Natasha pulled a pair of handguns from her hidden underarm holsters and took aim. She wouldn't normally be in favor of fighting over a dozen opponents out in the open with only three allies, but Thor and Loki weren't fazed and Clint seemed confident enough in them that she went along with it too.

By about the five second mark after the fighting began, Natasha wholeheartedly agreed with Clint. Both Asgardians hit like semi trucks, and that was before you counted what Thor could do with the hammer and lightning and what Loki could do with daggers and deception, or how flawlessly they worked together. This left SHIELD's top field agents just a few strays to clean up on the flanks, which felt more like a courtesy than a necessity. The fight was made even easier when several of the scavengers screamed something incomprehensible and bolted away between trash heaps as soon as it became clear that the tide was not going to turn in their favor.

It was over in under a minute, with zero injuries to their team. Natasha picked up and examined a blaster gun thing that had narrowly missed blowing a hole through her shoulder before she shot its wielder between the eyes. It was surprisingly light for something so bulky and powerful. Clint, having already retrieved two of his arrows, was now doing the same with a similar weapon. She watched in amusement as the struggle between his longtime preference for bows and a boyish excitement over real-life science fiction weaponry played out across his brows and jaw. In the end, he unclipped a holster from the dead scavenger, strapped it on, and stuck the blaster in it, then shot her a defensive look before she could make a comment. She laughed.

"How thoughtful," said Thor, dropping his hammer back onto his belt. (Neither he nor Loki seemed the least bit interested in the scavengers' weapons, and Loki's daggers were suddenly nowhere in sight.) "They left us their ride." He led the way to the small, bright orange ship their attackers had flown in on. It looked like it had once been a large dumpster, and the inside did nothing to change that impression. Thor kicked aside a few bits of trash on the way to the controls, and Natasha looked for the least contaminated piece of railing to hold onto.

"What language were those guys speaking?" said Clint.

"I believe I heard at least three or four between them," said Loki. He tapped a panel beside the door, which made it shut behind them, while Thor found the right buttons and levers to power up the ship and get it into the air. Then Loki frowned at Clint and Natasha and groaned. "Oh, damn."

"What?" said Natasha.

Loki shot a flat glare at his brother, who looked over his shoulder with a sheepish smile.

"They don't know Allspeak and they don't have translators," said Loki, arms folded. "They fight well for mortals, but exactly how are they supposed to offer their services as expert spies if they can't understand any of the written or spoken languages they'll encounter?"

Clint raised his eyebrows at her at the remark about their mortal fighting prowess, but this definitely sounded like a problem. "Translators?" she said. "Are those something we can pick up around here?"

"Why yes, what an excellent idea," said Loki, eyes still on Thor. "Did you happen to bring any local currency so that we can buy a couple of translator implants?"

Thor grimaced. That was a no, then. Loki briefly pressed thumb and forefinger to his temples. "Did you, in fact, make any preparations for coming here at all?"

"Well there wasn't exactly time," Thor protested, waving an arm at the approaching city. "We only have the one shot to stop Thanos getting an army from Sakaar, and we had to take it."

"And we're off to a marvelous start," said Loki.

"Wait, these translators are implants?" said Clint nervously. Natasha didn't particularly like the sound of that either.

"They're nothing to worry about," said Thor, turning from the controls to give them a reassuring smile. "Nearly everyone who travels between planets has them. They're not as good as Allspeak, but most species aren't capable of learning it anyway."

Natasha was not reassured. "We should've let Coulson have the assignment," she muttered.

"Okay, so we get these translators, and then what's the plan?" said Clint. "Stopping a world-destroying warlord from getting an army is a few orders of magnitude above the kind of missions we're used to."

"Oh, of course," said Thor. "First, we find out where Thanos's minions landed their ship."

"Yeah," said Clint.

"Then we learn whatever details we can about their intentions for the army."

"Yeah…"

"And then we destroy them and their ship, and possibly the army." He beamed at them. They did not reciprocate.

