AN: Welcome back everyone! Hope you all are enjoying the summer sun!
Before we begin:
To warrior of six blades; Chef's kiss for that amazing review you left! You, sir, are a talented writer! I've read some of your fics, and you've done fine work!
That being said, Tony's origin story is just a little bit different than the mainstream version. I'm sure you'll be amazed by what I've come up with.
For now, let's see what happens when Starfire tries to introduce a special Tamaranean holiday to the team!
Disclaimer: This author does not own the properties of Naruto, Marvel Comics, and DC Comics (unfortunately). This work is made for nonprofit entertainment purposes only.
"Hello there!": Speech.
'What a drag': Thoughts.
[I am Iron Man!]: Mechanical Speech
The Earth is Mine!: Monster/Demon Speech
Let'sgetiton!
Chapter 8
Happy Blorthog!
Location: Titans Tower, Jump City
The sun rises over the horizon, bringing a warm glow to the city of Jump. The morning crowds awaken and prepare for another day of living, as well as preparing themselves for any chaos to occur due to the ongoing War on Villainy.
The last battle between good and evil occurred three days ago, when the Teen Titans faced off against Doctor Light, a low-tier enemy of the Justice League. Apparently, he wanted to try his luck with a younger superhero team and attacked an armored truck transporting gold.
For his part, the not-so-good doctor actually put up a decent fight against the team, disabling several of the Titans. Raven was exceptionally vulnerable due to the dark nature of her magic.
And then he went and taunted her, asking her if she was "afraid of the light".
Raven's response?
Growing twice her size and transforming into an eldritch form with glowing red eyes before dragging Doctor Light into her body with black tendrils. She even went as far as taunting him back, asking him if he was "afraid of the dark".
Iron Man and Robin were able to snap her out of it, but not before the villain's tech-suit and psyche sustained substantial damage.
Needless to say, everyone was weary of Raven after that, especially Beast Boy.
Raven's anger continued into the next morning, prompting Beast Boy to do his own investigation into Raven's behavior by sneaking into her room, with Cyborg joining in to keep his green buddy out of trouble. That investigation led both of them into Raven's mind, where they met the personifications of her emotions and helped the sorceress handle her dormant rage – and apparently some "daddy issues"?
A mystery for another time.
The important thing was that Raven returned to her usual cool-headed self, and her friendship with Beast Boy and Cyborg deepened significantly.
Speaking of friendship…
Location: Starfire's Room
RiIiIing!
The morning alarm rouses Starfire from her sleep. She gasps as her eyes open with excitement.
"The day has arrived!" Starfire exclaims happily before shutting off her Mumbo alarm clock.
After quickly getting dressed, the alien girl opens one of her drawers, revealing an assortment of colorful gifts, including several handmade bead necklaces. She scoops up the gifts with a giggle before heading out of her room.
The sliding door opens, and Starfire peeks her head out to check for anyone walking by. Seeing nobody, she giggles again before exiting her room and sneakily moving through the halls of the tower, her gifts piled high in her arms.
[Good morning, Starfire.]
"Eep!" Starfire squeaks out as the synthetic voice of Jarvis startles her. She gets her stack of presents back under control before addressing the voice. "Goodest of mornings to you, Friend Jarvis!"
[I can't help but notice the large number of wrapped presents in your arms,] Jarvis notes. [I was unaware of any holidays scheduled for today in my calendar.]
"There is a holiday today, Friend Jarvis, for today is Blorthog, the Tamaranean Festival of Friendship!" Starfire answers jovially. "It is my first time celebrating this joyous holiday on Earth, and I wish to enjoy it with all of the new friends I've made here!" Her happy expression then turns sheepish. "I regret that I was unable to find you a present in time."
[Given that I'm a program, I believe that finding gifts for on such as myself would be difficult, to say the least,] Jarvis points out. [Still, I appreciate the effort made.]
Starfire perks back up. "Thank you, my friend!"
[Anyways, I'm sure Mr. Stark will be more than eager to celebrate this "Blorthog" with you and the team. I'm sending him the information about this holiday as we speak, and he's currently on his way here. The others are in the living room,] Jarvis informs the alien girl.
"Splendid!" Starfire says as she heads out to meet her friends.
Just before she reaches the door to the living room, Jarvis speaks up. [I should warn you, though, the mood in the room is…less than friendly, currently.]
"I'm sure my bounty of gifts and cheer will make everything better!" Starfire replies with optimism.
[I certainly hope so,] Jarvis says with a hint of trepidation in his synthetic voice.
With that, the door opens, and Starfire enters with her gifts.
"HAPPY BLORTHOG!" Starfire exclaims with joy.
Sadly, her exclamation falls on deaf ears to her confusion. She looks over her pile of gifts and notes how Raven is reading her book as usual, Beast Boy and Cyborg are fighting over a game controller, and Robin is standing off to the side with an annoyed expression as E-40 is blasted right at his face from a nearby speaker.
"C'mon, Beast Boy! Gimme that thing!" Cyborg demands as he wrestles for the controller.
"Dude! I'm in the middle of a game, Cyborg!" Beast Boy yells.
"Yeah! My game because it's my turn!" Cyborg counters.
[I did warn you,] Jarvis points out to Starfire.
Steeling herself, Starfire walks over to her friends, hoping to end the less-than-friendly atmosphere.
"Friends! We must leap and frolic in glorious celebration, for today is Blorthog, the Tamaranean Festival of Friendship!" Starfire declares with a bright smile.
None of the other Titans even look in her direction.
Starfire's smile drops along with the gifts in her hands, though she holds on to the necklaces. Her smile returns as she approaches Cyborg, who's still grappling with Beast Boy.
"Joyous greeting, friend!" Starfire greets the mechanical teen as she holds up a necklace. "I, Starfire, give you this Tinabula as a symbol of–"
"Agh!" Cyborg yells as a green tentacle pulls him away. "You're gonna pay for that, you little grass-stain!"
Starfire watches unamused as a scuffle occurs in front of her, with a green toad coming out victorious as he shifts back to human and starts playing with the controller.
Starfire tries with Beast Boy. "Many blessings, friend! May your years be filled with sugar candies and–"
"BEAST BOY!" Cyborg shouts in anger, cutting off Starfire.
"Look, I'll give you back the controller as soon as Raven gives back my nail clippers!" Beast Boy yells as he glares at the dark sorceress, before he gets pulled back with a yelp by Cyborg.
"Not gonna happen," Raven states as the aforementioned clippers float next to her. "How else am I supposed to keep your toenails off the coffee table?"
Starfire next approaches Raven with a smile. "Happiness and delight, friend! On this wonderous day, I wish you sunshine and…funny…"
Raven's annoyed and murderous expression speaks volumes. Starfire chuckles nervously as she backs away from the goth girl.
