The moment Lucy had seen that Erza and Juvia were being tended to properly in the medical keep aboard the Christina, she and Happy had done an immediate about face and ran towards the same bay doors they had come in. Gajeel and Lily were quick to follow her, while Wendy and Carla stayed to provide first aid to the wounded. Elfman took it upon himself to explain everything that had happened to Alzac, the poor sharp shooter confused and baffled by the sudden appearance of a large ship in the sky. They didn't stick around for the retrieval of Ichiya and his men after their battle, nor did they expect everyone to wait for them. The only thing she made sure to do was leave Zeref's book with Carla, strictly telling her not to open it. Not even waiting for an answer, she and Happy flung themselves from the Christina without a second thought. Lucy just knew she had to find Natsu. Before it was too late.
The first clue she had to his whereabouts was the column of smoke climbing its way into the sky.
"I thought Salamander wasn't supposed to use his magic or something?" Gajeel shouted to her over the wind.
The fear pounding in her heart kept her from answering him. As Happy jetted himself in the direction of the carnage, Lily and Gajeel shared a look before they followed. The smoke was too thick to make a safe landing nearby, scattered into a gray haze that filled with air with an acrid stench that even Lucy could smell from a mile away. The thick canopy of Juniper Hills barred their entry even further. Gajeel had to hack away at the dense foliage for more than a minute before they broke through. Lucy hit the forest floor running, Happy gliding along right behind her as they barely stopped to wait for Gajeel and Lily. The darkness of the forest hardly helped Lucy navigate through the thick trees, but luckily Gajeel was there to direct her by scent.
"Hang on, blondie!" Gajeel called out as he skidded to a halt, nose raised to the air. "I'm getting Gray's smell, too. But there's…blood, and lots of it. He's been hurt, badly."
Lucy's poor heart couldn't beat any faster as her mind quickly assumed the worst. Had Natsu attacked Gray? Was he still alive?
"Can you find him?" Lucy pressed. Gajeel nodded once, then took off in a slightly different direction with Lucy and the exceeds following.
When they found Gray, his legs were sticking out between the roots of a tree. He wasn't moving. He face was clammy and pale, his facial hair and lips caked with a small amount of blood. The ground was wet with half-melted ice, as well as a dark-brown stain that trailed away from Gray's body and pooled in an alarmingly large area. As Gajeel and Lucy gently maneuvered the man out from the tree, she quickly recognized the stained jacket tied around Gray's torso. Lucy tried not to cry with relief – Natsu wasn't the one who had done this. There was still hope. Gajeel tenderly lifted up the cloth and peeked under.
"Just as I thought. Burned closed." Gajeel looked up at Lucy, a short burst of coughs interrupting him. "Probably saved his life, but we should get him up to the Christina."
Lucy blinked down at Gray. She had a pretty good guess for what had happened, but it still didn't answer her most crucial question – where was Natsu?
"Salamander's that way," Gajeel stated with a pointed finger. "We'll see to Gray, you go collect your loser boyfriend."
Lucy nodded, muttering a thank you to the dragon slayer and Lily as she and Happy took off once more through the forest. Clambering over roots and the uneven ground consumed Lucy's energy, her damaged lungs desperately trying to keep up with her needs. Happy huffed as he flew beside her, his wings twitching with effort. By the sounds of their breathing, it would have seemed like the two of them were having asthma attacks. It surely felt like it. But there was no way either of them were going to allow themselves to stop until they found Natsu.
The first thing to hit her was the smell.
Not just of smoke, but also the fatty, sickly-sweet stench of burnt meat. Even Lucy could smell it well before she fully came upon the scene. The air was practically infused with the aroma. Next came the sudden rise in temperature, like she had passed through a curtain of heat that prickled her skin and clung at her hair and clothes. The trees became black and the ground crunched beneath her feet. It was only when Lucy was standing on the edge of the epicenter of the carnage that she finally heard the crackling of burning wood and the frustrated huffing of some beast.
Except there wasn't a beast – there was only Natsu.
