Previous Translations: Yorokobi - Pleasure/Delight/Joy
Yokubo - Desire/Lust
Kajo - Excess
Shifuku no Kurushimi - Blissful Throes/Blissful Suffering
Tatakainouta - Song of Battle
Zeitakuna Kutsu - Luxurious Torment
Hentai-ryu: Erokenho - Pervert Style: Erotic Fist Art
Konton - Chaos
Kanzen - Perfect
Henka - Change
Harakainokeru - Dispel
Aka-en - Red Flame
Aoi-en - Blue Flame
Kiiro-en - Yellow Flame
Orenji-en - Orange Flame
Tankoshoku-en - Pink Flame
Maho - Magic
Chishiki - Knowledge
Unmei - Fate
Nozomu - Hope
Hoho no Chenja - honestly this one is a mess, but roughly means Changer of Ways
Ryuketsu - Bloodshed
Chikara - Strength
Meiyo - Honor
Budo - Martial Arts
Ikari - Rage
Jumon - Incantation
Himitsu no Sewanin - Secret Caretaker(Keeper of Secrets)
Sento - Combat
Same no On'na - Shark-Woman
Maebure - Harbinger
Shibari no Ashikase - Binding Fetters
Kanpeki - Perfection
Reikan - the closest English word would be Inspiration, but it specifically refers to 'a divine creative impulse'
Sekkyo-sha - Preacher
Aijin - Lover
Kaen Hosha-ki - Flame Radiator (Flamer of Tzeentch)
Himeiwoageru - Which Screams (Screamer of Tzeentch)
Shikkan - Disease
Ai - Love
Zetsubo - Despair
Mi Haito - Undivided/Not Divided
Shibo - Aspiring
Koki - Exalted
Chakra no Bato - Coruscating Chakra/Chakra of Coruscation
Gyokai - Industry
In case someone somehow doesn't know, Hi - Fire
Don'yoku - Greed/Avarice
Yokuatsu - Tyranny/Oppression
Yami no Chichi - Father of Darkness/Dark Father
Raimeiton - Thunder Release, what Naruto has decided to name his mix of wind and lightning chakra
Shuryoju - Hunting Beasts (same word for plural or singular), an alternate name for Fiends of Slaanesh, best word I could find for them
Konton no Omo - Lord of Chaos
Kemonojin - a very jank way of translating Beastmen into Japanese, basically would mean Animal-Human
Gyumao - Ox Demon King
Eiyu - Hero
Gyumahime - Ox Demon Princess
Kajomahime - Excessive Demon Princess
Renkinjutsu - Alchemy
Hankami - Demigod/Half-God
Yuki no Yoroi - Armor of Ice/Snow
Hyoton no Fuin: Yuki no Haka - Seal of Ice Release: Tomb of Ice/Snow
Tsunade stared down Jiraiya and Kakashi, "You stole the Eiyu no Mizu and Taki's jinchuriki?" she asked for clarification, she didn't bother reaching for sake, there was not enough sake in the world for this.
"I wish to return the Eiyu no Mizu," Kakashi clarified, "but I needed to make a tactical retreat with the kidnapped jinchuriki which was kidnapped by Akatsuki and rescued by Konoha." he said as officially as he could manage.
"Where is she?" Tsunade asked, her voice dangerously low.
"With Naruto." Jiraiya confessed.
"Why?" Tsunade asked, she sounded more exhausted than angry which was of slight relief of the two jonin. Jiraiya had never felt more like a jonin who was subordinate to the Hokage, even when the Sandaime had been around it had been more teacher and student, so he could tell Tsunade was angry.
"Naruto can protect her if needed, will protect her, and will be happy to let her go home if she wants to." Kakashi answered, trying to remain perfectly calm. Jiraiya respected the Hatake's Anbu training in that moment.
"If she wants to." Tsunade repeated.
"Have you seen his harem?" Kakashi asked rhetorically, although he regret his choice of tone at the glare he received.
"It's no secret he's a charmer, like me," Jiraiya agreed and wilted slightly as the glare redirected on him, "but she'll probably want to go home." he pointed out.
