Meg's hands shake so bad, she can barely see the dripping words on the paper that she clutches tightly in her hands. Looking over at Evan, she notices he stands there looking just as frozen as she does, and her heart sinks.
"J.O.," she mutters, not to Nea, but to Evan directly, suddenly everything making sense, "Jed Olsen…who is Jed Olsen, Evan?"
Evan remains still and silent, visions of the Trapper play in Meg's head as she looks at him standing there as straight as a board; his shoulders move up and down with his controlled breathing slowly yet he remains silent. But despite that, Meg knows there has to be a connection between everything, and she hopes that there is an explanation for this, something that makes sense.
"Jed Olsen? Who? Nevermind, you can tell me later. Meg, let's go," Nea interrupts, clearly frustrated at the situation and the silence that followed Meg's question. Nea grabs Meg's wrist and painfully yanks her towards the hotel entrance muttering to herself. "We don't have time for this."
"He's Ghostface," Evan says, his voice cuts through the rain and effectively makes both Meg and Nea stop walking. Meg's heart stops and her blood freezes as she stares straight ahead. She doesn't turn around right away, she doesn't even look at him, but she knows he takes a step closer to them as the heavy sound of his boots splash against the puddles on the ground. "I'm almost positive now, but I didn't know for sure when you asked me before."
"So…" Meg can't seem to find her voice but she presses on quietly, hoping that Evan can hear her over the sound of the rain. "You thought you knew it was him, and you still didn't tell me."
"Because I had no reason to worry you unnecessarily-"
"Unnecessarily?!" Meg whips around, pulling her arm from Nea, as she faces Evan. "But you thought-"
"You were so preoccupied with Jeffrey," Evan interrupts her, his voice a little louder as he takes a step towards her, "I wasn't going to tell you something I could have very well made up in my own mind. But now, I believe that it is him."
"Well why aren't you sure? If you know his name, you know his name!"
"Because I spent decades hearing him call himself Danny Johnson, not Jed Olsen, but I can faintly recall a time he mentioned a Jed Olsen, whether he was talking about himself or not, I don't know."
"Why didn't you tell me this sooner?" Meg yells, gesturing back to Nea, "We could have been here sooner, maybe even in time to help Claudette and yet…"
"I didn't want to give you another reason to go off looking for another murderer."
"Why? Why does it matter what I do? Why would you even care?" Meg asks, all the questions come fumbling from her mouth before she knows what she is asking.
Nea takes a step forward so that she is beside Meg and grabs her hand. Evan says nothing as he glances at their interlocked hands and then back to Meg.
"I wasn't going to send you off on a pointless search for something that I wasn't certain of. This is why I didn't want you to go alone," Evan replies, ignoring Meg's initial questions.
Meg swallows back tears as she looks at Evan trying to understand the feelings of both betrayal and something else…
Care?
She feel betrayed because again, Evan hid something from her that could have helped them in the long run, but at the same time, she knows it is almost foolish to think that he did it on purpose. He's right, she knows this, him telling her some vague information wouldn't have helped, especially with no evidence to support it. She was focused on finding the Clown, finding Jeffrey, and thoughts of who Jed Olsen was was pushed to the back of her mind as soon as they were done talking about him.
He clearly thought about Jed Olsen more than she did, and he wanted to try and keep her safe, even if it backfired and instead got one of her friends taken…
She inhales deep, blinking back tears before she nods, an acceptance that she understands in a weird way where he was coming from.
"Meg," Nea snaps, not hostile towards Meg, but more of a jolt, waking her up. "Look, I don't know what you think, but I don't believe a thing he says, and we need to go. He's full of bullshit."
Nea begins to drag Meg away who stumbles a bit at the sudden movement. Evan takes a step forward, not quite following them, but instead reaches out as if to catch Meg if she falls, and this makes Nea stops immediately.
"Oh, no you don't," Nea yells, whipping around and facing Evan. "Don't you dare come in with us. I'm taking Meg, you can fuck off."
"Nea-" Meg starts.
"No," Nea's spits, holding Meg's hand a little bit too tight, "No. Claudette is gone, Meg, have you lost your mind? I don't know what is going on here between you two," she gestures with her free hand between Meg and Evan, "And frankly, that is something we can talk about another time, but I want to get our friend back, not try to stand here and get deep with another killer!"
"And do you think I don't want to find her?" Meg yells, yanking her arm back forcefully from Nea's vice-like grip. "But I know Evan isn't included in this. He has been with me the whole time since we left yesterday."
"The whole time? Every second?"
A muscle in Meg's cheek twitches, wanting to say yes but hesitating. She did go for a run, but she knows Evan isn't responsible.
He can't be.
"For most of it, I was there. Nea, he's not the same person we always thought he was."
Meg takes this chance to glance over at Evan who still stands there emitting the threatening aura he always had in the trials. She got used to not seeing him like this, and right now, she just wants to go back to how things were when they were at the house, in their own world for the last twenty-four hours.
Everything has come crumbling down within the span of just a few minutes, and Meg's mind can hardly process it enough to keep up.
"He has been with me the whole time, I can vouch for him-"
"But what if he has something to do with it?"
"How would he even get in touch with them? He doesn't even know what a freakin cheese puff is or how to use a cell phone!" Meg laughs out the last part out of pure desperation for her friend to just believe her right now.
Nea is silent as she stares at Meg, processing what she is saying but refusing to believe it.
"Look, I wouldn't bring him here if I thought he was a danger to us or to me. Let's all go inside. We can all talk, civilly, on where to go from here."
Nea huffs like a boar ready to charge as she looks between Meg and Evan before turning around and letting out a sigh of frustration.
"Fine. But I swear if anything happens…"
"Nothing will," Meg tries to reassure her friend by taking her hand and giving it a small squeeze. "Trust me."
They walk around to the back of the hotel where Nea says they've been sneaking in and out of in order to avoid the front desk. Meg glances up at a security camera that is propped in the corner near the door and laughs because either the front desk doesn't care, or it's just there for decoration.
As soon as they're inside, a shiver runs through Meg due to the eerie silence in the hallways and the sudden dryness from being outside.
The three make their way to the room, leaving a trail of water behind them, and soon they are outside of room 113. Nea knocks on the door a couple of times before knocking again once, and Meg can only assume is to signal that it was actually her.
Evan takes a step closer behind Meg, and although she can almost feel him breathing down her neck behind her, she doesn't even react anymore, almost feeling like this is a normal reaction for him.
Shuffle closer to her whenever there is any sort of tension around.
Or really any time that he can be closer to her…
David opens up the door, and Meg doesn't even get a chance to breathe before he grabs Meg's wrist and tugs her inside.
"The fuck? Didn't expect you!" he says, giving her a hard pat on the back that echoed sharply due to the fact that her clothes were soaked from the rain. "Goddamn we were worried about ya."
Meg smiles and begins to say how good it is to be with them again but then David's whole demeanor changes as his eyes land on Evan, who takes a step closer to Meg and stares at David's hand on her back.
"And what the hell is he doing here?" he growls.
Meg hears Nea stifle a sarcastic laugh as she shoves past Meg and David, making her way to the dresser across the room, "I didn't want him here either."
"Look," Meg starts before David can say anything to argue, "Evan can be useful, especially to us now. He knows things we don't, and he knows these killers, at least a little bit," she begins explaining and as she talks, she is tempted to look at Evan, but decides against it as she keeps her eyes glued to David as she talks. "Plus, it doesn't hurt to have some more power on our side when it comes to finding Claudette."
David's eye twitches and he looks away for a moment when Meg mentions Claudette. He slowly lets go of her wrist and wipes his nose before scowling up at Evan.
"Killers? There are more?"
Meg swallows, not wanting to tell him about what just happened outside, but knowing that she has to in order to move forward.