Raven's annoyance focuses on the Boy Wonder. "Robin, could the music be any louder? I can still hear myself think."
Starfire, with necklace in hand, walks towards Robin, who's anger grows at the scuffle going on nearby.
"I only turned the music up to DROWN OUT ALL THE YELLING!" Robin yells, blowing Starfire away.
All previous excitement is drained out of Starfire as she watches the chaos around her.
"Who's turn is it now, tough guy?! Who's turn is it now?!" Cyborg gloats as he grips Beast Boy in a chokehold and waves the controller above him.
"Knock it off!" Robin demands. "I can't work with you two acting like idiots!"
"Great, Robin. More yelling will definitely stop all the yelling," Raven says sarcastically.
Starfire looks on as Robin and Raven are now glaring at each other while a green bear chases Cyborg around the room.
"Friends, please!" Starfire pleads. "You must not…if we could simply…Happy Blor–"
Cyborg suddenly knocks Starfire down by accident, causing her to stumble to her knees and the necklace in her hands to break. She watches in despair as the beads she painstakingly strung together clatter to the ground.
At this point, Tony excitedly enters the room. "So, what's this I hear about a…holiday…?"
Tony's excitement leaves him as he sees Robin and Raven in an angry stare-off, Cyborg in a tug-of-war with a green bear, and Starfire kneeling on the ground with a tearful expression.
Tony sighs tiredly. "Jarvis, initiate Party Stopper Protocol. Authorization, Stark Oscar Bravo."
[Yes, sir.]
The other Titans (excluding Starfire) are startled as all of the power in the room suddenly shuts off. The lights cut out, the video game on the TV turns off, and the blaring music is instantly silenced. The morning sun is the only thing illuminating the room.
"Yo, what happened to the game?!" Cyborg exclaims as he fiddles with the controller to no avail.
"Can't exactly read with this amount of light," Raven grumbles.
"Tony! I needed that music!" Robin complains.
"Yeah, dude! What's the big idea?!" Beast Boy demands.
Tony's response is to simply point at Starfire. The other Titans turn to where he's pointing and see the team cinnamon roll on her knees crying in front of a stack of gifts and some fallen beads.
"…Ah crud," Beast Boy mutters as he and the three around him wince in shame.
"Since you so kindly asked, Beast Boy, the 'big idea' was that the six of us would be celebrating this Festival of Friendship Jarvis told me about called Blorthog, which would be especially significant considering it's Starfire's first celebration with us on Earth. Now I'm here, and I see the bright and cheerful Starfire crying in sadness while her friends are fighting around her," Tony states as he glares at the four standing titans like a disappointed father. "Would any of you four care to explain how we got here?"
The four Titans slowly raise their hands.
"Without finger-pointing?" Tony adds.
The four Titans slowly lower their hands.
Starfire finally wipes her eyes and gets back on her feet. She gives her friends a pleading look. "Please! Friends should not behave this way, especially not on Blorthog! Do you wish to invite the Rekmas?!"
"Gesundheit?" Beast Boy says in confusion.
"On my world, Rekmas means 'The Drifting'," Starfire explains somberly. "It is the point where close friends begin to drift apart, and their friendship begins to die."
Tony's upset expression turns solemn at his friend's words.
"Ah, come on, Starfire. That's not what's happening here," Cyborg argues.
"We're totally not Rek-whatevering," Beast Boy assures the girl.
"We're getting on each other's nerves a little. Big deal," Raven says nonchalantly.
"Yeah. This is just typical roommate stuff," Robin says to his crush. "We're not going to drift apart, Star. I promise. We'll all be friends forever."
"Forever?" Starfire asks hopefully.
"Absolutely!" Tony answers loudly as he approaches Starfire with a big grin. "In fact, to prove to you that we'll be friends forever, we're all going out on the town to celebrate Blorthog together!"
Starfire gasps as excitement fills her again. "We are?!"
Robin gives Tony a puzzled look. "We are?"
"Yep!" Tony confirms as he places a hand on Starfire's shoulder. "I have the whole day off from work, which means we have all day to enjoy the Festival of Friendship! It'll be fun, it'll be exciting, and, most importantly, it'll be mandatory!" He turns to the rest of the team with his grin still on his face. "Isn't that right, friends?"
The other Titans flinch as the image of a giant snarling fox appears over Tony.
"Y-Yeah! Totally!" Beast Boy answers quickly with a shaky grin.
"I didn't really wanna play that game anyway!" Cyborg says with a nervous smile.
"I could use some fresh air, actually!" Robin adds.
Raven sighs, then smiles as she reforms the broken necklace with her power. "I'm not much of a fun in the sun kind of person, but for the sake of friendship, I guess it can't kill me."
"Glorious!" Starfire proclaims.
Tony puts on his sunglasses. "Alright, Titans! Let's make this the best Blorthog ever!"
(Insert Theme Song: Teen Titans Theme)
Location: Hitchcock Tower, Founder's Park, Jump City
Timeskip: One hour later
The Titans find themselves atop Hitchcock Tower, a famous landmark in Jump City. The height of the tower and its location on top of Telegram Hill make it one of the highest points in town. At the peak of the tower, visitors are treated with a spacious 360˚ view of the city, which Starfire is enjoying with her friends.
"Breathtaking," Starfire says with a smile as she watches the morning sun's glow wash over the buildings. "I've rarely seen the city from so high up, especially when there are no villains to fight."
"That's surprising, since you can fly around whenever you want. I'm honestly jealous," Robin admits. "If I had that ability, I'd be using it almost all the time."
"You mean, like a robin?" Beast Boy quips with a cheeky grin.
"Very funny, Beast Boy," Robin with a smile, "but, actually, yeah."
"Dude, take it from a guy who's been every bird and flying dinosaur imaginable, flying isn't as carefree as you think it is," Beast Boy advises sagely. "It's a lot of hard work keeping yourself airborne."
Starfire looks at her green friend questioningly. "Is that true? Do you not feel joyous elation when you fly?"
"Well, sometimes I do when I'm just coasting with an air current at my back, but then I have to watch out for hawks, poachers, or kids with rocks," Beast Boy explains. "Besides, I can't really enjoy the view or take a camera up with me."
"Maybe I can hook you up with a camera vest or something," Cyborg offers.
"Sweet!" Beast Boy replies.
"Honestly, I prefer a view with less buildings in it, but that's just me," Raven chimes in, before turning to Iron Man. "So, Fearless Leader, how are we doing this whole 'Blorthog' thing?"
Iron Man taps his helmet, and blue beams of light emit from his eyes. The beams coalesce to form a holographic map of Jump City.
[Okay, starting here, we'll head over to Seafarer's Wharf first, grab some breakfast, and see the sights. We'll then head south and tour Chinatown real quick before heading west for the Jump Academy of Science,] Iron Man explains. [We can also pick up some swimsuits along the way.]
The team looks at Iron Man in confusion.
