Dr Litchi vs Kokonoe
Litchi: Every time it happens, I say to myself, "Litchi, you're not the first Medical Professional to have sex with their patient, and you certainly won't be the last".
Defeated Makoto & Dr Litchi vs Kokonoe
Litchi: But then I say to myself, "Litchi, you're a vet".
Ragna vs Relius
Relius: Don't worry, it's perfectly normal to get an erection during a prostate examination.
Ragna: But I don't have an erection.
Scared Ragna vs Happy Relius
Relius: I do.
Happy Terumi
Narrator: "The sound of hoof beats 'cross the glade! Good folk lock up your son and daughter!
"Beware the deadly flashing blade! Unless you want to end up shorter!"
Scared Ragna & Angry Jubei vs Happy Nu-in-a-sombrero
Nu: "¡Yandere! ¡Yandere! ¡Arriba! ¡Arriba!"
Ragna vs Jin
Ragna: "Well as they say; When in Rome, do as the Romans do."
Yandere Jin: "What, stab each other?"
Scared Valkemhayn vs Ghostzama (in a bad Scottish accent)
Hazama: "Have ye nay heard of tale of THE OOOOOOLD EEEMMMMMPTY BAAAAAAAARN?"
Miffed Valkemhayn vs Ghostzama
Hazama: "There was nothing in it."
Happy Jin vs Ragna, Hazama & Kagura
Jin: "I'm the greatest captain of The Queen's Navy!"
R, H & K: "And your record will stand as proof!"
Jin: "Be it Galley or a Freighter I'm an expert Navigator!"
Angry Jin vs Happy Ragna, Trollzama & Drunk Kagura
R, H & K: "And you're also a world class poof!"
Trinity, Nine & Jubei vs Terumi
Nine: "He's an utter Shorpe."
Trinity: "What's a Shorpe?"
Jubei: "It's what you're left with when you take the cunt out of Scunthorpe."
Kokonoe: "I only have one reason for believing in God..."
Happy Kokonoe: "...when you've just hit yourself on the thumb with a hammer, it's nice to be able to blaspheme."
(from Berserk's legendary gag reels, Ruby standing in for Casca, Ragna for Guts. And just for the last line, really)
Raga vs Ruby
Ruby: "It's silly. I can't believe I even came wearing something like this. Look at the size of this thing. I feel like a church bell. And Michael's gonna kill me coz I've already fucked up several times. But it's okay, coz in the end I'm still pretty hot, don't you think?"
Smiling Ragna: "No."