"Her home was destroyed." Tsunade reminded them.
"Oh." Jiraiya said, "Konoha might get two jinchuriki if Taki can't rebuild then, huh?" he asked.
"Alright, they should be on their way, so we can discuss it with them." Tsunade pointed out, "I want to hear about the kitsune being 'in the grasp of a Kami' from the source." she muttered.
Soon the two were in the Hokage's office with Maemi, "Oh right, the contract thing." Naruto said once he was questioned about the status of the chakra beast.
"Contract?" Jiraiya asked.
"My magnificent self made a contract with the kitsune, which means we should know his name by now huh?" Naruto questioned as he crossed his arms and cocked his head to the left, Tsunade's attention was drawn to the fact that the nodachi was affixed to his back with chakra and had been since before he walked in. Right between the Raito.
"You made a contract and you didn't get his name?" Jiraiya asked blandly.
"He has a name?" Kakashi asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Of course they have names." Fu grumbled as she crossed her arms, "Chomei-san is the Nanabi." she added.
"That explains a lot, I think." Jiraiya said, he did not look confident in that decision.
"Naruto," Tsunade began carefully, "what contract did you make and why did you tell the Akatsuki that a Kami had the kitsune?" she asked.
Naruto shrugged and the Hokage's eyes were drawn to the nodachi again, "It was a verbal contract, but Slaanesh-kaasama acknowledged it." he explained.
"Oh so you can't summon him." Jiraiya said with a relieved tone and expression, a faint smile on his lips that dropped as Naruto's eyes lit up with curiosity.
"Maemi-chan?" Naruto asked eagerly.
"Hang on let's find out." Maemi leaned in to touch the blonde and in a moment they were within what the blonde came to understand was a mindscape, "Kitsune-san?" she asked with a smug grin.
"Do not summon me." The Kitsune growled.
"But my magnificent self can summon you?" Naruto asked with a growing grin of his own.
"Do not attempt it!" The Biju snapped, "I would drain enough chakra that even you would suffer the exhaustion, it would be as if I was ripped from your body, the stress and trauma to your keirakukei and body might not kill you, being who and what you are, but they will debilitate you." he lectured angrily.
"But my magnificent self can summon you?" Naruto repeated eagerly, "Probably decide the amount of chakra too." he realized and the kitsune's eyes widened but the next moment the blonde was back in the Hokage's office and he began hand signs, "Kuchiyose!" he announced, much to the alarm of everybody present.
The Kyubi no Kitsune, even the size of a large wolf, was an intimidating sight, Anbu leaped from hiding in defensive positions around the Hokage, "I hate you." the fox growled at the blonde, nine tails swaying behind his diminished form.
Naruto just grinned happily, hands held proudly on his hips.
Jiraiya blinked owlishly, "No blood, just hand seals and chakra." he muttered, "Also a diminished form, Naruto is in control." he continued in a louder tone in case the Anbu didn't catch on quickly enough to not do something stupid.
Tsunade openly pulled out a bottle of sake and opened it, "Alright, what's the name." she asked bluntly.
The diminished Biju looked aggravated, his lips curled back into a snarl as his hackles and shoulders raised, "Fine," he spat, "my name is Kurama, but I would prefer that not leave this room." he growled as he shot a glare at Naruto.
The blonde shook his head, "My harem should know, and my team might find out, but other than that sure." it was the worst compromise any of the experienced shinobi had ever heard.
"Not like he has any leverage, does he?" Fu asked as she examined the kitsune.
"I can hear you." Kurama hissed.
"Aw cheer up," Naruto attempted, "should my magnificent self summon you for combat the chakra amount will be enough to make you as big as you seem in that mindscape place." he promised, instead of answering the manifested Biju returned to the Fuin by dispelling himself.
"Well," Jiraiya began before immediately hesitating, "uh, that happened." he acknowledged.
