CHAPTER SEVENTY-SIX

Website where all photos of all outfits mentioned is on my profile. As a reminder, thank you mcmannusdixon for letting me know I haven't mentioned in a while. In my world ages are as follows: Jax & Opie are both 23. Donna, Al and Sarah are all 22, also in my world Otto was never VP. When Clay became president Piney became VP.

True to our agreement we don't talk about anything to do with the Club or any of the business ideas my brain has suddenly created an avalanche of. We eat our lunch talking about the house instead, Jax finally has a chance to listen to the plan I have of the pool and BBQ areas I want to get put in, the French doors I want to get put in the kitchen in place of the single door that's currently there. Jax points out that changing the doors means I'll lose some of the wall space in the kitchen but I shrug nonchalantly and remind him that I'm going to be using the room beside the kitchen for storage.

The cupcake that Jax brought turns out to be as bad as he thought, he can't force himself to have more than a single bite and looking at the way he struggles to swallow I shake my head when he offers it to me, in that silent interaction my thoughts of opening a bakery are solidified, Charming deserves decent pastries.

Glancing at my watch as we come down from the roof I'm shocked that we've been up there for over 2 hours. Jax has agreed that we'll have to do another quick trip to the flooring store to see if they have terracotta tiles like the ones on the upstairs balcony to cover the BBQ area and to do a block around the pool for some lounging chairs, even though he stated with what almost sounded like disgust that he'll never use them.

Muttering about having to fence the area in as well draws a distracted look from Jax as he waves to his mother, and opens my door for me. Rolling my eyes as I step on the running board "We'll have to fence it with a kiddie safe gate. Abel will walk eventually."

He nods and leans forward "Babe, please relax a little. You look like you're wound tighter than a string at the moment. Things will happen when they happen, you pushing and rushing isn't going to make anything hurry up."

I sigh and rest my forehead against his "I know, but I've said before I like being busy."

Jax kisses me quickly on the lips and steps back, waiting till my legs are in the car before closing the door. Climbing into the driver's seat a few seconds later he grabs my hand and rests it over the gear stick, putting his on top of it "I know you like being busy, but you'll work yourself into exhaustion."

I laugh "You know, Al said that to me a while ago, that I needed to calm down and let shit fall where it was gonna."

Jax nods "She's right. So for the rest of the day, I don't want you to worry about anything. Just think about me and Abel. Who we're going to see now."

I sit up a little straighter in my seat and nod enthusiastically, spending as little time with him as we have been has been hard on both Jax and I, it's only the knowledge that Gemma's been spending at least an hour a day with the little man that's made it a bit easier to get on with the stuff that needed to be done. The stop back at the flooring store is over in less than 5 minutes, they have an exact match for the tiles that are on the upstairs balcony and the same sales assistant that helped us that morning add that to the line of codes of flooring we've decided on.

We arrive in Abel's room just as Anne is working on getting him out of the incubator for his afternoon feeding. He's settled in Jax's arms, me being unable to have the pressure on my chest for the moment. Anne stays in the room while Abel practically inhales the formula in his bottle, we manage to spend most of the time talking about Abel and how he's doing, with it only being another few days till he's permanently out of the incubator he's almost as healthy as he would have been had he not had the complications caused by the woman that almost killed him.

Anne eventually asks about the freshly inked skin and Jax glances up from the one-sided conversation he was having with his son "It's to show the world that she's mine."

I poke my tongue out at him and turn to Anne "You've lived in town your whole life. Surely you know the symbolism behind the Crow tattoo's with the Sons. It's the ownership marking." I giggle a little "But I hate calling it that. Jax said it, badly; it's to show anyone that knows who I've chosen to spend my life with. But Jax's arm, well that's me."

Anne crosses the couple of steps and crouches down beside Jax carefully looking at the ink on the arm by Abel's legs before standing up again "I know what it meant, I knew what it meant when I asked. I'm not sure how much I'll see you guys after Abel's out of here, but if what I've observed of you, and the rest of your family that comes in, that baby has been born one of the luckiest on the planet. And not just because he survived what that horrible woman did to him. He has a mother and father who love him dearly, grandparents who can't go a day without seeing him and more uncles and aunts who would drop everything for him then most children do."

I smile and look over at Jax "He is a blessing and even if I didn't give birth to him he's my son and I will do everything in my power to protect him, from everyone."

Anne nods "Good, but remember to be good to each other as well. The love between you is so huge it's almost visible, it has been since the first day I saw you both here, don't take each other for granted, and as my mother said to me, never go to bed angry and remember to say I love you every day."

I smile again, this one a little wistful "My mother used to tell me and my father she loved us every time she talked to either of us on the phone. When I asked her once she told me you never know when the last time you'll talk to someone will be."

Anne nods as she opens the door "Smart woman your mother."

I nod once "She was."

Anne lets the door swing closed behind her and we hear her shoes squeak down the hall. Jax looks over at me and quietly speaks "You okay?"

I smile at him, the momentary feeling of sadness vanishing with the sight of Jax watching me and Abel's little hands waving in the air. "I'm okay. Just had a moment of wishing that Mom and Daddy were here to see you and meet Abel. They would have loved their grandson."

Jax carefully adjusts Abel before standing up and crossing the room, stopping right in front of me he uses his free hand and cups my chin "Babe, they love you, they love Abel, they think I'm a dick for not realising years ago what we could have had, but they love me anyway because I love you and I'm determined to make sure you know every day of the rest of your life how much you mean to me."

I giggle and lean forward so I can kiss the smooth surface of Abel's forehead, the smell of baby powder and fresh skin enough to brighten the tiny part of my mind that was still feeling down. "I know you love me baby, and I know that Mom and Daddy and JT and Thomas are watching us trying to make a life, trying to work out where we go from here and how we get to a place where Abel can grow up happy, healthy and safe."

Jax nods "We're going to make it Sarah, I promise you that. I will always look after you and Abel."

I poke his chest "And Doj. Who is probably wondering what the fuck happened to me."

Jax chuckles "Ma told me that he's settled in okay there but does sit by the door for an hour a day at 9am."

I smack my forehead "I used to take him for a walk every day at 9, he's obviously missing it. I'll have to start again Thursday. He'll be getting fat, cause I'm sure between the kids and Neeta they can't resist his brown eyes."

We stay at the hospital till just before 3 when I point out I have a hunk of meat in his fridge that needs to go in the oven if we want to eat any time before midnight. The nurses are in the middle of shift hand over so Jax and I both wave to Anne as we pass the office, the ride down to the ground floor is almost silent, the lift is full of nurses who've just finished so Jax and I stand quietly in the corner till we can be free of the mass of bodies that carry the distinct smell of hospitals.

The drive back to Jax's house is the opposite, Jax gives me a list of what vegetables are acceptable to have with a roast and each one he lists makes my eyebrows raise.

When he eventually looks over at me he shakes his head "What?"

I roll my eyes "Potatoes, potatoes, potatoes and peas are not four vegetables. It's 2. You'll get what I cook, if you don't like it, don't eat it."

Jax chuckles and puts his hand on my knee, massaging the top of my joint softly "I was kidding Sarah, you know I'll eat anything, well almost anything."

I laugh remembering the time that Gemma had tried to give him yams and his face had screwed up so much it looked like he'd sucked a lemon.

*I have an intense dislike of yams, something about the way they look I guess. Anyone else have a single food they can't stand?*