AN: I do not intend for this story to be crack. However, I fully intend for this chapter to be mind-bogglingly absurd and silly, as I don't have as much interest in a serious story arc for Pokémon as I do other jumps. Laughs will be had.
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I watched the last zubat disappear over the horizon before letting out a sigh. That drawback had gotten annoying real fast.
"Carp carp carp, Magikcarp carp carp."
I turned toward the source of the sound - a magikarp covered in bruises and scratches, and with an annoyed look on its face.
"..Ok, I'm sorry for using you as a bludgeon," I said, before offering him a berry. "No hard feelings?"
The carp Pokémon looked at me for a moment longer, before softening his expression and eating the morsel. A few feet away, Treecko was sitting atop a heap of defeated zubat, enjoying a berry of her own. Nearby was a yet another pile, where a wurmple was unearthing a Whismur that had been knocked out cold from its screaming.
Oh god were my ears still ringing from that.
I admit, I made a point of trying to catch one of every Pokémon I could find when I played the games, which was something I was now starting to regret since, well, I couldn't just take all of them with me. Treecko definitely had a spot in there (note to self, name these guys soon), but as for the others, I didn't know what to do next. I knew I wanted at least one legendary to go with me, but which one?
...Damnit, why do I have to ask all of these hard questions now?!
Ugh. I needed to sort this out later. Deal with completing the gym challenges I wanted first, sort out post-jump problems later.
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Three Days Later
"You stupid twerp! You ain't seen the last of us-"
WHUMP
The grunt promptly fell over, unconscious, with a red carp flopping around on her face.
"...Huh. Didn't expect that to happen."
My Carp Pokémon just ignored that and continued to flop around on the grunt's face.
Fun fact: apparently I wasn't restricted to having to deal with Team Aqua or Team Magma. No, it looked like Team Rocket was also trying to make moves into the region. I'd just gotten into a fight with one of their grunts, who after getting all of her Pokémon knocked out, had gone it a spiel about how her organization would get revenge on me. Treecko had responded by grabbing and throwing Magikarp at her, knocking her out.
Also, I had finally decided on names for my pocket monsters - Leafscale for Treecko and Swirl for Magikarp. As for the Wurmple, he was called Silk. No idea whether he would turn into a Beautifly or a Duskox yet.
...Meh, I could worry about that later.
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Some time in the future
And the first gym was done.
I'd ended up catching two Ralts on the way to the gym. One liked me, the other didn't, so that one went to the boy who gave you a Seedot if you gave him a Ralts. A bit of griding on wild Pokemon later, and Seedot was ready for battle. Together, Seedot, Swirl, and Leafscale had carried me to victory against Roxanne, who had asked for a three on three battle. Somehow, elements of the anime were in here. Not that I was complaining.
One badge down, seven to go. Joy.
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(POV: Fey - Neil's Ralts)
Fey watched as the Zubat swarm attacked the Team Aqua grunts, wondering how this had all happened. One moment, her Trainer had been taking her and the others for a relaxing day of camping, the next Team Aqua had shown up and tried to steal her away from Neil. Then a flock of Zubat had showed up to attack them as well. Now the bat Pokémon and Team Aqua were in a free-for-all, while Neil had just taken the seven of them to a nice open place, sat back, and watched the carnage.
...It did look somewhat funny, especially since no matter how hard Team Aqua tried, they couldn't catch a single one of the Zubat. Some of the humans actually looked like they were about to cry over their failure to catch a single bat.
Scratch that. Two of them were crying. And somehow, Fey thought that their tears would taste delicious.
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~About two months in the future
Today was good. I had just finished getting my fourth gym badge, Leafscale had finally turned into a Sceptile, and the road before me to the next gym was cleared. The sun was shining, the pidgey and swellow were singing, and nothing could go wrong.
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Police Station
Officer Edwards glanced at the jails cells in the station.
Almost all of them were full to capacity with members of either Team Aqua or Team Magma. Several also had some Zubat in them, despite the best efforts of officers and Pokémon rangers to seperate them from the humans.
Frowning, Edwards turned toward one of his coworkers, an Officer Sumeragi. "So, let me get this straight - Team Aqua and Team Magma both tried to rob a kid of his Pokemon...at the same time...while a flock of Zubat were attacking him?"
"Yep."
"And incidents like this have happened at practically every single town the kid has visited?"
"We've even had incidents reported along roads and places in the wilderness."
"And they do this even when it is freezing or hailing?"
"They did it once in the middle of a thunderstorm and a tornado."
"What?!"
"Yes, it happened. I was there. I had to do the paperwork. And run the interrogation. All I can tell is that these people really hate him for some reason."
"What about the Zubat?"
"All I know is that a swarm is chasing that kid for reasons beyond us and that every time he chases them off, they come back bigger. It's gotten so big now that people are wondering if the end times are coming. I don't even know where they roost!"
"Has anyone tried to map out their flight paths to figure that out?"
"Yes. It ended in failure and the scientists doing the research getting totally smashed while crying out how impossible things were."
"I see... This kid is weird."
"Yep."
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Two Gyms Later
Shelby watched as the curent newscaster reported on the most recent sighting of the aberrant Zubat flock, noting that scientists had still not determined where the flock originated from, or why it followed the path it had.
