Chapter 12
There's water everywhere. It's all she can see - deep blue colossal waves towering above like buildings crashing down over her. With each wave, they push her down beneath the surface, appearing one after the other faster than she can take a breath.
She's shivering. She's never been so cold. Her body feels heavy. Her limbs are trembling, and she fights for her life to stay afloat despite how exhausted she feels. She struggles and thrashes as another wave crashes into her. Only this time when she is shoved under, she doesn't come back up.
She's numb, floating lifeless through an endless abyss of black. It's quieter down here, in the middle of the ocean. It's somehow calm and terrifying and comforting all at once.
She looks down at her bare feet through the blurry haze, just floating beneath her. There's nothing beyond them, only emptiness.
Her lungs are begging for air.
She kicks and paddles back to the surface. The sight of it is visible above her head. Rays of light are beaming down onto her from the other side. It's like they're calling her name, so close yet so far away.
Though, no matter how much she swims, that light only creeps further and further away. Everything starts to go dark until she can hardly see through the shadows encasing her.
Her heart is racing now, pounding through her ears. Chest is tight. Head feels clouded and heavy.
She claws at the water, but all it does is slip through her trembling fingertips. It's as if something, an unknown force, is dragging her down.
She screams.
She screams and screams, as loud as she can, but no sound comes out. She pushes harder, straining her throat. But she can't hear anything. She can't see anything. She can't feel.
There's nobody there. All she wants is someone to rescue her, to pull her out of the water so she can breathe again. She imagines what it would be like so vividly – the light on the other side.
The realization that she is alone makes her sob. Then she can't scream anymore. All she does is cry, and she lets herself fall.
Rapunzel wakes with a jolt.
Her entire body flinches. Her heart nearly jumps out of her chest. As she pants for air, she can feel her rapid pulse throughout her rigid body. It's as if she's frozen in place, terrified to move.
As she flickers open her eyes, everything fades back into focus.
She's laying on her side, curled into a ball with her cloak pulled all the way up to her neck.
She sees a burnt pile of firewood on the ground in front of her, surrounded by ashes. She feels the dirt floor she forgot she was laying on, and the patch of grass beneath her head. She sees the walls of the cave encasing her in the side of a familiar mountain. A curtain of damp vines over the entrance are dripping with water. The moon of the night sky is just on the other side. The air smells like leaves and smoke.
Then she sees Flynn sitting across from her.
He isn't watching her. Instead, he's adding planks of wood to the dying fire that is nothing more than a couple glowing embers now. A few lingering sparks float into the air within a rising cloud of smoke.
He looks like he's lost in thought, and his back is turned to her slightly. But Rapunzel can still see the side of his face from this angle and the way the wilted flames flicker shadows onto his features.
Somehow, the sight of him helps her breathe – like she's okay now. She's alive, she isn't drowning. And she isn't alone.
Then she realizes that he'd probably heard her startle awake just now, and embarrassment suddenly washes over her.
Without the firelight from earlier, the small cave is now encased in shadows and blue moonlight. Everything feels darker, quieter, and colder than it had before Rapunzel had fallen asleep.
She rolls onto her back and pushes herself up into a sitting position.
Her muscles are already sore, and it isn't even morning yet. She isn't used to sleeping on the ground.
Rapunzel wraps her cloak around her shoulders to stay warm. She pulls her knees to her chest and aimlessly watches what Flynn is doing in silence.
It sounds like the rain has mostly stopped, with only a few raindrops splattering onto the stone near the cave entrance. Crickets are chirping loudly into the night, their rhythmic sound bringing a sense of ease to them both.
"Nightmares?" Flynn says after a while, not looking over at her. When she doesn't respond, he nods knowingly. "I've been there."
Her chest tightens and a suffocating lump forms in her throat. Rapunzel's face scrunches up as her exhausted eyes begin to water.
It isn't the first time Rapunzel has had them. She's been seeing the same dream in her sleep for as long as she can remember. One would think she'd be used to it by now. But somehow, every time is just as horrible as the last.