"J.O...we think is Jed Olsen, who is Ghostface."
David immediately grabs Meg and pulls her behind him so that he is in between Evan and Meg, protecting her from the one person Meg knows she doesn't need to be protected from.
"If that's true, did you not stop to think about the possibility that they're working together? They all got off on killin' us all the damn time. What makes you think he's not a part of it?"
"David, come on, it's not like that. Evan isn't like that, just…" Meg hesitates as she moves beside David and gestures to Evan, beckoning him to come in so they can at least close the door and not have their fighting match for anyone to hear, especially since they're not supposed to be there to begin with. "I pretty much had to drag Evan here because I wanted to go look for the Clown. I think he is around too, along with Ghostface, and if what I think is true, Claudette is probably with him too."
"How could you even begin to know any of this?" Nea asks, coming out from the bathroom in changed clothes.
"When we left you guys the other day, I saw the news in the bar you two came from. They had a guy named Jed Olsen on, and there have been sightings of a clown in towns nearby as well as missing people and murders that started as soon as we all got out…who else would that be?"
"And why didn't you tell us this sooner?!" Nea practically shoves David out of the way to get to Meg in the tiny entry way. "Are you seriously saying you knew about this for a whole day and a half and are just now coming to us about it?"
"I didn't really think much of it then! How would he even find us here? We-"
"Well someone found us here! Claudette is gone, and you had information that could have helped us a lot sooner!"
Meg swallows, trying fight back bitter tears as she thinks back on the last twenty-four hours. Nea was right, they couldn't have been far, and she feels absolutely stupid for not telling them right then and there…
But no, she didn't even know it was the Clown, and she still doesn't. All she knows for sure is that Jed Olsen is here, and Jed Olsen has Claudette.
"Look, you're right, and I'm sorry," Meg starts before having to clear her throat to keep it from cracking, "But you can't blame me for not rushing back and getting you guys! I didn't know it was him, and truthfully…"
She hesitates not even sure what to say to justify anything…
She had this same argument with Evan just a few minutes ago, didn't she? When she was mad he didn't tell her about about Jed Olsen. She accused him of keeping things to himself, and yet here she is, keeping things between her and Evan for the sake of what?
Meg feels sick as she tries to keep herself from throwing up when she opens her mouth. "I should have told you guys," she looks back at her friends, trying her best to ignore the betrayed look on their faces, "I don't know what I was thinking, but I figured if I thought of something that could help, it would have been better than involving you two. I was wrong, but now we need to look at finding Claudette. That is what is important."
Nea rubs her arm and glances at David, who hasn't changed his absolute furious expression since seeing Evan, only now, the expression is directed at her.
"Look, we will step out. Meg, you can change into some drier clothes I have, I think we just have to talk for a moment," Nea says with no warmness in her voice. Without waiting for a confirmation from anyone, she grabs David's upper arm and pulls him outside into the hallway, shutting Evan and Meg in the hotel room alone, and although there aren't as many people in the room now, it couldn't feel more suffocating.
"I really messed everything up, didn't I?" Meg admits, staring at the scratched white door. She can only imagine what her friends are saying out there, and she is almost tempted to creep up to the door and try to listen, but she can't.
Not only would it be an invasion of privacy, and she respects her friends too much to do that, but she is also terrified at what they're saying. They wouldn't just abandon her now, would they?
Evan walks up behind Meg and says nothing as he brushes a few fingers through the ends of her hair as he takes the backpack off her back, finally relieving some of the pressure and exhaustion she already felt.
She pretends not to notice how he stood closer than he needed to reach the bag, or how he hesitated as his fingers laced through her hair for just a moment.
And most of all, she pretends that she didn't want it for more than just that second…
Anything to make her forget about what an absolute horrible friend she feels like she has been.
"I'm such a hypocrite," she admits, turning towards Evan. He still has the bag in his hand as he looks at her. "I should have told them when we saw the news the other day. I was so caught up in our own situation…"
Meg has to stop talking for a moment, trying not to get choked up as the realization hits her. "I shouldn't have been mad at you for not telling me right away, about Jed Olsen, or the papers, or anything…Everything has seemed so black and white to me for ages and I…" she trials off, not sure where she is going.
She wishes there were an easier way to deal with everything, deal with this, and all she wants is to move on, to survive, to get her friend's all in one place.
Feeling tears burn her eyes, she doesn't try to swallow them back anymore as she finally lets them loose, a dam bursting as she stands there, feeling so helpless, ashamed, and alone.
It is the first time she has cried, really cried since being out, and even before that, she doesn't even remember the last time she cried within the realm. Sure she had times, but lately, she felt more broken and beaten down than anything, she didn't even think she could cry if she wanted to, but now…
Now she couldn't even stop.
She tried, but that just lead to more ugly full on crying that she couldn't control. Despite how she feels, within just a couple seconds of her crying, she feels strong arms wrap around her as Evan pulls her close to his chest.
Not quite understanding the intimacy that she should feel, she cries into his chest, letting all the pain and tears and overwhelming madness from the last few days seep out of her until a few minutes pass, and her sobbing quiets down into brief sniffling. Her hot tears feel cold against Evan's wet shirt, and as the minutes drag on, she begins to listen to his heart beat.
Strong, steady, secure.
It helps calm her down to the point of being almost embarrassed at her outburst, especially when she realizes that she is still in his arms, being held like a child, and so she reluctantly decides to pull away from the warmth he provided.
As she pulls away, his hands linger on her arms for a moment as he looks her right in her eyes, his stare permeating any defense she tries to put up after what she thinks was an embarrassing display of emotions.
"We are all trying to get by. We are all struggling, and you are doing what you can," he says, giving her arms a soft squeeze before pulling away completely, letting his arms fall once more by his sides.
She almost wants the comfort back, wants his body warmth back, and that is when she realizes how cold she really is, and how they have been standing there in their wet clothes for minutes now, when they could be getting dry.
Before she reaches back for the bag, she smiles at him.
"I'm sorry for being horrible about Jed Olsen, I realize now how maybe it is hard to know the right time to tell someone something…I just…I didn't think about it."
The side of Evan's mouth twitches into a smile that disappears just as quickly as he opens the wet bag, pulling out their clothes that laid on top of the pile.
"You have done nothing that you need to apologize to me for. I understand completely," he says, but there is something sharp in his voice. It makes Meg realize that something has changed, truly changed between them, and she can't say she doesn't hate how she might understand him a little bit better now.
Evan hands her the damp clothes he picked out for her from the bag, changing the subject before Meg can say anything more. "They're a little bit wet, but at least they're not soaked," he observes, pulling out his clothes and finally setting the bag down on the linoleum by the doorway.
Meg notices that he doesn't say anything more, and as much as she wants to apologize, wants him to know how awful she feels, she doesn't push it, so she nods, takes her clothes, and steps into the bathroom to change.
As soon as the door closes, she lets out a long exhale, letting all the air and grief and pain from the last few minutes out of her body as she looks at herself in the mirror.
Her eyes are red and swollen from the crying, and she can't ignore the bags under her eyes that she begins to think will never go away. She feels like she will always be exhausted, always be fighting…
Looking at herself, she resembles a feral wet cat more than anything as her hair sticks to her head and her clothes hang uncomfortably from her body. Despite her outburst, she still can't quiet the absolute frustration in her mind about not telling her friend's sooner about her discoveries about the Clown and Jed Olsen, and she almost wants to break the mirror in front of her out of pure red hot anger that explodes from her chest, that is until Evan's words echo in her mind.
"We are all trying."
He is right, she thinks…there was no guide, no handbook to how they should be living. No one should have to live like they did, and then expect to come out completely unscathed…
She tries to tell herself this as she takes deep breaths in and out, trying to calm herself down before she decides to change.
