Author's Note: I find myself taking some time into finishing up this year and moving forward. While I'm not quite sure how long this chapter will be, I really want to show that I am for finishing this and evolving this farther than just the books. (I think it will be short because of the fact I want to wrap it up and move on to the other book). Again, I'm really looking for a beta, so if someone is offering I would love it.

Chapter 45: Moving Forward

Few believed him. As Harry lay in bed, he couldn't help but grow more and more frustrated about it all. He had told the Minister about what he saw, and even though he was telling the truth, Minister Fudge merely said that it was shock talking. He knew the moment that he had mentioned the name of Malfoy, no one would trust him. And he was right, Snape immediately jumped into the conversation demanding he retract his statement. Looking back at the situation it was clear that he should have shut up and just let them go, but he couldn't.

Instead he went on and on talking about people's names and what he saw and more importantly that Lord Voldemort was alive! He had always thought of Fudge as a kindly figure, a little blustering, a little pompous, but essentially good-natured. That opinion sure changed the moment once Fudge grew angry and grew self-centered. The most important point that went through Fudge was that it would disrupt his ordered world.

Only Headmaster Dumbledore supported him, and Professor McGonagall fought for him and he couldn't help but be relieved in that sense. At least some people of power believed him. The more shocking part of it all was when Snape turned on Fudge and showed him the past. Harry had that image burned into his mind.

Flashback…

Snape strode forward, past Dumbledore, pulling up the left sleeve of his robes as he went. He stuck out his forearm and showed it to Fudge, who recoiled.

"There," said Snape harshly. "There. The Dark Mark. It is not as clear as it was an hour or so ago, when it burned black, but you can still see it. Every Death Eater had the sign burned into him by the Dark Lord. It was a means of distinguishing one another, and his means of summoning us to him. When he touched the Mark of any Death Eater, we were to Disapparate, and Apparate, instantly, at his side. This Mark has been growing clearer all year. Karkaroff s too. Why do you think Karkaroff fled tonight? We both felt the Mark burn. We both knew he had returned. Karkaroff fears the Dark Lord's vengeance. He betrayed too many of his fellow Death Eaters to be sure of a welcome back into the fold."

End Flashback…

That mark he had seen during the attack, and more importantly during the return of Voldemort would forever be stuck in his mind. He had so many questions, so many ways of interpreting it. But he didn't want to dwell on it. He wouldn't. Merlin everything hurt. He groaned audibly as he felt a shot of pain run through him. Closing his eyes he pressed himself against his pillow and sighed.

"Drink the rest of your potion Harry" Mrs. Weasley nudged. "You have a good long sleep. Try and think about something else for a while…think about what you're going to buy your winnings!"

At her comment he looked away. They didn't understand it did they?

"I don't want the gold" he said in an expressionless voice, "You have it. Anyone can have it. I shouldn't have won it. It should've been Cedric's"

He looked up and blinked back the stinging sensation. He wouldn't cry in front of them right now. He ignored the way that Hermione and Ron stared on, as well as the rest of the Weasley's. He wanted to be alone.

"Let's give Harry some time alone" Sirius said aloud.

Harry turned to see him on the doorframe and he couldn't help but he grateful for his godfather being there. Mrs. Weasley was going to protest loudly that is until she really took note of Harry's disposition. Shuffling out everyone followed her, only Sirius and Harry remained.

"Do you want me to-"

"Yes" Harry interrupted.

Sirius walked over and before Harry could really explain what was happening he was pulled into a hug. It was the kind of hug that made him really feel safe. Sirius' body was bigger than his and the way he held him made him think of the way his father would probably have held him. He closed his eyes tightly as the images of his father circulated in his mind. He had seen them; his mother, his father, and even Cedric helping him at the end. Love. They had talked about love and he couldn't help but start gasping. His body shook and he pressed himself against Sirius hoping to disappear.

….

Angel wiped her tears and took a deep breath. She felt so selfish; completely selfish at the fact that she sat there crying over her own misfortune over Harry's situation. But it was this realization that had made her cry. She had no one to really share how worried she was. Pansy had abandoned her; for a good reason too.

That's why it stung more than anything; she was absolutely right. She didn't care about how Pansy could have been struggling, or how lying to Draco was becoming harder for her friend, yet easier for Angel. And poor Harry; she couldn't see him. No matter how much she wanted to be with him, the thought that her secret being out, trumped being beside him. She was a horrible person. But she wasn't ready to sacrifice everything. The conversation with Luna popped into her head and she covered her face.