"Swimsuits? For what?" Cyborg asks.
Iron Man smiles in his helmet. "That's a surprise."
Location: Seafarer's Wharf
Per Tony's plan, the Titans first visit Seafarer's Wharf, a highly popular seaside destination for tourists. Thankfully, the wharf is less crowded at the moment due to the early morning hours and the fact that it's a weekday. Still, there are plenty of people there to take photos of the visiting heroes.
Tony steers Starfire over to some local seafood restaurants where she can try some bread bowl clam chowder, and act that quickly results in the alien girl enjoying a seafood buffet, to the horror of Beast Boy. Starfire quickly develops a love for seafood, especially lobster and crab, which she compares to something called 'cregnorg' on Tamaran. Nobody else bothers for the details.
After the bountiful and expensive meal, Starfire is guided to Pier 39, where scores of sea lions nap on the docks for everyone to see. The sight makes Starfire squeal in delight, especially when a green sea lion tries to join in the fray, only for several normal sea lions to bark at him and drive him away. Defeated, the green sea lion swims away, sulking as the others laugh at the performance, Cyborg especially.
At the mention of the Ghirardelli Chocolate Shop a couple of blocks away by a passing tourist, Starfire quickly flies away, leaving a dust cloud in her wake. After taking a moment to process the sudden departure of their sweet naïve friend, the other Titans quickly rush to catch up to her. Unfortunately, they don't reach the shop in time to stop her from scooping up a quarter ton of chocolate. Tony takes care of the purchase, though he mourns for his bank account.
Location: Chinatown
After that little sidetrack, the team heads to Chinatown, where they walk the streets and have impromptu meet-and-greets with the fascinated locals, though with some reluctance from Raven. Starfire enjoys the activity the most, especially after she somehow learns Mandarin and Cantonese in the span of a half-hour. Some kind of alien language-learning ability, perhaps?
After slowly making their way through the streets, Tony takes the Titans to his favorite massage parlor, where they all enjoy a nice relaxing hour with the experienced masseuses.
Except for Cyborg, on account of his metal body.
Fortunately for him, the manager of the parlor quickly calls up her brother, who runs a body shop. Within minutes, Cyborg is treated to a full-body polish and a fresh coat of paint at quite a bargain.
Location: Jump Academy of Science
The team's next stop is the Academy of Science in Dragon's Gate Park, something that Beast Boy grumbles about, complaining about "spending hours in a boring old museum". He quickly changes his tune, however, when he finds the massive Tropical Rainforest Exhibit, which he has a blast in as a green parrot.
While he's wilding out, the rest of the Titans are in the planetarium learning about coral reefs and their importance in the health of Planet Earth – except for Cyborg, who passed out halfway through the showing.
Starfire watches the documentary with rapt attention while Robin sits next to her. The Boy Wonder's cheeks are red due to his closeness to his crush. The redness grows as she leans into him, their shoulders touching and their heads inches from each other. Starfire is oblivious to the boy's plight as she continues learning about the planet that's slowly feeling like home to her.
Robin turns and sees Tony and Raven giving him thumbs up from several seats away. He looks annoyed at the gestures but gives his own thumb up in return.
Location: Splashing Dragon Water Park
Timeskip: One hour later
Iron Man lands in a crouch in a parking lot before rising to his feet. The armor sheds off and Tony exits the suit wearing a pair of orange swim trunks, a pair of water shoes, and a form-fitting black swim shirt. He looks across the lot, where lines of people are waiting to enter the fairly large aquatic amusement park with the sign of a cartoonish dragon at the front.
Cyborg approaches Tony's side with an excited expression. "Yo, is that the new water park?"
"Yep!" Tony answers with a smile. "It just opened a week ago, and I've been meaning to visit. I figure this'll be the perfect highlight for Blorthog."
Cyborg looks over his exposed metal body. "Damn. I kinda feel underdressed."
Tony gives Cyborg a look. "Dude, you had an opportunity to buy some trunks when we were on our way to the museum."
Cyborg rubs the back of his head sheepishly. "I didn't think I'd need one at the time, all things considered."
A green eagle suddenly flies towards the two while clutching a pair of purple swim trunks in its talons. The eagle gets close before shifting into a human, with his legs shooting into the trunks mid-change.
Beast Boy stands up straight and grins triumphantly in his trunks. "Ha! Told you guys I could pull it off!"
"Great, but how's that gonna work if you shift in the water?" Tony questions. "Your trunks can't change like your suit does."
"Easy. I just don't change," Beast Boy answers simply. "I don't have to be a dolphin or an octopus to enjoy the water."
At this point, Robin approaches the group while picking at his green Speedos, which the group notices.
"What's up with you?" Cyborg asks the Boy Wonder.
"I'm kinda second guessing my choice in swimwear," Robin answers. "I mean, everyone can see my…you know…"
"Says the guy who wears colorful tight tights and a cape on a regular basis," Tony points out, earning him a glare from Robin and snickers from the other guys. Tony holds his hands up. "I'm just curious about where the line's drawn…on second thought, nevermind."
Raven arrives next with her cloak over a black one-piece swimsuit and a pair of rounded black shades. "If it's any consolation, Robin, you're not the only one uncomfortable here."
"Isn't that close to what you usually wear, anyway?" Beast Boy points out, only to recoil at the death glare being sent his way. "You know what, forget I said anything."
'It's not my fault I dress like that. It's the warmest version of my sorcery outfit.' Raven laments mentally.
"Pardon me, friends."
Everyone turns and sees Starfire land next to them wearing a very revealing purple bikini.
"Do I look…pleasant?" Starfire asks nervously.
"Absolutely!" Robin answers quickly with a big smile on his face, ignoring the knowing looks being sent his way.
Starfire beams. "Glorious! You look wonderful as well, Robin!"
Robin rubs his head nervously. "T-Thanks, Star."
"Well, now that the gang's all here, let's hit the park!" Tony declares, getting cheers from the others as they all head for the water park.
At the entrance, a reporter and her news crew are filming next to the long lines for the park.
"A week after the Splashing Dragon opened its doors, the newly built water park has already become a Jump City icon," the reporter says to the camera. "As you can see behind me, the lines are long and packed as city dwellers and even visitors from the greater Bay Area are – wait! Who's that heading this way?" The reporter looks astonished at who she spots approaching. "My goodness! It's the Teen Titans!"
The film crew and all the civilians in line quickly turn and gape as they see Jump City's guardians casually approach the front ticket desk.
"Hi there," Tony greets the ticket agent. "Stark. Party of 6."
The ticket agent looks at his list. "Yep. Got you right here. Let me get your wristbands."
As the team waits for their wrist bands, the reporter approaches them.
"Mr. Stark! I'm Valerie Schnee with Channel 5 News," the reporter introduces herself while the cameraman films. "You here to enjoy some downtime with your team?"
