MAGGIO COMPOUND, BENSONHURST, NEW YORK
At Sal's place, 2 security guards were outside keeping watch.
"In what police are calling one of the largest seizures of stolen goods in the history of New York City." A news woman reported.
Sal watches the news and turns to Charlie, Louis, and the Wild Kratts as they turn to each other uneasily.
"Thieves inexplicably led police to a treasure trove of stolen cars, furs, paintings-"
Sal then turns the TV off hearing enough of it.
"Louis Booker, you degenerate moron." Sal said with a look reading disgrace. "Were these Medieval times and you a knight in shining armor you would, I have no doubt, slay the maiden and save the dragon."
Waffles lightly growled at Sal.
"Shh! Waffles!" Louis whispered.
"Sal, if we could explain-" Charlie said trying to reason with his stepfather.
"As for you, Charlie, after the tragic death of your father, I married your mother, promising her I would raise you as my own." Sal said turning to Charlie. "You chose not to take the Maggio name. I did not complain. And when you wanted to go to beauty school, as boys who lose their fathers early in life often do, I did not snivel at your intentions, did I?"
"No, Salvatore, you did not." Charlie said. "In fact-"
"In fact, I bought you a beauty parlor so you could sit on your lazy butt all day." Sal said. "4.5 million you cost me. Were you anybody else, you'd be dead by now."
Jimmy nervously gulped as Louis turns to Charlie.
"Sal, we understand that you're upset." Charlie said.
"It's not your fault." Sal said taking a sip from a glass of water.
"What?" Charlie stared.
Sal then sat down. "A lion can raise a mouse, but the mouse is still a mouse." He said referring the lion and the mouse story and went up to them. "And you, Charlie, are that mouse. Look at this. He takes it. Chicken blood." He then turns away.
"Excuse me, Sal?" Louis said raising his hand.
Sal turns to him.
"You said that he was a mouse, so that would be mouse blood, not chicken blood." Louis said. "Right?"
"Not helping, Louis." Martin whispered.
Sal remained silent.
"Go on, Sal, I'm here if you need me." Louis said.
"The salient point is, I must continue to live with my lovely wife and tears on her pillow are a plethora to me." Sal said. "Anathema to me! You see what they got me doing?" He turns to one of his servants.
Charlie, Louis and the Wild Kratts turn to each other.
"I can't even talk, straight!" Sal said.
"Take it easy, Sal." The servant said.
"So... I'm giving you both another chance to redeem yourselves." Sal said.
"Thank you, we won't disappoint you." Charlie said.
"No, we won't." Louis said.
"Of that I'm sure." Sal said and turns to his right. "Frankie."
Frankie then appeared with 2 goons of his.
"Hey, kid. Go long." Frankie said to Charlie.
"Why don't you fill the boys in." Sal said. "A mission of absolution."
"It's simple." Frankie explained. "You take this envelope to JFK Airport." He held an envelope.
"No problem." Charlie said.
"Where you catch the next flight to Sydney, Australia." Frankie continued.
"Wow, that's- You know, Louis has got this thing-" Charlie said uneasily.
"Yeah, see, uh, because my mama, she got the gout, and if I'm not home to rub her feet, you know, her ankles just swell up, and-and she can't take her house shoes off." Louis said.
"Yeah, this, uh... You know, this really isn't much warning." Charlie said.
Frankie turns to Sal.
"You need a warning?" Sal asked.
"No." Charlie and Louis said in unison.
"Then, from Sydney, you take the Old South Road due north to a place called Coober Pedy where you meet a man named Mr. Smith." Frankie said handing Charlie a map of Australia. "You give this envelope to Mr. Smith." He hands the envelope to Charlie. "Mr. Smith is expecting you no later than noon, local time. You will not be late." Louis grabs the envelope from Charlie.
"What's in here, man?" Louis asked opening the envelope.
"You will not look in that envelope under any circumstances, understood?" Frankie said gripping Louis' left ear hard.
"I can't hear you-" Louis said not catching it.
"UNDERSTOOD?!" Frankie yelled.
"Oh, yeah." Louis said as Frankie released his ear.
"Should you run into any problems, you can reach Mr. Smith at this phone number." Frankie said holding a piece of paper.
Charlie took the paper piece.
"Get out of here." Sal said.
"I can't believe all that stuff happened, man." Louis said as they left the mansion. "I'm wearing my lucky jacket."