This was all so horrible. She couldn't comfort Harry even if she wanted to. What could she say to him? Nothing. She could do absolutely nothing to make him feel better. She was useless. In her spiral she had failed to notice that she was no longer alone in the room.

"Are you alright?"

She jumped in surprise and saw Remus looking at her in a sympathetic expression. She quickly wiped her tears and nodded. This was embarrassing. She didn't dare look at him in the eye in fear of tearing up again and showing him just how selfish she was.

"Yeah"

Remus in turn knew that the girl was not; from the red eyes and her slouched posture he knew that she was struggling with all of this. The weight of all of this fell hard on children and it was even more of a struggle with her position of it all. She couldn't go off and seek Hermione or Ron to share their sorrow over Harry's misfortune. She couldn't curl into her mother's arms and confess how she was feeling like Ginny could. In fact the secrecy of it all brought more weight of it all. Walking closer he saw how she tried to look even smaller as she sat on the desk.

"You know…it's alright to not be…alright" he struggled with his own wording.

Despite Remus' awkwardness she smiled. Her eyes filled with tears in knowing that he was trying. He didn't have to try and comfort her, he was wasting good time he could have helped Harry.

"You don't have to you know" she sniffed, "waste your time on me. I don't deserve it."

He shook his head and instead dragged a desk over to sit in front of her and smiled sympathetically. He reached over and grabbed her hand patting it lightly.

"You're not a waste of time, you're my goddaughter" he squeezed her hand. "And you deserve more than this miserable old coot can give you"

She laughed softly and felt more tears falling at the sweet man's words. She knew how he was supposed to have raised her, and was supposed to have brought her up with love and support and all those things they believed she lack.

"I-I'm okay I swear" her voice cracked.

Remus was not too experienced with dealing with children, sadly never having one of his own. But the way she cried made him want to help. She didn't have to go through this alone, and her stubbornness only made it worse. Pulling her over he wrapped his arm around her shoulder and held her as she cried.

"I-I shouldn't be crying" she sobbed, "I'm so a-awful. You should be with Harry, he needs you so much right now."

He shushed her softly and helped her release it all. She was very vulnerable and she thought no one cared. Angel gripped his shirt tightly and hid her face against his shoulder in embarrassment. She cried and she didn't want to feel this way, she didn't want to be this weak. But she couldn't help it.

"You need someone now, and then we can both be there for Harry" he said with more assuredness than he believed.

"Can we?" she asked after a while.

He pulled back and smiled softly. She was red all over; her eyes clearly showed her crying, and her cheeks red from how she rubbed her face all over. Her hair was in disarray and he noticed her clothes were covered in dirt from her comforting Harry.

"Why are you crying?" he asked softly changing the conversation.

She wiped her tears and took a deep breath.

"I-I'm not good at this." She began, "All of this. Harry he-he suffers so much and it's not fair. I want to be there for him. I want to push through Mrs. Weasley and all of those redheads and hold him close and tell them that I care for him too. He's so good" she cried softly, "he is so sweet and kind and he doesn't deserve to have people die. And I'm a horrible person, because I'm crying because I can't be there. I can't give up so much just to push through and be with him. The consequences…my family, it's too much." She sniffed, "I can't tell Draco everything like I used to. I'm not good for him."

Her last phrase ended very softly and Remus felt for the girl. He rubbed her arm softly and sighed wondering what the hell he would tell her.

"The moment he's happy, everything breaks down" she sniffed. "And damn it, I can't just fix things. I'll make it worse because how can I promise to be there when…when I'm lying"

This was heavier than he imagined and Angel was shocked at how she'd basically exploded. She wasn't even crying anymore, her verbal explosion had done well to end that. And there she sat in an abandoned classroom, pouring her insecurities and anger to her professor.

"You're young" he began unsure of himself or where he was going, "and it's okay to not know everything. At your age…I was just worrying if I could pass potions" he laughed softly. "It's okay to be selfish sometimes, because you can't help how you feel, but you keep saying you care about Harry. No one is asking you to sacrifice everything. And no one should, especially not you. If Harry ever does….well just send him my way"

Angel smiled softly and wiped her tears. He was trying so hard and she could see that.