Tony smiles at the camera. "Yes, and to celebrate a special day for our friend here," he answers as he gestures to Starfire.
Valerie turns towards the redhead. "Oh? What's the occasion?"
"Today is Blorthog, the Tamaranean Festival of Friendship!" Starfire answers jovially. "On my home world, we commemorate the holiday with mountains of gifts and joyful activities! I've never celebrated Blorthog on Earth before, but I've already had so much fun!"
"And the hope is that we'll have double the fun here at the Splashing Dragon," Tony finishes.
"Here are your wristbands," says the ticket agent as he passes the wristbands to the group.
Tony puts on his wristband and turns towards the group. "Alright, team, our mission is simple; have fun!"
"Yeah!" the Titans shout as they join Tony in rushing into the water park.
Location: Unknown
[Well, looks like there's more to celebrate this season than we thought! Maybe we Earthlings can enjoy a Festival of Friendship someday!] Valerie Schnee reports from the small television. [For now, we wish our brave heroes a well-deserved day of fun and relaxation! This is Valerie Schnee with Channel 5 News saying 'Happy Blorthog'!...Did I say that right?]
The television plays in a small room crammed full of disassembled equipment, computer monitors, and tubes full of icy-blue liquid. The most notable part of the room, though, is the freezing temperature, shown by the sheets of frost on the walls and the cool mist lingering about.
A figure in a large mechanical suit watches the news report with narrowed eyes.
"So, Stark wants to have some fun in the sun, eh?" the figure mutters lowly. "It would be a shame if someone put his celebrations on ice, wouldn't it?"
Location: Splashing Dragon Water Park
Timeskip: One hour later
Starfire can honestly say that this has been one of the best Blorthogs she's ever been a part of, especially with her first ever visit to a water park. The flowing waters, man-made slides, and clear pools remind her of the waterfalls at the Sacred Royal Pools she used to play in as a child. Sadly, they were destroyed and ruined during the war against the Gordanians, but at least she can relive the magic here at the Splashing Dragon. The winding water slides are especially joyful!
The rest of the team shares in her merriment, with Tony and Robin racing each other on the Drenching Dragstrip, and Beast Boy competing with Cyborg on the diving boards over who can make the biggest splash. Beast Boy cheats somewhat by transforming into a walrus during one splash, an act that he's punished for when he loses his trunks during the change, much to his embarrassment.
Raven, meanwhile, spends her time relaxing on a floatie and reading her book while riding the Lazy River. Occasionally, she has to use her magic to intercept incoming water spray, not to mention blocking the gaze of guys who stare at her figure a little too long.
Of course, nobody turns heads like Starfire, who draws crowds of onlookers every time she rises out of the water and flicks her hair back, showing off her flawless fit body. This draws the ire of Robin, who constantly glares at the fervent lookers to drive them away.
At the moment, the team has regrouped at the Food Court, where they're resting up and having lunch.
"Dudes! We have so got to come here more often!" Beast Boy declares as he chows down on a veggie burger.
"I hear ya, BB! I haven't been to a water park in years!" Cyborg says while eating his very-meaty cheeseburger.
"Oh, what a glorious day it has been! This Blorthog has turned out better than I could have ever hoped!" Starfire declares with a bottle of mustard in hand. "Thank you all so much for celebrating with me, my friends! And thank you for organizing our activities, Tony!"
"Think nothing of it, Star. I just wish the day was longer, so we can do even more," Tony laments as he eats his own cheeseburger.
"You don't feel like you went over-the-top as it is?" Raven asks while enjoying a grape popsicle.
"Nonsense! You can never go over-the-top when it comes to having fun with your friends," Tony answers proudly.
"I bet a guy like you has a whole city full of friends, eh?" Beast Boy guesses.
Tony takes a moment to finish his bite of burger before answering, "Actually, it's a lot smaller than you think. Apart from you guys, there's Pepper, my unofficial second-in-command at Stark Industries. There's also Stan, the mayor. Then there's Rhodey. He's a Colonel in the U.S. Air Force."
Robin looks confused at the last part. "I thought you didn't work with the military."
"I don't make weapons for the military. There's a difference," Tony explains. "Stark Industries' government contracts involve non-lethal inventions like gadgets, body armor, and vehicles. My favorite contracts involve designing high-speed jets, which have weapons added on to them by other companies. Rhodey acts as the middleman between my company and the Air Force. That's how we met."
"Do you have any friends that are your age, besides us?" Raven asks.
"Yeah. You told me about that one friend you had years ago. Was there anyone else?" Cyborg asks.
Tony looks hesitant. "Well, the thing about that is…did it get chilly all of a sudden?"
"Nice deflection," Raven mutters.
"Hold on. I'm feeling it too," Robin states as he rubs his chest to warm up.
"Uh, guys…" Beast Boy says as he points towards the front entrance.
The rest of the Titans turn and see civilians running away from the entrance, where several jagged pillars of ice have formed.
"Oh no. Not this douche again," Tony groans as he stands up and pulls up his wristwatch. "Jarvis, send over the Icebreaker."
[Yes, sir,] Jarvis responds.
Tony's regular armor lands next to him and opens itself up, allowing him to step inside.
"Okay, Titans," Tony says as the armor closes around him, [back on the clock.]
Location: Front Entrance
Several civilians run for safety and try to avoid the icy-blue blasts of freezing energy. A hot dog stand, a ticket booth, and a cartoony dragon statue are among the attractions now frozen in blocks of ice.
As a family tries to escape, their youngest daughter trips and falls to the ground, crying in fear and pain from her scraped knee. The rest of the family watches in horror as a freezing beam shoots right at the girl…
…only for a shield of black energy to protect her.
The girl looks up and smiles at seeing a fully suited Raven protecting her.
Raven kneels down to the girl and places a glowing hand on the injured knee. "Allow me. Azarath Metrion Zinthos."
After a couple of seconds, the girl's knee heals completely, and she's delighted to feel no pain.
"Thank you!" the girl says in delight, causing Raven to smile back.
"Get to safety," Raven advises as the other costumed Titans group up with her.
The girl nods and runs back to her family as the heroes get ready to confront the villain, who's form is obscured in a chilling mist.
[You just can't help ruining a good summer's day, can you, Jack Frost?] Iron Man calls out.
[You know I'm more a fan of winter, Stark,] the villain replies as he steps out of the mist, revealing a tall and somewhat boxy snow-white mech suit with a rectangular helmet, tubes of blue liquid running from his back, and a large cannon-like weapon where his right arm is. [And the name is Blizzard.]
Iron Man scans the enemy's suit as the other Titans ready their arsenal. "You've sure upgraded from a parka and a freeze gun, Donny."
[I've gotten a new sponsor, Stark,] Blizzard reveals. [He and I have a common interest in destroying you brats.]
Robin glares. "Slade."