"That's not a plan," said Natasha. "That's a list of objectives."

"We were kinda hoping for more details," said Clint. "The kind of enemies we're dealing with, rendezvous points if we lose contact, maps, schematics, exit strategies…?"

"We can work those out as we go," said Thor. "Where's your sense of adventure?" Loki wasn't the only one glaring at him now.

Over the next few minutes, more and more buildings popped up amid the fields of piled garbage they passed, their size and quality gradually improving, even if the smell never changed. Not long after they reached the city proper, Thor found a relatively secluded alley and landed the stolen ship. The four of them disembarked into a shabby but busy market square. Natasha was really looking forward to going noseblind soon, but it definitely hadn't happened yet.

"So, did you have a solution to the currency problem," said Thor, "or did you only bring it up to point out my short-sightedness?"

Loki rolled his eyes and waved his hand. Even though it wasn't the most impressive display she'd seen of his magic, Natasha couldn't help staring when something small, like a thick, clear credit card, appeared in his palm. He tossed it to Thor.

"What's that?" said Clint.

"An access pad to the House of Odin's account in the banking system of the Nova Empire, with whom Asgard is friendly," said Loki. "We aren't, strictly speaking, in the Nova Empire at the moment, but in what little time Thor gave me to research our destination, I found that a large number of Sakaar's portals lead to Nova systems, so there's a fair chance they'll accept their money."

"Good thinking," said Thor.

"I hope you know that if it wasn't for me, you'd have starved to death on some uninhabitable rock thousands of lightyears from home before you reached your fifth century," said Loki.

Thor grinned and threw an arm around his shoulders. "Yes, and if it wasn't for me, you'd have barricaded yourself in the library and been crushed by a pile of books."

"Shut up," said Loki, shrugging him off. "That wasn't a guarantee that it'll work. I say we try it out in a mead hall before you look for translators. Perhaps we'll learn where that ship is while we're at it."

They didn't have to go far to find this planet's equivalent of a bar; there was one at the other end of the square. Natasha kept her eyes on their destination with only a few glances around at the crowd of aliens arguing prices and shuffling past them. This seedy market couldn't have been more different from the cheerful bustle she'd seen on Asgard. Its sheer variety was making her realize just how big the universe was, and how small her life seemed in comparison.

The bar, like the street, contained a variety of alien species. It was lit up with neon-looking light tubes, and every surface was encrusted in dark grime. Natasha noticed Thor scrutinizing the faces of all the patrons. After a few seconds, a delighted smile lit up his features, and he began swatting in the general direction of Loki's shoulder. "It's her! She's here! I can't believe we found her so soon!"

"What?" said Loki, batting the hand away. "Who?" He, Clint, and Natasha all frowned in the direction Thor was pointing. A dark-skinned woman in black leather armor and a blue cape was leaning against the bar, accepting a large bottle of amber liquid from the alien behind it (who was bright green and had tentacles instead of arms).

"Who is sh—" Loki began, but he cut off mid-word. The woman had turned around to take her drink back to her table, giving them a clear view of her. Natasha glanced up at Loki and saw that he was frozen in place, staring at her with wide eyes. She looked back at the woman. She had a pretty face, a good figure, and a lot of lean muscle, but her entire demeanor screamed "Do Not Approach." In the few seconds Natasha watched, three people in the crowded bar nearly walked across her path, saw her, and immediately backpedaled and crammed themselves out of the way. When Natasha looked at Loki again, he was still staring at her with a dazed expression like he'd been clubbed over the head, a tinge of pink now flaring across his pale cheeks.

All the SHIELD agent could do was stifle a snort and hope that an unexpected crush wouldn't be enough to rob the God of Mischief of his tactical prowess.

Thor looked first surprised, then amused and delighted when he noticed Loki's reaction to the woman, but he said nothing about it. Instead, he strode over to the bar, where Natasha could hear him saying something that included "your finest ales" to the tentacled bartender, whose reply consisted of incomprehensible guttural sounds and shrieks. Thor swiped the Nova access pad against something she couldn't quite see, then returned with two bottles of electric blue drink. He pressed them both into Loki's hands, which snapped him out of his distracted daze.