"Oh, I thought I hallucinated it, or it was a genjutsu." Tsunade retorted sarcastically, "Actually that would make more sense." she muttered before shaking her head, "Alright, Naruto-kun, you are effectively our edge against the strongest our enemies have to throw at us." she said plainly, "So, while I am considering you for promotion, I'm going to give you some guard missions for the gate and urban patrols before that." she explained.
Naruto blinked, "My esteemed self wants to go defeat Oto no Kuni." he answered plainly.
Tsunade raised an eyebrow, she wanted to argue against the very idea someone could, but she had heard tales of an S rank shinobi crushing a small nation, although she was pretty sure that nation did not have another S rank shinobi defending it. However the horned blonde had apparently surpassed Orochimaru in sheer speed and power if not in outright ability.
"I'll consider it." Tsunade agreed, "Jiraiya should spend some extra time training with you while you're both in the village," she added with a glance at the other Sannin, "Kakashi too for that matter." she finished.
The Hokage was glad that Naruto nodded in agreement, even if he did shrug first, "Sure, my magnificent self still doesn't know that many ninjutsu, even less genjutsu." he acknowledged, "What shift for guard duty?" he asked.
"Seven hundred tomorrow for gate guard duty," Tsunade answered, hiding her surprise as she'd assumed Naruto was specializing in kenjutsu and fuinjutsu, "an Anbu will retrieve you after that shift to show you the urban patrol you'll be tasked with and a schedule for the next week." she finished.
Naruto frowned, "A whole week?" he asked.
"Yes, Naruto-kun, a week." Tsunade confirmed, "Even then you'll still have Kakashi beat for how fast a promotion from chunin to jonin was earned." she added, knowing the information and the reminder that he'd be promoted if he was patient would make the younger blonde more cooperative.
"Normally you'd be made an Anbu, but you're already a Kontonnin and a mask wouldn't hide your identity anyway, even if you tried, so your status as a Ninso should handle any black ops requirements." Kakashi explained.
"Are all jonin former black ops?" Naruto asked.
"No, just the really young ones." Kakashi answered, Maemi thought that sounded backwards but didn't comment.
"What should I do?" Fu asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Stay here until I figure out something better." Tsunade answered with a gesture to the small couch in the office.
The mind of the blonde Uzumaki had wandered, he was proud and confident in his ability with the Henge no Jutsu, he'd even developed his own variant which he was sure was better and more advanced regardless of what Iruka or Sakura thought of it. But he also knew that dojutsu could see through it, and then the thought of sensors occurred to him.
"My chakra is like a beacon to sensors at this point." Naruto realized quietly, earning raised eyebrow looks from Tsunade, Fu, and both of his present sensei at what to them seemed like an unrelated comment, "Well it has to be." he added with a shrug at their look, "Karin-nee commented it was big." he muttered.
Jiraiya knew he should not take the bait, that he should not comment, "Is that all she said was big?" the man asked with a smirk, he could not resist.
"It was not." Naruto responded with a grin, a lecherous grin that Jiraiya matched, student and teacher were on the same page about one thing if nothing else.
"Isn't she your sister?" Fu was confused.
"No, she might be a cousin maybe," Naruto began to answer then his eyes widened, "wait do you know how closely related we are?" he asked his sensei.
Jiraiya, Kakashi, and Tsunade all exchanged uncomfortable glances, "Kushina-san did not have a sister, so you're not closely related enough to cause problems with potential children." the Hokage answered in a manner that was as detached and medicinal as she could manage.
Unfortunately that just made Naruto aware of a key detail, "You knew her too?" he asked Tsunade, clearly taken aback by that information.
Jiraiya sighed, "A bunch of people knew her, how many people besides those in this room know she's your mother is dependent on how many people you told." he explained.
Naruto stared his sensei down for what felt like a solid minute, "Should..." the blonde began as confusion crept onto his face, "was my magnificent self supposed to tell anyone?" he asked, his head cocked to the left towards the end of his question.
Even Fu realized that Naruto had not consciously or willingly told anyone about who his mother actually was, "Wait you didn't even tell Karin?" Kakashi asked.
Naruto just shrugged, "It sort of never came up." he confessed.