[With my new and improved cryogenic technology, I'll finish what you started ages ago!] Blizzard declares as he aims his weapon at the team.
[Titans, GO!] Iron Man shouts as he and the other Titans jump away from the freezing blast.
Iron Man and Robin start the fight by respectively firing a missile and throwing some explosive disks at the villain. Blizzard counters by firing an ice beam at the weapons, which freeze solid and fall to the ground harmlessly. Raven levitates a pretzel cart and launches it at the villain, who coalesces his cold energy to form an "ice fist", which he uses to punch the cart away. Beast Boy flies as a hawk to try and get an overhead advantage, but Blizzard notices and fires his ice blaster above him, creating a cloud of snow that soon envelopes the green bird. Beast Boy soon plummets to the ground with a fresh layer of snow covering his body.
Beast Boy shivers as he reverts back to human and looks towards Robin. "Told you flying isn't all it's cracked out to be."
Cyborg fires his sonic cannon at Blizzard while Starfire launches her starbolts. Blizzard responds by firing his ice blaster at the ground in front of him, creating wall of ice that absorbs the attacks. Blizzard then goes on the offensive, firing his ice beams at the Titans, who dodge and fly away from the attacks.
[Okay, so Frosty's arsenal has definitely improved since last time we fought,] Iron Man comments as he fires his repulsors at Blizzard, who stumbles away from them before returning fire.
"I'll say. He's less Captain Cold and more Mr. Freeze," Robin notes as he flips away from the icy bursts.
"Are they villains of ice as well?" Starfire asks in curiosity as she throws her starbolts.
"Yeah. Mr. Freeze is a Gotham villain with a cryogenic suit that Batman and I fought a few times," Robin explains. "He's actually not that evil once you get to know him."
[Then there's Captain Cold in Central City,] Iron Man adds as he continues blasting. [He's one of The Flash's Rogues, and he uses a freeze gun.]
"Don't forget Killer Frost," Raven points out as she shields herself. "She's a metahuman that's gone up against the Justice League before."
"Isn't Icicle a metahuman, too?" Cyborg asks as he defrosts Beast Boy.
Beast Boy, fully thawed, stops shivering. "Doesn't that guy have a kid? Icicle Jr.?"
"I had no idea that there were so many," Starfire says in surprise.
[Yeah, it's a common theme in the villain community,] Iron Man comments. [Ice powers are mid-tier at best, honestly.]
Blizzard growls at the last statement. [I'll show you mid-tier!] he yells as he gathers cold energy in his blaster before slamming it into the ground. The energy spreads wide in front of him as a thick wave of spiky ice heads straight for the Titans.
Most of the Titans fly or jump away, but Cyborg is caught in the wave. In seconds, he finds himself frozen up to his neck.
"Ah, man!" Cyborg complains as he struggles to free himself.
Iron Man looks down at the thick ice that's enveloped the entire front area of the park. [Well, I stand corrected.]
Hearing some large thuds behind him, Blizzard turns and sees a green T-Rex charging right at him.
Blizzard scoffs. [You know what killed the dinosaurs, right?] he asks before firing his cold gun at the ground in front of the T-Rex, who slips and falls forward. Before the dinosaur can recover, the ice villain fires his weapon again and encases the dino in a thick block of ice.
Beast Boy reverts back into a human, freeing his body though he's still trapped in the ice shell. He shivers as he looks around his icy prison.
"D-Dude! If I g-get pneumonia, y-you're g-gonna p-pay!" Beast Boy yells before shifting into a yak and slamming into the ice to free himself.
With two Titans out, Blizzard focuses on the others, who have regrouped behind Raven's shield. [You'll freeze in hell for what you did to me, Stark!] Blizzard declares as he fires at the shield.
"I take it there's some history?" Robin asks.
[His name's Donald Gill,] Iron Man answers. [He was a researcher at Stark Industries studying to find the secret of immortality through cryogenics, but I fired him after he was caught trying to steal some of my tech to sell on the black market.]
"That's an awful lot of rage for a just termination," Starfire comments.
[Well, I may have made him trip on my foot while he was escaping, causing him to shoot himself in the face with his prototype freeze gun, but I feel like that's mainly his fault.]
"Backstories are pointless right now," Raven states as she struggles to reinforce her shield. "We need to figure out how to stop him."
"If he's anything like Mr. Freeze, then there should be a power supply somewhere in his suit," Robin deduces, "so what we need to do is–"
Robin is cut off as something flies over the shield and lands amongst the group. The Titans look down and see what appears to be a glowing-blue grenade.
"–MOVE!"
BOOM!
A flash of blue swallows the team. When the flash dissipates, Blizzard sees Robin and Raven trapped in a dome of ice, spared complete freezing by Raven's shield, while Iron Man and Starfire are fully encased.
Blizzard chuckles. [This really is the best way to serve up revenge.]
A green glow emanates from Starfire's form before a massive amount of green star energy is unleashed, freeing the Tamaranean from her prison.
Blizzard gives an impressed hum. [You're tougher than you look, girlie.]
"I have handled the frigid blackness of space, and I most certainly can handle you!" Starfire declares before flying at the villain.
[Challenge accepted!] Blizzard yells as he fires his ice blaster at the approaching alien.
Starfire intercepts the blasts with her starbolts, causing mini explosions between the heroine and villain. She launches a larger bolt at Blizzard, who blocks it with his own blast, though the resulting explosion makes him stumble backwards. This leaves him unprepared for Starfire to slam into him and take him up into the sky.
Back at ground level, the other Titans struggle to free themselves from their ice prisons.
Tony shivers slightly in his suit. "Jarvis, talk to me!"
[Icebreaker will arrive right…about…now,] Jarvis responds.
A sudden thud next to Tony gets his attention and makes him smile.
Meanwhile, Starfire and Blizzard are grappling with each other above the park.
"I will not tolerate your villainy anymore!" Starfire declares. "You are ruining Blorthog!"
Blizzard scoffs. [You mean your little 'friendship day'? You should be thanking me. I'm sparing you a lot of heartache!]
Blizzard slams his head into Starfire's, disorienting her and leaving her open to an ice punch, causing them both to start falling to the ground. Starfire rights herself in the air, while Blizzard creates an ice slope to slide to safety.
[Here's the cold truth, girlie! Tony Stark doesn't have friends! You're just another employee! He's using you for his own gain, and when he's done with you, he'll throw you away like trash!] Blizzard yells at the alien girl.
"I have no patience for your words of deceit!" Starfire responds.
[Fine. If words won't convince you, then maybe this will,] Blizzard says before opening up his helm, revealing an older male's face with heavy dark scarring all over his right side and a bloodshot right eye. "This is what happens to those abandoned by Tony Stark!"
"Those wounds are from your own greed," Starfire counters.
