I wake up in my room and for a moment it throws me as I had been so used to waking up in my dorm room. And while it throws me, it's also peaceful for just a singular moment. Maybe Juilliard, and Jake's betrayal was nothing more than a nightmare that I was waking from. And for that moment, I feel almost serene. But just as quickly the memories of yesterday come running back like a stamped, and I cringe at the pain of it all.

"Renesmee…?" My mom's voice comes softly from my door. "Are you awake my sweet girl?" My eyes find hers and I nod slowly. "How are you feeling?" I shrug. I don't know how to put it into words, because I don't really feel anything.

"Numb I guess?" I say quietly.

"Can I take a seat?" My mom motions to the bed and I nod. "You want to talk about any of it?" I bite the inside of my cheek while I try to pull my thoughts together.

"I…" I take a breath. "I thought I finally was getting to a point where I was starting to heal. I thought maybe one day I will be able to live normally without my heart breaking all over again when I wake up every morning and realise he's gone again. But then he comes and says that he lied. But who can I trust? The guy who supposedly lied a year ago or the one who could have been lying to me yesterday? What should I do Momma? Do I believe him?" Momma takes a moment before saying anything.

"Do you want to believe him?"

"Yes…" I whisper softly surprising both of us. "But how can I? There's still so many things I don't understand about why he did it." What comes out of my mom's mouth though takes me by surprise.

"I went to see him yesterday."

"What?" My eyebrows pull together in shock; why would she do that?

"Originally I went over there to yell at him. Or something I don't know, but then he opened the door and as I yelled at him Renesmee, I saw the mirrored hurt I see in you. And I know he can give you answers which is why I'm bringing this up, because he asked me to pass a message to you."

"What was it?"

"He'd like to explain everything to you with more depth and he said he'll answer any questions you have, and then leave you be for as long as you want even if that's forever. But he also said if you don't even want any explanation then that's ok too. But even if it's years from now, he'll always be here waiting for you because an imprints never wrong. He said I had to include that part." Imprints are wrong I guess. His voice rings in my mind though, conflicting what Momma had just passed from him.

"I don't know what I should do." Momma offers me and hug and I take it, the comfort of my mother's arms being a safe place right now.

"As cliche as it sounds, follow your heart." So I decide I have to see Jacob again, whether or not my heart can take the pain.

"Then I guess I need to get ready so I can get some answers." Momma smiles softly at me.

"I'm here for you, no matter what you know that?" I nod and smile back.

"I love you Momma."

"I love you too." Momma leaves after that and I pull a pair of soft jeans, a tank top, and my grey Juilliard sweatshirt from my suitcase that I never unpacked last night. Even though it's summer in Forks, the overcast skies threaten to pour at any moment and I can already feel the slight chill in the air. Pulling on my slightly worn converse before walking into my bathroom makes me think of walking around the city with Felicity only weeks earlier, even though the temperatures were so different. The humidity and the warmth of New York City is nothing like the weather I grew up with, but I almost miss it at this moment. But as I put on some simple liner and mascara, I try to not think of that because it makes me think of everything that has happened since then. I look at my hair and see that it's still mostly straight and I pull it into a simple ponytail before leaving my room. My mom and dad seem to have been in the middle of a discussion in the living room, but stop abruptly when I walk into the room. "You heading out?" Momma asks with a slight smile.

"Yeah." I say. "Everything ok?"

"It's nothing to worry about, I promise." Daddy smiles softly, but the tenseness of his body doesn't match his words.

"You don't want me to go do you?" I ask, guessing their discussion was about Momma going to see Jacob and passing along his message.

"I…" My dad thinks through his words before continuing. "I don't want to see you get hurt again, no. But if you think this could bring you closure, or possibly even happiness, then I won't even think of stopping you." I don't know what it will bring me Daddy. But I don't want to wonder for the rest of my life which moment was actually true. Daddy nods at my thought. Sometimes having him be able to read your mind is a blessing, but other times I wished he had never seen what had happened as he knew how deep every word Jacob said that night cut into me. "You can take my Volvo if you want." His blessing of sorts. Call me a daddy's girl, but his Volvo is my favorite car for some reason.

"Thanks Daddy." He and Momma both give me a hug before I walk out the door. A quick run to his Volvo doesn't leave me much time to second guess my decision and the drive to the border feels like slipping into my pointe shoes and dancing the routines I've done hundreds of times. But arriving at the actual border is where I pause. I take a deep breathe. "Don't be a coward." I whisper to myself as I force myself to push down the gas pedal and continue towards the house I spent so much time in. I can almost feel the packs eyes as the group on patrol would have recognized the car no matter what. So it's no surprise that when I pull up, Jake's at the door already, and the major deja vu occurs as I remember an almost identical scene from a year ago. Hopefully this scene has a different ending though,I think to myself as I step out of the car.

Author's Note: One Chapter and an epilogue left. I don't know if anyone is still reading this but I'm finishing it for my own want and need to accomplish finishing it. Anyway, if you do read this- thank you for reading:)

Lizzy