A/N: I can't believe it's been over a year? like wow I'm terrible. Anyway here's 6 thousand words of... I don't even know what this is, to be honest.

Chapter 27: Sirius.

The first thing Sirius Black remembered being taught was simple. Conceal your feelings to the world. Aristocracy was an example, behave as such. No scandals. Never reaching either end of the emotional spectrum for too long, especially in public, was the way to succeed. He never thought it was right but it had been the only way he knew, until the Potters and his friends showed him better. Still, at times, he found himself slipping into old habits. Like now, when Remus and Mary were giggling and trying to get him to say what had happened between him and Meredith. They were teasing him, he knew, but it was still making his heart beat fast.

"Oh, com'on!" Mary smiled, nudging him slightly. "You've got to tell us something! Mer won't say a thing. Just that 'events transpired'." At this she rolled her eyes, changing her voice to imitate Meredith's own one.

Sirius thought it was a very bad but still amusing attempt. He allowed a smirk.

"Yeah, Padfoot, give us the details," Remus said, jokingly. "Did you kiss her? You did, didn't you?"

He realized, and it happened because Remus' eyes kept going to the very excited Mary, that the only reason his best friend was asking him this now was because Mary wanted to know. His friends already knew everything that had happened. Sirius still didn't want to talk about it, especially if Meredith didn't seem as eager to share.

"I don't kiss and tell, mate." He shrugged, looking across the Gryffindor table and into the Great Hall.

His eyes met Rose Brownlie's blue ones. She was a Ravenclaw, Sixth Year just like him, and she had spent the last hour ogling him from across the room. She was beautiful, with shining green eyes and long brown hair that shone red with the light. Sirius and Rose had hang out several times, nothing serious, but he'd gotten to know her, in a sense. And she didn't hold a candle to Mer. Nobody had for a long time now. Still, he sent her a wink, nonchalant. The answer he received was a sultry smile.

"So you did kiss!" Mary pointed out with a smile big enough to show all her teeth.

This conversation was making him uncomfortable. He didn't know where he and Meredith stood and he could tell that Mary was going there. And she was sure to report back to Meredith with everything he had said, whether Meredith wanted to know or not. And he was terrified of the possibility of Meredith thinking him ridiculous, of thinking him delusional enough to think she would ever take him back. After all he had done, mistake after mistake after bloody mistake, why would Meredith even forgive him fully enough to love him?

Sirius opened his mouth, already thinking of a witty remark that wouldn't show the constant struggle inside his mind, when a low, far away rumbled reached his ears. He closed his mouth and turned, looking around. He hadn't been the only one to notice. The very few people who hadn't gone to Hogsmeade were looking around, curious.

"Was that thunder?" Mary wondered out loud, looking up as if expecting the Great Hall's ceiling to reflect the thunder occurring outside.

But the ceiling showed blue sky, slightly cloudy, but no storm. Sirius' senses went into overdrive when he realised the teachers present didn't look curious, they looked worried. He stood up at the same time Professor McGonagall did.

"Something's happened." Remus got up as well.

They watched as Professor Dumbledore approached Professor McGonagall, having entered the Great Hall through the side door, and told her something quietly. McGonagall's eyes widened slightly but enough that Sirius caught a glance of the panic reflected in them, and she turned to Professor Babbling, probably telling her the same thing Dumbledore had told her. The teachers passed the information one by one until they all knew. Sirius watched them closely, gauging their reactions.

He figured they'd tell them all what had happened but the teachers simply nodded and sat back down, going back to doing whatever they were doing. Professor Slughorn's quill was trembling as he went back to grading papers, though. And Professor McGonagall's eyes seemed stuck to one of the windows.

He and Remus took a step towards the teachers' table at the same time, without thinking about it, but Professor Dumbledore met their eyes just as quickly and shook his head. They paused, hesitant.

"I'm sure it was nothing, Remus." Mary commented, her hand going up and grabbing Remus' sleeve. "They would have said something otherwise."

"Right, you're right." Remus nodded down at her with kind eyes.

Sirius sat down again and conversation returned like normal, the only difference was him burying the dread pulsing through his veins deep down. Mary didn't bring Meredith back into the conversation and the three of them just spent the time with idle chatting, except that Sirius couldn't help feeling like time wasn't passing. He glanced down at his wristwatch and, stark against a background of deep blues and greens, he saw it was quarter to six. The Hogsmeade trip would be back soon. She'd be back soon. With that thought, he felt himself relax.