Grasping the clothes Evan packed for her, she sees that the outfit is just another pair of black pants and an emerald green button-up. It is pretty much the same outfit she had before, except significantly less wet.
For a moment, she is tempted to go out and find something that was completely dry that was Nea's, but something in her stops herself.
She kind of likes being in these clothes.
Not wanting to think of the reason behind it, she clears her throat and rubs the last few dried tears from her eyes as she changes into the drier clothes before she walks out of the bathroom.
The first thing she sees is Evan, still changing as his back is turned to her, and Meg can't help but take in a sharp inhale as she looks at him.
His back is muscular, like the rest of him, but it is riddled with deep angry white scars that look painful enough alone, but they also seem to stretch uncomfortably as he moves. She also notices deep red scars along his arms and along his shoulders from where the metal used to be protruding horrifically from his body, and although the deformities aren't there, she can picture them just as clear, making her look away.
She doesn't remember him having any metal where those white scars along his back were though…
Was that something else? Maybe from the Entity? Or before?
She tries not to think of it long until Evan turns around and she hears him clear his throat, an indication that he was done.
Turning to face him, she almost mentions the scars, but decides against it, and just as she is about to open her mouth again, the door to the room opens as Nea and David come back inside.
David marches towards Evan, but instead of stopping and saying anything to him, he walks past and takes a seat in one of two armchairs that sit in the corner of the room. Meg walks closer to Evan and takes a seat on the bed, as Nea takes a seat beside Meg.
Meg's stomach is in knots as she looks between David and Nea, waiting for them to say something.
"So, we decided that he can stay," Nea says to Meg, not even looking in Evan's direction.
Meg has to bite her tongue as she wants to say that Evan was coming with them whether they wanted him there or not.
He is a powerful ally they need to have, and within the span of just a few hours, she knows how essential it is that he is there with them.
But Meg nods anyways, wanting to move on.
"I still don't trust you, and I swear if you make one wrong move, I will kill you myself," David growls at Evan, who looks as unimpressed as ever as he stares back.
"David-" Meg tries to say only to be interrupted by Evan.
"We both know if you try to kill me, I'm not the one who will end up dead."
"Listen here, you fuckin' piece of shit," David yells, pushing himself up from the chair, "If anything happens to Claudette, or any of us, I won't be the only one wanting to kill you."
"Be that as it may, I don't think threatening me will do you any favors right now."
David takes a step towards Evan but before he can get anywhere, Meg jumps up from the bed and goes in between the two men.
"Will you two just stop?" Meg hisses, trying not to raise her voice. "You don't like each other, that's fine, we get it. But David, we need Evan right now, and Evan…just don't get him riled up."
The two men stare at each other, David shooting daggers and Evan breathing slowly, but Meg has been around Evan enough to know that it is taking everything in him not to attack David right then and there.
She has been on the other side of Evan's fiery stare before, and she knows exactly what he wants to say, and she is thankful that for whatever reason, he remains quiet.
"Can we just get to talking about what we are actually going to do?" Nea interjects. David visibly relaxes and with one last glare at Evan, he takes a seat back in the armchair, and Evan goes to the opposite wall and leans against it, crossing his arms.
Meg takes a seat back next to Nea on the bed and before she speaks, Nea grabs her hand, making Meg choke up a little bit. Scared that she had ruined anything she had with her best friends, a wave of relief rushes over her when Nea gives her hand a squeeze and resumes talking.
"So we know that Jed Olsen is Ghostface, and he has Claudette, and we think that the Clown is somewhere around here too. So where do we go from here?"
"We could start in the town where he said the Clown was," Meg suggests. "It could have been a sign, him somehow getting on the news and telling about the Clown. It is clear they're working together, right?"
The two men don't say anything but Nea frowns, looking at the ground.
"But it feels all too convenient. Why would he want us to go and find them?"
"Could be a trap," David mumbles, looking outside at the sky before leaning forward, resting his elbows on his knees.
"But we have to at least try to save Claudette. Even if it is a trap, we can't just leave her out there with them," Meg says. She looks at Evan who is already staring at her and it makes her stomach churn for some reason she can't place, so she looks away, but she knows he still looks at her.
"Well, he was here in town. Do you think he's still here with her? What if sending us looking for the Clown is his way of getting rid of us for whatever reason?"
"Well earlier today, I think I saw something in the woods," Meg starts saying, wanting to make sure she tells them everything she knows now. She rubs her arm and isn't quite able to look at any of the eyes that are now glued to her. "I went for a run this morning, it was pretty early, and I thought someone was following me so I ran back."
"Well did you actually see anything? Or was it just a shadow?" Nea asks, placing a hand on Meg's knee, giving it a reassuring squeeze.
"No, well, maybe. I got back to the house and when I turned around, I thought I saw…something…but when I really looked nothing was there. It was probably my imagination," Meg continues, waving her hand vaguely in the air as though waving her thoughts away.
Evan stares at Meg, as the three survivors glance at each other.
"Do you think it was him?" Nea finally says as the awkward silence hangs over the group.
Meg shrugs, not fully convinced it was or wasn't.
"I don't know."
"So, what if Claudette is in those woods and we go adventuring off somewhere else leaving her to him?" Nea argues adjusting her body so she is facing more towards Meg.
"But they could be working together. He could have been trying to grab me too for whatever reason," Meg pauses, trying to gather her thoughts about the whole situation.
"It could have been a distraction," Evan chimes in for the first time since Nea and David came back in the room. All three of them snap their attention towards him as he looks at the ground, not making any eye contact with them right away. "Not that I would want to give him or Jeffrey any sort of compliment, but that being said, neither of them are stupid. Danny Johnson knows what he's doing, as does Jeffrey, and if he was in the forest around the Estate, he knows you would catch him there."
"So why didn't he just come out and tell Meg that he was there, or take her himself?" Nea asks, looking at Meg almost in refusal to look at Evan himself.
"I believe he beckoned you to follow him in that note, did he not? He made himself known, or rather suspected, to Meg earlier so you three would want to look around the Estate first, and perhaps he could have more time with your friend elsewhere."
No one knows what to say, as Meg's mouth hangs open, shocked at the admission from Evan. Looking from Nea to David, she knows they must feel the same way she does.
Shocked at the brief glimpse into the personality of two other killers, as well as Evan speaking up in general. At first, Meg thinks about what Evan says, but as she looks at her friends, she doesn't see them considering what he said as much as she does. They scowl at him, then at each other before they look back to Meg.
Before they can say anything, Meg takes the initiative to break the silence. "I can believe that," she says, shrugging to her friends. "He probably wants us to find him, there's no doubt about it, but what if he is trying to lead us off for a bit?"
"But if he's in those woods, what makes you think he's anywhere else now? Why would he want to lead us off his trail when he literally told us to find him?" Nea snaps, crossing her arms as she now looks directly at Evan, challenging him.
He finally looks elsewhere that isn't the ground or at Meg as he looks at Nea and takes a deep breath.
"As I said, I don't know for sure. But that is just my assumption. I don't know much about them, but I know that they would want this to be a game."
"I don't think-"
"Then don't believe me," Evan interrupts Nea, cutting her off completely with his deep voice. "It isn't my friend that was taken by them. I'm only here because I was asked to be here."
A blush creeps onto Meg's face as she tries not to look at her friends after what Evan said. Yes, she asked him to be here, but he didn't have to blurt it out like that.
"I agree with him," Meg says, clearing her throat as she looks back at Evan, ignoring the stares from her friends. "He would know better than we would, and I think we should go with our original plan."
Evan nods, the movement so microscopic, she hardly registers it as a nod, and that's when she knows the nod was just for her.
"Fine. But if we find nothing, I'm not resting until we find her," Nea says, pushing herself up roughly from the bed, and gathering up some bottles of water they have in their mini fridge.