Through the smoke and the sparks and whatever else might have been in the air that Lucy didn't want to think about, she and Happy could see him hunched over the forest floor on his hands and knees, the wet sounds of his labored breathing mingling in the air. His scarf was missing, giving Lucy a full visual of his bruised and scratched torso. His hair hung in his face, shadowing his eyes from her. It didn't seem like he had noticed them arrive. Lucy was speechless, watching her fiancé without saying as word as a muscle spasmed in his neck, jerking his head to the side violently. Happy tenderly laid his soft paws on Lucy's shoulder as he got very close to her ear. His entire body was shaking with fear.
"Lucy, look." His voice was barely a whisper. When she turned her head to look at him, she saw that the blue exceed was not looking at Natsu, but at the scene around them. "Look what he did."
Lucy cast her eyes to the ground. Her racing heart finally stopped.
Bodies littered the forest floor. Too many to count. All of them burned to smoldering husks, but still definitely humanoid in shape. Without hair or clothes, it was hard to distinguish individuals. Within the featureless planes of their charred faces, the gaping hole that used to be a mouth was frozen into a wide silent scream, gray teeth glinting in the fire light. Blood rushing through her ears and pounding in her head, Lucy thought she might faint. If not for Happy grounding her to the spot, she most likely would have. Her mind felt loosely attached to her body, like she was in a dream and couldn't wake up. Trapped in her nightmare, Lucy couldn't help the small sob that escaped her lips.
Natsu snapped his head up, baring his teeth and growling at the intruders. Standing up to his full height, Natsu stalked towards Lucy and Happy on unsteady feet. Across Natsu's stomach, a smear of darkness cut from his left hip to the bottom of his ribs. At first, Lucy thought it was a wound from a sword or a knife that a mercenary must have landed on him. A bloody hunk of metal laid on the ground behind him, warped out of shape and charred. But then the open wound burned, glowing like raw lava from within the dragon slayer. Lucy could feel the primordial heat on her face, smoldering like a brand. Black ash coated Natsu's arms, his elongated fingers sharpened at the tips. Black-tinged flames flickered in and out of life across his shoulders. But what scared Lucy the most were the deep, tar-pitch eyes that glared at her from the face of her beloved. Her knees buckled and gave away beneath her, helpless to do anything but crumble before Natsu.
No, she thought. This wasn't Natsu right now. This was E.N.D., fully awakened.
Lucy tried to remember what Natsu had told her, that the only difference between the two of them was the kind of magic he used. How he was still there, just not himself. That was becoming harder and harder to believe as the demonic personage that she saw right now loomed over her. Natsu wasn't this, he wasn't fire and smoke and darkness and death. He wasn't this living weapon. And yet, when Lucy fearfully gazed back into his eyes, unable to look away, there was a spark of something familiar hidden away within them.
It was intelligence. E.N.D. was not a mindless animal that caused destruction out of random. He knew what he was doing, Lucy realized. He knew that he had killed, and while it was unclear if he enjoyed it or not, one thing was absolutely certain: he was more than willing to do it again. E.N.D. leered down at her, his face streaked with ash, muscles twitching and breath huffing. If the demon had recognized Lucy or Happy for who they were, it didn't seem that he cared. His clawed fingers twitched, the char cracking apart. A snarl, low and primal, rumbled through his chest. Lucy wanted to scream, but the heat and the fear had stolen her voice. She felt like a rabbit cowering before a wolf. He cocked his head slightly, regarding her with an air of annoyance. There was no amount of words or intimacy that was going to save her this time. Natsu was already too far gone. Sneering at the girl before him, E.N.D. raised a hand, fingers curled into claws and ready to slash.
With a sudden burst of speed, Happy dashed in front of Lucy, spreading his wings and paws wide to shield her. The exceed was unyielding, unwavering as the deadly blow came down on him – and suddenly stopped, E.N.D. retracting his claws and leering at Happy like he didn't know what to make of him. Despite his incredible show of bravery, Happy was shaking so badly, it carried into his voice when he spoke.
"I'm not gonna let you hurt Lucy, Natsu!" The exceed screamed. "You'll hate yourself for the rest of your life if you do!"