"May I have your attention, please?" Dumbledore's voice suddenly rang through the Great Hall, commanding and clear.

Everyone turned to the front of the Great Hall, with Remus and Sirius sharing a knowing look.

"I am most afraid to inform you all," Dumbledore continued, twinkling eyes roaming around the Great Hall with the same precision as a hawk. "There has been an… incident at Hogsmeade."

Sirius' heart skidded to a stop. Around him, the Great Hall erupted in whispers that elevated to full on shouting as people began to freak out. Remus said something and Mary answered him but Sirius couldn't hear anything aside from the blood ringing in his ears.

"Silence, please! Remain calm," Dumbledore requested, his voice powerful enough to quiet down the racket in the room. "Now, the threat has been contained, but assistance is still required. So if you are off age and willing to help, please see Professor McGonagall."

Sirius was on his feet and striding towards said professor before Dumbledore was even finished speaking. McGonagall saw him the second he reached her peripheral vision, almost like she'd been expecting him. Considering the amount of people he loved that were at Hogsmeade at this very moment, he wouldn't be surprised if McGonagall had known he'd be the first in line.

"Mr. Black," she began with a tone that immediately let him know he wouldn't be allowed to go.

"Professor, please. I need to go." Sirius requested, trying to keep calm and thanking his mother for ever teaching him how to be a proper, cold Black.

"Our friends are down there." Remus jumped in, appearing beside him. "If we can help, we will."

"Sign this, and go with Professor Slughorn." Professor McGonagall handed Remus a piece of parchment before signalling to the small group of students already with Professor Slughorn.

Remus signed it and made his way over, his hand going to Sirius' shoulder and squeezing it slightly as he passed him. Sirius reached out for the parchment at the same time McGonagall held it farther from him, her features stern.

"You have yet to be cleared to leave the castle by Madam Pomfrey, Mr. Black." She reminded him, slowly.

Sirius fought the urge to scream.

"I feel fine." He assured her with a composure he didn't know he possessed.

The professor regarded him for a moment, closely, to the point where he felt like she was seeing right into him. He briefly wondered if she was using Legilimency on him but knew it would have felt much different if she were. After a moment, Professor McGonagall sighed and looked around, lips furrowed.

"You're lucky we need all the help we can get with such short notice." She finally spoke, handing him the parchment. "But the second you start breathing funny, I will send you back, Mr. Black."

That was good enough for him.

Whatever he had been expecting, this hadn't been it. Incident, Dumbledore had called it. Raid or battle seemed more fitting. Hogsmeade was in shambles. Smoke, ash and rubble lied where houses had once stood. The Three Broomsticks was nothing but flames still. Where he stood, halfway down the slope leading to the small town, he could see a small camp, filled with injured people and healers, aurors were running about back and forth, some trying to put out the fires in the town, others taking people to safety. He even saw one or two escorting suspects out.

As he reached the camp, right in between the castle and Hogsmeade, close enough to it that injured could be treated but far away that the aftermath of the destroyed town wouldn't reach them, he paused, looking around. Sirius was horrified to see that the white rectangles he'd seen on his way here were indeed bodies. His heart lurched into his throat. What if one of those was James? Or Lily, or Peter, Marlene, Dorcas, Geller. Merlin, what if one of them was Meredith? He suddenly had trouble breathing.

"Sirius!"

The cry came from his left. Sirius whirled around, grey eyes searching desperately for the owner of the voice. He knew it wasn't the voice he needed to hear but it was just as important.

"Flower!" he exclaimed, catching a very distraught Lily Evans in his arms. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine." She nodded, still clinging to him. "I got stunned but a healer cleared me, said I'm okay."

Sirius allowed a relieved breath out. Lily was still crying, though, and his worry returned.

"They came out of nowhere, Sirius." She whispered, hiding her face into his sleeve. "I had never seen them in real life, it made everything so… real."

He had no doubt that 'they' were Death Eaters. Still, he needed confirmation. He needed to know for sure.

"Who, Lils, who came?"

"Death Eaters." She whispered, and the words sent a shiver all the way down through her body so strong Sirius felt her tremble. "They were just killing people. And—they took muggleborns from town. People I know, Sirius. It could have been me."