"They do take Nova units," said Thor. "I paid the Aaskavarian enough to keep the drinks coming for a couple hours. Hopefully that'll be enough. Go see if you can convince her to join our team while I get Barton and Romanoff's translators."

"What?" said Loki, clearly horrified. "But—"

"Don't worry, Brother!" said Thor, clapping him on the back. "You'll do fine. Oh, and if you spot a big Kronan named Korg around here somewhere, recruit him too." And he led Clint and Natasha from the bar before Loki could object.

X

Mortified and bewildered, Loki struggled to compose himself. The woman sitting across the room was beautiful, yes, but she was far from the most beautiful he'd ever seen, so how could the mere sight of her have such an effect on him that even the mortals had noticed?

Now that he'd had a moment, he was able to place where he'd seen her before. She had been one of the dead bodies in Thor's nightmare when Loki broke into his mind before the visit to Midgard. But she hadn't been wearing these plain black leathers then. No, she'd been dressed in the armor of a Valkyrie. Perhaps that was why he'd reacted to her like a simpleton. Like all children raised on Asgard, he had hero-worshipped the Valkyrior (not as much as Thor, but that might not have been possible), but they had all fallen in battle when he was a baby, so he never expected to actually meet one. He was going to stab Thor right in the ribs when they met back up. How could he do this to him?

Without warning, she looked directly at him. Her gaze traveled down his body and back up, and she raised an eyebrow. It was hard to tell if that look was appreciative or disdainful, but either way, his insides gave a lurch and his face burned. He would likely be better off turning tail and following Thor, but his feet had other ideas and moved him towards her table. When he got within arm's reach, she tugged one of the bottles from him and popped the cork with her thumb. "I wasn't sure you'd ever actually come over here," she said, clinking the bottle against the one he still held and putting it to her lips.

"I wasn't sure you'd tolerate the company," said Loki, far more stiffly than he would have liked.

Her bottle was already half-empty. "I can tolerate a lot if it means free drinks," she said, then pinned him with a surprisingly sharp gaze. "Even being chatted up by a son of Odin."

Whatever thin veneer of cool charm Loki had been attempting to pull together vanished. He took a swig from his drink in an effort to regain it, but the stuff was so vile that he nearly choked instead. His surroundings weren't helping either, as everything around him was filthy. "What gave it away?" he said through a slight cough.

She gave him a look like he was being obtuse—not the sort of look he often found himself on the receiving end of, but he supposed he and Thor hadn't exactly done anything to obscure their identities. They were both wearing armor that incorporated metal discs to represent Bor and Buri, an honor granted to precious few outside the royal family.

She finished her bottle and called for another, which arrived shortly, while Loki sat there in increasingly excruciating silence. Occasional sips from his drink didn't help, as it continued to taste revolting. That she had recognized him as a son of Odin right away should have made this easier, not harder. It should have been a relief that his position was so obvious to someone who had fought in the Aesir-Jotnar war—particularly someone who hadn't already spent centuries calling him Prince. But could he really flirt with a Valkyrie when she didn't know what he was?

Maybe he could have if he wasn't actually attracted to her.

X

It took about half an hour to locate the upgrades shop the barman had recommended. Barton and Romanoff stuck close behind Thor as they climbed out of the scavengers' ship again and headed towards it. This part of the city was cleaner (though no one would call it clean) and the people walking through the street wore higher quality clothing. Most of them were headed in the same direction. The shop Thor was after was in between a food vendor selling a number of items that were still wriggling and a shop that appeared to be full of arena souvenirs, with everything from banners to masks to toy versions of various warriors. The upgrade shop had a flashing sign above the open doorway that advertised prosthetic limbs compatible with over two hundred species, cybernetic enhancements, and more.

