Jennie's POV
We start down a gravel road, and Lisa turns the music off so that the only noise is the little stones crunching beneath the tires. I suddenly realize we are out in the middle of nowhere. I get nervous now; we are alone, really alone. There are no cars, no buildings, nothing.
"Don't worry, I didn't bring you out here to kill you," she jokes and I gulp. I doubt she realizes that I'm more afraid of what I might do when alone with her than if she was to actually try to kill me.
After another mile she stops the car. I look out the window and see nothing but grass and trees. There are yellow wildflowers across the landscape and the breeze is perfectly warm. Granted, the place is nice and serene. But why bring me here?
"What are we going to do here?" I ask her as I climb out of the car.
"Well, first, a bit of walking."
I sigh. So she took me here to exercise?
Noticing my sour expression, she adds, "Not too much walking," and begins along a part of the grass that looks flattened from being used a number of times.We're both quiet for most of the walk, save a few rude snips from Lisa about me being too slow. I ignore her and take in my surroundings. I am beginning to understand why she likes this seemingly random place. It's so quiet. Peaceful. I could stay here forever as long as I brought a book with me. She turns off the trail and goes into a wooded area. My natural suspiciousness kicks in, but I follow. A few minutes later we emerge from the woods to a stream, or really more of a river. I have no idea where we are but the water looks pretty deep.
Lisa doesn't say anything as she pulls her black T-shirt over her head revealing her black sports bra. My eyes scan her inked torso. The way the empty branches of the dead tree are drawn into her skin is more appealing than haunting under the bright sun. She then bends down to untie her dirty black boots, glancing up at me, catching me staring at her half-naked body.
"Wait, why are you undressing?" I ask and look at the stream. Oh no. "You are going to swim? In that?" I say and point to the water.
"Yeah, and you are, too. I do it all the time." She unbuttons her pants and I have to force myself to not stare at the way the muscles in her bare back move when she bends down and pulls them over her legs.
"I am not swimming in that." I don't mind swimming, but not in a random place in the middle of nowhere.
"And why is that?" She gestures toward the river. "It's clean enough that you can see the bottom."
"So . . . there are probably fish and God knows what in there." I realize how ridiculous I sound but I don't care. "Besides, you didn't tell me we were going swimming so I have nothing to swim in." She can't argue with that.
"You're telling me you're the kind of girl who doesn't wear underwear?" She smirks, and I gape at her, and those dimples. "Yeah, so go in your bra and panties."
Wait, so she thought I would come out here and take all my clothes off and swim with her? My insides stir and I get warm thinking about being naked in the water with Lisa. What is she doing to me? I have never, ever had these types of thoughts before her.
"I am not swimming in my underwear, you creep." I sit on the soft grass. "I'll just watch," I tell her.She frowns. Now only in her sports bra and boxer briefs, the black material is tight against her lower body. This is the second time I have seen her shirtless and she looks even better here, under the open sky.
"You're no fun. And you're missing out," she says flatly. And jumps into the water.
I keep my eyes on the grass and pluck a few blades out, playing with them between my fingers. I hear Lisa call, "The water is warm, Jen!" from the stream. From my spot on the grass, I can see the drops of water falling from her now-black hair. She is smiling as she pushes her soaked hair back and wipes her face off with one hand.
For a moment I find myself wishing I was someone else, someone braver. Like Wendy. If I was Wendy, I would strip down and jump into the warm water with Lisa. I would splash around and climb up the bank just to jump back and soak her. I would be fun and carefree.
But I'm not Wendy. I'm Jennie.
"This is one beyond-boring friendship so far . . ." Lisa exclaims and swims closer to the bank. I roll my eyes and she chuckles. "At least take your shoes off and put your feet in. It feels amazing and pretty soon it will be too cold to swim in."
Putting my feet in wouldn't be so bad. So I take my shoes off and roll my jeans up enough to dip my feet over the edge and into the water. Lisa was right, the water is warm and clear. I wiggle my toes and can't help but smile.