His blood started to run cold. He took her shoulders and pulled until she stood in front of him, trying as hard as possible to hide every feeling he was feeling from her.

"Flower," Sirius began.

A loud, heart-wrenching cry reached them. It was so distressed Lily scrunched her eyes close, her nails digging into Sirius' arms. He looked up, startled. His heart stopped once more and this time he had more trouble composing his face. Lady Alexandria Potter was crying, halfway standing, halfway collapsed. Sirius had no doubt she'd be lying on the floor if it wasn't because her husband was holding her up, his cheeks shining with tears, face contorted in pain. It was the most negative emotion he had ever seen Meredith's dad convey.

"No! Please, no." Professor Potter wailed, her voice so broken it shook something inside of Sirius.

Lily whimpered in his arms, another shiver wrecking her body. Sirius forced his eyes towards the ground, needing to know who it was. Resting on the muddied grass, covered by a clean white sheet, was a body. A Potter. A healer was kneeling in front of them, holding one end of the sheet away from their face, most likely needing visual confirmation from the two distressed parents looking down at their lost child. Sirius couldn't see their face but he knew they were too tall to be Meredith. His heart slowed down from its mad running.

"Who?" he asked Lily.

"Christian." She lamented, opening her eyes. "Killing Curse. Ariadne is really hurt as well. They've taken her to St. Mungos. But, Sirius, it doesn't look good." She shook her head, green eyes wide, no doubt thinking the same thing he was.

Meredith would be devastated. She loved the twins more than she loved anyone else. They were her favourite. How many times had they heard all the stories of them basically raising her? The only other person she trusted more than she trusted her siblings was James. And now one of them was dead, the other, about to be. He needed to find her, now even more than before.

"Lily, where is she?" he asked, barely noticing his own voice shaking at the end. He cleared his throat. "Where is Meredith?"

"We don't know." Lily almost shouted, bottom lip starting to tremble again. "I saw her before everything happened. She was with Marlene and they were shopping! But then, I don't—I never saw her, during—oh, Merlin, you don't think they took her, do you?"

"What did Mar say?" Sirius asked instead.

It wasn't time to worry now. Now, it was time for answers. Worry could come later. In Hogsmeade, the Three Broomsticks crackled and sizzled loud enough for the two of them to look up. Sirius watched as what was left of the structure crumbled to the ground, easier than he thought was possible. Aurors and Ministry officials shouted something at each other as they hurried towards the building, too far away for Sirius to catch their words.

"They got separated by the crowd. Marlene says she got a glimpse of her twice but…" Lily trailed off, absentmindedly looking at the ruins of Hogsmeade.

Sirius let out a shaking breathe, left hand going through his hair. He was so close to losing his cool, so close to walking into Hogsmeade himself and looking for her. He looked around the buzzling camp, trying to find Marlene through the crowd of rushing healers and hurt students and people, trying to see past aiding teachers and older students, definitely avoiding Professor McGonagall and even Meredith's parents. Marlene had been the last to see her, he'd ask her where and he'd start looking there.

He found Marlene sitting in a little rock, thick blanket around her shoulders. She looked even more horrified than Lily had when she'd run into his arms. Sirius didn't care. He strode towards her, avoiding people on his way there, ignoring Lily's questioning words. Marlene jumped when he reached her, fingers shakily pulling the blanket tighter around her.

"Sirius? What are you—?"

"Where did you see Meredith last?" he interrupted before she could finish her sentence.

"Zonko's, I think," she said. "That's what I told James, anyways."

Some of the pressure on his chest went away. James was fine. And he was looking for Mer. At least she wasn't at the mercy of some auror who didn't really care if she was found or not. Sirius turned to Lily, who just nodded at him.

"He left the second he realized she wasn't here." Lily informed him. "They're going to be fine, Sirius. He'll find her."

Sirius nodded, not trusting his voice to show all that he was feeling. He didn't think worry like this was possible. Taking a deep breath in, he sat down next to Marlene, waiting. He knew he should be helping, just like Remus and Peter seemed to be doing a few feet away from them, but all he really cared about was James and Meredith coming back, both harmless. Lily sat down next to him and the three of them just waited, not saying anything.

"Help! Please, help, someone!"

