Stardate 2227.57

The smell of the meditation incense filled the air and entered Sarek's lungs as he took controlled breaths in through his nose and out through his mouth. Right as he thought he was reaching equilibrium he was hit with intense sorrow coming from Amanda that crashing down on him along with his own guilt and confusion. The strong emotions derailed him and propelled him into his racing mind.

The process of becoming allies with Amanda was becoming less likely after the events of today. His mind raced through his past interactions with her hoping to find an explanation or solution that could rectify what had occurred. It was jarring how he felt about her 5.4 days ago when he had end meal with Amanda and had a positive experience.

"Amanda, what is the place of your birth?"

She looked him straight into his eyes and there was a twinkle in her eyes that intrigued him.

"I was born in New Chicago, Illinois."

"Was your father stationed at the Imperial Starfleet base there at the time?"

"Yes, he was only a lieutenant commander and working in communications."

"And your mother?"

Amanda paused and shifted slightly in her chair,"She worked as an adjunct university professor."

"In what field of study?"

"In lingustics."

Sarek raised his eyebrow, "Just like you."

Amanda gave a sad smile, "Yes, she was my inspiration."

Sarek continued to question her, "Which institution was she affiliated with?"

Sarek felt a slight sadness grown in Amanda but she laughed regardless, "None other than the famous University of Chicago."

"I am not familiar with this university."

"It's a reputable university but not as prestige as others. My mom was happy to teach there, she loved working with students."

"What is her name?"

"Her name was Mary, Mary Grayson."

"You refer to her in the past tense."

There were tears in Amanda's eyes and she swallowed before she could speak, "Yes, she died over 15 years ago."

Sarek remained emotionless but continued to probe her, "You were an adolescent when she passed. How old were you?"

"I was only 9 years old."

"That is a young age. That is a formative year in the development of any sentient being."

Sarek was curious about Amanda's mother but he could sense she was closing off. She replied to him, "Mom was an inspiration for me when it came to linguistics. I used to resent her because she forced me to learn French when I was 5 years old, but I learned to love it like her. That's how I got on my trajectory in college," a sigh escaped her lips, "I really don't want to talk about her anymore."

Sarek paused for a moment but then continued, "I will not press you for anymore information in regard to her. I will note that most 5 year olds in any culture will go against their parents teachings."

Amanda's melancholy was replaced with intrigue, "Really? Even Vulcan children?"

"Yes, even Vulcan children. Vulcans feel emotions deeply, even more so than Terrans. Since Vulcan adolescents do not have full control of their emotions they are prone to outbursts, and bouts of disobedience."

Amanda started to laugh, "I cannot imagine you as a rebellious Vulcan child."

Sarek almost seemed amused and there was a look in his eyes that brightened them, and he saw Amanda give him a half smile that he found pleasing.

Sarek replied, "When I was 4 years old, I was discovered taking apart the main computer circuit of a hover cycle that was owned by my older cousin, Torin."

Amanda laughed, "I'm not surprised that a young Vulcan child would do something that tech savy."

"At the age of 4, I hypothesized how to reconstruct the main circuit to the rest of the hover cycle. I reconnected 2 copper wires to the engine in ports A and C and I reconnected the circuit to the base of the processing unit. I miscalculated and the hover cycle engine activated and it accelerated at 2.5 times it's normal speed out of the landing bay into the Forge of the Vulcan desert."

Amanda's burst out laughing, "That is unreal. How can a 4 year old reconstruct a main circuit to a hover cycle?"

"A 4 year old Vulcan child can learn many basic functions, but technical accuracy in mechanical engineering is one not fully understood at such an age."

"Do they have punishments for Vulcan children when they misbehave?"

"They do. My mother restricted my access to any personal PADDs and limited my time with our family pet. I then had to assist my cousin in repairing his damaged hover cycle."

A small chuckle escaped Amanda's lips, "I don't think a 4 year old would be of much help in that."