"It's nice, isn't it?" she asks, and I can't help but nod. "So just come in."
I shake my head and she splashes me with the water. I scoot back and scowl at her.
"If you come in the water, I will answer one of your always-intrusive questions. Any question that you want, but only one," she warns.
Curiosity gets the best of me and I tilt my head in concentration. There are so many mysteries about her, and here's a chance to maybe solve one of them.
"This offer expires in one minute," she says and slips beneath the water. I can see her long body swimming under the clear water. It does look like fun, and Lisa drives a hard bargain. She knows just how to use my curiosity against me.
"Jennie," she says after her head pops back up above the surface, "stop overthinking everything, and just jump in."
"I don't have anything to wear. If I jump in with my clothes, I will have to walk back to the car and ride back soaked," I whine. I almost want to get in the water. Okay, I know I do.
"Wear my shirt," she offers, which shocks me, so I wait a second for her to tell me she was joking, but she doesn't. "Go on, just wear my shirt. It will be long enough for you to wear in here and you can keep your bra and panties on, if you wish," she says with a smile. I take her advice and stop thinking.
"Fine, but turn around and do not look at me while I am changing—I mean it!" I try my best to be intimidating, but she just laughs. She turns around and faces the opposite direction, so I lift my shirt over my head and grab her shirt as quickly as I can. Slipping it on, I can tell she was right, since it reaches down to the middle of my thighs. I can't help but admire the way her shirt smells, like faint cologne mixed with a smell I can only describe as Lisa.
"Hurry the hell up or I will turn around," she says, and I wish I had a stick to throw at her head. I unbutton my jeans and step out of them. Folding my jeans and shirt neatly, I put them next to my shoes on the grass. Lisa turns around and I tug at the bottom of her black T-shirt, trying to pull it as far as it will go.
Her eyes widen and I watch them rake down my body. She takes her lip ring between her teeth and I notice her cheeks flush. She must be cold, because I know it couldn't possibly be me she is reacting to.
"Um . . . come in the water, yeah?" she says, her voice raspier than usual.
I nod and walk slowly to the bank. "Just jump in!"
"I am! I am!" I yell nervously, and she laughs.
"Get a little running start."
"Okay." I step back a little and start to run. I feel foolish, but I am not letting my tendency to overthink ruin this. As I reach my last stride, I look at the water and stop with my feet right on the edge.
"Oh come on! You were off to such a good start!" Her head falls back in laughter, and she looks adorable.
Lisa, adorable?
"I can't!" I am not sure what is stopping me; the water is deep enough to jump in, but not too deep. The water in the spot where Lisa is standing goes only to her chest, which means it would reach just under my chin.
"Are you afraid?" Her tone is calm but serious.
"No . . . I don't know. Sort of," I admit and she walks through the water toward me.
"Sit on the edge and I'll help you in."
I sit down and close my legs tightly so she doesn't see my panties. Noticing this, she grins as she reaches me. Her hands grip my thighs and once again I am on fire. Why does my body have to respond to her this way?
I'm trying to make us friends, so I need to ignore the fire. She moves her hands to my waist and asks, "Ready?"
As soon as I nod yes, she is lifting me and pulling me into the water, water that's warm and feels amazing against my hot skin. Lisa lets me go too soon and I stand up in the water. We are closer to the bank so it only reaches just below my chest.
"Don't just stand there," she says mockingly, and I ignore her but do walk out a little. The T-shirt bubbles up from the water going under it and I yelp and pull it down. Once it's positioned, it promises to stay put for the most part.
"You could just take it off," she says with a smirk and I splash at her.
"Did you just splash me?" She laughs and I nod, splashing at her again. She shakes her wet head and lunges for me under the water. Her long arms hook around my waist and pull me under. My hand flies up to plug my nose; I haven't mastered swimming without my nose plugged. When we emerge, Lisa is cracking up, and I can't help but laugh with her. I am actually having fun, real fun, not that average watching-a-good-movie fun.