"Greed!? I was close to a breakthrough! So close to finding the secret to immortality for all mankind!" Donald Gill defends. "All I needed was a boost in funds, but Stark said no! I did what I had to do, and I ended up getting fired! Imprisoned! Humiliated! All because of some brat who wouldn't know true genius if it hit him like an avalanche!"
[Interesting comment, Donny. Here's my rebuttal.]
VRI-SHOOM!
Donald is suddenly blasted to his side by an orange repulsor beam, causing him to fly into a photo booth. Blizzard's helmet closes as he struggles to stand up from the unexpected blast. He turns and sees the Titans have regrouped, now free of their ice prisons.
His focus, however, is on Tony Stark, who appears to be wearing a bulkier white-and-gold version of Iron Man with orange eyes and repulsors.
[What the…?] Blizzard groans as he gets back on his feet.
[Where are my manners? Icemaker, meet Icebreaker,] Iron Man introduces before flying at the ice villain.
Blizzard fires an ice beam right at the armored hero, who's form glows orange as he takes the hit, causing steam to erupt from the impact. Iron Man flies out of the steam without a single bit of frost on him.
[How the…?] Blizzard mutters in shock before grunting as Iron Man punches him and sends him flying right at Starfire.
Starfire's fists glow green as she swings them both down in a hammer strike, causing the villain to crash into the ground.
Or he would have, if the clubbed tail of a green ankylosaur didn't slam into his side, sending him tumbling back towards the front entrance.
As Blizzard once again stumbles back onto his feet, a disk thrown by Robin latches onto his suit, causing it to short-circuit. Blizzard is able to freeze the disk off but finds his feet sinking into an inky black mass of magic, courtesy of Raven.
This distraction leaves him unprepared for the heavily armored white-and-blue fist of Cyborg.
POW! "Booyah!"
The uppercut sends Blizzard once more into the air, where Starfire and Iron Man are waiting. Both heroes shout as they fire beams of green and orange energy right at the villain. Blizzard is just able to make a shield of ice, but the beams shatter the shield and slam into him, sending him crashing down into the parking lot of the water park.
Blizzard groans in pain as he struggles in the crater made by his landing, while the heroes surround him.
[You should quit while you're ahead, Ice Miser,] Iron Man advises.
"And while you're at it, tell us about Slade!" Robin demands.
Blizzard shakily gets back onto his feet. [You think it's over? You think I'm through!?] he yells as a turbulent sphere of cold winds suddenly whip up around him while ice forms at his feet. [You've made a fool of me for the last time, Stark! I'M GONNA FREEZE THE LIFE OUT OF YOU, YOUR TEAM, AND THIS WHOLE DAMN CITY!]
The sphere extends outwards, forcing the Titans back.
[Sir, the environment is becoming extremely hostile,] Jarvis informs. [Temperatures are dropping to critical levels.]
[He's producing a sphere…of sheer cold!] Iron Man grunts. [If this goes on, he'll freeze a half-mile around him in minutes!]
"There's still people in the area!" Robin cries out.
[Listen! Star and I can handle this temperature! We'll take him down! The rest of you get the people to safety!] Iron Man commands.
"On it!" Cyborg calls out as he, Robin, Raven, and Beast Boy leave to start evacuations.
Iron Man turns to Starfire. [I'll grab him! You finish him!]
Starfire nods and flies up into the air.
Iron Man's body glows red-hot as he approaches the villain inside the sphere. With considerable effort, the hero's able to get close and grab Blizzard's arms, holding them in place.
[Sir, the suit's heating system is about to give out!] Jarvis informs loudly.
[Kuso! I'm freezing faster than I'm thawing!] Iron Man yells as ice crystals form around his arms.
Blizzard laughs triumphantly. [Don't worry, Stark. Freezing isn't a bad way to go. Take it from me.]
The villain suddenly sees a green glow in the corner of his vision. He looks to his side and sees Starfire flying in a high speed with glowing green fists.
[No! Wait!]
WHAM!
Blizzard cries out in pain as Starfire slams her fists into his side, causing his body to skip across the parking lot before crashing into a truck. Blizzard dislodges himself from the truck and stumbles around as his entire body aches in pain.
That's when he notices the blue sparks coming from his back.
[No…what…what have you…?] Blizzard mutters in horror before the sphere of cold forms again, this time focusing inward. The villain only has a moment to reach out for help before the sphere solidifies with a crunch, freezing him in a perfect sphere of ice.
The danger seemingly ended, Iron Man and Starfire land next to the frozen villain, with the other Titans soon joining them.
"Is he…?" Starfire asks nervously, hoping she hasn't done what she fears.
Iron Man scans the trapped villain. [He's alive. His vital signs are good. He's been cryogenically frozen.]
Cyborg does his own scan. "His cold energy is leaking out of his suit. It'll keep the ice from melting. The energy will run out eventually, but that could take months – maybe even years."
Iron Man's helmet opens, revealing Tony's somber face. "You wanted the secret to immortality, Donny. Looks like you found it."
Location: Jump Beach
Timeskip: Early evening
Only a sliver of the setting sun remains in the horizon, bathing the evening sky with bands of purple and red light in a black backdrop. The Teen Titans (minus Iron Man) watch the fading light and listen to the crashing of ocean waves as they sit around a lit fire pit on the sandy beach.
They're especially appreciative of the roaring fire considering their most recent fight.
"Dude, who would have thought that we'd nearly get frostbite in the middle of summer?" Beast Boy says as he vigorously rubs his arms to get rid of any lingering chills.
"Rub your chest, Beast Boy. Your arms will take care of themselves," Robin advises, with the green teen taking the advice.
"I can't even feel temperature anymore, and even I thought that was too much," Cyborg comments. "It took me a half-hour to inspect my body for ice damage."
"I feel bad that the park of water is now closed for repairs," Starfire laments. "We were all having such wonderous fun there."
"Honestly, I'm surprised we weren't banned from that place, considering the fact that we apparently attract villains even on holidays," Raven states.
Two thuds nearby draw the team's attention. They turn and see the Mark 7 and Icebreaker, who have just landed, with each of them carrying a metal container.
Tony in the Mark 7 turns to Icebreaker. [Thanks for the help, Jarvis.]
[My pleasure, sir,] Jarvis responds from inside the white-and-gold suit.
[Dig in, guys!] Iron Man calls out as opens the container in his hands, revealing six boxes of pizza. The armored hero is quick to grab his own pie before the others rush over and grab theirs.
Tony steps out of his armor and joins his friends, pizza in hand.
"Sorry it took me a while to get this. I was at the prison for hours getting Donny situated in his personal cell, though it was kinda redundant considering his ice shell is harder than steel," Tony explains as he pulls out a slice from his box and chows down. "It's a good thing his cold sphere only has a certain radius, otherwise we'd likely have another Ice Age on our hands."
"Were you able to find anything interesting about his suit?" Robin asks in interest.
