On arriving in Mistralton City, Ash asked Arc whether there was any information about when the Mistralton Gym was available.

"There is," Arc confirmed. "And, as a further extrapolation, I assume you would like to know when the Mistralton Gym is available?"

"Please," Ash replied.

"The Mistralton Gym is currently: open," Arc replied. "Skyla is holding Gym Hours and will be doing so for the next thirty minutes."

"Then we'd better hurry!" Ash said, and did.

Cilan watched their friend vanish into the distance, guided by Arc's instructions and with Zygarde loping along at his heels, then glanced at Iris and N. "So… what do we do now?"

"I think the best thing is probably for Archeops to carry you, if she's willing," Iris replied, already Dragon Dancing. "Is that okay, Archeops?"

"It is," Archeops agreed, coming out of her Pokéball and copying Iris' dance. "We won't be able to keep up with him, because he's using Agility, but we won't be all that late."

"Well, fortunately, I've been a short-order cook," Cilan said. "I know a few tricks that might help!"

"...you probably don't," Iris replied, finishing her dance. "Okay, let's go!"

She set off at a sprint, and Archeops offered her hind wings for Cilan to grab onto before taking off as well. For their part, Reshiram used Strength, and lit his turbine to fly his Hero of Truth over to the Mistralton Gym.

Over by the side of the street, some tourists exchanged glances.

"Wow," the man said. "I guess dancercize really does help you gain muscle definition."

"And lose pounds," agreed the shortest member of the group. "I thought dat was only when it was in Galar."

"No, it's lose pound," the third team member replied. "Because you forget a move when you learn it. And don't you forget it!"

"I ain't sure dat's how it works," the short one said, frowning.

"Well, I know I'm signing up for a course," the man decided. "Hmm, do you think it'd work better if I was wearing an outfit based off the slender elegance of a Mienshao?"

"It'd mean the rest of the class was laughing too hard to finish before you," the woman jabbed.

"Name?" Skyla asked.

"I'm Ash Ketchum!" Ash said. "I challenge you to a gym battle! If you've got time."

"Yes, you were on the list," Skyla confirmed. "Hmm..."

The Gym Leader looked at him, then at Pikachu, and put her finger to her lips.

Nothing else happened, and Ash frowned in confusion.

"I'm on the list?" he asked.

"I took the liberty of applying in your name," Arc provided. "Skyla's battles are by appointment."

"Thanks!" Ash said. "But, uh, when is the gym battle happening?"

"It's happened," Skyla replied, giving him a Jet Badge. "Your Pokémon are impressively bonkers."

"...I feel cheated," Pikachu complained.

"Yeah, I agree with Pikachu!" Ash protested. "Where was the battle? Or, wait, did I use Shaymintwo and he unhappenned the battle? Or was Sandile involved? Oh, or did Arc do something?"

"No, that's not what happened," Skyla told him. "To save time, I do Air Battles. That's when I project what I know about my Pokémon, my opponent's Pokémon, and their fighting style, and I predict the entire battle in my head. If my challenger wins, I give them the Jet Badge, otherwise I don't."

Ash blinked a few times.

"First, uh, why?" he said. "And, second, that can't possibly be a fair way of doing gym battles! Even if it does get the right result every time, it's robbing a Pokémon trainer of their chance to learn and grow from a gym battle!"

Iris and Cilan showed up, though Iris had a bit of trouble stopping and nearly crashed into Skyla.

"Has the battle started yet?" she asked. "Dragon Tamers need to know good airborne and air-battling strategies, so I want to see what happens."

"And I'd love to continue my Unova recipe tour!" Cilan contributed, as Reshiram swooped over and put N down next to them. "Finding out what another Gym Leader does to handle Ash is always a fine taste test!"

"She's doing something she calls Sky Battles, which are a massive cheat," Pikachu told him. "There wasn't a battle, she just decided that we got the badge."

"Wait, really?" N asked. "That's a violation of, um… Unova Gym Rule 2b, I think."

"Unova Gym Rule 2b," Arc repeated, drawing a subconscious wince from N. "The battle must happen."

Everyone contemplated that for a moment.

"I feel a bit weird, actually," N admitted. "I got that one right?"

"But the battle does happen," Skyla protested. "It just happens in my head."