Sirius jumped to his feet, Lily and Marlene close behind him. They all knew that voice: it was James and he was running up the hill towards safety with someone in his arms. At first, Sirius didn't even recognize her but when he did, the world did a one-eighty and he thought he was going to collapse. Meredith Potter looked dead. Everything seemed in slow-motion. Sirius watched as Professor McGonagall and Madam Pomfrey rushed towards James, other two healers rushing forwards as well. He was barely aware of Lily grabbing his hand and dragging him towards them, her other hand pressed to her mouth so hard he briefly wondered if it wasn't painful. The Potters were suddenly next to James, clinging to each other. James was just kneeling on the grass, barely holding back tears. Sirius saw all this but didn't at the same time, unable to tear his eyes away from her.

'Bleeding like a pig' was something he heard once. He didn't think it was possible, Meredith was skinny, she shouldn't have this much blood, it couldn't be possible. And yet, blood was all he saw. It tinted her blonde hair a dark red. It looked almost fluorescent against her pale face. It soaked her blouse until it seemed see-through. And it was still flowing, out of her and into the wet grass, into Madam Pomfrey's hands, taking her life with it. Sirius' eyes went to Meredith's face, hoping to see any sign that she was actually alive. He found none. Her skin was so pale he could see the small veins in her closed eyelids, her lips were a purplish grey. She wasn't moving at all.

"Poppy…" Professor McGonagall said, her low voice snapping Sirius out of his reverie.

"Oh, Minerva," Madam Pomfrey lamented, sharing a look with the other two young healers. "She's too far gone."

Sirius stopped breathing.

"This is Alexandria's child, Poppy." McGonagall reminded her. It felt like she was begging her. "She already lost a child today, will you have her lose two?"

Sirius's eyes unwillingly went to Meredith's parents then. Professor Potter was openly weeping against her husband's shoulder, shaking her head among a litany of 'no's. Meredith's dad was just holding her, numbingly looking down at his daughter.

"She's lost too much blood, Minerva." Madam Pomfrey shook her head. "She's not breathing. I don't…" the older witch sighed, looking down at Meredith with pity.

One of the other healers stepped up then, saying something to Madam Pomfrey she seemed to agree with. Sirius didn't hear it. Madam Pomfrey's words kept repeating on his mind over and over. She's not breathing. She's not breathing. She's not breathing. She's not breathing. His eyes stung. Sirius felt himself fall to the floor, his knees protesting when they hit the hard ground. Lily's hand slipped from his own but she quickly put it on his shoulder, squeezing it until it hurt. He didn't mind.

Meredith couldn't be dead. She'd been fine this morning. He'd held her on his arms less than seventy-two hours ago, he had kissed her, touched her, felt her. If he closed his eyes, he could still feel her touch, her breath mixed with his. How could a person be so alive one day and gone the next? And how could he have possibly said the things he said? We shouldn't, he had said. Friends, he had called what they were. And now she'd never get the chance to hear the words he really wanted to say. Sirius would never get to see her smile again.

"I've got a pulse!" a healer shouted, excited.

Sirius' eyes flashed wide open. Through a blurry vision, he caught Meredith's mouth opening in a staggering gasp followed by a weak cough that tainted her lips red with blood. Her eyes opened for a second, her hand barely stretched upwards towards James' general direction.

"Mer?" Sirius asked, practically crawling as close to her as the adults would let him.

Her eyes met his. Her lips stretched out in a barely visible smile before it fell, eyes closing just as easily as they had opened.

"Mer? Meredith?" Sirius asked again, fear gripping his heart so tight he couldn't breathe.

The three healers shuffled all around her, shouting out words and orders as they levitated her. Sirius didn't hear any of it. He stumbled to his feet, trying to go after them. Professor McGonagall stopped him dead on his tracks, telling him not to follow or House Points would be taken. He couldn't give a shit about House Points.

"Meredith! Meredith!" he called, trying to get around McGonagall.

"Sirius, it's okay, we'll see her later," Marlene suggested, appearing next to the Professor.

They didn't get it. 'Later' could be too late. He needed her now. He looked behind him, trusting James would be just as desperate to go to her. His best friend hadn't moved at all from his spot on the grass, the only change was Lily had her arms around him now. Sirius felt like he was spiralling. No one seemed to understand the importance of this. He needed to hear her voice, he needed to know she was alive.

Sirius called out her name once more. No answer came.