"Nothing that could lead to Slade's identity, if that's what you're asking," Tony answers, before looking thoughtful. "It does make me wonder, though. This Slade guy was able to afford upgrades for The Melter and Blizzard, a massive EMP bomb, and the potential hiring of the HIVE. Whoever he is, he must have some serious cash on his person."
"Not to mention he has knowledge of the supernatural given his ability to summon a Fire Elemental," Raven points out.
"So, this guy's rich, tech smart, and knows magic stuff? Sounds like one heck of a supervillain," Beast Boy says before wolfing down a couple of slices of vegan pizza. "Kinda cool, honestly."
"That's assuming that this Slade is the actual supervillain," Tony suggests, getting looks from the other Titans. "He could be part of a group of villains, or he could be the fall-guy for the real mastermind, whoever they are."
"Man, we could talk about 'what if' for hours and get nowhere. The only way we're gonna know anything for sure is if we catch the guy and get him to talk," Cyborg says.
"There's no if, Cyborg," Robin declares with determination. "We will catch Slade, and we will get answers."
"In the meantime," Tony interjects, "We'll shelve this conversation, take our win for the day, and enjoy the rest of Blorthog together."
"Sounds good to me!" Cyborg says with delight before devouring his pizza.
Robin simply nods and quietly eats his own pizza.
"I must say, despite the interference from the Blizzard, this has been one of the most wonderful celebrations I've ever been part of!" Starfire says with delight, two slices of pizza in her hands. "I thank you all for joining me in my first Terran Blorthog!"
Robin loses his intensity and smiles. "Thank you for introducing us to Blorthog."
"Yeah! We're so gonna make this a yearly thing!" Beast Boy declares.
"Totally!" Cyborg agrees.
Starfire nods before turning to Tony. "I especially thank you for organizing our celebrations. It warms my heart how hard you work to keep our friendship strong."
"Of course, I work hard on that. Taking care of my friends is the most important lesson my teacher ever taught me," Tony states, getting interested looks from his teammates.
"Your teacher?" Raven asks.
"Yeah. From my hometown in Japan. He was in the military before he started his teaching career," Tony explains before chuckling. "To be frank, he was a lousy teacher. He wasn't a jerk or anything like that, but he had little to no real teaching experience. I'm pretty sure that I was in his first class ever." Tony takes a moment to eat his pizza and gather his thoughts before continuing. "That being said, there was one thing he told me and my…classmates that really stuck with me. Something he picked up during his time as a soldier. He said, 'Those who abandon the mission are scum, but those who abandon their friends – even for the sake of a mission – are worse than scum'. It really struck a chord in me, ya' know? Like this sudden burst of epiphany…or whatever you call it."
Tony stops talking, and the other Titans take the silence to fully digest his words. Robin especially considers the words of wisdom from Tony's teacher.
Raven suddenly remembers something. "You know, you never did tell us about the friends you had growing up."
The other Titans perk back up at this.
"Yeah. What's up with that?" Cyborg asks.
Tony seems to flinch for just a half-second, before sighing and looking down at the sand below. "Right. So, the thing is, I didn't have a lot of friends growing up."
"Why not?" Beast Boy asks. "Weren't you rich?"
"I got my wealth right before I moved here to Jump City a couple years ago," Tony clarifies. "Before that, I was…more on the lower-class end, if you get my meaning. I wasn't really popular with everyone, especially considering the townsfolk were more superstitious than most people. I was considered a bad omen at best."
"Because of your whiskers?" Beast Boy asks in confusion.
"…Kinda," Tony answers vaguely. "Anyways, that superstition bled into the children from their parents, so most kids stayed away from me. I was, however, able to eventually make an extremely small group of friends and acquaintances. We'd hang out after school, watch the clouds, go out for ramen and barbecue, explore the land, go on adventures, be heroes…that sort of thing." A small smile of remembrance formed on his face. "They were my precious people. I would have given everything to protect them."
A sudden feeling of unease falls over the other Titans as they watch Tony's smile fall.
"What happened?" Raven asks in concern.
Tony slowly finishes the slice of pizza in his hand before answering, "There was…an incident that happened a few years ago. I was badly wounded, and after I healed, I decided that where I was living wasn't safe for me anymore. I moved away, leaving my friends behind."
Starfire suddenly gasps in horror. "No! You experienced the Rekmas?!"
Tony chuckles mirthlessly. "Yeah, I guess I did." Tony looks up at the group with a sad smile. "Maybe that's why I worked so hard to make Blorthog special. I suppose I'm afraid of going through another Rekmas – OOF!"
The sudden slamming into his chest knocks the wind out of him, and the following powerful hug from Starfire makes it hard for the air to get back into him.
"You absolutely will NOT experience The Drifting ever again! Our friendship will remain strong and happy and joyful! This I swear by X'hal!" Starfire declares with tears in her eyes as she squeezes the life out of the blond boy.
"…Can't…breathe…," Tony grunts as his face turns purple, getting Starfire's attention.
Starfire quickly releases Tony, allowing him to gulp down oxygen. "Sorry," she says sheepishly.
"Neither of you have to worry," Robin tells both Starfire and Tony. "None of us are going to be drifting apart anytime soon, if ever. I promise."
Tony smirks at Robin. "I'll hold you to that, Rob. I believe that promises should be kept."
Robin smiles back. "Same here."
With the mood lightened back up, the Titans happily finish their pizza dinner.
After a few moments, Tony speaks up. "Looks like it's dessert time." He looks back at Icebreaker. "Jarvis, if you would."
[Yes, sir,] Jarvis answers from the suit, which opens the second container, revealing metal skewers, bars of chocolate, graham crackers, and marshmallows.
The Terran members of the Titans instantly realize what's about to happen.
"Aw yeah! S'MORES TIME!" Cyborg exclaims excitedly as he and Beast Boy rush over to the crate and grab the supplies.
"Are S'mores a type of dessert?" Starfire asks as Cyborg and Beast Boy distribute the S'mores ingredients throughout the group, though Tony grabs his own due to him not liking things handed to him.
Robin brings up a marshmallow and a skewer. "One of the best types. You start by sticking the marshmallow onto the skewer like this, and then you hold the marshmallow over the fire to cook it until it's brown on the outside," he says as he demonstrates before her.
Starfire sticks the marshmallow on the skewer and holds the squishy treat over the campfire. "Like this?"
"Exactly. Just be careful that you don't catch the marshmallow on fire," Robin advises.
"GYAAH!" Beast Boy screams, getting everyone's attention as he desperately tries to blow out his flaming marshmallow.
Unfortunately, a particularly strong blow sends the marshmallow flying – right onto Cyborg's chest.
Cyborg takes a moment to regard the molten food on his recently painted chest before giving the green teen an angry and annoyed look.
Beast Boy chuckles nervously. "Uh, you gonna eat that?"
