but not nearly the same as his eating habits on Earth. His stomach was much leaner now, and if he pressed into his side he could feel his ribs. He couldn't see them, thankfully, but if he continued like this it would only be a matter of time.
Leaning against the West wall, Steven was absently trying to count the diamonds that decorated the blue room, to compare them with how many he had counted on the East wall earlier.
187, 188, 189, 190… The numbers increased steadily, predictably, for what he was sure just another day in solitary confinement.
But then, something new happened.
Steven fell backwards through the wall, thinking at first he was having an out of body experience. Then, he blinked several times to see a face looking down at him. The wall behind him had opened abruptly and he had fallen through the doorway.
"Get up, you." It was Holly Blue Agate, and to Steven's surprise, Lilac Pearl. The former had a wicked smile traced across her lips.
Steven scurried away from her, back into his cell, although he did not envy the idea of being closed in again. He couldn't use his powers in his blue room (a fact he had learned ages ago) and he wasn't sure about the rest of the ship. Very aware of his cuffs and of the raised diamond insignia on his arm, Steven struggled onto his knees and eventually to his feet, doing as he was told.
It felt odd to stand, he realized – he never stood much in his cell. Maybe it had been longer than two weeks? He couldn't know for sure.
"Good. Not so talkative now, are we?" She mocked him, but Steven said nothing. He was used to saying nothing by now.
Obviously, Steven's silence was not what Holly Blue Agate had come here for. In fact, quite the opposite – this was going to be her last time with the filthy human alone. She wanted one last moment of revenge, and she wanted to enjoy it.
"Listen to me. There is nothing more disgraceful than you, you miserable half-gem." Steven stared up at her, angry that his first interaction in forever was with this horrible gem, trying to intimidate him, insulting him while he was defenseless. Lilac Pearl just stood off to the side, head looking forward into the wall, not acknowledging the interaction in front of her.
"And if you think the little stunt you pulled at my Zoo was any sort of victory, you will soon learn how wrong you are. My Diamond has finally decided what to do with you."
And that had done it. Holly Blue Agate had wanted a reaction, and now she got one. Steven thought, in some small corner of his mind, that the Gems would be showing up given all the time that had passed, or maybe had shown up and negotiated his return, or would be the people breaking his door down. Not only was he terribly wrong, but his wishful thinking set him up for disappointment. No, this was the haughty, angry presence of Holly Blue Agate, telling him that some sort of decision had been made about his fate. He stared up at her, horrorstruck, not sure what to say, but his face betrayed his fears. Holly Blue Agate smiled.
"Did you and your little band of defects really think the Diamonds would not hear of this?" She was advancing into the room now, squatting to be at his level.
She continued, smug. "Well, I do not respond to the threats of traitors like you." She lifted a hand to smack him and was pleased when he flinched. Instead, she grazed a hand along his cheek and cupped his small face in one hand.
"Do you like that? I learned that little trick from your little cross-fusion friend. Make them fear you, then hurt them in a way they don't expect."
Steven didn't know what to do, but he knew he had to do something. Holly Blue's words made his skin crawl, fear gripping his chest. His eyes looked around the room, praying for some sort of respite, but he knew no such opportunity existed. After all, he had studied the room at least a thousand times.
Holly Blue Agate turned her head, but did not take her eyes off the boy. "Pearl?"
"Yes, my Agate?"
"Can you remind me of my Diamond's exact orders? I wouldn't want to defy her, after all."
"Yes, my Agate. Our luminous Diamond instructed that you, the respected Holly Blue Agate to have captured Rose Quartz, to her, alive. She desired to see the gemstone in question herself, intact." Lilac Pearl relayed the information quietly, eyes moving quickly to Steven and away. She looked scared, Steven noted, but probably not nearly as scared as he was.
Holly Blue Agate spoke again, still studying Steven's terrified face. "And Pearl, one last thing. Please remove his security monitor."
"At once, my Agate."
The Homeworld Pearl stepped between them, her face acting as a barrier between Holly Blue and Steven's own. It was a small relief, but Steven was grateful to have the authoritative blue gem's gaze interrupted, if only for a moment. As Lilac Pearl undid his cuffs, she gave Steven one last pained look – she must already know what was about to happen? All she could do was mouth I'm sorry.