"That is not a True statement," Reshiram declared. "And of any Pokémon, I should know that. Imagining a battle is not having a battle."

"Besides, what do you do if the Pokémon your opponent uses is using a move like Metronome?" Iris asked.

"Look, I had to do something," Skyla replied. "I was getting far too many requests for battles, and it meant I didn't have time to also do my job as a commercial aircraft pilot."

"...I hate to sound like I'm criticizing you," Iris began. "But I am. You're the one who's trying to juggle two jobs and not really having enough time for both of them, and… of the two, I guess it's safer to skimp on being a Gym Leader than to skimp on flying aircraft. But it sounds like you don't have the time to be a Gym Leader, and this… isn't a great fix."

There was a silence for several seconds.

"What about if Skyla uses a set menu?" Cilan asked. "Scheduling battles well in advance, that is, and then-"

"-having a Celebi help out!" Ash finished.

"That's not what I was going to say, but if it's possible that's actually a better solution," Cilan replied. "Or Ash could see if one of the Ryuunited Kingdom was willing to be an assistant Gym Leader?"

After going back and forth for a few minutes, Ash asked Arc for a list of all his Pokémon, then began highlighting some of them and checking others off.

"What are you doing?" Arc asked.

"I thought I'd try setting Skyla a challenge," Ash replied. "Hey, Keldeo, is that something I can do?"

"Umm… I think the International Gym Rules allow specifically for a Champion to set challenges for Gym Leaders?" N said. "That's… Rule 66 point 2."

"International Gym Rule 66 point 2," Arc said. "No gym badge may weigh in excess of five kilograms. Unless you plan on making your own gym where the badges are made of osmium, this seems mostly to be a minor curiosity."

"I suppose it was too much to ask," N sighed. "That rule I mean does exist, though, right?"

"Why would that matter?" Skyla said. "I heard you won the Ever Grande conference, but didn't you turn down the Champion title?"

"Yeah, but the Orange League calls you a Champion if you win it, even if you don't replace Drake," Ash replied, shrugging. "Okay, I think I've got my list! Uh… Arc, can you do a hologram thing or something?"

Arc used Or Something, and images of the Pokémon Ash had picked appeared in front of them.

"These are all the Pokémon I have where I haven't yet confirmed that they can fly," Ash explained. "Pick how many you want to battle, and I'll prove you can't rely on known information about Pokémon by teaching some of them to fly during the battle!"

Skyla looked closer.

"...a lot of your Pokémon aren't on here."

"Yeah, imagine," Pikachu said, jumping off Ash's shoulder and using Fly.

The Mistralton Gym Leader considered for a long moment, then checked the time.

"I need to start pre-flight checks in about twenty-five minutes," she said. "If we can stop in time for that to happen, then… I think these three."

She indicated the Pokémon, and Ibid jumped out of Ash's pocket. He double-checked with Arc, then vanished in a Teleport.

Twelve seconds later, he was back with a Pokéball.

"I'm going to get the other two," he explained, and vanished again.

"All right, let's get started!" Ash said, opening the Pokéball. "Dugtrio!"

"I was the first to arrive?" the tallest one of the trio asked.

"Yep!" Ash agreed, as Skyla sent out a Swanna. "Watch out for Water attacks, but the main thing is to try and get you flying by the end of the battle!"

"Gosh, that sounds difficult," the middle Dug of the Trio said.

"How hard can it be?" the tall one replied.

"I knew you'd say that!" the short one complained. "Don't say things like that!"

"Swanna, Bubble Beam," Skyla called, and Dugtrio hid underground.

"All right, I know what we need!" the tall Dugtrio said, as they zipped back and forth between Swanna's attacks. "What do planes need when they take off? Two things. Speed and power! We've got speed, so we just need power!"

"I don't think that works here," the middle one replied. "It's about aerodynamics. What makes planes take off is the air flow over their wings. Key word: wings. We can't benefit from the Bernoulli effect without-"

"Boring!" the tall one said. "Let's go for a ramp!"

"I've missed the feeling of dread that comes over me when you suggest something," the short one groaned, and then they hit the ramp and went over it at ground level.

"Dugtrio, do you need any help?" Ash called.

"No, we're doing fine!" the tall one called.