"Lucky jacket?" Charlie said. "Louis, you've been wearing that jacket for over 10 years and I've never seen luck even remotely come near you."
Nearby, a man in a car lowers a window and then snaps a photo of them with a camera as it shutter clicks.
"Australia?" A servant said. "And then they're just going to turn around and come right back again."
"It won't be so bad." Sal said finishing shaking from seasoning on his meal.
"Yeah, why not?" The servant asked.
"We're cancelling their return trip." Sal said.
SOMEWHERE OVER THE PACIFIC...
Over the vast expense of the open Pacific Ocean, a Boeing-747 soars over 30,000 feet.
"Hey, Louis, how much time we got left?" Charlie asked.
"14 hours." Louis replied.
"Man, when is the food coming?" Charlie wondered all hungry. "I'm starving."
"Oh. Don't even worry about that." Louis assured. "I got you covered."
He chuckled reaching into the pocket of his jacket.
"Bam!" Louis brought out a handful of candy. "Ha, ha!"
"Are you, like, 4 years old?" Charlie inquired.
"Well. If you're not hungry, I can always put these back in my pocket." Louis said.
"Wait, wait, wait." Charlie said. "I think I'll have this one." He grabbed a red jaw-breaker.
"Ah. Good choice." Louis said as Charlie placed it in his mouth
After a few moments, Charlie then frowned and looked as if he placed a spicy hot wing in his mouth. He then gagged as he grabbed and then pants as Louis stared.
"What is that?" Charlie asked. "And why is my mouth on fire?"
"Oh. That's the new Super Atomic Jaw Buster!" Louis said. "Extra hot!" He then chuckled.
"Are you trying to kill me?" Charlie asked.
Louis then took the jaw buster and placed in his mouth and Charlie stared as it had no effect on him. Almost as if Louis can handle extra hot spicy food.
"There's nothing wrong with this!" Louis said. "Stop acting like a baby!" He placed the candy back in his pocket.
"All right, let me up." Charlie said.
"What for?" Louis asked.
"How many things could I possibly have to do?" Charlie inquired with a deadpan look.
Louis then realized what he meant. "My bad."
He leans back as Charlie climbed over, and he then saw a woman reading a magazine as she turns to him.
"Hey, how are you doing?" Charlie asked.
"Good." She lightly smiled.
Charlie then walks off.
At his seat, Louis was reading an Australian book. And then he noticed the envelope in Charlie's bag, and he then reaches down and grabs it. He then looked back, he knows he's not suppose to open it, but his curiosity got the better of him and thought a harmless peek wouldn't hurt. He opens the envelope, and reaches inside and then brought out a handful of 100 dollar bills that might be worth at less 50,000.
"Oh, my God!" Louis quietly exclaimed and looked around. "Oh, my God." He tucks the money in the envelope and got up. "Charlie!"
He quickly got to the restroom door and knocks on the door.
"Someone's in here!" Charlie said.
"Hey, it's me, Charlie." Louis said. "Open up!"
The door swung open. "What?" Charlie asked and then Louis pushed him back in. "What the-"
The door then closed.
"Hey, you're not suppose to open this." Charlie said holding the envelope and then saw the money as his eyes widen.
"Hey, check this out." Louis said. "Hey, man, that's like 50 grand there."
"Oh, my God." Charlie said in disbelief.
"Something doesn't smell right here. Look at it!"
A flight attendant turns to the restroom door as Charlie and Louis unknowingly wish the door and wall is sound-proof.
"I know, I'm looking!" Louis said. "I've never seen so much green in one little brown package!"
"And now it's in my hands!" Charlie said and then exclaimed. "It slipped out."
The flight attendant had a disturbing look on her face.
"Here, help me scoop it up." Charlie said.
"This is one big load!" Louis said.
"What a mess!" Charlie said.
The flight attendant shook her head.
"I just want to roll around in it!" Louis said.
The flight attendant was disturbed from it.
"Hand me the rest of the pile." Charlie said.
"Can you hold it?" Louis asked.
The flight attendant then looked sick to her stomach with a disgusted look.
"No! Dump it in the envelope." Charlie said.
Then, the girl Charlie spoke to earlier nears the door.
"Maybe we should just flush it." Louis said.
"We're not gonna flush it." Charlie said. "I'm gonna put it in my pocket, leave this room, and take it to Australia."