"How does that never come up?" Tsunade asked incredulously and the younger blonde simply shrugged.
Kakashi knew he should not laugh but the amused snort could not be helped, "Wow, and we were worried he wouldn't be able to keep quiet about his other parent." he muttered, feeling only a little guilty as wide purple eyes with bright pink pupils focused on him with a suddenly blank expression.
"You couldn't have waited to bring that up?" Tsunade growled as she glared at one of her best jonin who shrugged.
Jiraiya sighed, "Well, he's S rank now and we're already at war with Iwagakure so..." he trailed off as he looked pointedly at Tsunade.
"What does Iwa have to do with anything?" Fu asked, she was curious and wondered why the parentage of the blonde mattered, she thought his strange mutations and abilities were from his Kami and not Kekkei Genkai.
Kakashi noticed the Hokage give a slight hesitant nod of agreement, "Hey, Naru-chan," the silver haired jonin began, "does Yondaime-sama seem familiar to you?" he asked with a gesture to the Hokage monument.
Naruto stared at the monument and caught a glimpse of his own features as a reflection in the window, "Nope." he denied.
"You used to have blue eyes, didn't you?" Kakashi asked with a raised eyebrow as Tsunade searched her desk for something, probably not sake since she knew exactly where that was.
Naruto had assumed his father was an Uzumaki, but from what he recalled the Yondaime Hokage was indeed not Uzumaki, he was a blonde man with blue eyes, "...Oh." he realized as his eyes widened.
Tsunade pulled out a full color picture of the deceased man, "Yes." she agreed, holding it up to him.
Naruto stared, the resemblance wasn't exactly uncanny, with how much the horned ninso had been altered by his boons, but certain key features lined up, "Well that explains a lot." Maemi muttered as she examined the picture as well.
Then the fact of what happened on the night of his birth hit Naruto and his body tensed up, he frowned, "Kurama knew too." he muttered, "Of course he wouldn't say though, so that's why he doesn't like me so much." he continued.
Jiraiya raised an eyebrow, "The kitsune hates everyone last I heard." he retorted with a tone as arid as Kaze no Kuni.
Naruto shook his head, "Doubt it, he definitely didn't hate Chomei." he responded, "But well, the son of the guy who put you in your current jail-" then his frown became angry, "hey wait a minute he's mad at my esteemed self for that!?" he realized, "We're going to go train, see you later Tsuna-baachan." he grumbled and turned to leave.
The four visible and several hidden shinobi watched him leave with Maemi, "What set him off at the end?" Fu asked once the blonde was gone, keeping her voice down in case he was close enough to still hear.
"Naru-chan hates being blamed for things he didn't do, and for some reason he especially hates it when he's being blamed or targeted for something someone related to him did." Kakashi explained, "Which is weird because I'm sure he'd take responsibility if any of his slaves acted up." he added.
"Well I'm proud of him." Jiraiya said with a firm nod.
"You had nothing to do with his development." Kakashi retorted to take the wind completely out of the Sennin's sails, "I watched him when I could, but if anyone gets credit for his good qualities, it's Iruka, that academy teacher." he explained.
Fu frowned upon learning that the closest thing Naruto had to a parental figure growing up was a teacher at a shinobi academy, but she wasn't sure what to do with that information and the blonde seemed mostly fine even if he was rough around the edges.
"Why did you bring that up in front of her?" Tsunade grumbled to her jonin and the green haired Taki kunoichi tried to make herself as small as possible.
"I honestly don't think it matters if anyone knows after what we saw in Oto no Kuni." Kakashi retorted lazily and when the Hokage glanced at Jiraiya to see what he thought the old man nodded in agreement. Fu supposed that at least she wasn't going to be killed for knowing, but she was still floored by the information.
Kakashi wondered if Jiraiya or Tsunade could see how uncomfortable some of the Anbu were, but the men were well trained and disciplined, Jiraiya was observant enough despite spending time as a hermit and he was an espionage specialist.
Tsunade was too used to having the Anbu around as guards to be bothered by how uncomfortable they were, although if they weren't hiding it so well the Hokage would have noticed for certain.