"I know just what to do," the middle one said. "Now, as you'd expect, I've done this properly, and actually looked up what moves we're capable of learning. We need to get Aerial Ace sorted out, and that's going to-"

"Look out!" the short one interrupted, and they nearly got hit by a Surf. That was followed up by a Blizzard, which hit the Surf and detonated it to send ice fragments flying everywhere, and when the spray settled Dugtrio was covered in ice.

"That's not gone well," the short one summarized. "You blithering idiots."

"I know!" Ash called. "Dugtrio, each of you needs to give the other two a lift! That way each of you is getting two lifts, which is twice as much lifting as you're doing!"

The trio exchanged glances.

"Are we sure that's something we can do?"

"Doesn't sound like it'll work, to be honest."

"You're looking at this the wrong way," the tall one insisted. "This is asking the three of us to work together. It's just ambitious enough to work!"

"...wow," Skyla admitted, as Dugtrio took off. "I have to admit, I didn't expect that."

"I always thought Dugtrio were really long underground," Iris frowned. "I'm not sure where I got that idea, but I definitely got it from somewhere."

"Now, Shift Gear!" Ash called. "Keep doing it until you can't get any higher, then use Extremespeed!"

"I'll handle steering!" the short one said.

"This is going to hurt, isn't it," the middle one asked, then they hit Swanna at blistering speed and slammed the Water-type into the ground.

A faint "Bloody Nora," floated up from the crater.

"Well, I can already admit I'm surprised," Skyla said. "Especially when that Dugtrio said something about going on a grand tour."

"They did?" Ash asked. "When?"

"Sorry, my fault again," Emolga apologized. "I'm working on it, eesh."

Skyla blinked a few times, then shook her head. "I'm just going to assume that that was an explanation," she decided. "All right, is your Dugtrio going to continue battling?"

"Nope, because they've already shown they can do it!" Ash said. "Also, I'm pretty sure they need to go back and work out how many points each of them got for that… Ibid, can you sort that out?"

"On it," Ibid agreed, and Ash sent out his second Pokémon.

"Oh, it's my turn!" Boldore said, waving to the Skarmory she was facing. "Hmm, when you're a Steel type, is that in terms of being carbon steel, or stainless steel, or some other kind of steel? I suppose it has to be stainless because water and poison attacks don't work… are you on the UISI table?"

Skarmory landed with a clatter of feathers.

"I will be honest," he began. "I was mostly expecting some kind of Pokémon battle. I don't know what an UISI is."

"Oh, well, some of us Pokémon made out of earth minerals actually pay attention to our compositional structures!" Boldore replied. "For example, did you know that stainless steel is one of the harder types of steel, but no match in terms of hardness for quartz?"

She stamped the ground with a foot, and a wall of quartz rose up.

"...can Stone Edge even do that?" Skarmory said, more curious than anything. "I thought it worked with stones."

"I don't see why not," Boldore replied. "It's the same elements in the same proportions as make up sandstone, just arranged a bit differently. If it helps I could call it Sand Tomb instead, as in a way it's just a very big sand grain, though since the definition of sand includes grain size it'd technically be a boulder."

"Acrobatics, Skarmory!" Skyla called. "Then use Steel Wing to attack!"

Skarmory did a flip, and swept down at speed towards Boldore. She moved behind her shield, and Skarmory's wings went thack into the crystal.

Skarmory stopped in mid-air with impressive suddenness, and wobbled backwards with his wing feathers humming and shivering like leaves in a breeze.

"...ow," he said, before getting them under enough control to fly around in a circle. "I thought I could get through that…"

"That's crystalline quartz for you!" Boldore said, then stamped another foot on the ground. This time a dozen little black discs appeared next to her in a neat stack, and she used deft foot movements to sling them through the air. "Eat biotite mica! Except don't, because I'm not sure if it's healthy for you – do you have a rock diet or a biological one? Despite the name, biotite isn't biological-"

Skarmory smashed the last of the rock sheets to pieces, looked briefly relieved that he'd been able to do so, then sped up with Agility.

"Iron Head!" Skyla said. "Come around to attack her somewhere her shield thing isn't blocking!"

"Boldore!" Ash retorted. "Remember that book about special properties of crystals? Try some moonstone!"

"Technically it's hecatolite orthoclase," Boldore said, skipping to the side as Skarmory shot past on a close attack run. "But sure! Stone Edge!"