"I know that…I'm not technically your godfather, but I see you as my goddaughter. If you need anything even just to talk...I'm here. And I love Harry too. But if it's something that might go against Harry, I'll tell you my opinion for what's best for you. You matter too. So it's okay to cry. We can both cry. But then we wipe our tears, get ourselves together and go help Harry. Because if Sirius is there he might ruin things"

That earned a laugh from her and he grinned in return. In this moment she could see why Harry loved them so much, and maybe why her mother loved all of them too. She slowly got up and looked down at herself.

"Go shower" Remus said softly, "I'll be waiting outside the Hospital wing and I won't go in until you show up"

She found herself appreciating Remus more and only could nod before running off. She wanted to thank him, but the words wouldn't come to her at the moment. Instead his words made her realize that she could be stronger if she tried. Running through the people that were still sharing gossip, she managed to go through the common room without a hitch. She ignored the people trying to ask her what she saw and instead she found herself running to the showers and getting ready.

...

That was probably the shortest shower she had ever taken. She barely brushed her hair and dressed before rushing downstairs. Her hair was still wet and somewhat dripping down her back as she reached the Hospital wing. She was about to turn the corner when she noticed that people were exiting and waited until it was clear to head towards Remus. They said nothing but as soon as she was beside him, he opened the door.

The scene before them made her heart hurt. Sirius held Harry as he finally release all the pent up emotion. Her own eyes watered at the thought of how Harry had suffered this year. She didn't want to interrupt, but as the door closed behind them with an audible click, the men in front of her pulled back. Harry immediately began to wipe his eyes and murmur a string of curses and apologies as he tried to get himself together. Sirius looked the same way as he tried to compose himself.

Sirius looked at Remus who signaled him to move to the side and give them some privacy. He was reluctant at first, seeing Harry's state. He knew that his godson needed some time to really release his emotions and he thought Angel was too young to be able to cope with all that could be said. Yet as he pulled away Harry immediately looked towards Angel, who looked a bit embarrassed at this situation.

She would have loved to run towards Harry and hold him, but the idea of doing that in front of her father was embarrassing. Remus took note and pulled Sirius to the other room allowing the two teens to be alone.

Her shoes seemed to make so much noise as she walked towards Harry's hospital bed. It surprised her how unsure she was to approach Harry. She took in the way his green eyes were bloodshot red and how pale he looked. It made her stomach drop at how the whole night had taken a toll on him. He said nothing, but he didn't have to.

Smiling softly, she sat down on the edge of the bed not yet turning to face him. He tilted his head in confusion but soon realized that she was crawling towards him. As she sat beside him, she leaned against the pillows she turned over and wrapped her arms around him.

Harry looked down at her and she only kissed his cheek waiting for him to talk when ready. She knew he needed some quiet time, and she wouldn't rush him. She didn't want to coddle him, nor did she want to chatter about. 'I don't even know what to say' she thought to herself as she held him. Harry smelled of cheap generic soap, and she didn't like it. His glasses were off making his pain even clearer in his eyes; and the bandages on him made her just want to hide him from everything. She closed her eyes and simply held him holding back her own pain. She wasn't going to cry, it would only make him feel bad.

Harry didn't know how to feel. He was so embarrassed at being caught crying by his girlfriend. But it had felt so good to just have some relief and just let out his tears with Sirius. He hadn't felt judged and had felt better if only for a second. He knew when Harry felt overwhelmed and helped him by pushing people out of the room. And finally he could breathe. He buried his face against his girlfriend's hair and took a deep breath. He felt calmer especially when she simply held him. She had no expectations of chatting and he appreciated her so much or it. He kissed her forehead softly and she hummed snuggling closer. One thing kept repeating over and over again and he found himself saying it:

"Mrs. Weasley asked me what to do about my winnings" he said softly.

He was expecting Angel to say something or criticize Mrs. Weasley for her comment but instead she snorted. Something in him twisted and he found himself half smiling only to have laughter bubbling up. Soon he chuckled softly and she laughed softly alongside him at the idiocy of it all. Their laughter soon died out and Harry found himself feeling horribly about all of it. The winnings should have been Cedric's. He hugged her tighter and she said nothing only clung more.

"It's my fault he's dead" he whispered.

"Oh…Harry" she said softly already starting to try and comfort him.

"No...just…just let me talk" he pleaded.