"If you're gonna do that, give it here." Louis said. "Let me kiss it for good luck."
"You're not gonna kiss it!" Charlie said.
The girl then had a disgusted look.
"It's bad enough you touched it!" Charlie said.
"Charlie, before you put it away, can I smell it?" Louis asked.
The door then opens.
"Maybe later." Charlie said.
They then saw her.
"Oh, no, no, no, no, no." Charlie said.
"It's not what it looks like." Louis said.
They then had nervous looks.
A boat sails through Sydney Harbor, and a surfer rides a waves as it rolls.
The Boeing 747 descends and lands on the runway.
SYDNEY, AUSTRALIA
In the airport, a security guard was busy checking the passports and IDs as a man walks through.
"Next, please." He called out.
Louis snaps a photo with a Polaroid camera.
"G'day, mate!" Louis said in an Australian accent. "G'Day." He snaps another photo. "Ha, ha! G'day."
"Could you try not to draw the attention of the entire airport?" Charlie inquired looking nervous. "Thank you."
"Why? What's wrong?" Louis asked.
"The law states we're only allowed to have $10,000." Charlie said. "We are carrying $50,000 of mob money. If they find it, I'm anticipating consequences. Like, perhaps, I don't know, let's say, prison?"
"Hey, g'day, mate!" Louis greeted and snapped another photo.
"You know what? It's my fault." Charlie said getting fed up. "I didn't keep the sentences short enough."
"Hey, I heard you, Charlie, all right?" Louis said. "Now, if you're worried, give me the money. I'll walk it through."
"Oh. Okay." Charlie said. "Let me see, put my fate in your hands. This is such an agonizing decision. No."
"All right, then." Louis insisted. "Just remember: The key is to act like you don't have anything to hide, all right?"
"Next, please." The guard called out.
Louis chuckled. "Watch the master." He then snapped a photo of him. "G'day!"
Charlie blinked a few times from the flash, and watched as Louis went up to the stand.
"How are you doing?" Louis greeted.
"Doing good." The guard said. "How are you?"
"I'm all right." Louis said.
Charlie watched as the 2 chatted and laughed.
"Hit it up top!" Louis held his hand.
They then high-five each other, and Charlie turns to a man from India and back to Louis and the guard about to take a picture.
"There we go." Louis said. "There we go."
He then took the photo as he laughed.
"G'day, mate." Louis said.
Charlie watched as Louis heads off through the stand and turns to Charlie.
"Next, please." The guard said.
Charlie then grabbed his bags and went up to him.
"G'day, mate." Charlie greeted.
Next thing Charlie knew, he was in an interrogation room and pinned to the wall.
"They're my hairdressing scissors." Charlie said. "They're my hairdressing scissors!"
The security guard tossed the scissors aside and grabs Charlie's bag and dumps everything out. And Charlie turns to to him.
"I can, uh... I can explain about that money." Charlie said.
"You will explain... $63?" The guard inquired.
Charlie remained silent.
Eventually, Charlie caught up with Louis outside the airport by a Jeep, as well as the Wild Kratts in the Createrra VX.
"Louis, I lost the money!" Charlie said.
"What?" Louis said.
"I lost the money!" Charlie said. "Salvatore Maggio's money!"
"Hey, hey, hey, Charlie, Charlie, calm down, all right?" Louis said. "The trick is not to look suspicious. Make them watch this hand..." He lowered his hand in a wave motion, and lifted his right hand with the envelope of money. "Instead of this one."
"Oh, my God!" Charlie said.
Louis then laughed. "Had you going, didn't I?"
"That is not funny, Louis!" Charlie said.
"Actually it kinda is." Martin said and laughed.
"Get in the car, baby!" Louis said.
Close by, a man pushed a cart of luggage turns to them.
"What's up, they didn't have a Cadillac?" Charlie wondered climbing in the Jeep.
"This is the Cadillac of the Outback." Louis said.
They then laughed as the man held out a thin camera and snaps a photo of them as it shutter clicks.
Author's Note:
I can certainly say that plane scene with the restroom, disturbingly funny.
By the way, I'm aware that Weird N'Wild Creatures cards weren't around in the early '80's. I just felt they might've been a good choice of animal cards. I got a collection of them myself, 243 trading cards, and lots of knowledge which I don't have a head count yet. I still have a few trading cards left to find.