I'm sorry for the long wait. i'll try to publish more chapters soon :)

'Andy i saw him holding your hand. Please tell me he didn't put you as his emergency contact because he is the guy you slept with during our seperation.' Robert had to know. 'Robert i'm sorry but yeah he is...

Andy tried to grab Robert's hand but he didn't let her instead he looked at her with hurt and shock written all over his face. Never in a million years did he think that the guy she slept with was his boss. The boss who treated him and the team like crap. The guy who always looked at him with a smirk, at least now he know what that was about. 'Andy, how could you? Why didn't you tell me this earlier when i asked if you slept with Gibson or Ruiz?' Robert started rubbing his face out of frustrated. 'Robert, i'm sorry. I know it was wrong, it happend in the moment. I felt guilty ever since it happend, I told you this before.' She tried to hold his gaze but he looked away. 'But Andy it did happen and you should have told me that you slept with him! You didn't sleep with some random guy you met at the bar. I would still be hurt but not like this. You slept with another firefighter who also is MY boss. How can i trust you when you keep hiding things for me?' He felt anger burning inside of him. For the fact that Beckett had used his wife when she was most vulnerable but also the fact that Andy didn't tell him before.

'Robert please let me explain why i didn't tell you.' Andy started to feel helpless and tried to make contact. 'I really thought we got to the point of no more secrets when you told me about the miscarriage and that you slept with someone. Andy this is a big thing to hide. Are there any other things still hidden waiting on me to find out. I keep on trying to stay considerate because you went through a lot and i love you but you keep playing with my feelings, you keep hurting me more and more.' Robert took a deep breath and stood in front of her with his hands on his hips frustrated but mostly hurt. He tried to calm his voice and continued talking 'Did you even plan on telling me or were you waiting on me to find out myself? How can we take steps forward when you are not willing to open up and stop hiding. You made mistakes we both have but in a marriage you're supposed to share. Why can't you be honest? At this point I feel like i'm the one who truly is invested in changing as a couple. By hiding you act like a teenager. I'm not your father but your husband. We need to talk about our issues. I don't even know what else to say. Why him? ' He started to walk away 'Please I... Robert there isn't anything else. I promise you!' Robert turned towards her and let out a sarcastic laugh ' Are you sure because i don't even know what to believe anymore. It feels like i'm getting hit blow after blow by things that happend the last 10 months..' Andy started tearing up, once again she hurt the one she loves because of her own mistakes. Why did she wait, if she had told him before he wouldn't be this mad would he? 'Robert can we please talk somewhere that isn't a hospital waiting room?' She tried one last time. 'Andy i need a minute..., i need a minute okay!' Robert walks to the door and exits the building getting to his car. Leaving a broken Andy behind alone in the hospital with Beckett. He started the car and drove home.

A few minutes Andy stood frozen looking at the door. How the hell did she manage to mess up their marriage even more. She got out of her thoughts when she felt a hand on her shoulder. 'Herrera! i thought it was you. Why are you in the hospital are you okay?' Meredith asked concerned. Andy looked at Meredith and started venting not making much sense 'I got a call from the ER so i came here but then my husband and i got into a fight and i might have truly ruined my marriage for real this time. I hurt him so bad, what i did was wrong, so wrong . Why do i keep self destructing the best thing i have. How the hell am i gonna be able to fix this!' Andy started hyperventilating. 'Herrera focus! One bleeder at a time. Come with me.' Meredith grabbed her arm and walked into a empty hospital room and grabbed her some water. 'Tell me everything start with the call from the ER, who got injured?'