Something changed on E.N.D.'s face, a slight quirk in his lips and a small lift in one of his eyebrows. It was like Happy had said something strange. Only now was it glaringly obvious just exactly how weak the demon had become. He could barely stand, knees trembling under his own weight. His skin was covered in sweat, soaking the waistline of his pants and dripping down the sides of his face. His unused arm hung limply at his side, and the wound on his stomach was bleeding sluggishly. He favored his left side, clearly in a lot of pain. His black eyes wavered in and out of focus, like he was fighting off the urge to faint. As E.N.D. gazed down at the two of them, his lips curled down into a frown. Lucy and Happy could barely believe their ears as E.N.D. opened his mouth and spoke.
"Hate myself?" His words were perfectly coherent, though his voice seemed deeper somehow and laced with a growl. With a sneer on his lips, he continued. "Why?"
Lucy and Happy were both in too much shock to provide an answer. Neither of them had known that E.N.D. could talk – he certainly hadn't said anything three years ago – and his alarming amount of comprehension had caught them off guard. They weren't given a chance to recover.
E.N.D. snarled as a metal beam shot over Lucy's head and rammed him square in the chest. Flying backwards across the ground, he hit the forest floor hard and lay stunned on his back. Gajeel and Lily leapt in front of Lucy and Happy, neither of them hesitating to advance. The demon roared at Gajeel from his spot on the ground. The dragon slayer faltered ever so slightly before he pinned Natsu back to the ground and knocked him out with a swift, well placed punch. His body went limp on the charred earth, a small spatter of blood flying from his nose. Gajeel stood up quickly and stepped away from Natsu. His expression betrayed just how confused he was. Looking over to Lucy, Gajeel swallowed.
"We got tired of waiting for ya," he explained. "Thought that maybe you got jumped by some Manticore guys."
Lucy said nothing, her gaze stuck on Natsu's prone form. As she watched, the char on his arms flaked away to reveal red, raw skin underneath - burned right down to the muscle. The wound on his abdomen lost its fiery glow, revealing a wound so deep, Lucy thought she could see the brownish-pink flesh of his organs. The burning had kept him from bleeding out, but now he had other, more serious problems. E.N.D. had destroyed his own body. But Natsu was still breathing. Gajeel took one quick look around, taking in the carnage with one hand gripping at his short black hair.
"I'm not sure what the hell happened here, but something tells me I don't want to know," Gajeel muttered to himself.
"Seeing Natsu like this is very… troubling, to say the least. However, I must insist that we get him and Gray back to the Christina immediately," Lily suggested, remaining cool under pressure like always.
Lucy and Happy finally shook themselves from their stupor, rising and approaching Natsu's limp body. A bruise was already forming on his chest from where Gajeel had hit him. He probably had a cracked sternum, at least. But he seemed normal, for the time being. Gajeel and Lily turned to go retrieve Gray while Lucy and Happy inspected Natsu. Gajeel paused for a moment before he left.
"By the way, I found this." The Iron Dragon Slayer reached into his jerkin to produce the white-scaled scarf, miraculously whole and untouched.
Lucy gratefully took it, thanking Gajeel once again. Kneeling by his side, Lucy leaned over and carefully wrapped the scarf around Natsu's neck. Seeing him with his scarf finally relieved the tension in her body, the familiar sight of her fiancé wearing it somehow confirmed that things were going to be okay. That was when Lucy spotted something that she had missed before, and it troubled her deeply. One hand reached up to his head, her delicate fingers carding through his hair. She thought it might be ash, but it didn't come away with her fingers. Within the rose pink of Natsu's messy hair, on the left side of his head right above his ear, was a single lock of black, dark as pitch.
Everyone gaped at Lucy and Happy, their long and troubling story sinking in. After Lucy and Gajeel had returned to the airship bearing Natsu and Gray, Elfman, Alzac, and the men of Blue Pegasus helped carry them both to the same medical room that kept Juvia and Erza. As Gajeel laid Gray on a bed, Wendy rushed over to him, instructing Lucy to place Natsu on another. Lucy had hesitated, however, uncertain whether the comatose man limply draped across her back really was the Natsu they all knew and loved. After what she and Happy had seen, there was no way they weren't taking precautions.
They asked for a separate room for Natsu, on a bed with restraints.
That was when the questions started. They had no choice but to answer them.