Maemi followed Naruto, she wasn't surprised mention of the people who gave birth to him still evoked such an emotional response, he still resided in his physical form after all, but she had assumed it would be dulled by his deepened connection to Slaanesh.
The former Imp could feel him through that connection, the horned blonde was no doubt a Daemon Prince, but his remaining human form was unique. It had something to do with chakra, she was certain of that much, but there were too many variables for her to know for certain which chakra or energies were responsible for what.
So as the Alluress followed her bonded lord to a training ground she considered the energies that the blonde had access to. His own chakra and that of the Biju were practically a given, Naruto would have those regardless, the energies of the warp were similar enough to the spiritual, or yin, that made up chakra, but the Biju was almost entirely physical, yang energy.
Maemi almost stopped her stride as it clicked, something was strange about Kurama, the kitsune was almost entirely physical energy but lacked a physical body so it had unbalanced Naruto's chakra, but she frowned as she realized that while this was true it didn't explain anything.
Then there was the strange pink energy of the fallen star, a meteorite that had clearly been tainted by something, something different from chakra and similar to the energies of the warp, but almost crystalized. Maemi considered the pink markings as she frowned, they indicated that the strange pink energy was perhaps the key to the mystery of Naruto keeping his mortal form despite achieving Apotheosis. She wouldn't know for certain unless another shinobi ascended but didn't keep their body, and even then she'd still have to wonder further until a jinchuriki ascended as well to confirm whether or not the presence of a secondary chakra was necessary.
Another energy was to be considered, natural energies that the Juin that Orochimaru invented could draw in and mix with chakra, but Maemi wasn't sure if that was even relevant. She wouldn't even consider it if not for the simple fact that Naruto's body had absorbed a little bit when he had 'died' as Karin put it.
It wasn't a significant amount, it didn't blend with his chakra as far as Maemi could tell, and it didn't stay after he revived and 'possessed himself' so she was sure it had nothing to do with Naruto keeping his form. It was just strange to learn that the Juin or whatever had been going on with that crazed berzerker was not required to draw in natural energy, she wondered if Naruto could develop a Juin of his own to force the natural energy to blend with his chakra.
Maemi cocked her head to the side as she watched Naruto mold his chakra, making hand signs for a jutsu. She realized she didn't fully understand chakra, according to what she knew it was a blend of physical and mental energy, but only the mortals of this world seemed to make use of it out of the worlds she had knowledge of.
It was powerful too, potent enough that even with only a small amount of blood as sacrifice even a Greater Daemon could be called. It allowed the mortals of this world to practically match Daemons without making themselves particularly susceptible to the dangers of the energies of the warp, and it could even blend with those same energies to replicate what most would call magic but the people of this world simply viewed as techniques.
Breathing fire was the same as a well executed kick to a shinobi, as was summoning a giant red fox with nine tails in the middle of a training ground within Konoha. Maemi realized what Naruto was doing but it clicked too late how big he was making the fox.
"What are you doing?" Kurama asked with a growl.
"We need to talk." Naruto said bluntly.
"We could have done that without you daring to call out my full power whelp!" Kurama snapped.
Maemi sighed, "Why did you call him out so big?" she asked, "We're probably going to get in trouble." she muttered.
"He didn't seem to like being small." Naruto answered with a shrug and the left eye of the kitsune twitched in irritation, "Also to prove my esteemed self can." he added in reference to the threats the Biju had made, "Anyway, we could have talked in the, uh, the uh," he stumbled over his words, "whatever that place is." he decided with a firm nod.
"I am not explaining it." Kurama said bluntly, Maemi didn't blame him, it seemed metaphysical and complicated.
"The point is we need to talk," Naruto said as he crossed his arms, "because you knew my parents." he said bluntly.
Kurama chuckled, "You have no idea." he muttered darkly, "Your true-" he began.
"My true parent is Slaanesh-kaasama." Naruto interrupted without a hint of emotion.