"Ay, you lot better be prepared for the next few days if we don't find Claud," David responds, staring straight at Meg as though he would have to convince her out of anyone to try and find Claudette.
"You don't have to convince me, I want to find her. I just think we should be smart and honestly, I think this is the best way to go."
Nea grabs a small bag from the closet and throws water and clothes into it before coming back over to Meg. She takes her hand and squeezes it so tight, her fingers start to tingle from losing feeling. They all stand in silence for a moment before almost collectively taking a deep breath in, getting ready to set out on their journey.
After a brief discussion on where to go and how to get there, the trio discovers that Chimacum Washington is central to the places that there were reports, and Egg & I road, the same road Jed Olsen said in his interview, is in Chimacum.
They would need to take a ferry boat over a body of water, and then another bus or taxi to the road, and after some debate, they decide on a taxi to the ferry, then a bus to the small town. A taxi wouldn't take them all the way across, nor would a bus, and this was their cheapest option.
David and Nea walk out of the hotel first, barely waiting for Meg and Evan to gather their still wet clothes and stuff them back into their bag, just in case.
"Do you really think this is the best idea?" Meg asks, taking out the donuts from their bag so she can shove in the old clothes before squishing those.
"I do."
Those two words had more conviction behind them than Meg has ever heard come from Evan, and in that moment, a sense of security washes over her as she glances up at him. He stands there, looking assured of himself, as he watches Meg take their clothes and fold them before putting them inside the bag.
She almost says she trusts him, but bites her tongue and instead she just nods and closes the bag shut before slinging it back on her back.
"Well let's go then."
As they walk outside, Meg notices it isn't raining anymore, which she is thankful for. Nea already took the initiative and called a taxi company who said they'd send one over in just a few minutes; they just had to be ready outside.
So the four of them stand side-by-side, with Meg not knowing what to say to her friends in those moments as they all looked around, suddenly very unsure of their plan. Nea rests a hand on Meg's arm and gives her an uneasy look, clearly trying to be supportive, but also looking just as nervous as ever.
"I know," Meg whispers to her, grabbing her hand and giving it a small squeeze before Nea takes a deep breath and goes to stand by David who stands apart from their group.
She doesn't blame them, of course, with how they stand a part from her and Evan, and she doesn't blame them for eyeing him with complete and utter disdain and fear, but she hopes that the more she stands beside him, maybe they can realize he isn't going to hurt them, even if it will take them more time to come around.
So she glances between Evan and her friends, even though the only thing that comes to the front of her mind right now is wanting to find Claudette, and hoping that agreeing with Evan wasn't the biggest mistake of her life.
The taxi comes, and the three survivors clamor into the backseat, while Evan awkwardly gets in front with the driver with a thick New York accent, even though he claims he was born there in Seattle.
As soon as the car begins moving from the curb, even from the back seat, Meg notices how Evan grips his seat so tight, his knuckles turn white, as he frantically looks around at the passing scenery with wide eyes. She occasionally makes eye contact when he glances backwards but he quickly looks away as something else catches his eye.
Soon Evan's complexion turns a sickly shade of green and she almost asks the driver to pull over, but as she is about to ask, the pungent smell of seawater and fish permeates the car despite the windows being closed, and she looks to her left, seeing them drive closer to a vast body of water.
The driver slows down and pulls up beside a glass building on the beach that leads to a ramp where Meg can assume the ferry will pull into.
Evan, despite trying his best to undo his seatbelt without shaking too much, fumbles for the door handle and practically spills out onto the street as soon as the car is stopped completely.
"I…what…how fast were we going? How is that even possible?" He stutters, his face still a shade of green as he frowns at the yellow taxi. "That can't even be safe!"
Meg laughs, which causes his scowl to deepen.
"I'm serious."
"I know you are," she replies through fits of giggles. "Cars are surprisingly safe. Our driver wasn't even going the speed limit half of the time. He could have gone way faster."
"How?!"
"The speed limit was fifty, he was going forty most of the way down that last road."
"Fifty?! Fifty what?! What does that even mean…" Evan peels his eyes from Meg as he watches the taxi pull away and turn the corner, mixing once more into the afternoon traffic.
Meg laughs again, covering her mouth as Evan's sour expression turns to her.
"No, no I'm not laughing at you…I'm not…" she tries to say in between fits of giggles that overcome her.
"That was horrifying! Human beings were not made to be in something that goes that fast…I don't understand…"
Meg smiles at him as she starts to nod only to appease him and make him feel better as he doubles over and takes a deep breath in.
"Well, at least you'll have a break until we have to get onto a bus on the other side," Meg says, giving his back a soft pat.
He shoots up and stares at her with wide eyes, "We have to get in something like that again?"
"What did you think a bus was?"
"The buses and trolleys we had didn't go that fast!"
"Okay…okay," Meg smiles. "You're right. But hey, just try to enjoy the boat ride next, okay? Here, let's go buy tickets before the ferry leaves without us."
Evan mutters something beside her, as she rolls her eyes and begins to walk towards the ferry terminal. Before opening the door, she turns towards the beach and takes a moment, a sense of nostalgia overcoming her.
She never thought she would see a beach again, or if ever.
Growing up in Montana, there weren't many opportunities for her to see open water like this, and honestly, it takes her breath away as her eyes scan the magnificent now blue water as the sky cleared up on their drive over.
There are groups of families clumped together along the beach, as most of the kids play in the sand, and about an handful of them splash around in the water. Meg shivers, thinking it is still too cold to be in the frigid water, but she remembers when she was a kid, and she thinks she would probably have gone in too.
Couples walk hand in hand along the beach, enjoying the temperate weather, and in the distance she thinks she can see the stark white ferry coming slowly towards them. Knowing they have a few minutes before the ferry gets there, a thought enters Meg's mind, and she almost grabs at Evan's arm, wanting to pull him towards the beach for a moment, just to get a feel of the sand, but she refrains, as she looks between her friends, Evan, and the ferry terminal.
She walks ahead, going inside the glass building. After a brief discussion on who should talk to the clerk to buy tickets, Meg takes the lead, buying them four walk-on passenger tickets. It takes a few minutes of walking to get to the top of the ramp that leads onto the ferry itself, and Meg enjoys herself by looking in both directions at the beach and the gentle crash of the waves on the sand.
As they get to the top, it is muggy and hot as the sun beats down on them within the glass walls, but after what seems like just a few minutes, the ferry docks and begins letting passengers off.
Patiently waiting their turn, Meg stares off into the water as Evan takes a seat next to her on the small bench, as Nea and David pace around in front of her, occasionally bumping into the people trying to leave.
"Will you guys sit and calm down?" Meg says after Nea almost bumps into a man with a suitcase who looks just as lost and flustered as they probably feel.
"No, these people need to hurry the fuck up so we can get on."
"Yeah, taking their sweet ass time…"
Meg rolls her eyes and waits until a loud chime happens overhead and a loud female automated voice comes on the loudspeaker telling them that they can board.
Nea and David rush on board, fast walking their way up to the front of the ferry, Meg and Evan following in their footsteps.
Meg can't help but be a little curious about what the front of the ferry looks like, and she is as excited as they are to get outside once more, feeling more like a cooped up child than anything.
They get outside, and notice some other passengers have the same excitement they have. Meg sees tourists taking pictures of one another, smiling in sunglasses, and trying to get the majestic mountains Meg sees in the background of their pictures.
Mountains line the horizon, and she sees a giant mountain that she assumes to be Mount Rainier, clear in the distance from here.
Pulling out her phone, she quickly snaps a low-quality picture of the horizon, hoping that maybe it'll turn out as beautiful as it looks now, but when she looks at the picture afterwards, it only looks sad and unimpressive, so she sighs, and stares at the sight hoping to commit it to memory. It really makes her miss the mountains back in her home town.
