Chapter 41 - Thoughts of Insecurity
As we were watching T.V., Barry walked out of the guest bedroom with sadness in his heart. During the commercial break, he sat down next to me on the couch, wiping away some of his tears. "Hey, what's wrong, man?", I asked him putting my hand on his shoulder. "She's so sick right now... It'll be a while before she gets better, alright.", he replied, placing his hands over his face.
"You're really protective of her... If I had a brother, you'd be the perfect one.", my jelly boyfriend said to him. "You- You really... mean it?!", Barry said, looking up at my jelly boyfriend. "I really do. You'd rather die than let her get seriously injured. I'm sorry you're going through this. You're hurting right now, man. It's gonna be okay in the end.", he replied. Patting Barry on the shoulder, I could see that he was getting better.
"Just sit and relax for a while, man.", I said, looking back at the T.V. Barry looked up at the television, placing his feet onto the coffee table and laying back, like the rest of us. We must have sat there for a couple of hours, doing nothing but stare blankly into the T.V. Occasionally, I would get up and get chips or something, offering my jelly boyfriend and Barry a couple each time.
Barry was never in the mood to eat the chips. In fact, he wasn't even really thinking of the T.V. He had this feeling in the back of his neck, almost as if something inside him was trying to reach out to him. He felt really uneasy, constantly switching back and forth between thoughts of his parents and of his sister. He couldn't remember that much before he came into contact with the chemicals. Come to think of it, he'd never seen his father, or his mother. His only family was his sister, Ella.
Ella laid in the bed, thinking of these very things, just like Barry was. However, she was also thinking of huge questions that she knew none of us could answer. Things such as, What happens after we pass away?, How long do we have to live?, and Why did me and Barry have to be the ones to be like this? She ate carrots on 30-minute intervals, and taking a small sip of water on occasion. She definitely felt better on the inside, but she didn't feel better in her mind.
She eventually was able to lift her head up off of the pillow without having to puke. She was still extremely uneasy, but not as uneasy as before. She sat up in the bed after pulling the covers off, deciding to look out of the window again. She saw that the clouds had dissapated, revealing a beautiful night sky. She stood up and slowly walked over to the window for a broader look at it all. The stars twinkled, bringing about the most aesthetically pleasing sight to her eyes that she'd never seen before.
Barry eventually looked at the clock that was hanging above the T.V. 11:20 P.M., it read. "I'm gonna check up on Ella again", he told us. "Alright", me and my jelly boyfriend said in unison. As he sat up, he looked out the window. It was pitch black outside, but he could barely see the stars from the living room. When he reached the bedroom, he saw something that caused him to lose himself.
He saw Ella standing there, looking out the window, staring into the beautiful night sky. Immediately, thoughts of what they had both had been through flooded his memory. The thought of losing his parents and having to be stranded for a week caused his eyes to immediately start to water. Tears began to flow down his cheek, hitting the floor.
Ella wondered where the sky ended. It seemed to move on and on and on, for a seemingly infinite amount of time. Suddenly, she felt something touch her shoulder. She looked over to find Barry standing there, with tears in his eyes, and his chin was a deep violet. She smiled, wrapping her arms around him in a loving embrace.
He hugged his sister back, sobbing over her shoulder. As they stood there, hugging each other in front of the window, Ella could see that they were casting a shadow on the wall that was away from the night. It was probably the most beautiful shadow that she had ever seen in her life.