Kurama was taken aback by the statement but collected himself, "The woman who gave birth to you was my former jailer, and the man who impregnated her with you was the one who sacrificed his life to put me in you." the kitsune growled, "The shock of my being torn from her body likely tore up her keirakukei," he mused as he considered whether or not to reveal it, "but my claw through her torso is likely what ended it, damned Uzumaki vitality kept her going while I was subjected to that fuinjutsu so I can't say for certain."
Naruto stared up at the kitsune impassively for a moment, "How did you escape?" he asked.
Kurama was taken further aback, the blonde didn't seem angry or resentful in the slightest, "You-" he began but composed himself, "Pregnancy weakened the Fuin, my escape happened at the moment of your birth." he said.
Naruto frowned, "She risked freeing you to have a-" he began before it hit him that he was the baby, the realization that his birth had inadvertently killed the woman who gave birth to him made him feel sick.
"A foolish woman." Kurama agreed cruelly, "You are similar in ways, but different." he acknowledged.
"Was that an insult or a compliment?" Naruto asked with narrowed eyes.
"Both, you are different in ways that make you better." Kurama said plainly, a glance to Maemi and the Alluress realized the kitsune was being careful about his choice of words due to her ability to detect lies.
Then they were surrounded by multiple shinobi, including Anbu. The kitsune decided not to bother and dispersed back to the Fuin in a large burst of smoke and the popping of displaced air, "Oh yeah, we should have debriefed more people that my magnificent self can do that now." Naruto realized.
"Do what now?" An Anbu growled, the blonde wondered what her name was, he was seeing the cat masked woman a lot lately.
"Control the kitsune fully." Naruto said blandly, he knew well enough not to ask the Anbu woman her name, so he figured he'd find out more about the kunoichi if he came across her when she wasn't wearing the uniform, "We are in a training ground y'know." he pointed out to the panicked shinobi with an irritated huff.
Tsunade landed in the center of the throng where the kitsune had been with Kakashi, Jiraiya, and Iruka, "It's fine everyone," the Hokage began, "Naruto-kun has the Chakra no Bakemono completely under control to the point he can fully manifest it outside of the Fuin, obviously something Yondaime-sama built into it to make him better than Kumo's jinchuriki." she bluffed, giving away maybe too much information even if it was partially a lie.
Maemi knew well enough not to point out any lies as the crowd of agitated and alarmed shinobi slowly dispersed, although she noticed many looking at Naruto warily she could hear some muttered praise. She didn't give away how pleased she was, it would be strange if she started cackling for seemingly no reason.
It wasn't unanimous acceptance but it was far better than when Maemi had first been summoned.
Iruka looked bewildered by the situation, "Naruto-kun, you've certainly gotten stronger." he finally praised, it was perhaps a stupid thing to say, practically rhetorical. The blonde was clearly more powerful than the academy teacher, but his face still lit up with a grin at the praise.
"Yeah!" Naruto agreed happily, "How do you think they'll carve my beautiful face into the mountain? They should make the horns out of ivory, or gold!" he mused with a laugh.
"That is so stupidly expensive." Kakashi pointed out as he watched the last of the crowd disperse until it was just the three sensei, the Hokage, Maemi and Naruto.
"But it'd look so pretty!" Naruto argued with a whine, Tsunade wondered if the blonde was actually ready to be a jonin mentally.
"Just get Sasuke-kun to make them gold." Kakashi pointed out and they all looked at him, "What? He can turn things gold." he clarified with a shrug, "I think he understands not to destroy the economy with it." he added at the mixed expressions.
Tsunade sighed, "I have work to do." she grumbled before she left in a burst of speed to return to the tower.
"Training?" Naruto asked suddenly, alone with most of the people who had taught him how to be a shinobi.
Iruka laughed, "I'd love to, but I'm busy too and there's not much I could teach you that these two couldn't." he assured with a wave before he left as well.
"Want to learn a Raiton no Jutsu that acts like a Doton no Jutsu by causing an avalanche with precise bursts of electricity through the rock?" Kakashi offered.
"Yes!" Naruto agreed eagerly, Maemi couldn't resist a smirk at how easily the blonde pulled powerful techniques from powerful people just by them being fond of him. Also that one time he traded A rank ninjutsu with Sasuke.