A deafening horn blares over the water as the ferry begins to move, and almost falling over at the sudden movement, Meg decides to go sit down in a patch of chairs that line the side of the boat. She already sees that Evan made himself comfortable in one of the chairs, so she decides to join him, taking the seat beside him.
He says nothing as she sits down, looking out at the blue waves as she feels the rush of cold air on her face.
Her chest swells with excitement, never thinking she would ever feel things like this ever again.
Taking a moment, she gazes over at her friends at the front of the boat. David is standing there, a shifty look in his eyes that seems to be there permanently now, but also seems so out of place for him pretending not to enjoy the rush of the breeze here.
Beside him, Nea practically hangs over the railing, excitedly looking between the waves and the sky. David says something that makes Nea frown and go over and smack him on the arm until he laughs, and she just goes back to the railing, starting up her freeing stance once more.
"You can go with them, you know," Evan says over the wind in Meg's ear, speaking up for the first time since they got on the boat. He lifts his chin up, gesturing over to them before looking out across the water. "You don't need to stay by me here. I think we are safe on this boat."
"I see, just because my friends are here, you're trying to get rid of me," Meg laughs beside him.
He blows out a puff of air from his nose and shakes his head. "I don't think I could even if I tried."
"And what's that supposed to mean?"
"You keep coming back," Evan says, raising an eyebrow and turning to look at her. His body relaxes and he sits back in the hard plastic chair as he raises his hand again and gestures over to Nea and David. "But you've been wanting to see them and be with them for awhile now, I'm sure. I'm fine here."
"But I like…" Meg pauses, stopping herself before she realizes what she is saying. She almost admits that she likes to spend time with him, and that she wants to stay there with him, but as she looks over at her friends, she knows that is where she should be…
Right?
But something in her presses her to say the one thing she doesn't mean to say.
"I like being here with you."
She feels her face turn red, and she can't seem to look at him, so she stares out at the blue water.
She squints her eyes, it almost being too bright and sunny for her to see properly and comfortably, but then again, nothing about this ferry ride is comfortable.
Evan remains silent beside her for a few beats until he replies, his voice soft, "I enjoy you being here, too."
They don't look at each other, but she can almost feel him relax even more beside her, melting into the chair as they watch the waves crash against the ferry.
About ten minutes pass in silence as the soothing sound of the waves and the sharp sting of the wind whips at her face, and she thinks she could really start to enjoy this ride before a loud chime rings through the ferry boat and an automated female voice echoes across the water.
We are now arriving at our destination. Drivers, please make your way back to your vehicles. Walk-on passengers please proceed to the front deck. Everyone must disembark the vessel at this time. Thank you for riding the Washington State Ferries.
Meg looks around and sees the loading dock closing in, so she doesn't move, knowing they are at the front of the boat.
This side of the water looks much different from the other side, and she doesn't quite know how to feel.
This town, Kingston, is small, or at least the part she sees is. From the vantage point of the ferry, she sees the loading area, as well as a significant portion to what she could consider downtown. There are small, quaint buildings lining a street that leads to and from the ferry, and she wonders what more there is when the road curves that she can't see.
She tries to focus on the town itself, that reminds her of home, instead of thinking about how this could have been a huge mistake, and now knowing how long it takes to travel by ferry, she realizes it really would screw up everything if Ghostface was back in Issaquah…
So as she looks at all of her friends, she silently prays to a god she doesn't quite believe in anymore that they are making the right choice by being here to look for Claudette.
She doesn't even care about Jeffrey, the Clown anymore…
She just wants to make sure her friend is okay.
After a few minutes, Evan ushers her up out of her seat, as the four join a group of walk-on passengers and walk down a long winding ramp to the ground.
"Now what?" David asks, as they find themselves between a coffee stand and a small crepe shop, looking each direction trying to find out where to go.
Meg scowls and doesn't say much as she tries to use the internet function on her phone to navigate the strange bus schedules she finds online.
It takes a team effort as Meg tries to read it, and thinks that the next bus isn't coming for another five hours, before Nea takes over and thinks that the next one is in fifteen minutes. David doesn't believe either of them as he takes a look and he thinks that the next one is in two hours and before they even ask, Meg looks at Evan who stares off into the distance, so they decide to skip his input.
No matter how much time they think will pass before the next bus will get there, they all somehow found the right bus that will take them to their destination, so instead of arguing on what to do, they decide to go to the bus stop and wait for as long as it takes.
Meg digs around in her pockets for the smaller change she put in there from the change from the ferry as she divvies it out amongst her friends and Evan. She also remembers the cell phones she bought for them, and hands those to her now excited friends.
The bus arrives shortly after, and they take their seats, Nea and David sitting in one row, eager to begin looking at their new phones, as Meg and Evan sit across from them, like always.
Not that Meg minds, and she doesn't think either one of her friends would want to sit with Evan, so she sits next to him happily as he leans slightly towards the middle of the seats, taking up more space than the average human being due to his size. Meg tries to shuffle more towards the window to accommodate him, but it doesn't make much of a difference as she feels his leg press against hers and his arm against her shoulder.
She swallows, not trying to make it seem like it is any weirder than one of her friend's sitting beside her, but this is the most contact she has had with him yet, or at least the most prolonged.
She can feel every twitch and every tense of his muscles beneath his clothes, so she looks outside, trying her best to ignore the fact that they are so close to each other, as she crosses her arms and stares at the scenery that grows darker with their journey.
Every now and then, she feels his hand brush against her thigh and she tries to tell herself that it is only him adjusting how he's sitting, nothing else.
But she can't stop the nerves that feel like they are on fire every time he touches her, so she stares outside, trying to focus on where they're going.
"I still don't understand how anyone can be inside something that goes this fast," Evan mumbles beside Meg about halfway into their bus trip.
She smiles and glances up at him through the corner of her eye, trying not to laugh at the way he can take the most generic things and somehow make a huge deal about it.
Flashbacks from the price of cheese comes to her mind which makes her actually laugh beside Evan, and if she didn't know any better, she could swear she feels him push his leg just a little bit more towards hers after that.
The rest of the ride is in silence, the dull hum of the engine being the only thing Meg allows herself to concentrate on.
It's fully dark by the time they arrive at the bus stop in the small town of Chimacum, Washington. The four very odd looking group step off of the empty bus and watch it slowly pull away, driving through a stop sign and disappearing around a corner.
For a moment, it feels like they are frozen, each and every one of them taking in the scene around them, wondering where to go from here, and what they are possibly doing.
"The GPS said it is about a twenty minute walk to the road that Jed Olsen talked about," Meg decides to say, breaking the very tense silence that settles over them the longer they stand there. "It's just down the main road, back where we came from and then to the right."
Silence passes between the four as they study their surroundings before making a clear decision to start walking.
The bus stop is at a small gas station with a closed down sad looking coffee stand in the parking lot. It's late, too late for it to be open, so there are no lights on from it or the gas station itself.
In the near distance she can see the words 'Chimacum Cafe' illuminated in a flickering red neon sign, but other than that, everything around them is dark and bare with no sign of life anywhere.
There is no traffic, and the only sound that fills their ears comes from the four-way stop they are beside as a small flashing red stoplight hangs above the signs, flashing red and casting an eerie glow over them every other second.
"Well let's start walkin'," David mumbles, already walking in a random direction before Meg has to correct him and tell him to walk to his left, not right.
Unconsciously, they separate into their two groups, as it was this whole trip, with Nea and David leading them, and Meg and Evan hanging back a few paces.
As they walk, the sidewalk narrows and eventually disappears into a small dirt path along the side of the road lined with dense forest on one side, and farmland on the other.