"I can't decide which is more amusing: the fact that you are actually having a good time or the fact that you have to plug your nose underwater," she says through her laughter.
I get a jolt of bravery and move toward her, ignoring the way the T-shirt floats up again, and I try to push her head underwater. Of course, she is too strong for me and doesn't budge, so she only laughs harder, showing all of her beautiful white teeth. Why can't she be like this all the time?
"I believe you owe me an answer to a question," I remind her. She looks off toward the bank. "Sure, but only one."
I'm not sure which one to ask, I have so many. Before I can decide, though, I hear my voice making the decision for me: "Who do you love the most in the world?"
Why would I ask her that? I want to know more specific things, like why is she a jerk? Why is she in America?
She looks at me suspiciously, as if she is confused by my question. "Myself," she answers, and goes back underwater for a few seconds.
She pops back up and I shake my head. "That can't be true," I say in challenge. I know she is arrogant but she has to love someone . . . anyone? "What about your parents?" I ask and immediately regret it.
Her face twists and her eyes lose the softness I was becoming fond of. "Do not speak of my parents again, got it?" she snaps, and I want to smack myself for ruining the good time we were having.
"I'm sorry, I was just curious. You said you would answer a question," I remind her quietly. Her face softens a little and she steps toward me, the water around us rippling. "I really am sorry, Lisa, I won't mention them again," I promise. I really don't want to fight with her out here; she would probably leave me out here alone if I upset her too much.
She takes me by surprise when she grabs my waist and lifts me into the air. I kick my legs and flail my arms, screaming at her to put me down, but she only obliges me by laughing and tossing me into the water. I land a few feet away and when I come above water her eyes are bright with glee.
"You're going to pay for that!" I yell. She fake-yawns in response, so I swim at her, and she grabs me again—but this time I wrap my thighs around her waist without really realizing it. A shocked gasp falls from her lips.
"Sorry," I mutter and unhook my legs.
But she grabs them and folds them back around her waist. That electricity between us can be felt again, this time more intensely than ever before. Why does this always happen with her? I shut my mind off from my thoughts and put my arms around her neck to steady myself.
"What are you doing to me, Jen," she says softly, and rubs her thumb over my bottom lip.
"I don't know . . ." I answer truthfully into her thumb, which still traces over my mouth.
"These lips . . . the things you could do with them," she says slowly, seductively. I feel that burn deep in my stomach that makes me putty in her arms. "Do you want me to stop?" She looks into my eyes; her pupils are so dilated that there is only a slight ring around the now dark green of her eyes.
Before my mind can catch up, I shake my head and press my body against her under the water.
"We can't just be friends, you know that, don't you?" Her lips touch my chin, making me tremble. She continues a line of kisses along my jawline and I nod. I know she is right. I have no idea what this is that we are, but I know I will never be able to only be friends with Lisa. As her lips touchthe spot just below my ear, I moan, prompting Lisa to do it again, this time sucking the skin.
"Oh, Lisa," I moan and squeeze her with my legs. I bring my hands down her back and graze my nails against her skin. I might explode just from her kissing my neck alone.
"I want to make you moan my name, Jennie, over and over again. Please let me?" Her voice is full of desperation.
And I know deep inside there's no way I can say no.
"Say it, Jennie," She takes my earlobe between her teeth. I nod again, harder. "I need you to say it, baby, out loud so I know you really want me to." Her hand travels down and under her T-shirt that I am wearing.
"I want to . . ." I rush the words, and she smiles against my neck, her mouth continuing its gentle assault. She doesn't say anything and instead grabs my thighs, lifting me higher onto her torso as she begins to walk out of the water. When she reaches the bank, she lets me go and climbs out. I whine, certainly inflaming her ego even more—but right now I don't care. All I know is that I want her, I need her. She reaches out for my hands and pulls me up onto the bank with her.