Oh, but did they know that Team Aqua and Team Magma had already figured out the answer to that question.
A phone started ringing. Without missing a beat, Shelly picked it up. "Hey Mica."
"Hey Shelby. How are things going?"
"Good. You see the news?'
"Yep. Also, boss called, says it's my turn to deal with a certain problem."
"Same here."
"..."
"..."
"...run for it?"
"Yep."
"Meet at your house in ten?"
"Sure."
"K. Goodbye."
As soon as Mica hung up, Shelby started packing. She'd prepared ever since Cathy had told her that Team Aqua was going to try and take down that kid named Neil to get his Pokémon. She didn't really mind working for the new Team Aqua - all that had changed when this group split off from Archie's main group was that they were honest about wanting to imitate Team Rocket, and she was fine with being a Pokémon highway woman - but this was too much for her. She could understand her boss's wanting to get revenge on him for humiliating one of their members during a prior attempt to rob him. Continuing to do so even when he was being followed and attacked by an ever-growing flock of Zubat, that was now large enough to blot out the sun. The fact that Team Magma and even Team Rocket also wanted to rob this kid made their decisions even more mind boggling.
Now was the time to get out. Shelby felt lucky that she had squirreled away enough of her ill-gotten gains long in advance - once Mica got here, the two of them could skip town and find a new place to stay. Hopefully by the coast - she had wanted to be a scuba tour guide.
And then maybe Mica would pluck up the courage to ask for her hand in marriage. Of course, Shelby didn't know that Mica had already selected a ring for that occasion. She just had to wait until they found somewhere safe to settle down.
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One Gym Later
As the Zubat flock flew away, I let out a sigh. At this point, I was used to them. And the regular ambushes by Teams Rocket, Aqua, and Magma. These often involved balloons. Sometimes submarines. Occasionally mecha. Stuff that in general made everything here seem silly.
At some point, you looked at the rampant insanity and stopped caring at all.
Right now, a group of scientists were sending out a remote controlled plane to try and study the zubat flock and...wait, did half the flock just turn into clouds?
...I think they did.
...Screw it, onto the next gym!
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Somewhere far, far away, a random omnipotent being laughed as several scientists observing the flock had nervous breakdowns in regard to the impossibility in front of them. How amusing.
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After Gym 8
I smiled as the remainder of Team Aqua and Team Magma were carted off by the police, their organizations now defunct.
Now, apparently, my benefactor had tweaked the universe just slightly - it looked like I had arrived after the events of Alpha Ruby and Omega Sapphire, since the majority of Team Aqua and Team Magma had decided to become humanitarian workers after the incident with Primal Groudon and Primal Kyogre. A couple had broken off and decided to just ape Team Rocket, though they kept the names for brand recognition, I guess. They still fought each other because why not?
As of now, though, they were effectively defunct, since they had thrown everything that they had left at me to try and steal my friends. Fun fact - going after one guy for reasons that can't really be stated and who continuously bests your forces will eventually result in desertions. They'd had maybe ten people total (for both groups) to throw at me after I finally got my eighth gym badge. The fact I had continuously repelled a logic-defyingly large flock of Zubat had also weakened morale. Suffice to say, both organizations no longer existed, to the relief of myself, Archie, and Maxie. Not that I met either of the two - they were still trying to put out the fires their rogue subordinates had started.
All that remained now was to complete the gym challenge. Then my pride would be sated, and I could do whatever I wanted until this jump ended.
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At League Finals, Final Battle
Hastily, Leafscale darted across the battlefield, sliding to avoid Raichu's attacks.
This was it, the final battle against the boy known as Brendan for the title of region champion. Neil had brought Leafscale, Swirl (now a Gyarados), Fey (now a Gardevoir), a Ninjask named Shuriken, an Armaldo named Tam, and finally, surprisngly enough, a Latias (who apparently had a name, but hadn't told anyone what it was). The others had been knocked out by now, as had all of Brendan's other pokemon. Now, all that remained were Leafscale and Raichu.
Raichu used swift, to which Leafscale countered with bullet seed. Raichu followed it up with quick attack, only for Leafscale to counter with Leaf Blade.
On and on the fight went, with Leafscale and Raichu countering each other's blows, looking for an opening to come their way. The fighting lasted for long enough that, at the very end, people were worried that a draw would be declared. Fortunately, Raichu misjudged a thunder punch, giving Leafscale the opening she needed. Before Raichu could recover, Leafscale used Mega-Drain, not only harming her opponent, but leaving him winded. Then, as her oppoent struggled to recover, Leafscale unleashed an energy ball.
A moment later, and Raichu hit the ground, unconscious.
It was done. They had won.
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Silently, Team Rocket's Hoenn executives watched as the boy known as Neil finally realized that he had won. Already they were gauging how powerful he was, and how best to defeat him. He did, after all, best the few remaining ne'er do wells that remained among Teams Aqua and Magma.
Still, he was but one boy. How much trouble could a boy cause?
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AN: There will probably be just one more chapter in pokemon after this, then on to Jump 2. That one will probably be more serious.
Read and Review! This is Flameal15k, signing off!