They turn on their flashlights from their phones after they walk a little ways from the small town they were at, not realizing that where they were walking to had absolutely no streetlights along the road, nor was there a lot of traffic to light their way.
It was virtually silent, which Meg both loved and hated, each emotion building inside her as they walk.
She loves listening to the distant chirp of crickets and the sound of frogs along their path and it almost makes this whole trip worth it. The gentle breeze that flows around them helps ease her anxiety along with listening to her friends talk in front of her.
Meg wasn't sure what she expected, but she definitely didn't expect this road to be in the middle of nowhere, and as the minutes pass and the road gets darker as the moon rises, she wonders if they made the right choice.
She hopes they made the right choice.
It was her idea to drag them out here, after all, and could she even live with herself if something were to happen to them because of a wild idea she had?
What if Claudette isn't even here?
She closes her eyes for a brief second, trying not to think about that possibility, but she manages to get her foot stuck on a small root that sticks out of the ground.
Stumbling forward slightly, she feels one of Evan's strong hands wrap around her wrist and the other rests at the small of her back, trying to make sure she doesn't fall.
"Careful," he says, and although it takes a second for Meg to turn around and thank him, she shoots him a relieved smile, thanking him for catching her.
He hesitates a few beats before letting go of her wrist, but his hand lingers just a moment longer on her back before he lets that fall and nods forward at David and Nea that somehow didn't hear what just happened as they kept walking.
Meg resumes walking, her eyes glued to the ground now, not wanting to trip again, and although she is now being careful, she notices Evan walking more to her side and closer to her, like he could prevent another small stumble.
A strange feeling bubbles in Meg's chest that she ignores, or tries to ignore, as she glances up at Evan's dark frame illuminated by the moonlight behind him.
He looks down at her, an odd expression on his face before he looks back up, concentrating on the road in front of them.
"Evan," Meg starts, moving slightly over so they can walk side-by-side, and although the path is small, they make it work even if they are practically touching and their hands and arms graze each other as they walk.
He looks back at her with an eyebrow raised, as to say, go on.
"What if we made the wrong choice?" Meg says, the anxieties of this trip are suddenly too much the farther they get, and she doesn't want to bother Nea or David with them, not after everything she has put them through today, so it seems like Evan is the next best choice. "I want to find the Clown, I think, and I definitely want to find Claudette, but…being here…" she pauses, not wanting to finish her sentence.
"I did warn you about this trip this morning," Evan says outright. His voice is flat, and he lets out a long exhale before continuing, "But I know how important this is to you. We will be fine. We are as prepared as we can be. I know we need to find your friend, and this is the first step."
Meg swallows as she gives him a small smile, thankful to have him there beside her, even if Nea and David don't agree.
They can come around, and they definitely haven't seen the sides of him that she has seen, and she just hopes that they can get the chance to see him for who he is now, rather than who he was before.
Not that she can forget it, and she doesn't expect them to, but she is learning more about who Evan MacMillan is, and she can't say she hates who is beside her.
Not one bit, even despite his stubborn, old-fashioned, crotchety self.
"Promise me something," Meg blurts out, the words fumbling from her mouth. Evan doesn't say anything and she almost expects him to say something sarcastic, but instead, he nods. "Just…if things go bad, if we find the Clown - no - Jeffrey, I mean, or Jed Olsen, just…please make sure my friend's don't die."
She looks ahead at Nea who is saying something to David, and the two of them laugh quietly, and she misses a time where she would normally be a part of that, and now it seems like she chose a side when she didn't know there were sides to choose.
But regardless, she wants them to be safe, needs them to be safe.
"No matter what happens to me, just make sure they're okay. I…I feel like I dragged you all into this and I don't know what I would do if something happened to them and I knew it was my fault that they were here to begin with…"
Meg's voice cracks, effectively ending her small speech.
Before she can even begin to talk again, Evan responds, "I won't let anything happen to you."
"That's not what I - "
"I know what you asked."
Meg doesn't try to argue any more, and although she is comforted by the fact that Evan is so insistent on protecting her, she still feels like she is walking with her stomach full of lead.
After everything today, she can't lose Nea and David too, and the thought of Claudette being lost, and potentially not even being here is enough to make Meg want to throw up right there on the side of the road, but she pushes on, knowing that her feelings aren't what is most important right now.
She swallows the bitter saliva that gathers in the back corners of her mouth and walks on, eyes scanning the darkness for any signs of…anything.
Meg and Evan walk in silence for a few minutes, as Nea and David quietly talk in front of them. It's too quiet for Meg to make out any of their words, but she doesn't mind right now, content in the silence and the calmness that Evan's presence brings her.
After awhile, the moon is now high in the sky like a spotlight, shining down on them as though they are about to be a part of some twisted show, one that Meg never agreed to be on.
It reminds her of the trials, the moon always feeling like a mocking vision of being in the spotlight, a never-ending play that she can't seem to get out of. As she walks, these feelings grow until she begins to sweat despite it being cold out, and her knees shake from nerves.
Slowing down, she clutches at her chest, trying to calm her racing heart. Even though she knows she isn't in a trial, her body reacts as though there is danger just around the corner, and for once, she can't tell herself that there isn't.
Her mind races and her heart pumps like she is running a marathon. Her lungs constrict and she can almost hear the buzzing of distant generators and screams and knife against skin and bone...
"Meg?" Her name pulls her out, only this time it isn't Nea or David saying her name, it is Evan, and Meg can hardly see anything as his huge frame steps in front of her until he is all that she sees. "Meg, what's wrong?"
Her name coming from Evan's mouth still sounds unnatural, but she clings to it as she stares at him, trying to breathe and grounding herself to the fact that she isn't in any danger right now, at least not yet.
Staring into Evan's eyes, even in the harsh darkness, she can see his eyes meet hers. He is stable, calm, collected…a lifeboat in the middle of the ocean and she stares at him listening to his steady breathing for everything she is worth.
Eventually after what seems like hours, even though Meg knows it was probably at most thirty seconds, she begins to regain control of her mind.
Her heart begins to slow until she can't feel it anymore, and her breathing returns to normal, matching Evan's steady rise and fall of his chest until that is the only thing she can concentrate on in that moment.
"Are you okay?" He asks, his voice barely above a whisper.
Meg nods slowly as she straightens her back, standing upright again.
"Yeah, I'm fine," she finally replies, not sure whether to take a step back or a step forward, so she stays put for now, before she repeats herself, a little more assured this time. "I'm fine."
Evan's brow furrows as he looks at her yet he says nothing. Nodding, he takes a step to the side to let her pass him so he's behind her as they walk.
Meg notices that Nea and David are a lot farther away than they were before, clearly not noticing Meg's panic episode, not that she cares.
She feels oddly comforted by the fact that they didn't see her like that, but then a thought hits her so fast, her breath hitches for a moment before she shoves it aside.
Her friend's should be the ones she should count on to help her through those episodes, not Evan…
She gives Evan an uneasy smile as she wipes her sweaty palms against her pants.
"Thanks for that…I mean…I don't know what came over me but…" she glances back at her friends to see if they are looking.
They aren't.
So she continues.
"I'm glad you're here," she mutters, looking up at him. He stiffens slightly and she notices muscles in his neck tense up for just a second, before relaxing once again. She doesn't want to push anything, or make anything weird between them, but she is glad that they have each other in their own twisted way. Although they still know virtually next to nothing about each other, she can hardly believe how close she feels with Evan right now, and as much as she wants to say that it is just because they have become acquaintances, she knows she is lying to herself, and that terrifies her more than anything.
She's just not ready to admit anything yet, so she shoves those thoughts down for another time, another place.
"I am too," Evan says, catching Meg off guard with his response to her broken up thoughts. But she smiles and begins walking again, a little faster this time in order to catch up to Nea and David.