Tenten was surprised Tayuya genuinely didn't seem to know more Kajojutsu than her, they could both form their chakra into the whip but the older kunoichi's was darker in shade so Tenten had assumed she knew more.
The idea it was a power difference annoyed the younger of the two kunoichi so she asked her follow up question, "Well, could either of you show me how you introduce genjutsu into sound with chakra?" she asked, she wasn't great at genjutsu but she figured an enemy disabled for even a second was a still target and she needed less than a second to line up those kinds of shots.
Kin shrugged, "Sure, I'll do it." she said, "Are you into Naruto-kun by the way?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.
Tenten's hackles raised as every girl in the room, and Haku, turned to look at her. She wondered if she should have brought Lee or Neji for this, "Uh, he's cute, but I'm not too sure on the harem idea." she answered.
Kin shrugged, "Well let us know if you change your mind." she said, "As long as Hinata-chan and Karin-chan don't mind you then you're probably fine, those two are the most territorial." she explained.
"Will be fine." Tenten corrected absently before she realized what she said, "Maybe, probably not definitely." she clarified a little too quickly.
Kin nodded, "I get it." she agreed as Karin mumbled something about not being territorial, "Isaribi-chan is the least territorial." she added.
Hanako's voice drifted down the hall, not so much a word as a sound of indignant rage at being implied to be territorial about who spent time there.
"Hanako is the least territorial." Kin corrected quickly, she did not want the bipolar former Chigiri kunoichi to attack her.
Neji had been understandably distracted by recent events, but having time to process he finally noticed the internal changes he himself had gone through. He hadn't realized what he had done counted as a victory in a challenge, Tenten had not been altered by the clash with the S rank nukenin though and he supposed her retreating while he remained was the reason.
The issue was he had no idea what the organ actually did, he was no iryoninja or biologist so the function of a new organ in his body was a bit beyond him. He did notice that his keirakukei connected to it, along with five new tenketsu.
The placement wasn't too odd, there was technically space there but now that he was aware of it in his torso he felt a vague sense of phantom discomfort, he knew there were no nerve endings there though and everything seemed to be working so he ignored it. Even though he had no idea what the organ was doing.
Neji decided to go to the hospital to have a specialist look at it, just so he knew what it did.
Shizune analyzed the ultrasound of Neji's new organ and skimmed the blood test, "It produces amphetamines, no idea what it's using to do that or what stimulates it but that's what it is." she said, not as firmly as she normally would for a diagnosis but boons could be weird at the best of times.
Neji frowned, "Why amphetamines?" he wondered out loud.
"Well it does technically increase physical and neurological performance," Shizune mused, "we'll have to get blood tests done after certain stimuli to know the purpose, such as if adrenaline or something else stimulates the organ, but it has been stimulated already at least once or we wouldn't know about the amphetamines." she rambled.
The idea that it wasn't entirely safe occurred to her but the amount his blood test indicated was so low as to be harmless. If the amount it produced was harmful then it would become an issue but until that became apparent there wasn't much she could do, it was a boon after all.
Naruto liked his new ninjutsu, it was destructive, he was distracted from thoughts of how he could use it in situations without a cliff face when he noticed someone moving towards him fast and from the air.
"Hey Sasuke." The blonde gave the greeting without looking, he recognized the scent of his teammates easily by now.
"I need your help with something."
That stopped Naruto in his tracks, his mind halted as he turned his head sharply towards the Uchiha, "Say again?" he requested, his expression too blank to be natural.
Sasuke glared since he knew damn well the blonde just wanted to hear those words again, "I need your held with something, you dick." he reiterated, his pride refusing to allow him to repeat it without an insult.
Naruto grinned, "Sure thing!" he agreed cheerfully, "Bitch." he added in a sly tone. Maemi was surprised the two still got along so well.
"Just meet me at my shrine, alone." Sasuke said, then he glanced at Maemi, "Wait that's your Muse?" he asked.
"I'm an Alluress now." Maemi said proudly.