And so she did. She let him talk about how he'd told Cedric to take the cup. He continued to talk about how Cedric had told him he deserved to win, and that he'd wait for him. His insistent to take the cup together brought his downfall. He also talked about the moment that the light was gone from Cedric's eyes. Tears began to fall down his cheeks but he didn't say anything instead he kept talking about Cedric.

"Harry, you wouldn't have known," she murmured softly as she sat up to face him.

She wiped his tears and kissed his cheek softly hoping to comfort him. He merely closed his eyes and shook his head. No matter how often he heard that it didn't mean a damn thing to him.

"I saw them…the Death Eaters…Voldemort" he began.

She shuddered softly and that's when he realized the names that were said. Looking at his girlfriend he wondered if he could say it. How would she feel if she found out her father supported the man that killed so many innocent people? Would she even believe him?

"Harry…you don't have to.."

"He named them…your…Mr. Malfoy was there" he said suddenly, "and Crabbe, Goyle, and Wormtail was there too"

He felt her pull back completely as if his words had stung. And they had. Angel looked at Harry with disbelief. Why would he say something so hurtful? Why would he bring her family into this? There had already been so many arguments over his comments before. About their blood purity, about how they were Voldemort supporters, and bad people in general. But despite it all they had an unspoken agreement about not talking about it. She wanted to just tell him to stop talking before he ruined this, but she couldn't. She didn't want to start a fight; she didn't want to blame his emotional state over this.

"Harry…" she warned, "I don't want to talk about those things. I want to be here for you."

And that's when Harry knew that he was not going to get a word in edgewise. She didn't want to hear it. She wouldn't listen and he in turn wouldn't push her. He loved her and he knew she cared for him, but she made it clear that this line would not be crossed. She loved her family and he wouldn't ask her to choose between the two.

"I saw my parents" was what he said instead hoping to change the conversation. "they protected me against Voldemort, they…they told me they loved me" he said.

He lowered his gaze and stared at his hands. He hadn't told Sirius that because he knew that it would have stung his godfather too much. In turn Angel knew that the change of topic wasn't for the better it was to avoid an argument. She was ashamed for having him shut down the topic but she knew it was for the better. She only placed her hands over his and held them.

"They'll always be there you know" she said softly, "I know…I know my mother loved me." It had been weird to say 'mother' when not talking about Narcissa. But she knew that Amorette had loved her. It was clear based on what she'd talked to people about. The pictures of her mother showed her how much she had loved Sirius too and how much he'd loved her back. A union like that made her know how much they had loved her.

"And while I never met her, I know that she loved me. And my love for her grows the more I hear about her. And how can they not love you Harry…you were made from love and live on from love" she added on softly.

He had nothing to say not wanting to start blubbering like some idiot. Instead he pulled her close and kissed her cheek softly. She snuggled against him and he found himself dozing off. The day had been long and exhausting in every way shape and form. And he knew that this would be one step forward. While he hadn't shared everything that had happened the night, he would, one day.

….

Her boots clicked down the hallway as she got out of the hospital wing. It had taken almost three weeks but Harry was out of the Hospital Wing. Ever since the tournament and Cedric's death, the hallways tended to be filled with mourning. Cedric was loved by many and was one of those students that had left an impact by simply being a good student. Harry hadn't spoken about anything that happened during those moments ever since the first night. The first week he spent most of his time sleeping. The cut had healed, thankfully, but he still had bad migraines that were attributed to Voldemort. She shivered at the thought of saying that name even in her mind. Harry slowly talked about casual things the second week. If anyone brought up that night he would shut down and just pretend that he was alone. At nights, an hour before the curfew would happen, she would visit a bit and they would chat.

They didn't talk about what he said about her family. She wasn't going to poke more information. Instead they simply just chatted about everything and nothing and they were both comfortable. They didn't discuss their relationship, but they knew something had gotten stronger. They knew that they cared for one another and they were loyal to one another but it seemed now they were also becoming friends. Ever since the dance it seemed that they were on better terms, especially emotionally. She was supportive than all of his other friends and he appreciated that in more ways than he could vocalize.