Rapunzel wipes a tear off her cheek, sniffling. "You're awake." She tries to sound as bright as possible, but her voice comes out broken anyway.
"Yeah. Couldn't sleep," he says, adding dry leaves to the embers. "Just one of those nights, you know?"
Rapunzel wishes he wouldn't see her cry, but they both know it's too late for that. She's thankful he doesn't say anything about it.
He'd heard her whimpering in her sleep. He'd thought about waking her, but for some reason, he didn't. Maybe he didn't want to disturb or embarrass her. Maybe he didn't want to draw attention to it. Maybe he didn't think it was his place.
He wanted to keep her warm, anyway.
Flynn assumes what the dream had been about. Considering all that Rapunzel has told him about her home life, he's beginning to understand more and more what a nightmare it must be for her.
With both of them now restless, they sit there in silence and listen to the crickets of the night. His company brings Rapunzel comfort. Flynn feels the same way, though he'd never say it.
"When I was a kid at the orphanage, I used to get these night terrors," begins Flynn. "I just remember the other kids telling me I talked in my sleep. They said it sounded like I was lost, and I was looking for something. Now that I look back on it, I guess it all made sense. That's how I felt living there… Lost."
Rapunzel stares through the glowing embers as she listens.
"I used to think to myself… 'this can't be it, can it?'" he continues in a soft voice, his mind drifting as he pokes at the wood with a stick. "The longer I stayed there, the more I realized I wanted more out of life. So, I left. Then the terrors went away… just like that."
Rapunzel has never heard the very feeling put into words so perfectly.
"When you said you felt like you didn't belong at the castle… I knew what you meant," reveals Flynn.
Suddenly, Rapunzel realizes that's why he changed his mind about staying with her. He could have left her that day, and Rapunzel could've let him. Instead, here they are, somehow finding solace in the mere presence of the other, despite their differences. Despite everything that had led them to this situation.
Rapunzel's nose is red, and her freckled cheeks are now a soft pink. Her head aches.
She hugs her knees tighter, burying her chin into them. "I didn't know that about you," she murmurs.
"Eh, there's a lot of things about me people don't know," Flynn shrugs as he peers over at her. His lips tug into an uneven grin, hoping he has lightened the atmosphere somewhat, but she doesn't say anything more.
Rapunzel isn't usually so quiet. Flynn notices it. Her voice isn't as cheerful as it always is, and her distant eyes hold sorrow rather than life.
She just looks so small and broken - sitting there, cold, with tears dry on her face and wrapped in her cloak like a scared little child.
Flynn perks up as an idea comes to mind. "By the way… this funny thing happened to me the other day." He leans away from her to dig through his satchel on the ground next to him. "You see, I found this lying around…" he pulls out Rapunzel's gold chain bracelet, "…and I thought it would be the decent thing for me to return it to its owner so… you're welcome."
Rapunzel glances at the jewelry dangling off his finger. At first, she doesn't recognize it. Then she recalls buying it the day she'd met him in the village, just for it to disappear from her wrist soon afterwards. That had been weeks ago. It feels like longer. She'd completely forgotten about it until now.
However, instead of taking it from him, she looks up at him challengingly. "How'd you know it was mine?" There's a teasing glint in her eye as she says it.
Flynn looks away hesitantly, "Uh…"
"I don't suppose your criminal record would have anything to do with it going missing, would it?" Rapunzel asks, a hint of a smirk reaching her lips.
"…Okay, maybe I did steal it. But the important thing here is that I gave it back, right?" There's a sense of accomplishment knowing that he'd made her smile. "And who knows, maybe I stole it specifically so that I would have an excuse to give it back to you."
Rapunzel blushes at that, chuckling softly. If she's honest, she doesn't much care about the bracelet anyway.
"Well then… thank you," Rapunzel smiles, deciding to go along with it. His ability to lie so easily is somehow amusing to her.
She shifts closer to him so Flynn can clasp it around her wrist. When he's finished, she sits back on her heels and stares down at it in awe.
When she looks up again, he's already looking at her. Rapunzel turns away awkwardly, another blush rising to her cheeks.
Flynn turns away too, and pretends not to notice.