The inside put Thor in mind of a dragon's hoard. Gadgets and circuitry were piled wherever they would fit, leaving only narrow paths to walk through. The three of them squeezed their way along one of these until they reached a counter at the back, but there were no signs of life. "Hello?" Thor called. "Is Urizen Ul'var here? We'd like to purchase a pair of translators."

The door behind the counter opened and an alien stepped out. He was humanoid except for very avian features and a thick mane of beetle-green feathers where a human would have had hair. Thor was pretty sure he was Shi'ar, but he'd never actually seen one up close before. "I am Urizen," he said. "I wasn't expecting customers today. I thought everyone would be on their way to the arena. Two translators, eh?" He touched the side of his head and a pair of goggles came down over his eyes, magnifying them and giving him an even more bird-like appearance. He scrutinized Barton and Romanoff, who were staring blankly at him. Romanoff offered a feeble smile. "Hmm. Were their old translators damaged?"

"They've never had them," said Thor. "They're from Earth. This is their first day off-world."

"Never had translators?" said Ul'var incredulously.

"Is that going to be a problem?" said Thor.

"Not...exactly," said Ul'var.

"Perhaps we should find someone else to help us," said Thor.

Ul'var raised his feathery eyebrows. "It wouldn't make a difference. They're adults. Their brains are fully developed. I'm not saying the translators won't work, but the adjustment period isn't going to be pleasant for them. I just want to make that clear, because all sales are final."

"What's he saying?" said Romanoff.

Thor smiled at her and Barton. "Oh, just that the translators might take some getting used to," he said. His voice came out a little higher pitched than usual. "But it's like I said before. There's nothing to worry about!"

Barton and Romanoff exchanged nervous looks.

X

Topaz was in a bad mood. Being in a bad mood was more or less her default, but today especially. She was a creature of structure and routine. Both were already incredibly scarce commodities on Sakaar, but the boss's pompous guests had disrupted what little she had managed to keep in place. Now, she had to oversee the promotion of the big stupid frog guy's arena fights and alert all the scrappers about the trespassers, since the trash field security feed lost them once they entered the city. She'd offloaded the former task as quickly as she could (marketing was not her forte), but the latter was proving annoying enough on its own.

The scrappers tended to demand regular payment if you treated them like proper staff, even when they went weeks without bringing in any new slaves or tech, so the Grandmaster kept them on a looser leash than he did the guards and his enforcers. The only trouble with that was it made wrangling them for a particular task complicated. Only a quarter of them responded to her message within the first hour, but most of those were scattered across territory well outside the city. There were only a couple nearby, and they were useless. She scanned through the list, looking for someone good who was close enough to start tracking the trespassers down today. When she saw the number of the one who was, she ground her teeth.

Scrapper 142.

Topaz hated Scrapper 142. She spent nearly all of her time drowning herself in booze (which, surprise surprise, was exactly what she was doing now, based on her location) and sleeping it off, but the tiny sliver in which she actually bothered to do her job was somehow enough that the Grandmaster was always happy to see her. Nobody got special treatment like that, and she wasn't even grateful! Well, at least Topaz had an excuse to insult her to her face, since she hadn't bothered to accept her assignment.

Topaz scowled as she entered the bar. Being the Grandmaster's second-in-command usually meant she didn't have to come to places this dirty. She spotted Scrapper 142 across the room. Then her mouth fell open in disbelief. The man sitting at the table with her was none other than the mage they were looking for! The big blond warrior and the two less impressive fighters were nowhere in sight, but that was definitely him, and instead of bringing him in, Scrapper 142 was fraternizing with him.

Behavior like this was completely unacceptable. But as she watched them sitting there, her outrage drained away. What she had on her hands was an opportunity, and she wasn't going to waste it. She walked up to the bar with a broad smirk on her face. "You!" she barked at the bartender. When he turned and saw who she was, his eyes widened in alarm, and then he immediately abandoned the customer he was helping and hurried over to her. Yeah, that's right, she thought, sneering.