Soon, they reach a curve in the road, and when they get to the other side, they see a reflective green street sign glowing in the moonlight ahead of them, and a street to their right that cuts through the farmland and into more trees on the other side.
A sort of heaviness settles through the group as they walk, all of them trying their best to ignore it and continue like they were just a minute ago.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" Evan asks behind Meg, and as much as she immediately wants to whip around and tell him yes, she doesn't. She doesn't even respond as she continues walking, not sure what on Earth she could possibly say at this moment, not wanting to move forward, but knowing she can't stop.
"We can always come back when you're more able to handle this."
"I can handle this," Meg hisses, still facing forward.
"Well earlier-"
"I don't care about earlier!"
And suddenly all the irony of yesterday comes flooding into her mind, thinking their positions have only reversed. Yesterday, while Evan found out blowing information and set out into the real world for food, Meg constantly was trying to make sure he was okay only to be met with him snapping at her and today…Meg feels like their roles have truly been reversed.
She could argue her panic that jolts through her with every heartbeat, every step, every breath, is worse, but this isn't a competition.
And she can only laugh to herself thinking that now here he is, acting as the voice of reason, after everything.
"I'm fine," she repeats. "We have to do this, and we have to see if Claudette is here at least. If we don't find Jeffrey, then fine, we can head back, but we have to try…"
Meg's voice falters as they reach the sign.
Egg & I Road.
The same road Jed Olsen talked about in the news show, and Meg can hardly believe she is standing in this spot with only three other people, and just a few knives as weapons.
Although she knows, or at least she hopes, that there are only a maximum of two other people they would need to fight here on the other side, it feels like they are going to war and they are terribly outnumbered.
As the four of them regroup, Meg tries to give a reassuring nod, but as she looks from her friends' faces, to Evan, the nerves she feels make her knees shake once again.
"You guys ready for this?" Nea says, her voice brash but the conviction behind it wavers. Immediately, Meg knows she has to be as scared as she is.
"I'm always ready to kill some shitheads," David responds, punching a fist into his other palm in an almost comical fashion.
"We are here for Claudette," Meg contributes, "And I guess to kill them if the timing is right."
"That's my girl," David says, punching Meg on the arm with a smile. David always seemed rejuvenated when he had the chance to fight, and now is no exception.
Nea smiles along with them and nods. "We can do this."
"We've been through worse," David adds.
Meg agrees.
Yes they have.
They can handle this.
Meg almost waits for Evan to say something, but she knows he won't, not in front of her friends anyway.
"Well let's go," Meg says, ushering them forward down the dark road illuminated only by the moonlight and their cheap cell phone flashlights.
The road before them cuts between some farm land but there aren't any animals out right now, so Meg only looks at the seemingly ever expanding land before them with bales of hay set out randomly.
She focuses on this because she is terrified to look straight ahead at where the road goes, knowing it can only lead to danger, and the worst part is that it leads into more forest.
The trees encompass the road like a gateway, a black hole.
"You sure you got the right road?" David speaks up from the front of the group.
"Yes, I'm sure. It was a pretty obscure name…what other road would I have Egg & I confused with? Egg & Me?"
"No need to get your knickers in a twist, love. Just wanted to make sure," David mumbles, hunching over slightly, getting into his usual trial stance.
Hunched over, serious, ready to attack at a moment's notice.
Meg doesn't reply, neither does anyone else, as they walk into the black pit that is the trees, as it seems to swallow them whole.
Thankfully, only a few minutes pass with them walking in pitch black darkness before they come to another clearing, but as the group looks around, it does nothing to lessen their nerves.
There are a couple of broken down, collapsing barns on either side of the road, with sparse barren fields surrounding them. Meg almost wants to compare them to the barns and fields she saw on the Thompson maps, but she doesn't let her mind wander that far, not sure how she will feel if she let herself think about them completely.
"Do you think this is the place Jed Olsen was talking about?" Nea says, narrowing her eyes and looking around.
"I think so…he said something about the old barns on Egg & I…this should be it, unless there are more up the road, but here is a good place to start," Meg replies. Evan is by her side at this point, practically bumping into her as she turns around to look, but she doesn't bother to tell him to move out of the way as her eyes scan the area.
She doesn't see much except for the rotting wood making up ancient looking barns and buildings, and some old rusted farm equipment long forgotten that sits around the fields.
"Well, we can either go look as a group or split up. I vote we split up, cover more ground faster, and the faster we check, the faster we can get out of here," Nea demands, suddenly taking charge of the situation.
Meg swallows any arguments that she wants to say, knows she probably should say, but she feels so unsure right now, that Nea taking charge like this is almost welcomed.
"We can go alone, and the Trap-…Evan can go investigate the other barns," Nea instructs.
"Evan isn't going to just go off on his own," Meg argues, "What if something happens? Isn't the whole point of splitting up being to cover more ground and also be safe while we do it?"
"I still don't trust him and for you to go off with him alone? No. We stay together and if you're telling the truth, he can handle himself if he finds them before we do."
David stands off away from the group a little bit, looking around and not wanting to be in on the decision it seems like, and Meg almost wants to ask him what his opinion is, but she knows it would be pointless. He would agree with Nea, and awhile ago, she knows she would have agreed with her too.
Meg feels a big hand clasp her shoulder and squeeze.
"I'll be fine. You go with them," Evan says from behind her. She turns to look at him and for a moment, she doesn't know what emotions she should feel.
Looking at him, she instinctively grips the knife he gave her that she has in her pocket as she nods slowly.
"You have your knife right?" Meg asks, making sure he is as prepared as she is, although she doesn't feel nearly as powerful now that she thinks they could be splitting ways.
"Of course. You have yours?"
"Well someone wouldn't let me forget it," Meg says, scoffing and trying to roll her eyes in an attempt to lighten the mood, but it falls flat and feels awkwardly forced, but Evan doesn't point it out.
Instead he takes a tentative step forward before straightening his back and taking in a deep breath.
"Let's meet back here in ten minutes. I know it isn't a lot of time to search, but it should be enough to look through the barns and get an idea of what we are looking for. Here," Meg says, handing Evan the small flip phone she bought for him just yesterday, although now it feels like forever ago.
"Quick lesson, just open up the cell phone, and…hold on," she takes the phone back and pulls out hers, navigating the menus until she finds the phone number. Punching in the number to her phone, she tries to explain that it will be on the phone already available and if he needs her, he has to just push the green button.
Evan stares at the tiny phone like it is some sort of disgusting insect as he holds it in his hand, nodding along slowly to what Meg is saying. As she is explaining, she can feel Nea and David growing increasingly impatient behind her, but she doesn't care.
She has to make sure Evan is safe too.
He needs to be safe.
"Remember that promise earlier?" She asks as she finishes her quick cell phone tutorial. "I'll be with Nea and David…so I can make sure they'll be fine but please…Evan…" she reaches up and rests her slim hand against his bicep, hearing his breath hitch like it always does when she touches him. "Promise me that you'll be safe too."
Evan doesn't promise right away, but he takes another small step forward while lifting his hand up to brush hair from Meg's face, much like he did earlier that day, but now it doesn't seem as electrifying.
Now, it is a simple gesture that is almost serene, as he tucks her hair behind her ear and lets his hand linger for a moment before lowering it.
He doesn't say anything, but oddly enough Meg feels like that gesture alone was his promise. The feelings she felt deep in her chest were confirmation enough between them as he takes a step back and they stare at each other, forgetting that anyone else is around, before Evan turns and begins walking away towards the stray barn on the other side of the road.
Meg takes a moment, gathering her scattered thoughts, her breath, her heart…as she turns towards her friends as a way to ground herself to their task at hand.