Lucy kept her gaze down, to her hands wringing themselves in her lap. It had become unavoidable at this point. There was no way to reasonably explain what Gajeel had seen, or how Natsu had come to be so badly injured. So, coming clean, Lucy had told them all everything, starting from the job request with the Leviathan. None of them had even known what Natsu was. Very few people were privy to that knowledge to begin with; Laxus, Gray, Erza, and Porlyusica to name most of them. Mirajane and Freed only recently – and now Elfman, Alzac, Wendy, Gajeel, and their exceeds could be added to the list. Sitting on the chair by Natsu's bed, Lucy sheepishly waited for somebody to react. One by one, their gazes switched from the woman and cat to the man lying on the bed. Lucy was glad she had waited to tell them about Natsu's condition until after Wendy had treated him. She might not have otherwise.
"Everybody always called him a monster," Alzac muttered. "But I never would have thought…"
"Please, don't think differently of him because of this." Lucy said quickly, trying to avert their thoughts. "He's still the same Natsu, and he would never intentionally hurt any of us. He's just... going through something right now. But we're going to fix it.
"Tell that to those Manticore guys." Gajeel grunted. He ignored the questioning looks his words received.
Lucy felt her anger rise. "Natsu was trying to protect Gray! You said so yourself, Natsu saved his life. He didn't have a choice!"
"Lucy, if you're so certain that he isn't going to hurt us," Wendy spoke up, her expression a mix between scared and angry. The bandage over her ear already had spots of red. "Then why is he in shackles?"
Lucy started, but frowned as she realized she didn't have a good answer for the girl. Happy sat on the bed with Natsu watching everyone's reactions anxiously. He had always feared that people would hate Natsu if they knew what he was. Looking back to his friend as the silence carried on, Happy's heart sank at the sight of Natsu in restraints. His arms and legs were entirely bandaged, an ointment to soothe his skin dampening the cloth. His stomach was likewise bandaged. There wasn't much they could do about his cracked sternum. He wasn't a monster, Happy pouted. He didn't need to be caged.
"I'm not an idiot," Lucy stated sourly. "I know that this is best for him and all of us until we find out how he's feeling when he wakes up."
Wendy scowled, unsatisfied with that answer, and left the room without another word. Gajeel, Lily, and Alzac followed her shortly after that, expressions solemn.
Elfman was the only one who spoke to her. "Don't be too mad at them, Lucy. They'll come around eventually. You've just…given us a lot to think about."
Lucy smiled sadly up at the large man. "Thanks, Elfman. I hope you're right."
As he turned to exit as well, Carla approached Lucy. In her paws was the book Lucy had given her for safe keeping. The white exceed hardly said a word or looked her in the eye as Lucy retrieved the tome from her, then abruptly turned away and followed after Wendy.
Alone in the room, Lucy and Happy gazed at Natsu's sleeping face. He seemed so peaceful and normal, it was hard to believe that not twenty minutes ago, he had been a being of chaos and destruction. She sighed as she looked down at the book in her hands. How had it come to this? It hardly seemed fair that Natsu was practically reliving the worst days of his life. This damn book shouldn't even be here. But, thinking along those same lines, neither should Natsu. Fingernails digging into the leather of the book, Lucy felt hot anger rising in her chest the same moment tears pricked her eyes. The painted words of "HOLLOW" had been scripted onto the leather so skillfully it was almost beautiful.
"Lucy?" Happy squeaked as Lucy abruptly stood.
"I'll be right back."
Happy watched her as she too, left the room. Happy turned back to Natsu, ears drooping in sorrow.
"We really need you right now, buddy." He mumbled. Natsu didn't respond.
Lucy made her way through the airship down into the hull, where the giant combusting lacrima that fueled the magic of the Christina blazed in a large iron stove. The sheer amount of magic power that sustained Christina's ability to fly also produced a large amount of heat, a simple reaction that took place just like with any transfer of energy. Lucy approached the plasma-heated stove, Zeref's book clutched in her hand. As much as she hated to admit it, Lucy was getting tired of being hot. Bad things seemed to happen whenever she got hot, lately.