The next few days passed by in a blur to him. They weren't allowed to see Meredith at all. James was restless. Marlene felt guilty. Lily had gone full overprotective mum on all of them. And Sirius couldn't take a deep breath in without feeling like the carefully constructed mask he wore would crumble down. He missed her more than he had in the last two years. At least then he got to see her every day.

All Defence Against the Dark Arts lessons were being taught by either Professor Slughorn or any other professor available. Once, they even had Dumbledore. Professor Potter's absence served as a constant reminder for Sirius and his friends of what they could lose. Ariadne was getting worse and worse and, judging by the silence coming from the Hospital Wing, it looked like Meredith wasn't any better either. Sirius couldn't think about that without almost being sick.

"Padfoot, are you awake?" James whispered across the darkness of their dorm, his voice almost lost to the soft snores coming from the three other habitants of the warm room.

Sirius jumped up, breaking his staring contest with the top of his four-poster, and cleared his throat, hoping James wouldn't hear the emotion behind it.

"Yeah."

There was a moment of silence, in which Peter let out a particularly loud snore that would usually have Sirius and James doubled over in laughter. They didn't. Sirius turned on his side, his fingers tightening the bedsheets around him, and faced James' way.

"I thought of something awful." James explained. "And I need to say it out loud, so I won't feel so bad about it."

Sirius didn't say anything, just waited.

"I just thought… I thought—Ariadne's life for Mer's." James admitted.

Bargaining, Sirius thought. Wasn't that one of the stages of loss? Denial came first and then bargaining, followed by depression and anger, leading up to acceptance. It looked like it had taken James longer to reach bargaining than it had Sirius, who felt like he was well into the third stage already. As long as I'm not given a reason to reach acceptance, he thought to himself, front teeth digging into his bottom lip, there's hope. Acceptance would mean the end, it would mean Meredith was really and forever gone.

"How could I do that? Ari's my cousin, too." James continued talking, unaware of his friend's inner battle.

"I've been wishing for the same thing, Prongs." Sirius admitted back to him. "Everyday."

"I'm so sorry, Padfoot," James said after a while.

His eyes stung. He wiped at them angrily. Meredith wasn't dead yet. He'd see her once more, he'd hold her once more. Even as he thought it, the promise felt empty.

"Yeah, me too." Sirius replied, turning to face the ceiling once more.

The tall, heavy wooden doors of the Hospital Wing were closed. Still, the three of them stood together in front of them, waiting. They had a free period before dinner and Sirius had been at the library with James and Lily when they'd received the parchment from Professor McGonagall asking them to go down to the Hospital Wing. Sirius had tagged along, willing to get in trouble if it meant receiving any type of news. When the doors opened, he held his breath.

Professor Potter, Professor McGonagall, Professor Dumbledore and a healer Sirius didn't recognize stepped out, looking every bit as professional as grim.

"Miss Potter is still unconscious." The healer explained before any of them could say a word. "We don't know when she will wake up… if she wakes up. She has, however, been speaking in her sleep." His tone of voice went from crisp to hesitant, his eyes going to Professor Dumbledore.

"I believe you…" Dumbledore spoke, his eyes pausing at Sirius. "three are more than aware of Miss Potter's sixth sense?"

James and Lily shared a confused look before turning to Sirius. It took a second, but everything clicked into place. Meredith was having visions while unconscious. Not only was she probably in a lot of pain, her magic was betraying her by giving her visions. It wasn't news to him, of course, that her visions were getting out of control. It wasn't news that she'd spoke them in her sleep only to forget them in the morning. And it wasn't news to him either that her visions tended to be filled with pain and misery. I fell asleep with the quill in my hand, Sirius! Meredith had said, I wrote down my dream. She was probably terrified now.

"I thought—I thought those were gone." James frowned. "She hasn't talked about them in a while."

"Yeah, since Christmas." Lily agreed, looking at the adults present with doubt written all over her green eyes.

Professor Dumbledore just kept his eyes on Sirius, one eyebrow raised questioningly. Next to him, Professor Potter crossed her arms, lips furrowed. James and Lily turned to him, confused.

"She didn't want anyone to know." Sirius admitted, suddenly feeling guilty for keeping something like this a secret.

"Unbelievable." Professor Potter muttered with venom in her voice.

Sirius didn't say anything else.

"The thing is," the healer began after silence stretched too long. "In her current state of…" he struggled for the correct word, frowning, "delirium, Miss Potter seems to be asking for you two."