Her thoughts deflated as soon as she saw Cho Chang. While the girl wasn't her favorite person, she felt very bad for the girl. For someone who was admired for her beauty and brains, Cho looked like she was clearly mourning. Her hair lay flat, lifeless and her skin was sallow and her lips chapped. Angel had noticed that the girl didn't eat and many would come to give them her condolences only for her to cry. Angel had yet to do that and she found herself feeling like she needed to say something. The idea of losing someone she cared for, especially the way Cedric had was saddening. If Harry had died…she wouldn't know what to do. Walking towards the older girl she looked shyly and found herself looking right into her eyes.

"Chang…I just wanted to say that I am very sorry for what happened. I know you cared…for Cedric very much. " She moved her hair behind her hair and looked uncomfortable realizing what she was doing, "I know I'm not the friendliest person, but I am really sorry"

Cho's eyes filled with tears and she nodded gripping the strap of her bag. Angel wasn't going to expect anything, thus she kept walking, and her face burning in shame for realizing her bad temperament might have made her comment sound insincere.

...

One Week Later…

As she reached her dorm she closed the door and sighed in relief that she wasn't going to have any conversations. She was tired of having to explain where she was and what she was doing. Usually her cover would have been Pansy but it seemed everyone knew they had had a falling out. It was embarrassing how Pansy's passive aggressive nature spread the news. If anyone asked she acted stupid and they left her alone. She missed Pansy. She missed knowing what was going on in other people's lives and more importantly she had no one to really talk to. She missed the plans that Pansy had made for them during break.

"It doesn't matter" she muttered to herself as she began to pack.

And it didn't because Luna so lovingly stepped up to the plate. She was the first person to come over to her and murmur if she wanted to take a walk with her. She had taken the offer too tense to stay within her own group. Once they were alone she cried to Luna who in turn cried with her and promised she would be her excuse, her support and anything she needed.

'Why are you doing this Luna?' she remembered asking. "You're getting nothing out of this"

" I'm not doing this for a reason other than it's about time that someone is there without an ultimatum"

That had shaken her to the core and she thanked the Ravenclaw for her reasoning.

As for Harry...she didn't even bother hanging out with Harry after he got the green light, she knew that the trio would be reunited and that was more important. There was not an ounce of bitterness in her statement; she just knew that they missed him too. Thus she found herself trying to be productive and just heading home. She missed her mother and she even missed her father who had grown colder with her in the year. Funny how things had changed in one school year, and saddening how she was most grateful that no one she cared for had died.

…

The train ride was awkward. Where there was once natural conversation, now loomed a heavy silence. It was a forced silence that much was clear based on the way that Pansy pursed her lips. Pansy's body language screamed tense; her arms were crossed as were her legs; her back was straight and pressed deeply on the compartment couch. Her eyes gazed at nothing in particular out the window.

Angel shook her head and went back to her book. She was not going to attempt to make things better. She had tried once, only to be openly mocked by Pansy by pretending she didn't hear her. That would never happen again. So she forced herself to reread the same page again before forcefully turning it. If this was a test of patience she was definitely going to beat Pansy.

"You're not even going to try?" the older girl screeched.

Angel slowly lifted her gaze from her book and raised her brow, pretending not to have a clue as to why she was saying this.

"Don't give me that look! I can't believe you aren't talking to me Angel. I thought we were friends!"

That's when Angel took off her reading glasses, closed her book and looked at Pansy with a serious expression.

"If I recall, you told me that you were done with all of this. So I'm trying to do what you told me. What about that makes you angry Pansy?"

Pansy's cheeks reddened in anger. Since when did Angel actually do what was asked?! The one time she shouldn't have, there she was ignoring her. Pansy Parkinson was too important to be ignored; especially by someone who had done her wrong. She leaned forward and took the book.

"You don't want me as a friend then?!"

Angel huffed.

"Look I'm not like Draco, those tricks don't work on me alright? I respected your wishes and you chose to walk away. You were my best friend and I respect you, so if you were just throwing a tantrum I suggest you get over it. I've seen way too much these last few weeks to have you just beg me to succumb to what you want."

Before Pansy could say anything, an explosion, bright lights and more importantly cries caught their attention. Immediately the compartment door was open and Blaise looked wide-eyed.

"We got trouble, they've gotten themselves hexed"

Angel shook her head and rushed off with Pansy to see what kind of trouble their friends got into. While it wasn't perfectly healed, it seemed that they were back to their usual. And as Pansy began to yell at the Golden Trio, there trailed Angel, hoping to just head home and see what summer would bring.