Carly paced around her trailer for that agonizingly fast hour trying to think of things she could say to get Sam to stay. There was a knock on the door and Carly froze.
"Well I just wanted to let you know I was headed out. I told…" Before Sam could finish Carly threw open the door and yanked her inside. Carly hadn't realized the strength she had put behind her pull until Sam collided with her and they were both falling. As if in slow motion Sam wrapped her arms around Carly and twisted so her back was the first thing to hit the floor.
"Oh shit" Sam wheezed. Releasing Carly her hand found it's way to her shoulder and rubbed the outside of the bandage.
"Oh my god! I'm so sorry!" Carly leaned up straddling Sam's waist and placed her hand on Sam's chest. Sam had a flash of Carly naked on top of her, her head thrown back with moans of ecstasy escaping her throat. 'Shit shit shit!' Carly saw a light blush creep up to Sam's cheeks and wondered what the girl was thinking about.
"Well as I was saying, I told Richard to stay here. Keep you in and everybody else out until I get back. I know you're probably not happy with that but it's safer this way." Carly leaned down so her face was just inches away from Sam's, her brunette hair cascading around the blonde's face.
"I can't let you go." Carly stated matter of factly, "If anything happened it would be all my fault." Carly let herself lean in the rest of the way and kiss Sam tenderly. The kiss stayed soft and it was almost as if Sam wasn't kissing her back. 'Wait…she's not! Why isn't she kissing me back?' Carly pulled away and Sam's mouth curved down into a frown.
"It wouldn't be your fault, its part of my job, that's how it's always been." She said coldly trying to push away the emotions that threatened to spill over. Carly reached her hand over and cupped Sam's cheek. Sam had no reaction to the contact either, her expression stayed the same and she did not move. Carly leaned down and kissed her harder than before, producing the same results.
"What's wrong with you?" Carly snapped trying to stay calm but it obviously wasn't working. Sam stayed silent then tried to wriggle out from underneath the other girl. Carly was having none of that, tightening her legs she put her full weight on Sam's waist leaning over her placing her hands on either side of her head.
"I need to go." Sam said coolly as though nothing had just happened. In all reality she could have Carly on the floor in a matter of seconds, but she would never hurt Carly like that, nor could she even if she wanted to.
"I can't let you go" Carly repeated. Sam sighed and closed her eyes, seeming to be growing a rather massive headache.
"Listen, nothing is going to happen. I'm going to go, get it over with, then I'll be gone and you can go back to your life." Sam let a little of her rage show, though she knew she shouldn't have. Carly wasn't fazed by it though; in fact it only drove her on. She leaned down and Sam turned away this time, so began kissing Sam's neck, still no response came from the girl. Inside Sam was crying out, begging her to stop, she felt as though her heart would shatter if anymore feelings stuffed themselves inside. Carly reached her sensitive area where her neck met her collar bone and bit down hard.
"Oh god…please…stop." Sam moaned, breaking at last. Carly pulled back and gently licked and kissed the same spot, clearly ignoring Sam. She had to stop her, had to get going. She knew she could take no more of this. Pulling herself together she quickly flipped them over so Sam was on top. Carly wrapped her legs around Sam's waist and locked her fingers behind her neck.
"Why are you trying so hard?!" Sam's frustration gave way, "Just let go!" she yelled.
"I will not let go of you!" Carly yelled right back
"Fine! I'll do it myself then!" As Sam reached back for Carly's legs she twisted her shoulder to fast and felt the gash rip open. She hissed in pain and set her hands on both sides of Carly trying to hold back the painful expression she knew covered her face.
"Let me look at it…please…" Carly said nearly tearing up seeing her in such pain. Sam scoffed at this,
"I thought you didn't care." She snarled, revealing the real problem to a speechless Carly. Sam felt Carly's grip slack so she quickly lifted her body releasing herself from the girl. She refused to look at her; she needed to get out of there before she let everything spill over. This wasn't like her at all, and it was scaring her to death. She was always the strong one, in control, emotionless, but with Carly it was just wave after wave crashing in on her. 'You need to get your shit together Sam!' She scolded herself as she still looked at the wall in front of her. She felt something wet on her shoulder and looked to find she was bleeding through her bandage and it was soaking into her shirt. 'Why now? Of all the freakin times…' She reached over and touched the red blotch, it seemed foreign and surreal to be in this moment, she felt numb. As if appearing out of nowhere Carly was in front of her and Sam just stared right through her.
"I'm going to take this off." Carly informed her quietly. Sam conceded everything in that moment, feeling as if she was somewhere else just watching what was happening. Carly slowly took her shirt off and went for the bandage.
"Déjà vu" she mumbled, but this time when she went for the bandage Sam made no move to stop her, she just kept staring. Carly unwrapped her easily, taking care to not let her perfect chest take too much of her attention. She needed to help Sam, because she knew that Sam would leave when she was finished. She went to her first aid kit and pulled out a new bandage. Sam didn't move, she seemed to be in another world, and it kind of scared Carly. She pulled out some alcohol to clean the bloody cut one more time. As she gently rubbed it into the slash she whispered,
"I didn't mean I didn't care about you, I meant I didn't care about the situation anymore…my mind had filled with awful thoughts, you getting hurt, me never getting to see you again…" She teared up again as she spilled her heart, "I just didn't want you to leave…I don't want you to leave me." Carly let some tears slip free as she finished her bandage work on Sam. She wanted to say more, but she really didn't want to be a one sided conversation when she did.
"Don't cry…" Sam said, so quietly that Carly wouldn't have heard her had there been any other noise in the trailer. Sam reached out and pulled Carly to her, holding the other girl. It broke her to see Carly cry, she knew it would if she had ever seen it, and she wished she hadn't been the cause of it. She started rubbing Carly's back and heard her mumble something against her neck.
"What was that?" Sam was still talking very quietly. Carly lifted her head and looked into Sam's eyes for a long while before saying,
"Sam…I can't lose you ever…I…I love you." She said it with no regrets; no take backs, leaving her open for the other girl to tear her apart if she so wished. Instead of doing that Sam leaned in and kissed her with such passion Carly's breath was ripped from her lungs. Breaking the kiss and leaning their foreheads together Sam smiled,
"I love you too Carly Shay." She knew without a doubt that she was in love with this girl. It was a moment of complete happiness, something she didn't remember feeling since she was a child. She knew something would ruin it soon, but she was just happy knowing she had it at all. She heard Carly giggle and they kissed again wrapping their arms around each other. She sighed knowing she needed to go, she was going to get this dirt bag and return to her love unharmed. Carly's grip tightened as if she had read her mind.
"Please be careful…" Carly sounded as if she would cry again. Sam held her for a long while before letting go and putting her shirt on.
"I will come back, this I promise you." Sam lifted Carly's chin to look at her one more time.
"I love you" Carly and Sam simultaneously smiled and kissed one more time before Sam headed for the door.
"I love you too princess. Lock the door behind me please." Sam said as she walked out the door and on to her car. She knew she was ready now, personal or not she was going to do anything in her power to get back to Carly tonight…anything.