At this, he pointed at James and Lily with his wand. Sirius frowned, sending the healer a glare. Meredith wasn't delirious, she was a Seer. There was a big difference. Besides him, James and Lily tensed. Sirius felt just as wary as they did. So far, the only visions Meredith had been vocal about were the ones that caused her emotional pain, the ones filled with death. And now, she was asking for Lily and James.

"Heaven's sake, Angus." Professor McGonagall exhaled. "The girl is not crazy, she's a Seer. You can't tell me she's the first you've ever treated."

Sirius loved Professor Minerva McGonagall in that moment more than he ever had.

"There is no factual proof that Seers exist." The healer, Angus, shook his head. "For all I know, she ought to be examined and checked up before she hurts anyone else with these so-called premonitions."

Sirius wanted to punch him. James took a step forward, wand raised slightly.

"You will not be treating my daughter like one of the loonies in your hospital!" Professor Potter warned, taking a calculated step towards the healer with ease.

"Now, Lady Potter," Dumbledore interrupted, placing one hand on the woman's shoulder. The witch seemed to relax slightly but she didn't back down, eyes throwing daggers at the healer. "Let's remember we all want the same here, and that is to help Miss Potter get better." Dumbledore levelled a steady look at her. Professor Potter cleared her throat and resumed to her old position, eyes hard.

"We've decided to allow you to see her," Professor McGonagall said, turning towards them. "Hopefully, your presence will help her heal."

At her words, the healer let out a small scoff of disbelief, but he followed Professor Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall towards the door anyways. James and Lily followed them without hesitation. Sirius' heart was beating harder than ever before. This was it, he'd finally get to see her after days of waiting. Just as he was about to cross through the threshold, however, the door slammed on his face. He blinked and took a step back, looking up at the owner of the perfectly manicured hand pressed to the door.

"Professor Potter," Sirius acknowledged her, keeping his confusion away from his face or voice.

"You are not visiting her." She informed him, twirling around and beginning to walk away. "Only family is allowed."

Sirius gritted his teeth, fighting the anger beginning to rise inside his chest. He began to walk towards the professor, debating what to say to get her to cave.

"Evans isn't family," he pointed out, finally catching up to her.

Professor Potter halted on her step before slowly turning around to face him. Sirius took a step back, suddenly nervous.

"Miss Evans didn't abandon my daughter while she bled on a bathroom floor." Professor Potter's tone was as icy as her eyes.

Sirius's eyes stung. He cleared his throat and looked down, hoping the woman standing before him wouldn't notice him wiping furiously at his left eye. She did, if the tired sigh that reached him was any giving.

"I know you had nothing to do with it." She explained, walking closer to him. "But you left her when she needed you. James may not know and Meredith may have forgiven you already. But she's my baby and I will never forget it."

Sirius Black had never been more afraid of Lady Alexandria Potter. Still, he had to try. Meredith had run to him when he finally woke up and he'd only been hit with a bludger. Mer had died and been brought back and, even then, the healers were saying she was getting worse. She's dying, a little voice in the back of his head whispered, just like it had since he saw her, hurt and bloodied. If Meredith was dying, Sirius had to be there for her. He could feel his heart beating against his ribcage, trying to escape.

Sirius remembered the last time he saw her. Eight days and ten hours ago. That was of course if he didn't count the dreading moment when James walked towards them with Meredith in his arms. But he'd like to erase that sight from his memory, even if it was all he saw when he closed his eyes. No, the last time he had seen her was eight days and ten hours ago. They had all had breakfast in the Great Hall together. She had sat down next to him and even if they hadn't talked much, Sirius had never felt more at ease. Meredith had sent him a bright smile and walked away. See you soon, she'd said. Sirius had kept his eyes on her until the door to the Great Hall had closed. He'd seen her pause to talk to the twins, he'd seen her wave at Delilah. 'Soon' had never come. If Meredith died… could he really let that be the last memory he had of her? Sirius already knew the answer to that.

"Professor, I love her." He admitted, hoping against hope that would soften the older witch standing before him.

"Quite," she said, unfazed. "Which is why I know you'll do the right thing by her. My daughter doesn't need people like you in her life." Professor Potter sent him a half shrug. "She deserves better."

"But—"

"I'm meeting my husband in St. Mungo's." she interrupted him, not even glancing at him as she began to walk away. "You better not be here when I come back."