"I was not as helpful as my mother intended. I only damaged the hover cycle more in the process."

"In what way?"

"In a chain reaction of events, I managed to damage the alternator, and cause the hover cycle to explode."

"What! How were you not injured?"

"The event only occurred after Torin and I left the hover cycle. I had left a micro-spanner lodged into the middle of the alternator. The build up of energy caused it to explode."

"What did your mother do?"

"She decided to limit my access to hover cycles for the unforeseeable future."

"Did she succeed?"

"She was successful until I was old enough to legally operate a hover cycle."

Amanda lifted her brow and smiled, "Ah, so she was only able to keep you away from hover cycles until you were a teenage? Sounds like you were rebellious."

"There is a difference between rebellion and strategic prowess."

"Watch out, I don't think the Governor of Vulcan should say things like that."

Sarek spoke evenly, "It would seem the Lady of Vulcan has made grievous claims against me. I will have to report to the governor immediately for my thought crimes."

Amanda frowned but she continued to stare at him and recognize his attempt at humor. He was rewarded when a bubble of laughter escaped her mouth instead of a retort.

Sarek had discovered that he found illogical pleasure in her bouts of laughter and smiles. He wondered if he would be a witness of those expressions again if todays events were to be irreparable. He started to double down on his control of his emotions since he recognized that strange emotion was stirring in him about a week ago. He was governor now and had to focus on the success of Vulcan in the Terran Empire. Work had proven to be tedious with the various duties he was required to do. He had not received news on the Teachings of Surak in his office and the black drive remained unopened to his frustrations. It was after a day of long negotiations with the Minister of Trade and Thought about Project Satev-tukh that he returned home ready to quickly eat end meal with Amanda that the possibility of them becoming allies became less likely.

An hour earlier...

Sarek had walked through the doors of their home after Saya and Tevak gave him an update about their operations as the bodyguards to his family.

"Sarek! Welcome back. How was work?"

"Greetings, Amanda."

Sarek immediately saw Amanda had cooked something. His curiosity was piqued, and he tried to hypothesize what she had cooked based on the smell. He found that he was unable to find something conclusive.

"Amanda, it would seem you have made end meal."

Amanda brightened and smiled at him and the strange feeling was back in his chest. He repressed it and took control of his emotions. They were friendly but he did not completely trust her yet.

Amanda spoke, "Yes, I did! It's plomeek soup! Zhi'rev gave me a recipe after I insisted on trying to make end meal tonight."

Sarek titled his head slightly. The meal did not smell like plomeek soup but tried not to dismiss it given the fact that there were different variants of plomeek soup based on region.

"I would like to eat what you prepared for end meal."

Amanda beamed at him and he could not help but follow her to the kitchen and to the table they would sit around. The closer they approached the table the more he could see the meal that Amanda had created. The color was completely off instead of a red it was closer to a purplish brown. He lifted a brow and sat down. He hesitated to eat as he watched Amanda consume the mystery liquid in front of her.

Based on Amanda's facial expression he could tell that she was not pleased with his reaction. Sarek found that Terran expressions were helpful in understanding where they stood on issues or emotionally. Something he did not realize would help him in his day-to-day talking with various officials through out the Empire. He looked at her lips when she spoke and then to her eyes, "Is there something wrong?"

"This is not plomeek soup."

Amanda frowned and her brow creased. Her eyes looked slightly agitated, "I followed the instructions that Zhi'rev offered me. She assured me this was an authentic recipe that would taste better than what a replicator could produce."

"I will need to look at the recipe. Hand me the PADD with the information on it."

"Sarek, just try it first. I don't see why you need to look at the recipe this instant."

"I only want to confirm which ingredients you added to the soup."

"That can wait. Just try it first."