She began telling the whole story. 'Robert and i have been seperated for almost a year but finally we decided to go on a date again. We just found a therapist and made an appointment to work on getting back together. We've been having such a difficult time lately so Robert thought it would be good for us to have a night out.' Andy stopped and smiled at the thought of the Robert's look filled with love when he asked her to go on a date. 'While we were getting ready i got a call from the ER that Robert answered. His captain the guy i had a one night well afternoon stand with got injured and i'm his emergency contact.' Andy sat down in one of the chairs and started bouncing her leg before continuing. 'After the call we hurried to get here, both confused of why i am his emergency contact. Robert did know i slept with someone during our seperation but not that it was his captain. Well i think me sitting her alone tells you what happend.' She let out a nervous laugh. 'He figured it out, i hurt him so bad i just couldn't tell him about the miscarriage' Her voice was laced with emotion. Before this week she hadn't told anyone about it. Everytime she talks about the miscarriage now she feels like she hears the Obgyn say that they can't find a heartbeat. She took a deep breath and continued. 'and that i slept with another men and that the man was his boss in one day. I thought it was too much for him too handle. But i think it was too much for me to tell and i realized that was selfish. It will sound weird but if i don't talk about something it doesn't fully feel real. I guess even while trying to stop hiding i still tend to hide the things that will hurt me the most. I was planning on telling him at therapy mostly so we had to have this conversation and no one could leave. The fact that i keep trying not to hurt him and keep the pain away because he has been through enough ends in some twisted way up in me hurting him even more then i could ever imagine.' Andy stopped talking looked around int he almost empty room and took a sip of her water. Meredith saw the hurt and struggle Andy was carrying and started talking 'I'm sorry Andy, that's a lot to deal with. Did i hear that you had a miscarriage?' Andy nodded 'I have my own experience with hiding my pregnancy and miscarriage and told my husband later. If your relationship is strong It will get better, the way i hear it now he needs some time. You dropped a lot of bombs on him. Give him some time to cool off and get your own head straight. Make sure that when you go to him you have your story straight and are ready to fight. Do whatever you need to do to start move forward together. That also means no more secrets, spill them all if there are still some left.' Meredith smiled 'It will be allright i'm sure, the fact that after all this time he is still here with you means he loves you like crazy. Also i might have heard something from Amelia my sister.' Meredith winked at Andy. 'She told me how much he loves his wife. I didn't realize at first that it was your husband. Don't doubt the connection you have!' Andy had calmed down a bit during her speech and gave her a teary smile. 'Thank you Meredith, i feel like i'm on an emotional rollercoaster and start losing it sometimes. It's just so much.' she let out a sigh. Meredith got paged 'Herrera i'm so sorry i need to get back to my patient can i walk with you to the ER? Maybe i can get some information about your husbands captain. What's his name.' They started walking towards the ER 'Beckett, Sean Beckett.' After arriving to the ER Meredith walked to get some information about Beckett and got back to Andy. 'So his injuries are minor he has some bruised ribs and a concussion but he will be fine.' Andy nodded. 'Meredith thank you again, for everything.' 'Anytime Herrera, us badasses need to stay fierce together. I'm so sorry for the way your pregnancy ended if you ever want to talk with someone who went to a similair experience you know where to find me. I have to run now, good luck!'

Andy looked through the window to Beckett. She regained herself and walked into the hospital room. immediately she saw him smirking at her. That smirk alone made her stomach turn. 'So you finally ended your marriage didn't you? I saw you fighting in the waiting room. Now you don't have any more reasons to deny my offer and get a drink. I know you enjoyed our afternoon just as much as i did or maybe even more' He winked at her. 'And since you can't get any from your husband or should i say ex husband? you know you're always welcome for some adult entertainment.' Beckett smirks at her. 'Beckett there are a lot of places i can make you hurt. Don't forget you're the one in a hospital bed after a car accident under the influence of a lot of painkillers. If you piss me off any more i'll accidentely push on those bruised ribs and i can tell you that i will enjoy it. Just so you know the afternoon with you was meh, i'm used to better it was just something to get me to stop hurting for a while, well turns out that backfired. So will you please shut up and tell me when you can go home?' Andy gave him her best 'lieutenant' stare. 'Damn Herrera the fight with your man turned you fiesty i like this side of you!' I was told a nurse would get here soon. I just have to sign some papers and i'm ready to go.' Andy nodded and saw a nurse walking in and stepped out to give them some privacy again. In the meantime she called a taxi because she arrived with Robert and he left with the car.

The nurse helped Beckett get into a wheel chair because of the hospital policy. 'So are you ready to go?' Andy asked grabbing his personal items. 'Only if you will take care of me once i get home. You and i both know you know your way around me and my house.' He let out a dirty sounding laugh. This was it, he can't keep flirting with her, she had to act on it. She threw the bag with his stuff as hard as she could into his lap against his bruised ribs. He let out a painfull grunt and cursed under his breath. 'Sorry, i thought you wanted to hold your stuff yourself.' Andy pushed the wheelchair and walked to the taxi. They got in and drove towards Beckett's house. She was planning to drop him off and get the hell out of there. The memories of their shared afternoon still haunted her. 'So you're just gonna leave me here injured and alone?' Beckett tried once more to make her stay 'Yes the doctors said you can be alone since you only have minor injuries.' She handed him his painkillers 'If not you have neighbours and your team to call. Get well soon.' Andy walked out as fast as she could without looking back. The taxi was still waiting for her.

While she was in the taxi on her way to Dean's place she tried to call Robert. Meredith advised her to let him cool off but is that truly the best option? He didn't asnwer his phone so she tried another time and again got his voicemail. frustrated she put her phone back in the pocket of her jacket. She was trying to weigh her options of what was best to do next. Was it smart to get over to him, should she wait a day or does that seem like she doesn't care. After a 15 minute taxi ride she got to Dean's place. She payed the taxi driver and got out.