He was still there when Professor Potter returned and the day after that and the day after that, until the older witch had no choice but to allow Sirius to see Meredith.

Sirius was relieved to see her but just as heartbroken. Meredith looked better, her skin wasn't the same awful shade of grey it had been, her lips were rosy, but she was still unconscious and there was a small crease in-between her eyebrows, where she was scrunching them together. His heart clenched painfully as he sat down on the seat next to her, hand reaching out and grasping her own. His worry returned darker than ever when he felt the cold tips of her fingers, colder than they should have been.

He would stay there until she woke up, Sirius decided, even if he had to will her back to consciousness.

Turning into a big black dog to watch over his ex seemed like an awful idea. It probably broke every single principle in privacy there was. Sirius knew this. Still, the second she stormed out of the Ancient Runes classroom and then missed dinner, he knew he had to find her.

"If you're going to kill me or something," Meredith said, wiping furiously at her tear-stained face. "Hurry up."

Sirius frowned, heart pounding. She'd been more than a little shocked when she turned around and met a dog instead of a person, which Sirius thought was understandable. They had stared at each other in anticipation for at least ten minutes, with her blinking every few minutes and looking around, probably wishing someone would assure her she was in fact not hallucinating the dog. Asking him to kill her, however, was not the words Sirius had been expecting to pass her lips. "Aw, you're so cute!" would have been more understandable, it tended to be the reaction he always got in dog-form.

He took a hesitant step forward, reaching forward and nudging her knee with his nose. She tensed. He sat back, looking upwards at her from the cold grass. After a moment, her fingers reached down to his head, hesitantly stroking between his ears. Sirius closed his eyes, revelling on the feel of her touch.

"You know, for all the rumours I've heard about the Grim, you're pretty adorable." She commented after a moment of nothing but her scratching his ears.

Everything made sense, Sirius realized. He supposed he was a pretty big, shaggy dog that could have easily been confused by the Grim. Relief flooded through his bloodstream; Meredith didn't want to die, she just thought the Grim had come to take her. When he opened his eyes, he realized Meredith was giving him the first real smile she'd given anyone since she woke up. His joking 'thank you' came out as a loud bark.

"I agree," Meredith laughed, moving until she was sitting with her legs crossed in front of him.

He barked again, placing his head on her lap and getting comfortable. This was the closest Sirius had been to her in a while and, in the sappiest way possible, he'd missed it. Meredith just kept brushing her fingers through his hair, quiet.

"My siblings are dead." She eventually mumbled. "Fabian is dead. My friends hate me…" she sighed, voice shaking.

Sirius looked up, meeting her tearful eyes. This was what he'd been worried about. She was heartbroken, in pain, exhausted and, in her haste to assure everyone that she wasn't about to break down, she had forgotten to deal with her pain. It was the same toxic behaviour that had led her to—that had led him to open a bathroom door and see nothing but bright red against soft, rosy skin. He had run away from it once, but he wouldn't abandon her again.

"I don't know what to do." Meredith whispered, voice soft.

Sirius didn't waste any time. He lifted his head until it was over her shoulder, his attempt at supporting words leaving his mouth as a quiet whine. Meredith buried her hands into the fur in his shoulders, returning the semi-hug without a pause.

"Thank you," she said against his neck, where Sirius could feel her small smile.

They fell into an accidental routine, then. She still had to sit for exams and their friends weren't very good at hiding their sympathy whenever it became obvious she was falling behind. It annoyed her. So, she'd go to the Black Lake to study or hide. And Sirius would sit with her as a dog. It wasn't ideal, he'd much rather hang out with her in human form, but it brought her comfort. Besides, she seemed… calmer during the day, more open to conversation with anyone. So, he kept it up.

"Are you sure she's okay, Padfoot?" James asked him anxiously.

The four of them were sat on a table at the end of the library, studying for the penultimate exam of the year: Transfiguration. Sirius sighed in half annoyance. Of course, he had told James he'd been keeping an eye on Meredith and of course he expected James to want to know everything. He'd underestimated how often James would ask, though.

"She's fine, Prongs." Sirius insisted.

"But, has she said anything?" James asked again. "Are her wounds completely healed? Has she spoken about, well, about Ari and Chris?"

Next to them, Peter and Remus looked up as well, curious to hear the answer themselves. Sirius sighed, conflicted. Could he really tell them and knowingly break the trust Meredith had unknowingly given him? He didn't need to think about it to know the answer.