Sarek looked at her for a moment and realized he would not see the recipe until he had tried the mystery liquid in front of him. He took his spoon and dipped it into the substance. He then put it to his mouth and it started to tingle in a chemical sort of way. He paused and lowered his face to bowl to be rid of the substance. A thought occurred to Sarek in that instance and he wondered if Amanda had sought to poison him.

Amanda's reaction was that of aghast and anger. He was sure that she was angry because her attempt at assassinating him was unsuccessful.

"You have put a substance into this liquid that is not safe for Vulcans to ingest. One that could result in hallucinations or even death if enough of it were ingested. I could not decipher the smell initially but I now understand that there are traces of lichen in this."

Amanda frowned, "You think I was trying to kill you? Plomeek soup is suppose to be easy and simple even to Terran standards. Wouldn't this also kill me? Why would I try to kill the Governor of Vulcan? "

"Lichen is harmful to Vulcans but not Terrans. Perhaps you have attempted to poison me to free yourself from your current situation as my bondmate."

Sarek was feeling anger and he was having a hard time controlling it. His face remained phlegmatic but his internal turmoil was overtaking him. Amanda stood up and looked at him, "I'll get you that recipe if that will prove my innocence!"

Amanda left the table and grabbed the PADD from the kitchen shoved the PADD into Sarek's hands. He looked at the recipe it was normal and included all the standard spices and ingredients. If the recipe was considered standard why is there lichen in the soup?

"This recipe is standard. That does not prove that you did not add lichen into the recipe. Where are the ingredients that you used to make this meal?"

Amanda retorted, "Are you kidding me? You don't believe me do you?"

"I only believe in concrete facts and evidence, Amanda." Sarek was immovable and looked at her coldly.

Amanda stood up, "Come here, Sarek," he followed Amanda to the counter she prepared the food, "Look."

Sarek looked at all the ingredients there were traditional spices and the plomeek. He then saw the lichen. A strange emotion of betrayal filled him but he maintained controlled and turned to look at Amanda. She was a Terran and it was logical to assume that she intended to cause harm to his life.

Sarek pointed to the plant, and turned to look at the traitor in the eyes, "This is lichen."

Amanda looked at the purple colored plant, "Sarek, this wasn't there earlier. I'm telling you I did not put it in the soup."

"The evidence is proving the opposite."

Amanda's frustration was bubbling to the surface to the point that her voice cracked when she spoke, "I did not do it. I don't know why I have to prove to so many people that I'm innocent of the charges they hold against me. As my husband shouldn't you trust me?"

Sarek knew in that moment that any trust he had in her was gone, "No I do not."

Amanda had some water appear in her eyes but they did not fall, "Really? Even after getting to know each other better?"

"Trust is not easily gained."

Amanda looked at him hard, "I see well. It would seem I do not trust you either. Not when at one moment you seem so calm and pleasant and the other you are cold and cruel."

"I find that your emotional insults are illogical in helping you with your defense."

"Illogical? How many times must I hear the l-word everyday from your mother and everyone around me? Don't you dare say that I am the one over reacting in this situation and that I'm not being logical. I have come before you with the truth and you can either take it or leave it. I refuse to go back to prison because of a crime I did not commit. I will not do that again. Wouldn't it be logical to investigate this fully before you say it was me who did this?"

Amanda motioned with her hands to the poisonous plant, "Why don't you talk to Saya and Tevak and look at any security footage from around the house?"

Sarek did not trust Amanda, instead he wanted to prove that his assumptions were correct. He pulled out his COMM, "Tevak, this is Governor Sarek."

Tevak's voice came through the "Governor Sarek, what can I do to serve you?"

"I want to you to look at the security footage of this home over the last 42 hours. There are traces of lichen in the kitchen. I need you to discover who placed this item here as quickly as you are able. "

"Governor Sarek, I will summon a healer. I will go look at the archives."

"Since I did not ingest the substance a healer will be unnecessary. Tevak, check where Amanda was located through out that time period, as well as, any other staff."