The only benevolent gem Steven had come in contact with was hesitating, gazing at the small boy as he hugged his own, newly free, arms. She had a regretful look on her face. Steven thought that it was nice that Lilac Pearl looked like she wanted to help him, despite her status in the terrible Homeworld class system. He didn't hold it against her that she did nothing, though; an act like that could cost her her life, and Steven didn't want that.
"Yes, Pearl, that will be all." Holly Blue Agate snapped at her for stalling. The gem in question gave Steven a final fleeting glance and then briskly walked away.
It was just the two of them now, himself and Holly Blue Agate. She was standing at her full height again, at least twice Steven's own, looking down at him thoughtfully. Her face hadn't turned concerned, exactly, but more inquisitive and curious. Steven had backed up as far as he could go into the room, standing opposite Holly Blue, her frame blocking the doorway. He thought about trying to run past her, but he didn't imagine he could outrun her and whatever sort of guards might be on the outside. He decided to simply stand there and wait, hoping Lilac Pearl would come back, or better yet, his own Pearl…
In a quick flash of motion, the towering blue gem had grabbed Steven's small one in her own. Steven was so surprised that he couldn't react, so she twirled him gracefully and dipped his tiny frame in a ballroom style pose. Then, the Rose Quartz gemstone and the Agate began to glow beautifully, the colors reverberating off the small space in a brilliant flash of color.
Steven felt sick with… power? No, wait, this was all wrong, why was he… they… laughing?
He grabbed their head, confused and amazed and laughing in the scariest voice he had ever imagined could come from his mouth.
First, there was pulling and pain and rejection rejection rejection and there was glowing as they fought, but eventually Opalite stood alone in the blue room, horrifying and deadly.
Come, we have business to attend to.
No, what? We… I… let me go! Stop!
Opalite faltered for a moment as she placed one of her arms against the wall, but Holly Blue's presence in the fusion was too strong.
We will show you what Homeworld does to traitors.
The beastly fusion then dashed down the hallway, its speed surprising both of them.
Like a Sapphire…
They stopped, looking at the reflection of their combined selves, one part pleased and the other part revolted. Opalite was a bit taller than Smoky Quartz, but not much. Their skin pale blue but their face was affixed with two eyes and two mouths, all wicked with Holly Blue Agates's menace. The fusion had Steven's nose and it donned a tattered pink dress with three stars going down the middle. The hair was dark and curly, but it expanded outwards from the head into two pigtails. The worst of it was the arms, though – Holly Blue Agate's arms were directly connected to the shoulders, but Steven's smaller human arms dangled from them at the elbow; they were too short to really do much of anything, and their legs weren't much better. Steven's short frame supported the fusion, accounting for their small stature, with just a few inches added from Holly Blue Agate's presence. Their body was thick like Bismuth, but their legs were supple like Opal's, accounting for their impressive speed. Opalite's arms were so long they grazed the ground as they stood.
They stood there studying themselves for a while, almost certain that they was the first of its kind. The two that raged within them for dominance both fell out over the fusion's own terrifying personality. Aggressive and vindictive like Holly Blue Agate, but irrational and reckless like Steven, the entity bounded down the hallways, knowing exactly where it was supposed to go.
Internally, Steven was crying. Now he understood how Lapis (or perhaps Jasper?) must have felt. It was sickening, your body moving against your will, your mind clouded with the presence of another, pulling and pushing you and just want it all to stop stop stop stop.
I thought you all hated cross-fusion? This is… wrong…please, just stop…
That's true, boy, but there are forces at play here larger than you know.
He continued to try to resist, but there was something about being trapped in this that was far worse than his cell – even worse than the days he spent in the darkness when he first arrived. It was something he had never experience with Stevonnie or Smoky Quartz. In both fusions, Stevonnie in particular, Steven didn't feel like himself, but like more of himself than he could ever be. With Connie or Amethyst, they brought out better parts of him that he didn't know he had; with this, Steven felt nauseating and bubbling with hatred. So much rage, at his captors, at Homeworld, at the lousy Amethysts, at himself, at the Diamonds, and the filthy humans, and the Crystal Gems and it all swirled into a nauseating mixture of feelings that Steven had never had.
He hated it, but the worst part of it was, there was a small, shameful voice in his mind that couldn't deny that part of him liked it, too. Steven was mortified at the thought, but the feeling was undeniable – he felt so strong in this form, like he could destroy anything that stood in their way.
And that is exactly what Opalite intended to do, without Steven having much say in the matter.