"James, I'm not telling you that." Sirius shook his head, returning to his notes.

"Why not?"

"We're just worried," Peter added.

"Mer doesn't know it's me she's talking to!" Sirius said, voice accidentally rising slightly. His friends jumped up. He sighed, passing a hand down his face. "It's been so long since she's actually trusted me with anything, mate. I can't break that trust, I can't."

He wasn't even sure how she felt about him. While they had fallen into an easy routine when he was a dog, their human interactions weren't as easy. Sure, they talked, she smiled at him whenever they passed each other in the hallway, they sat together at times, but there was an uncertainty to it, like they were both waiting for the other shoe to drop. The whole thing made Sirius anxious. They had been, hopefully, heading somewhere before Hogsmeade had been attacked, but they hadn't gotten a change to speak about it. Sirius didn't know how to bring it up, either. He felt it'd be selfish to do so, after everything. Sirius did know, however, that if Meredith found out the friendly dog she'd been confiding to was actually him and that, to top it off, he'd been divulging her secrets to his friends, she would never, ever give him the time of day again.

"You could just tell her, y'know?" Remus commented.

"It's not that easy." Sirius' tone was finite.

"Clay asked me out today," Meredith suddenly mentioned with an easy tone.

During the weeks of them hanging out together, with him as a big, shaggy dog and her not knowing said dog was in fact her ex-boyfriend, Meredith had gotten around to filling the silence with words. Sirius reckoned she had told him stuff not even Lily knew. Still, the jealousy he suddenly felt overpowered any other feeling. The growl that left him was somehow very amusing to her.

"Well, he is kind of cute." She laughed. He barked, mad. "Alright. I said no, anyway." She assured him, her hand returning to his back, unfazed by his apparent anger. "I just wanted to know what you thought."

There was something hidden in her tone. He didn't think much of it, though, until three days later.

Sirius was walking out of the Potions Laboratory, smug. He had passed his Potions final with flying colours, he knew. He couldn't wait for summer; going out almost every night, drinking, partying, sleeping in. Sirius was more than aware that this summer would be different, of course, giving the war they were going through, but he hoped it'd bring his friends closer. A last hurrah in a future filled with fighting.

"Black!"

Sirius halted on his step, cursing under his breath. Meredith was advancing on him, eyes narrowed and mouth turned into a snarl. She had a thick, leather book close to her chest. Sirius couldn't read the title. He didn't need to; he already knew that book. And he also knew that Meredith had found out. There wasn't another reason why she'd be this mad.

"Mer…" Sirius began when she finally reached him, hands up in surrender. "Listen—"

"Shut up." Meredith snapped, eyes drifting around the hallway.

Sirius followed the path of her eyes with his own. The hallway they were standing on was considerably busy. Every single student in it had stopped and turned to look at them, curious and nosey. It wasn't a secret that Meredith and Sirius had kissed several times throughout the year. And it wasn't a secret that they had slept together. It also wasn't a secret that nothing had come of it yet. Everyone was probably holding on to the edge of their seats, waiting to find out what would happen. Any of these students was probably ready to write down anything that happened and send it to Hogwarts: A Gossip. His eyes went back to her angry frown.

"Meet me tonight during dinner." She explained. "Don't be late."

Maybe she didn't know, Sirius thought, even if it felt like wishful-thinking. Maybe she was mad at him for some other reason.

"Meet you where?" he asked, nonchalant.

Something dangerous flashed behind her eyes.

"Don't test me, Padfoot." Meredith warned him, turning around and walking away just as quickly as she had reached him.

"Fucking Hell." He cursed, running a hand through his hair.

Whispers erupted around him. He ignored them all, instead beginning to walk towards the staircase leading out of the dungeons. He was aiming for the Common Room, where hopefully James was. Sirius needed time to think of a reasonable explanation. Otherwise, he would lose Meredith once and for all. He couldn't half-ass himself out of this one. Sirius sighed. He was already dreading dinner.

A/N: Right, so like I said... I don't know what this is. Filler chapter, I guess. Anyways, the next chapter is halfway finished but I'm going on Holiday next week for a month, so you may have to wait a month. Sorry, guys. I'm terrible with schedules, I know. I still love you lots and hope you can forgive the mess I am. xx