"Great!" Ash said. "Remember, that one's supposed to be about travelling, so get on it and travel!"

Boldore jumped onto the shiny lump of stone she'd created, and it hovered gracefully into the air.

"Ooh, neat!" she said. "I guess there was something in what that book said – oh yeah, that reminds me! Sand Tomb!"

What Boldore fired out wasn't sand this time either. It was a cloud of unreasonably fine dust that masked her position completely, and Skarmory flew into it in bafflement and flew out of it in a coughing fit.

"Well, it's more the kind of thing that's so fine it'd be mud if it was wet, but it's not," Boldore continued. "Oh, and if that book's accurate, then this is a great crystal for ending a fight!"

A piece of smoky quartz the size of Boldore landed on Skarmory.

"See?" Boldore asked. "I bet your willingness to continue battling is being drained away by the soothing qualities of the stone!"

"Different method, same result," Skarmory coughed. "Ow."

Skyla's third choice out of Ash's Pokémon was Croagunk, and she sent out her Swoobat to battle him.

"Well, at least this time I should have a fairly easy battle," she said. "I'm fairly sure Croagunk is Poison and Fighting?"

"That's right!" Ash agreed. "But that doesn't actually stop him from being great in battle!"

Croagunk grinned.

"Begin," Skyla instructed. "Swoobat, Heart Stamp!"

"Attack Redirection Technique," Croagunk intoned, making a symbol with his hand, and caught the Heart Stamp before throwing it to the ground.

"Okay, how did you do that?" Swoobat blinked. "That was definitely a hit, and I agree with my trainer, you're not Dark type."

"Love is hard," Croagunk said.

"That wasn't even Attract, though," Swoobat protested, flapping her wings. "I guess it has a heart in it so it looks like it, but-"

"Then clearly I dodged your Attract so well it was a different attack," Croagunk replied.

"...I'm, um, what?" Swoobat said, distinctly confused.

"Air Slash!" Skyla called.

"Croagunk, jump!" Ash ordered. "As high as you can!"

The Poison-type duly did so, springing into the air, then spotted a mote of dust left over from Boldore's battle and used it as a foot-hold to spring again.

"Now, look down!" Ash added. "You're about to be hit by a ball of rock and metal twenty-five thousand miles around, so dodge it!"

Croagunk dodged, and froze in mid-air.

"There you go!" Ash told him, with a grin. "Croagunk's great at dodging things!"

"Twenty-five thousand – you just told him to dodge the planet, didn't you?" Skyla asked, then sighed. "Well, if there was ever a battle that was going to show that I have no idea what a trainer is going to turn out to be capable of, I suppose it's this one."

"Actually, that reminds me," Ash went on. "You know how I said that battles were important to grow as a trainer? That applies to you as well – there's no way you're going to have your Pokémon improve if you don't keep testing them, and one of the best ways to do that is to have battles."

He shrugged. "I'm not great at scheduling, but I think there must be a way to actually fit Pokémon battles into your day."

Swoobat was waving her wing underneath Croagunk, then above him.

"No, seriously, how are you doing that?" she asked. "Does it involve wires? I can't see any wires."

"How are you doing that?" Croagunk replied. "You're flying, and yet you consider my doing the same to be astonishing."

"Yeah, but… I'm a Flying type?" Swoobat said. "Flying is kind of our thing, as… um… Flying types, and all."

She flicked upside down, and hung there. "You know?"

"What about if we try something with one of the members of the Ryuunited Kingdom?" Ash resumed. "Like, um, Dragonite might do. He could take over if you were running late, so people can still get a battle… oh, yeah, we should finish this one. Shadow Punch, Croagunk!"

Croagunk punched in a sort of lazy, indifferent way, and Swoobat quickly got out of the way.

On the ground, however, the shadow of Croagunk's fist detached from the rest of his shadow, and slowly moved towards Swoobat's shadow.

"So, um, is that it?" Swoobat asked.

Then the shadows touched, and Croagunk abruptly turned out to have just punched her.

"Even for your team, Ash, Croagunk always seems to come at things sideways," Pikachu said.

"I think that's just how he is," Ash replied. "Or will be, and we're living through a retroactive justification of it."

"Okay ow that made my head hurt," Pikachu complained.

AN:

Ambitious, but rubbish.