The one or two Blue Pegasus members that were maintaining the output of the lacrima watched her as she knelt down before the boiler, as close as she could get to the purple tongues of pure energy that flicked in and out of the air flow reliefs. Squinting her eyes against the bright light and gusts of heat, Lucy placed the book on the floor in front of her, the scorched back cover crackling. With a quick shove, the book slid across the floor, thumped against the hot metal, resting in front of the vent. It only took a moment for the magic to catch ahold of the book and take to flames. Lucy watched as the pages puffed up and the leather cover cracked apart, blackness spreading over the book and blending into the ink. A sense of relief washed over Lucy – one less thing to worry about.
Huffing a sigh, Lucy stood straight and exited the boiler room. The cooler air of the hallway just outside was refreshing, and she took a deep breath of it. There was one more thing she wanted to do before she went back to Natsu's room.
It was dark in Juvia, Erza, and Gray's room. When Lucy cracked the door open, the only source of light was a single lacrima shining dimly in one corner of the ceiling. Erza was stabilized, her breathing steady but still raspy. She seemed to be resting peacefully, one hand in a splint and her scarlet and silver hair tied off to the side. Lucy smiled sadly at the sight of her friend, but when she looked to the bed next to hers where Gray should have been, she was surprised to see that the bed was empty. Stepping into the room, Lucy switched her gaze to the last bed, where Juvia laid motionless, a thin sheen of sweat on her brow. Gray lay against his elbow next to her, one had carding through her blue hair with a solemn expression on his face.
Lucy smiled as she approached. Gray looked up when she spoke quietly.
"You know, there once was a day where she would have woken up from a coma and crawled into bed with you."
Gray shook his head with a smile. "Don't remind me. Thank goodness she's chilled out since then."
Lucy pulled up a chair. "How are you feeling?"
Gray huffed a sigh through his nose. "Like shit, but it's better than being dead, I guess. The cut was clean, so it was easy for Wendy to heal. Somehow, I didn't bleed to death. I heard I have Natsu to thank for that."
Lucy nodded, her theories about what had happened with Natsu confirmed. It was good to hear that Natsu had risked his life and humanity for a friend instead of just being reckless. For a while, the two of them sat in silence. Gray was staring down at Juvia, but his gaze was a hundred miles away with thoughts. Lucy was the same way, her mind occupied with questions and concerns, the main one being: what do they do now?
"He's back, isn't he?" Gray asked suddenly. "E.N.D.?"
Lucy didn't respond, but that seemed to be enough of an answer for Gray. The Ice-Make mage hummed in thought.
"I figured. As soon as my devil slayer magic came back, I just knew." His left arm flexed as he spoke. "Tell me everything."
Lucy didn't hesitate, launching into the same story she had just a few minutes ago, minus some details that Gray already knew about concerning the war three years ago. She told him about the Leviathan, and what Natsu had told her regarding the difference between him and E.N.D., she told him about the near-incident Natsu had with his etherious a couple days ago. Finally, she told him about her encounter in the woods, how weak E.N.D. had been, and how he had spoken to her so non-chalantly. Gray, however, was not as surprised by this as she had been.
"We spoke to each other, way back when," Gray explained. "Had an…almost intelligent conversation. Did I not tell you about that?"
"Did he recognize you? Know who you were?" Lucy asked quickly.
Gray half-shrugged. "Well, yeah. When he wasn't trying to kill me, Natsu was calling me by name and telling me to get out of his way. What Natsu said makes sense – it's still him in there when he's E.N.D., but he's different. It's almost like… like he doesn't know the difference between right and wrong, or he doesn't care. All he does seem to care about is if you're being a nuisance."
Lucy's eyebrows scrunched together as she processed this new information. Gray had been able to put into words what Natsu could not. There was more to it, Lucy thought. The difference between Natsu and E.N.D. wasn't simply a difference of magic – he lost his moral compass and any regard for human life. There was a name for people like that, and it left a sour taste in Lucy's mouth to have to associated it with Natsu; a psychopath… like Zeref.
"But now there's something bugging me," Gray said, capturing Lucy's attention. "I was told that all of these etherious beings have a natural instinct to destroy Zeref. They can home in on him like a beacon. But, now that he's gone… what's going to become of Natsu?"
Lucy started at that, remembering hearing something similar from Mavis. But before she could respond, the door to the room opened once more to reveal Ichiya standing in the hall. The man locked gazes with Lucy and gave a small bow.