"What can I do for you?" he asked.

"You can add something special to the drinks you're sending to Scrapper 142's table." She passed him a container of purple capsules. "Maximum dose."

"Of course," he said. "Right away."

"Have you seen the three people that guy was with? They all look like they might be Xandarian. Two blonds and a redhead. Really weird clothes."

"One of the blonds asked me where to get translators for the other two, and I told him to try Urizen Ul'var's upgrade shop."

It looked like Topaz wouldn't need the scrappers after all. Her mood was rapidly improving. She nodded curtly at him and left the bar. Once she was outside, she pulled up the contact for the boss's guests on her wrist display. After a few seconds, a small hologram of the scodey one with no nose popped up. "Hey, Eggsy Mop," she said.

He scowled at her. "My name is Ebony Maw, you insolent—"

"Yeah, whatever," said Topaz. "I've got your special cargo." His haughty indignation changed instantly to surprise and eagerness—not that it was easy to tell with a face like his. "Should be ready to pick up in a few minutes. Take the woman too, or she might make trouble later." She sent him the bar's coordinates and closed the message before he could start spewing more hot air about how great his leader was.

The movies tend to handwave all the language barriers that should exist in an intergalactic story, and I don't really have an issue with that, but I'm not going to ignore that stuff in my fics. We can assume Allspeak takes care of it for the Asgardians, and we know characters like the Guardians and Carol have those translator things. I think the only time the movies actually got lazy was in Infinity War, when Tony, Peter, and Stephen were able to talk to Mantis, Drax, and Nebula (and then Tony and Nebula in Endgame), even though I can't think of a way translators would be any use to the person listening. I get that there wasn't room to deal with it in those movies, though. But what I'm going off of is that the only people we ever actually saw Bruce/Hulk talking to in Ragnarok were Valkyrie, Thor, and Loki, so for all we know, he was never able to understand a word anyone else was saying on Sakaar. Which really wouldn't have been a problem for the Hulk anyway.

Okay, Loki and Valkyrie. Maybe this is going to change in the Loki series, but even though the fandom tends to ship Loki with anyone and everyone, and even though Tom Hiddleston is ridiculously attractive, until the third time I saw Ragnarok, I probably would've said MCU Loki was asexual. Possibly as the result of not living as his actual species and growing up thinking of his own species as monsters. None of his interactions with other characters in any of the movies seem flirty to me (or, if they do, they certainly aren't sincere), and he never seems to be attracted to anyone. I would've been happy to leave things there and write him that way in all my fics, but...well, the way he reacts to Valkyrie in this chapter is basically exactly how I reacted the third time I saw Ragnarok and it got to Loki and Valkyrie's knife fight. Somehow it slipped past me the first two times, but that was hot. I ship it, and some of the stuff from Tessa and Tom's interviews only made the idea more intriguing. So the way I'm interpreting this is that, when it comes to romance, Loki is a lot like Mr. Darcy. He rarely likes anyone. When he does, it comes on very much against his will and he has no idea how to deal with it. Also, whatever might've happened offscreen in the weeks before Thor arrived on Sakaar*, this is different because we're dealing with a much less scarred and jaded Loki.

*My theory about Loki's adventures on Sakaar before Thor showed up is that he was kind of a mess because he believed Thor was dead and Hela would easily conquer Asgard. Maybe he had a crush on Valkyrie when he saw her, but he had to focus on winning the Grandmaster's favor and trust. It's pretty clear based on the way they interact that the Grandmaster wanted to get some alone time with Loki, but I'm convinced that Loki was playing hard to get to keep the Grandmaster interested, but never intended to let it go anywhere (hence casually mentioning a plan to assassinate him when he visits Thor). He looks nervous and uncomfortable in all of those scenes, and he sits as far away from the Grandmaster as he can on that couch.

I greatly enjoyed writing Topaz. I love how unimpressed she and the Grandmaster are by Ebony Maw. It's so much fun.