"I will do so, Governor. I only wish to serve the Terran Empire."

"Tevak, send for Saya to come and give Amanda surveillance until the security footage is processed."

"I will do so with haste."

The COMM ended, and Amanda looked upset. She spoke, "You requested Saya so she could babysit me?"

"You are not an infant and do not need to be watched over as one. You are being monitored until the footage is processed."

"Same thing." Amanda frowned.

Saya had arrived quickly through the front door and approached Sarek and Amanda, "Governor Sarek and Lady Amanda, you requested my assistance."

Sarek stepped in, "Saya, you will need to monitor Amanda's every action until Tevak has finished processing the security footage. Lichen had been found in the house."

Saya raised her brow, "There has been an assassination attempt on you? I will find whoever did this and bring them to justice for the Terran Empire and all of Vulcan. Tevak and I will double our monitoring of the residence and increase security measure. We must limit the probability of this occurring in the future. I will protect you and Lady Amanda at all cost. There are punishments the perpetrator must face."

Saya proceeded to pull out a dagger from her leg as she made the speech.

"Logically that is what you are employed to do. For now I require you to monitor Amanda."

"I only wish to serve the Empire, Governor."

Saya made the Terran salute to Sarek and he did so in return and immediately turned on his heel to leave. It left no time for Amanda to defend herself.

Sarek made his way to the security room located on the fortress. A large mass of a Vulcan was sitting in the middle of the room. Tevak was filtering through various holovideos and scanning through security credentials to and from the fortress and the Governor's quarters.

"Have you discovered anything, Tevak."

"There has been no unusual activity that I can detect except here," Tevak paused one of the videos, "it would seem someone has removed part of the video file in the kitchen of your home. It was only an hour and 35 minutes and 22 seconds ago, but from that time slot 2 minutes and 4 seconds are missing from the log. "

Sarek raised his brow, "Computer, where is the missing security footage?"

The computer responded, "No file is detected to be missing."

Sarek looked at Tevak, "The security protocols on this fortress are higher than the Hall of Thought in Shi'kahr. Only an experienced data engineer could remove such information with no trace."

"I concur. I see no other unusual activity."

"Computer, show me the location of Amanda an hour, and 36 minutes, and 4 second ago."

A holovideo appeared and it was of Amanda in room on a PADD. She looked concerned and cried for a moment. It was strange to see her cry. Something in Sarek twisted. She was not the culprit. According to the archive of footage she had made the plomeek soup in the kitchen earlier in the afternoon. Someone had tampered with it after she had made it. Sarek had falsely accused her of a crime she did not commit. He felt hesitant to trust her but he would not feel guilt for acting logically in the moment.

Tevak looked at the governor, "I find it logical to investigate the whereabouts of all the staff at this time."

"Continue to analyze the footage, Tevak."

Slowly they made their way through the staff that to see if any one of them could have crimes charged against them. Zhi'rev, Tevak, Saya, and even his mother were all busy with other task at the time. No one was guilty.

"Tevak, I find it...unsettling that the fortress' security has been breached. I will need you to increase security and surveillance of my quarters. I do not know who would seek to assassinate me. I have enemies named and unnamed in the Terran Empire. I do not know if T'Latya has planned this or if the Ak'spar is behind this, but I will need you to investigate this further and find the missing footage and whoever used the lichen. If you need to hire more special forces or call in the Imperial Starfleet for assistance I will approve you to do so."

"Your safety is my top responsibility. I only wish to serve the Terran Empire. I will not allow this assassin to go unpunished."

"Your employment or life will be at risk if you fail, Tevak."

Sarek was surprised by his words, but they were necessary as the Governor.

"I will not fail. I will comm Saya and relay this information."

"That is agreeable. I will leave now."