Sasuke took in her new size, "Hm, nope, don't like the implications of that." he muttered to himself, "Whatever, your Familiar can come too." he added more loudly.
"You realize my magnificent self can literally hear your heart beating right?" Naruto asked, pointing out that he'd heard what the Uchiha said.
"I know." Sasuke answered, "See you." he added before flying off.
"Describe the Kyubi Jinchuriki."
Kakuzu remained stoic, but internally he was seething. He could feel the incredulous stares of the other Akatsuki members, but the eyes of their leader were something he didn't want to meet any more than Itachi Uchiha's gaze.
"The bingo books need updates on him." Kakuzu began dryly as he maintained his composure, "He's got pink markings, six horns, his eyes are so freaky I swear he must have a dojutsu, and his killing intent is on another level." he said as if he was done and as expected he felt a spike of killing intent weigh on his amygdala, the threat in the air was palpable, he could taste it.
"Yeah, a level above that." Kakuzu said as he pointedly stared at his bosses torso, as if looking through him as he struggled to maintain composure.
Kisame had the gall to laugh, "That brat, alright I have to consider him an honorary Shinobigatana Shichinin no Shu, even if he isn't from Kiri he killed Raiga and took those Kiba for himself. I'd love to see that guy disagree." he finished with a morbid chuckle.
"Well, it seems those Konton no Kami are some kind of power multiplier." Sasori muttered, his voice dreamier and more airy than his fellow Akatsuki were used to hearing from the puppeteer.
"You're just making excuses because you got beat back by genin kunoichi twice." Deidara said with a smirk.
"How did your battle with Sasuke Uchiha fare?" Itachi asked suddenly, deciding he should curtail an argument and curious about the outcome. The Iwa nukenin would have bragged about killing him by now if the younger Uchiha was dead by his hand.
Deidara was silent for a moment, "In my defense," he began, "your leftovers managed to match Tsuchikage-jiji." he said as he boldly met the Uchiha's gaze despite his Sharingan, "I was able to beat his Sharingan genjutsu and push him into summoning some giant bird monster that could control the weather and shoot lightning." he finished with a huff.
There was a long and awkward silence, "They can do what?"
"That seems more important than what Kakuzu reported!"
Kisame just laughed as Itachi blinked very slowly, "Perhaps," the Uchiha began, "Naruto-kun was not bluffing when he claimed the Biju was in the grasp of a Kami." he suggested.
The leader of the Akatsuki's ringed eyes met Itachi's Sharingan, "Nisekami are nothing to the new Kami of this world." the leader spoke, "I do not need servants of Nisekami in my Akatsuki, should any of you notice your partners gaining such a mark or suffering corruption and mutation, execute them." he ordered bluntly.
No one objected, "Kakuzu, you'll meet with Konan to meet your new partner." he continued, and the nukenin all noticed how he said meet instead of find, whoever it was had already been recruited, "Then you will meet Itachi and Kisame in Hi no Kuni, free Hidan, and while Konoha is spread thin and weakened destroy it as you capture the Kyubi Jinchuriki, Nanabi Jinchuriki, and Gobi Jinchuriki."
Itachi remained perfectly still, kept his face perfectly passive and gave the slightest of nods when the leader looked at him.
"Nanabi?" Deidara asked with a raised eyebrow.
"You and Sasori will work on capturing the Ichibi Jinchuriki, thus halting and delaying Suna from assisting Konoha when Ame attacks. The Nanabi is likely in Konoha."
"So, Jashin is not a Nisekami?" Kakuzu asked, the fact they were saving Hidan after what the leader had stated about not needing servants of false gods bothered him.
"There is power to his Jujutsu and immortality, and Jashin may be a violent and malevolent Kami, but I shall see to balance him."
The confidence of their leader would seem like arrogance if the Akatsuki didn't understand exactly why he was so confident.
Translation: Nise means false, I wasn't sure if it should be Nise no Kami, or what I used but I figured saying it as Nisekami is a bit more derogative which makes sense given the term is meant to deride and undermine the figure it is assigned to.