She walked in and immediately felt little arms around her legs. 'Annie i didn't think you would be here today, i'm so happy to see you!' Andy lifted Pru up and gave her a big hug. 'Neither did i' she heard Dean say while standing in the kitchen. 'coffee?' Dean asked 'Coffee!' she nodded. 'Annie where is uncle Robert i wanna show him all my toys.' Pru explained loudly. 'Pruey uncle Robert is at his house right now but i can tell you a little secret. He thinks you're the coolest and i'm sure he would love to see all your toys when he comes over again!' She thought back of the sight of them together and wanders how it would've been if the pregnancy went well. He would have a 3 month old in his arms now. Robert would be such a good dad she knew that for sure. Pru started to yawn a couple times 'I think it is nap time for you isn't it? say bye to Annie you'll see her soon.' Dean told her 'Bye Annie, give uncle Robert a hug from me!' she gave Andy a kiss on her cheek and walked to her room with Dean.

'Okay so i wasn't gonna ask with Pruey with us but what is going on? You were supposed to be with Robert the whole day, right?' Dean sat down on a chair and looked at Andy. 'Dean i screwed up big time. I'm going to tell you some things and they're gonna shock you but please let me vent for a second.' She looked at her hands and started to nervously play with them 'I was pregnant but i lost the baby during the seperation. That is why i didn't go back to Robert, i felt too guilty and heartbroken to share my pain with him. So i coped by going numb for the whole 10 months, at first because of anger but that quickly turned to hurt, heartbreak and guilt.' Andy started crying. 'Owh Andy i'm so sorry' Dean got up and sat down next to her and put his hand on her back and tried to comfort her. 'Then papi's rig burned down and all the feelings i pushed down came back up again. The fact that i never told Robert about the baby and the loss, that i left him and have been a shit wife. I needed to feel something or at least try. So after a few drinks i made the decision to sleep with someone.' She took a sip of her coffee and started tearing up. 'I told Robert everything just not his name. He found out today we were getting ready for our date and apparently one afternoon of fun is enough to put someone as your emergency contact.' Dean looked shocked towards her 'Hold up mister one afternoon of fun put you up as his emergency contact? that's some weird shit Andy i'm sorry. What happend?'

Dean i slept with him... i slept with Beckett' Dean looked at her confused and not able to hide his disgust about what he found out. 'Hang on Beckett as in my sexist asshole captain Beckett?' He asked. 'Yes and Robert found out today so we had a big fight in the hospital. Dean i need your knowledge about how men think. In the hospital he told me he needed a minute. Meredith told me that i should wait a bit to let him cool down. But how long should i wait and let him cool down. Does he mean a minute, a few hours a day or longer?

'Andy i don't know if i'm the best person to give you advice. You know your husband the best. I know i gave Robert a tough time for a while and judged his character but anyone can see that he loves and cares for you. I'm not going to tell you what to do and i don't mean this as an attack but you need to figure out what it is you want for yourself and for your relationship. You may be hurting but you're constantly hurting him in the proces. He doesn't deserve what you've put him through.' Those honest words truly got to her. She was sure about her next step. 'Dean i know i've put him through hell and more i wish i could change that. I am working on myself and hoping we can still work together on our relationship. I want to fight for our love, the love i know we both still feel so deeply. How long do you think i should wait to have this relationship defining conversation?' Dean took a moment to think about his answer. 'I can only speak from my own experience. I'd rather have the fight sooner then later. He needed some time to think and he has had some time. If i were you and you're sure about the next step and ready to fight i'd go to him. Don't wait any longer. I know you're scared to be vulnerable and always act tough we all know you are but you don't have to be that way for your husband. That is the whole beauty of a relationship.' Andy gave him a hug and got up grabbing her car keys and started to walk towards the door. She knew what she had to do. 'Dean i can't thank you enough!' Dean waved at her 'Go get your man back Andy!' The door closed behind her.

Andy finally got the courage to fight for her man once again. They made so much progress already in the last few days. How did they end up here. Why didn't she tell him immediately. He deserved an explanation and no matter how hard it's going to be she will have to do it now. Like Robert said it is time for no more secrets. There is no point in waiting for the relationship therapy anymore. She g got into her and car and started driving to Robert or well how he'd call it their place.

Andy arrives at the well known street and puts the car in park. In front of Robert's house she sees an unknown car but didn't think a lot about it. Andy looked at herself in the mirror. Damn she has had better days. She grabbed the little make up bag she kept in her car and put on some lipgloss and wiped the mascara that had been running down her face from all the crying away with some make up remover. Looked at herself in the mirror again and said 'No point in waiting now let's get your man back.' She leaned over to the passenger seat and grabbed her bag and moved to open the door when she saw movements at the house. A woman with dark hair walked out of Rober'ts house. Robert stood in front of the door waving at her while she walked towards the unknown car. Andy's mind became a hamsterwheel. He didn't, he wouldn't right, there must be an explanation?! Also why does she look so familiar? She saw Robert smiling and heard him say 'Thanks for dropping by! I'll call you for our next appointment. Drive safe!' Andy saw Robert getting back into his house and closed the door. What in the hell is she supossed to do know.

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See you next chapter xx