Unsure what to do, I just stand on the grass, feeling Lisa's heavy, soaked shirt on my shoulders and thinking she's too far away.
From where she stands, she dips down a little to meet my eyes. "Do you want it to be here? Or my room?"
I shrug nervously. I don't want to go to her room, because it's too far— the drive will give me too much time to overthink what I am about to do.
"Here," I say and look around. There is no one in sight and I pray that no one will come here.
"Eager?" She smiles and I try to roll my eyes, but it probably looks like a desperate flutter. The heat in my body is slowly burning out the longer Lisa's touch is not on me.
"Come here," she says in a low voice and the heat returns.
My feet pad quietly across the soft grass until I'm only inches from Lisa. Her hands immediately reach for the hem of the T-shirt and she peels it upward off my body. The way she looks at me alone drives me crazy; my hormones are out of control. My pulse speeds up as she looks my body up and down one more time before taking my hand.
She spreads her shirt on the grass like a blanket of sorts. "Lie down," she says, guiding me to the ground with her. She lays me on the wet fabric and props herself up on her elbow, lying on her side, facing me on my back. No one has ever seen me this exposed before, and Lisa has seen so many girls, girls much better looking than me. My hands move up to cover my body, but Lisa sits up and grabs both of my wrists and pushes them down to my sides.
"Don't ever cover up, not for me," she says and looks into my eyes.
"It's just . . ." I begin to explain, but she cuts me off.
"No, you will not cover up, you have nothing to be ashamed of, Jen." Does she mean that? "I mean it, look at you," she continues, seeming to read my mind.
"You've been with so many girls," I blurt out, and she frowns.
"None like you." And I know I could take her answer many different ways, but I choose to let it go.
"Do you have a condom?" I ask her, trying to remember the few things I know about sex.
"A condom?" She chuckles. "I'm not going to have sex with you," she says and I begin to panic. Is this all a game to humiliate me?
"Oh," is all I say and begin to pull myself up. But she grabs my shoulders and gently pushes me back down. I'm sure I'm flush red, and I don't want to be exposed to her sarcastic eyes like this.
"Where are you going—" she starts, but then realization hits her. "Oh . . . No, Jen, I didn't mean it like that. I just meant that you have never done anything . . . like at all, so I am not going to have sex with you." She stares at me for a moment. "Today," she adds, and I feel a little bit of the pressure in my chest dissolve.
"There are many other things I want to do to you first." She climbs on top of me, all of her weight supported on her hands. She is in a push-up position. Her wet hair drips water droplets onto my face and I squirm.
"I can't believe no one has fucked you before," she whispers and she shifts her body to lie on her side once again. She brings her hand to my neck and trails it down, touching me only with her fingertips, down the valley of my breasts, down my stomach until she stops just above my underwear. We are really doing this, me and Lisa. What is she going to do? Will it hurt? A hundred thoughts race through my mind but disappear as soon as her handreaches into my panties. I hear her suck a breath through her teeth and she brings her mouth to mine.
Her fingers move a little, and it shocks me. "Does that feel good?" she asks into my mouth.
She's only rubbing me—how does it feel so good? I nod and she slows her fingers down.
"Does it feel better than when you do it?" What?
"Does it?" she asks again.
"Wh-what?" I manage, even though I have no control of my body or mind right now.
"When you touch yourself? Does it feel like this?"
I'm not sure what to say, and when I just stare at her, something behind her eyes snaps to. "Wait . . . you've never done that, either, have you?" Her voice is full of surprise and something else . . . lust? She goes back to kissing me and her fingers keep moving up and down. "You're so responsive to me, so wet," she says and I moan. Why are these filthy words so hot when Lisa says them? I feel a gentle pinch and it sends a shock through my whole body.