After a moment to clean up, everyone returns to their marshmallow roasting, with Raven using her powers in place of a skewer to cook her treat.
Eventually, the group gets to the assembly part, with Robin helping Starfire.
"So now you put the marshmallow on top of the chocolate and cracker, then put the other cracker on top and squish it all together, like this," Robin explains as he builds his own S'more.
Starfire follows the instructions as she builds her S'more. She then takes a bite out of the gooey concoction. She munches on the bite a couple of times.
She suddenly squeals happily as stars form in her green eyes.
"GLORIOUS!" Starfire exclaims with delight before devouring the rest of her dessert, with everyone else watching with amusement.
"Looks like we have a winner," Tony says as he eats his own S'more.
As the Titans finish their first S'mores, Beast Boy loads up another marshmallow and raises his skewer up in the air. "A toast – literally – to our new holiday! Happy Blorthog!"
The other Titans eagerly meet his skewer with their own (and Raven's magical marshmallow). "Happy Blorthog!" they all shout, marking a delicious end to a new Titans tradition.
[Insert End Theme: Teen Titans End Credits Theme]
AN: And cut! This wraps up the first of many Blorthogs to come!
For those of you wondering, This universe's Blizzard is Donald Gill, but he has Gregor Shapanka's backstory. This is so that I could use the version of Blizzard from Iron Man: Armored Adventures, who has the best design, in my opinion.
Also, you may have noticed the names of some of the places the Titans visited sound somewhat familiar. That's because in this universe, San Francisco was renamed Jump City after the Great Earthquake of 1906. I'm pretty sure that's what the Teen Titans writers were going for.
Now, I know what all you die-hard Teen Titans fans are gonna ask: "Hold on! What about the fight with Warp, and Starfire going to the future to meet the depressed and lonely future versions of her friends?"
I can't answer that question without a long rant about time travel, so for those of you who aren't interested in reading that, you can skip ahead.
Now, for those of you remaining…
(Cue the extremely long and deep inhale)
That future shouldn't exist at all! That's a future where the Titans didn't exist for almost four out of the five seasons, meaning they weren't around to stop a good majority of disasters that hit Jump City and the world, especially the planet-ending ones! And before you say, "ThE jUsTiCe LeAgUe CoUlD hAvE sToPpEd ThEm," where the hell were they when Slade and Terra conquered Jump City, or when Trigon tried to take over Earth, or when the Titans were globetrotting to beat the Brotherhood of Evil?! Not where the trouble was, that's for sure! Without the Titans, that Warp's technologically advanced 22nd Century wouldn't exist, which means that he wouldn't exist, which creates a Grandfather Paradox that could fracture all of reality! Sure, you could argue that an alternate reality would have been created which would spare Warp being "warped" out of existence, but there's still the problem of the world ending thanks to Starfire's disappearance, which wasn't truly a disappearance since Starfire succeeded in returning home with the Clock of Eternity! This means a completely different future would exist for Starfire to discover, which could also complicate the space-time continuum since she's definitely going to get a shit-ton of spoilers about her future! What if, when she gets back, she tries to change certain things for the better, only to make things worse and possibly trigger the apocalypse!? OR what if she succeeds, in which case, the future will change, which could change the information she got from the "past" future, in which case, she'd use the information from the "new" future to change more stuff, in which case, thenewfuturewillchangeand–
(Cue the massive gasping inhale)
…The point is, time travel is an extremely complicated sci-fi concept, and I'd rather not mess around with it too much in this fic.
…That being said, I've had an idea for Warp.
Post-Credits Omake: For All Time, Always
Location: Jump Museum of History
Time: Evening
In the dark and nearly empty room of the museum, a man with a black mustache and goatee wearing a hi-tech gold and black suit walks away from two frozen security guards. This is Warp, a thief from the 22nd Century who plans to travel through time to steal priceless artifacts, with his first prize being the ornate golden clock that's in the display he's approaching.
Warp smirks at his prize, not noticing the temporal disturbance next to him. "The Clock of Eternity. Valuable in the past. Priceless in the future. This is the beginning of a brilliant career for me."
"Actually, this is the end."
Warp quickly turns to the voice and finds what appears to be four humans in black tactical soldier uniforms facing him, with one soldier in the lead while the others stand behind her with their weapons drawn. The thief blanches when he sees "TVA" imprinted in the soldiers' chest armor.
"I-It can't be! The TVA?! You're real?!" Warp asks in horror. He's heard myths about the TVA, the agents who supposedly prosecute those who mess with the time-space continuum, but he never thought he'd actually meet them – especially during his first heist!
"On behalf of the Time Variance Authority, I hereby arrest you for crimes against the timeline of Universe MDC61652-1," the lead TVA agent states as she readies her own weapon. "Hands up. You're coming with us."
Warp scowls at the agents. "If you think for one second that I'm going to – GAH!"
The time traveler's tirade stops as a blast from another agent's weapon causes his suit to short-circuit, rendering all of his weapons useless.
"Last chance, criminal," the lead agent warns.
Warp growls as his frustration grows. 'All that time, all that work, all the struggles, only to fail at my debut?!'
"Get out of my way!" Warp demands as he charges at the agents, hoping to overpower them, grab their tech, and escape. Unfortunately for him, he only gets so far before the lead agent's baton swats his face.
Time appears to slow down to a crawl as Warp flies back from the hit, his jowls jiggling in slow-motion.
As it turns out, it's just him that's slowed down to a crawl, while everything else is moving normally, including the lead agent approaching him.
"You're now moving at 1/16th speed," the lead agent explains as she secures a collar around the criminal's neck, "but feeling all that pain in real time."
After a moment, time moves normally again for Warp as he falls to the ground. Dazed, hurt, and without his tech, it's easy for two of the other agents to drag him up to his feet.
"The criminal is secured. Let's go," the lead agent commands as she presses on a device, forming a glowing rectangular doorway of light to appear.
"No! You can't do this! This is my moment! MY DESTINY!" Warp screams as he's lead into the doorway by the escorting agents, with all three of them disappearing.
The lead agent turns to her remaining subordinate. "Take care of the guards," she orders before walking through the doorway herself.
The final agent points their weapon at the two guards and fires a beam at each of them. The now unfrozen guards collapse to the ground in exhaustion. By the time they recover, the final agent is long gone, leaving them to wonder what the hell just happened.
Welp, there's your Warp content, and now we have an introduction to the Time Variance Authority, though their function will be more like in the comics than in the Loki show. Cookies are available for those who figure out how this universe got its designation.
Next time, as the Teen Titans work to stop Slade and his schemes, Robin devises a plan to bring the criminal out into the open. Will it be a resounding success or a catastrophic failure?
Find out in the next installment of Iron Man: Titanic Adventures!
Until next time!
Dropareviewifyoucanflamerswillbeignored.