She hates how Evan makes her feel, and she this morning she thought that was only a one time thing, a fluke…but now…
Now she wanted him to step closer, so she can touch him like he touched her, and she doesn't know why, and she doesn't want to think about how she enjoyed him being right beside her or right behind her for most of the day, or how it made her feel safe, protected.
Even though in any sane person's mind, she knows she should feel fear…
Meg walks back to Nea and David, and without a word, she beckons them forward with a her hand, as though to follow her towards the barns.
Only a few seconds pass before she knows one of her friends will decide to speak…
"So, what the fuck was that?" David's voice cuts through the air like a knife.
"Yeah, care to explain that to us?" Nea interjects. Her voice isn't mad or even irritated, just curious and when Meg looks at the two of her friends, she notices both of them have absolute dumbstruck looks on their faces.
"What?" Meg asks, looking forward again, trying to move on and pretend like what just happened between her and Evan was normal.
"Please don't tell me that we have to spell it out for you," Nea laughs as they walk towards the first barn. Meg's face begins burning as she waves at hand in Nea's direction.
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"Oh, so you just want us to ignore the fact that neither of you have left each others sides the whole day today, or how he just touched you back there?"
"Or how he keeps gettin' way too close to you. Thought I'd knock him out myself a few times, the way he makes himself comfortable practically suffocating you all the time. Personal space, bud," says David, cracking his knuckles.
Meg chuckles at that and shakes her head. "No, you guys, it's not like that…it's just…"
It's just like what?
Evan and her are partners in this whole weird mess as they are trying to figure out why they're here, right? She has helped him with things and he has helped her, but that doesn't mean that they are even friends, are they?
David scoffs and shakes his head as they reach the first barn, interrupting Meg's thoughts that she tries to justify before she tells them herself.
"I don't need to hear it anyways. You ladies have your girl talk, I'll look in here if you two look in the one over there," he says gesturing to a worn-down looking building a few hundred yards away. It doesn't look like a barn, but Meg can't tell what it is supposed to be. Maybe an abandoned house…she can't tell from this far away in the dark.
David doesn't wait for their approval before he splits off and trudges towards the barn himself, as Nea and Meg walk towards the house.
"Just because he doesn't want to hear it, doesn't mean I don't. Spill," Nea demands right away.
Meg lets out a nervous laugh and looks straight ahead, thankful that it is too dark for Nea to see the way her face flushes and she can't seem to make eye contact as they walk.
"I don't know, Nea. I mean, I can't explain it, I really can't. He isn't a bad person, and yes, I know what you're going to say, " Meg points a finger in Nea's direction before continuing, "I know you're going to say I'm crazy and try to remind me of what he's done…and I know. I can't forget what he's done…" she pauses for a moment before gathering her thoughts once more.
"But after everything, I think it is good that I've seen another side of him. He was just as stuck as we were there. Believe it or not, he didn't want to be killing us, but he was forced into it like we were."
"What?"
"I know!" she replies a little bit too loud," I know…It sounds crazy, especially since we all thought they loved it, but he didn't want to. And…it doesn't make it easier but…"
Nea's pace slows down and Meg matches it, almost as though they were hesitating on getting closer to the house, and also to prolong this conversation by just a little bit.
"Do you like him?" Nea asks, a hint of disgust in her voice that Meg ignores.
"I mean, as an acquaintance or maybe even friend I guess," Meg flounders, the question catching her off guard.
"No, you know what I mean. I saw you two in the rain earlier today, and I saw you now, and Meg…I've never seen you look at anyone the way you look at him."
Meg doesn't respond, not because she thinks she would deny it, but she honestly has no idea what to say, or where to even start. This conversation suddenly becomes too much for her and instead she takes a deep breath as they get closer to the house.
Her stomach is in knots and she tries to convince herself it is only because of the task that is set out for them, but she knows it is everything that has gone on the last few hours, and all she can do is take a deep breath and move forward, trying her best to remain calm.
Nea stares at her, expecting an answer, but when she doesn't get one, she doesn't push the subject any longer, which Meg is thankful for. This isn't quite a situation they've ever been in and she doesn't know how she would react if their roles were reversed, and she is just thankful that Nea is being a little understanding right now, or at least conscious knowing that maybe now isn't the time to get into some deep talk.
Meg can't even begin to think about that.
"Can I ask you something?" Meg asks as they approach the house, changing the subject.
"Of course."
"We are okay, right? Like, you and me. I know I messed up with everything earlier by not telling you what I have known the last day, and Nea, the thought that I could have messed up our friendship is enough to kill me."
Nea stops and turns to Meg, giving her a smirk.
"Meg, there is nothing you could do to get rid of me. You're stuck with me, sorry."
Relief washes over Meg as she pulls Nea in for a hug, trying her best not to cry into her shoulder. Not only was she worried they could get hurt here, which they still could, but she was worried all day that she lost her friends' trust on top of it.
"I was so worried..."
"I'm still not going to let you slide by without talking more about you and the big guy though," Nea says, pulling away. "But that can wait until later, okay?"
Meg nods, agreeing that they can talk about it later. That sounds good. It was almost a promise in itself. There will be a later for them, and they will get out of this just fine.
As they get closer to the house, they both notice the dark wood door isn't even on hinges, and instead it is propped to the side, resting on the doorframe. A gust of wind would be enough to blow it down, and that's what makes Meg's stomach sink.
Someone has been here recently to prop the door like that. Suddenly the lightness of the air between the two of them turns sour and heavy.
Glancing at Nea, Meg grips her knife so tight, she thinks it almost melts into her skin with the pressure. Nea goes first, shoving the door aside without as much of a backward glance or word of confirmation from Meg, and the door falls against the dusty ground with a loud crash.
Meg flinches back at the sudden noise but what really sets her nerves on fire is the distant deep scream she hears coming from the other barn that David is in.
Nea's head swings towards the sound and she stands frozen, as every second seems to last an hour and time stands still.
Meg looks around, and though she doesn't see much, she knows that there is someone in the other barn with David.
"Stay here!" Nea yells at Meg as she is already bursting out the front door, "Look around here, I'll go check on David!"
Meg stands still, debating whether to listen or to follow Nea. In the trials, they always had one person linger behind to work on a generator or cleanse a totem, and Meg isn't sure if Nea said that out of habit or what…
If there is something wrong there, she should be with them right?
She begins to jog out of the house when she hears a floorboard creak above her, and it makes her heart stop.
It could be the house settling…or someone could be here too…
Goddammit…
She looks between the exit and the stairs to her left that lead upstairs, wanting to explore what is in this house, but not wanting to go alone, as she also wants to go with Nea to make sure her and David are okay…
But if she just takes a quick peek upstairs, it can't hurt…hopefully.
Fuck.
She runs upstairs, already knowing that if there were anyone up here, that they would have heard her by now, so she bounds up the stairs, taking two of them at a time until she comes up to a small hallway with two rooms to her left and one to her right.
She picks a random room to her left, knowing there aren't many choices and she could get to the rest easily from there, but when she throws open the door with all of her weight, her eyes widen and her heart stops.
She sees a slouched figure in the darkness, and as soon as she shines her dim flashlight in the room, she sees the familiar pageboy cap and dreads from one of her best friends…
It can't be…
She was right…
"Claudette?" Meg runs up to her friend, collapsing on the ground in front of her. She squints in the darkness, straining her eyes, trying to see if Claudette is awake, breathing. It's too damn dark to see anything and in her haste to make it over, she threw down her phone beside her somewhere…
Gripping the front of Claudette's clothes, she brings her close as her blood turns cold when she realizes she is the only person talking. She hears nothing coming from Claudette.
"Claud?" She repeats, quieter this time, placing her hand on her friend's cold face. Her chest physically hurts as she is met with silence. "Claudette?"