"What? Was . . . that?" I half ask, half moan. She chuckles and doesn't answer, but I feel her do it again and my back arches off the grass. Her mouth travels down to my neck, then my chest. Her tongue dips down under the cup of my bra and her hand massages one of my breasts. I feel a pressure building in my stomach—and it is pure bliss. I pinch my eyes closed and bite down on my lip; my back lifts off the grass once again and my legs begin to shake.
"That's right, Jennie, come for me," she says, which makes me feel like I am spiraling out of control. "Look at me, baby," she purrs.
I open my eyes. The sight of her mouth nipping the skin on my chest sends me over the edge and my vision goes white for a few seconds. "Lisa," I say, and then repeat, and I can tell by the way her cheeks flush that she loves it. Slowly, she pulls her hand out and rests it on my stomach as I try to return my breathing to normal. My body had never felt so energized before, and it's never felt so relaxed as this now.
"I'll give you a minute to recover." She laughs to herself and moves away from me.
I frown. I want her to stay close, but I'm also strangely unable to speak. After the best few minutes of my life, I sit up and look toward Lisa. She already has her jeans and shoes on.
"We're leaving already?" The embarrassment is clear in my voice. I had assumed she would want me to touch her, too; even if I don't really know what to do, she could explain it to me.
"Yeah, you wanted to stay longer?"
"I just thought . . . I don't know. I thought maybe you would want something . . ." I have no idea how to say this. Lucky for me she catches on. "Oh, no. I am okay, for now," she says and gives me a small smile. Is she going to go back to being mean again? I hope not, not after this. I have just shared the most intimate experience I have ever had with her. I won't be able to stand it if she treats me terribly again. She did say "for now," so she wants something later? I am already starting to regret this. I put my clothes on over my wet bra and panties and try to ignore the soft wetness betweenmy thighs. Lisa picks up her wet shirt and hands it to me.She takes in my confused expression and tells me "to towel off." Her eyes shift to the apex of my thighs.
Oh. I unbutton my pants and she doesn't bother to turn around as I swipe the shirt across my sensitive skin there. I don't miss the way her tongue brushes across her bottom lip while she watches me. She pulls her cell phone from the pocket of her jeans and her thumb slides across the screen repeatedly. I finish doing what she recommended and hand her shirt back. As I step into my shoes, the air around us has changed from passionate to distant, and I find myself wishing to be as far away from her as possible.
I wait for her to talk to me as we walk back to the car, but she doesn't say anything. My mind is already coming up with every possible worst-case scenario for what happens next. She opens my door for me and I nod to thank her.
"Is something wrong?" she asks me while she drives back down the gravel road.
"I don't know. Why are you being so weird now?" I ask her, even though I'm afraid of her answer and can't look directly at her.
"I'm not, you are."
"No, you haven't said a word to me since . . . you know."
"Since I gave you your first orgasm?"
My mouth drops and my cheeks flush. Why am I still surprised by her dirty mouth?
"Um, yeah. Since that, you haven't said anything. You just got dressed and we left." Honesty seems to be the best option right now, so I add, "It makes me feel like you're using me or something"
"What? Of course I'm not using you. To use someone I would have to be getting something out of it," she says, so offhandedly that I can suddenly feel the tears coming. I do my best to keep them back but one escapes.
"Are you crying? What did I say?" She reaches over and puts her hand on my thigh. To my surprise it soothes me. "I didn't mean it like that—I am sorry. I'm not used to whatever is supposed to happen after messing around with someone, plus I wasn't going to just drop you off at your room and go our separate ways. I thought maybe we could get some dinner or something? I am sure you're starving." She squeezes my thigh gently.
I smile back at her, relieved by her words. I wipe away the tear that escaped prematurely and with it goes my worry.
I don't know what it is about Lisa that makes me so emotional, in every way possible. The idea of her using me makes me more upset than it should. My feelings for Lisa are so confusing. I hate her one minute and want to kiss her the next. She makes me feel things I never knew I could, and not just sexually. She makes me laugh and cry, yell and scream, but most of all she makes me feel alive.