"Beg your pardon, Miss Lucy," he said in his silky voice. "But if you wouldn't mind, there's something you really should see. You too, young Gray."
They shared one look with each other before they got up to follow him. Ichiya led the two towards the rear of the ship, where he passed through a heavy steel door. On the other side was a long narrow passage lined on both sides with barred cells. Lucy and Gray looked around in wonder. They had no idea that a place like this was on the Christina, but it's purpose was clear – they had taken someone prisoner.
"As soon as we land in Magnolia, we were going to turn him over to the magic council." Ichiya looked over his shoulder. "But I thought you might like to have a word with him, first."
Ichiya stopped in front of one cell, crossing his arms as he glared at its single occupant. Lucy and Gray peered into the cell, grimaces of disdain pulling across their faces. Marlow didn't look up from where he sat on the hard floor, hands bound behind his back. His halberd hung on the wall outside the cell, out of his reach. His jaw was bruised a deep purple from where Natsu and Gray had hit him.
"I have nothing to say to the man that tortured Juvia," Gray hissed. "I hope he rots in jail."
With that, Gray turned away and receded back down the hallway. Lucy and Ichiya watched him go.
"I only did that because Konza made me."
Gray froze, the other two switched their gazes back to Marlow. The mercenary still didn't look up, but continued to speak.
"She ordered me to do it, on pain of death." Marlow sighed. "You might not believe me, but I didn't enjoy it... Konza didn't use to be like that. She used to be kind."
Nobody said anything. It was difficult to muster up any sympathy for the man. He finally looked up, meeting gazes with Lucy. His eyes were sad.
"And then we found that damn library, and everything changed." Marlow said
Lucy's breath caught in her chest.
"What are you talking about?" Gray asked before she could. "What library?"
"We heard about it through the network of dark guilds. Never thought we would actually find it." Marlow shook his head. "It was guarded and trapped. We only managed to get away with a few books. I had no idea who they belonged to until it was too late."
He was being vague on purpose, only giving them enough information to keep them interested, but the implications of his words were immense. A library? There was an entire library filled with Zeref's books out there somewhere?
"How long ago was this?" Lucy's voice was low, fearing that she already knew the answer.
Marlow quirked an eyebrow at the question. "I'd say about four months ago."
That was when the Leviathan had first appeared. It must have manifested when they opened the book. Lucy cursed under her breath.
"Why are you telling us all this?" Gray narrowed his eyes in suspicion. Marlow peered at the other man, taking in the bandage around his chest.
"She got away, didn't she?" The sneer Gray gave him was answer enough. "I thought so. Konza's always been good at that."
"Get to your point already," Gray spat.
"My point is that she's not going to just give up and go away." Marlow adjusted his jaw, wincing as it gave an audible click. "And that your friend – Natsu, was it? – is in danger."
Lucy and Gray stiffened. Ichiya was watching the scene carefully without a word. Lucy had a feeling the Manticore master wasn't talking about E.N.D. being the danger. Marlow continued.
"If you want to save him, you'll need to find her." Marlow looked up at them with an expression that was almost pleading. "And for that, you're going to need me. I'm the only one who knows what she's planning and how to find her."
"Since you're in such a sharing mood, why don't you just tell us?" Lucy asked, not the least bit hopeful he actually would.
"I'm not an idiot. You might throw me in jail, but I know you'll be back for me the moment you realize that I'm right." Marlow leaned back. "And I'll be waiting."
"Dream on. Let's go Lucy." Gray scowled as he once again turned and walked away.
Lucy hesitated, staring at the man behind the bars more closely. She was usually pretty good at reading people, and something told her that Marlow wasn't really as cruel and mean as he tried to make himself seem. That wasn't enough to quell the small bit of hatred she harbored for the man, and so she too turned and left with Ichiya following. As they all left the holding area, Marlow's deep voice carried down the hall after them, his words sending a chill down Lucy's spine.
"You can't save him."
A/N: At last! I hope what I'm trying to get across makes sense - if not, please let me know and I'll try to clear things up.
EDIT: This chapter has been edited for content and grammar on 8/21.
As always, read, review, and enjoy!