Tevak stood up and gave the salute as Sarek left the room. As Sarek walked back he felt the swirl of emotions in them and looked forward to the relief that meditation could provide. His emotions in regard to Amanda were becoming increasingly hard to navigate and more turbulent. He had falsely accused Amanda of a wrongdoing but he had acted appropriately in the moment.

Sarek entered his quarters and saw Amanda and Saya in the common space sitting at a table. Amanda looked right at Sarek with zero emotions. It was surprising to him.

Sarek spoke, "Saya you may leave now. You will be busy with surveillance and security planning with Tevak."

Saya left with no word just the salute. Sarek stood by the door for a long moment as Amanda looked at him silently. He was unsure of how to handle a situation like this. He waited for Amanda to speak. After a few minutes she sigh.

"Saya told me that video footage was missing from the security holocams. She said no one at this residence was responsible for the lichen. The only probable things were something about your cousin and the Ak'spar?"

"That is correct."

"You have nothing else to say to me?"

"I do not."

"Really?"

"You fully grasp the situation as Saya explained it to you. There is nothing left for me to comment on the matter."

Amanda's brow creased. She kept her voice even but there was seeping anger from her lips, "That is surprising given the fact that you accused me of trying to poison you. I'm your wife. Why would I put myself in that kind of position? I don't wish to have you killed. That would be an automatic death sentence for me. You revere the Teachings of Surak and logic but the thing with you Vulcans is sometimes you don't fully follow them."

Sarek felt strange hearing her admission, "That is a misjudgment of the culture of Vulcan. Vulcans have found more peace through logic and the Teachings of Surak than Terrans will ever obtain."

"Sarek, this is not about the culture of Vulcans. This about your superiority complex over me because you are Vulcan and I'm a Terran. It's obvious you blamed me because I'm the only Terran of your acquaintance."

Sarek raised both his brows, "It can be argued that Terrans have a superiority complex over all other species in the Empire. "

Amanda almost rolled her eyes, "This is not a debate about which race is superior. This is about the fact that you need to apologize to me for thinking it was my intent to kill you."

"My actions were done with logic in the moment and I do not see a reason to express that I was in error."

Sarek was waiting for another angry response from Amanda but she was silent and looked at the ground. For some reason the silence was more unpleasant than her loud words.

"You know I was really hoping we could at least be friends, but I see you don't even respect me enough to offer an apology for something that was wrong. Maybe we really can't be friends. I hoped so but you obviously do not value me as a sentient being. Yes, I am emotional. Yes, I have trauma. Yes, I can't calculate things as fast of you, but that does not mean that I am not intelligent or capable of great things. You and everyone else here treats me like a child. I know we have different lifespans, but maybe there are some strengths that I have that you don't."

Sarek stood there not knowing what to say. Something in him twisted and he had a hard time suppressing the unknown emotion. She had finality in her eyes that Sarek did not understand but it unsettled him nonetheless.

Amanda spoke, "I'll keep training to be the Lady of Vulcan, I'll go to whatever events I need to, but I feel it best we avoid each other for now."

With that statement she turned on her heel and walked away to her room. Sarek stood there for a long moment before he found himself in his room trying to meditate. He could feel her emotions of sorrow. He had caused her emotional pain and he did not find pleasure in the act. He acted logically in the moment when he discovered the traces of lichen. He saw his error now. It was strange interacting with a human woman. He did not know how to communicate properly with her. He wished he could mind meld with her. He pushed the thought away. He had too many traitorous thoughts to have her even peer into his mind. He could never fully trust her. The fact that she was not a natural telepath did play into his favor. He had enemies in the Terran Empire, the Ak'spar, T'Latya, Selek, and those unnamed. The probability of Amanda being one of those enemies was relatively low he realized. Guilt filled him as he felt the pain Amanda was in.

He struggled to meditate for the remainder of the night while he listened to Amanda's sobs slowly die down as she drifted off into a restless sleep.

Author's Notes:

It's always one step forward, and two steps back with these two. Next chapters is in the works and I hope to share soon.